Chapter 2
So the blindfold is new, but honestly; they've done weirder things.
"Are you going to tell me where we're going?"
There was a hand on his lower back, another on his shoulder to help steer him. They were very clearly outside. Sirius could feel the cool autumn air blowing through his hair, he could hear the way their footsteps echoed on what seemed to be pavement, but other than that he couldn't make out much.
When they woke that morning, Severus suddenly decided that they were going out. Which was odd since the Slytherin usually liked to keep a low profile whenever they got together, that included not being seen in public together, which suited Sirius just fine for the most part. Though it was a bit of a pain sometimes, hiding this... whatever it is that they're doing. It always felt a bit annoying back in school and now that they've finished school it just seemed entirely unecessary. But Severus insisted and arguing with the raven was only fun when he knew that they'd end up in his bedroom afterwards, which arguing over the whole being seen in public thing rarely ever did.
That morning, when Severus said he wanted to go out, Sirius had been confused but also oddly excited. And then the blindfold came out and he just felt confused again.
They apparated to somewhere. Sirius didn't hear any traffic or people so again, he had no idea where. This would normally make him feel anxious, especially since he can't be completely sure of the raven's affiliations since school ended. After all, there had been rumours back in school of Severus being courted by dark forces via Lucius Malfoy and other Slytherin prats. But Severus didn't have the mark, so Sirius decided it was worth trusting the raven for a few hours at least. Besides, if Severus wanted to kill him, they both knew that he wouldn't need to lure Sirius out of his apartment to do it.
"You'll find out when we get there."
Came that familiar voice. A deep drawl, dry and disinterested. Sirius couldn't help but smile a bit himself.
"You know I'm usually up for anything but, if you're going to have us shagging out in public I'd prefer it if it wasn't somewhere that would immediately get us arrested." Sirius said with a sigh, "This is a sex thing right?"
Severus scoffed, "No."
"No?"
"Just keep your trap shut, we're almost there." Severus then sighed himself, "If you do that then maybe we can use the blindfold later."
"Is that a promise?"
Severus scoffed again just as he steered Sirius into another turn and he almost stumbled as he was led down a straight path and there was another turn onto what felt like wet grass. Sirius slipped, Severus helped him catch himself.
"Where are we?"
Severus didn't say anything, he just urged the animagus further along until the grip on his shoulder tightened and they stopped.
"We're here."
Sirius reached up to pull off the blindfold only to pause as he looked around himself.
Green grass spread out into eternity all around them with a tree or two here and there. Black stone walkways went between the long patches of grass but what struck Sirius more than anything else were the tombstones lined up all around them on the grassy planes, in varying shades of grey and black. Sirius couldn't help but swallow hard when his eyes landed on a tombstone a bit further away that had an angel with its hands brought together in prayer above it.
"Uh, Severus... Again, usually I'm up for anything but this seems a bit more... sacrilegious than I'm comfortable with."
Severus came to stand beside him, "Look down."
Sirius looked down and then froze.
In front of them was a headstone made of black granite on a similar black granite grave stone with the Black family crest carved onto it, the tiny silver specks in the stone gleaming almost as much as the silver lettering that read.
In Loving Memory of Walburga Black. Devoted Wife and Loving Mot-
"You miserable bastard." Sirius hissed, his hands clenched at his sides as he glared at the head stone. Severus took a deep breath.
"I spoke to Regulus. You didn't show for the funeral. Still hiding from your mother like the snivelling wretch you are, I see." His words were harsh but his voice was barely above a whisper.
"You had no right-"
"Stop being a coward Black. You owe her that-"
Severus was cut off when a fist suddenly landed square on his jaw and sent him tumbling to the ground a few feet away. He only had a moment to register the pain and groan before a weight had suddenly settled ontop of him and a hand clutched tigthly in his robes. He looked up into stormy grey eyes filled with rage, betrayal... so much hurt.
"Shut up! I don't owe her anything! You had no right to force me here!"
Severus simply stared back, "She's your mother."
"You worthless piece of shit! Why did you bring me here?!" Sirius screamed as he shook the raven in his grasp, lifiting him from the ground just to slam him back down again. He did this not once but twice, Severus cringed the second time but Sirius didn't care.
There were so many emotions warring within him right at that moment. Too many to count... too many to feel. He tried to force them down and away but they wouldn't. They kept forcing themselves back up, making something in his chest tighten while his throat ached. It was made so much worse by the look in Severus' eyes. That odd unfamiliar softening that made those onyx eyes warm to a point where he could almost see the pupil in those dark eyes. Something that made Sirius flinch.
"Why?! Why did you bring me here! Why would you bring me to my mother's grave?!"
"Because you came with me to see mine." Severus said so simply, so quietly that Sirius just froze.
Severus then reached up to cup the animagus, face his thumb brushing against his cheek to wipe tears that Sirius hadn't even realised had started falling at some point. His head gave a tilt against the grass.
"I don't like owing people. I thought I'd finally return the favor."
In seventh, when Severus' mother died, the Prince family apparently came back to claim the body of what they considered to be their last heir. Though Severus took time off of school to attend the funeral, he hadn't been allowed to actually go near the grave while it was taking place. When Severus returned he ended up telling Sirius.
It had been months since Severus even let the animagus come near him, after the incident with Moony; Sirius didn't think he ever would. It was one of the dumbest things he'd ever done, not only because he'd risked revealing Remus' secret to the world. He isn't even completely sure why he'd done it, or rather... he had an idea but the idea seemed so insane even to his mind that he just convinced himself that it had to have been something else.
Severus had suddenly started asking about Remus. Why he always seemed to be sick once a month, why he always seemed so odd in the days before those very specific sick days in the month? Sirius was just struck by how Severus seemed to actually be paying attention to Remus and how he kept asking questions about him. The last straw seemed to be one incident where they'd ended up fooling around in the astronomy tower again. Sirius was still trying to come down from his high. He'd just pressed a kiss against the back of the raven's neck, when Severus asked about bloody Moony again. An oddly dark feeling washed over him just then. Anger and annoyance that even then Severus' mind was on Remus when it should have been on-
He told Severus about the shack. Severus went and it all turned into one big mess.
Later, he'd suddenly realise that about a week before Severus started asking about Remus, Damocles Belby had just revealed his wolfsbane potion and received the Order of Merlin. It would suddenly hit Sirius that despite the tension that often rose whenever the Slytherin was around his friends, Remus was the only one that never actually picked on him. It would hit Sirius that Severus was probably just curious and hadn't developed any sort of interest in Moony.
It would hit Sirius that maybe he'd gotten more attached to Severus than he intended.
Sirius realised he messed up and didn't think that the raven would ever want anything to do with him again.
But all of the sudden, Severus dragged Sirius off to an abandoned classroom after potions. Sirius hadn't minded at first, it had been ages since they touched and at the time the Gryffindor didn't care why Severus suddenly wanted to start up again, he was just grateful that he did. That is, until Severus suddenly started crying moments after they both came. He'd never done that before.
He told Sirius about the funeral and Sirius just-
It felt wrong seeing Severus like that. The Slytherin has always been smaller than most of the boys in their year, but it was the first time that Sirius had ever seen him look so completely vulnerable. Well, the first time since that day by the la-
He just, he needed to try and fix it.
That night he borrowed James' cloak and practically dragged Severus from the dungeons. They used one of the many secret tunnels to get to Hogsmeade and then the Hogshead and then, Sirius forked over five galleons for a portkey to get them as close to the Prince family cemetary as possible.
They found Severus' mother's grave, Sirius pretended like he didn't see the raven cry and sob for what felt like hours but was really only about thirty minutes and then they headed back to school. They didn't speak on the way back, not even after they made it back to the school.
But, just before Sirius left Severus in the dungeons the raven had leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. He pulled away but Sirius stopped him, grabbing a hold of his arm.
"Severus, I'm sorry... about Remus. I should've never-"
"Don't apologise, Black. Don't make this weird."
Snape said with a slight smile before dissappearing back into the dungeons.
They never spoke of that day. Sirius never told his friends, not even Remus about what happened that night.
The hand was still on his cheek, Sirius finally felt the lump that had grown and ached in his throat. He could finally feel the flush in his face. His jaw clenched, he swallowed hard, ignored the tears that continued to fall down his cheeks as his hands clenched in Severus' robes.
"I-" His voice cracked, "I don't-"
"There's no shame in it, you know." Severus said with the softest smile spreading over his lips, "There's no shame loving someone you should hate. It just, means that you have a heart... either that or you're insane. I'll be honest, I'm not sure which one you are but; I'm betting on the latter."
A startled laugh left the animagus' throat. He laughed and laughed and kept laughing even as he let his head rest on Severus' chest, right there where he'd been clutching his robes as he slumped ontop of the raven. Only for that laughter to turn into sobs when Severus brought a hand to his hair and combed his fingers through it.
He's not sure how long they were out there for. It was long enough for their clothes to feel damp from the wet grass and for him to feel a bit awkward lying there ontop of the other. He lifted his head and Snape looked down at him and then frowned.
"If you got snot on my robes you stupid mutt, I'll bury you along with your mother."
Sirius blinked, that hit close. Of course it did, but somehow he couldn't feel himself get angry at the raven. Instead he just scoffed as he finally sat up and pulled away.
"I'll haunt you for the rest of your life if you try and force me to spend eternity with her."
He wiped his face and sniffed. Snape sat up as well, reaching into his robes to pull out his wand and then a tiny bundle. He enlarged the bundle into a bouquete of white lilies. Sirius blinked and the raven rolled his eyes.
"I figured the great Walburga Black would appreciate something better than weeds ripped off the side of the road."
Sirius just stared at the flowers, remembering how he'd grabbed some yellow weed flowers off the side of the road and transfigred them into lilies when he took Severus to his mother's grave. There hadn't been time to get anything better.
"She hated lilies you know."
Severus shrugged, "All the better. Besides, I took them off of a trashcan behind a supermarket last night anyway."
He looked at the flowers, he could tell Severus was lying. Sirius scoffed anyway as he took the flowers and got up off the ground and took a deep breath before walking over to Walburga's gravestone. He heard and felt Severus get up as well but he didn't look back. He leaned over and set the flowers on the grave and just stared at it.
In Loving Memory of Walburga Black
Devoted Wife and Loving Mother
Loving mother.
Sirius couldn't even snort at that one. He just stared.
You're supposed to say something at times like these right? Sirius didn't know what to say.
He almost jumped when he felt a hand slip into his own and looked up to see Severus beside him. The raven just stared at the grave as well.
With one more deep breath, Sirius leaned over to kiss the headstone and pulled back.
"Goodbye mum." With that he turned and walked away, his hand tightened around Severus' and he pulled the other along so they were walking side by side as they left the cemetary.
When they got back to Sirius' apartment, they were still quiet. Until Severus-
"I should go."
Before he could leave Sirius pulled back on his hand and pulled the raven into his arms. Severus blinked when the animagus simply pressed a kiss on his temple and gave him a soft smile.
"Thank you, Severus."
Severus nodded, his lips almost pulling into a smile, "You're welcome."
His thumb brushed against the raven's cheek.
"I'm so-"
"Don't apologise. Don't make this weird."
Sirius leaned in to kiss him again when the door suddenly opened and they both looked back to see James standing frozen in the door. The hazel eyed wizard stared for a brief moment, taking in the grass stains on the back of Snape's robes and on patches near Sirius' knees. The bruise on Severus' cheek that was slowly darkening.
James' lips twisted in disgust and he glared, "I don't even want to know."
Severus looked like he was trying very hard not to roll his eyes as he pulled free of the animagus' grasp.
"Goodbye Black. Drop dead, Potter."
"You first Snivellus!"
Sirius couldn't help but grin as he watched the raven walk right by James and slam the door shut behind him as he left.
James frowned, "Were you actually outside? Doing... whatever it is you were doing?"
Sirius looked over to his friend and his grin widened, "Oh sweet naive James, were I to tell you of all the disgusting, depraved, immoral things Severus and I got up to today-"
"Padfoot please-"
"Even had him on his back and gasping in the middle of a cemetery."
"A ceme-" James looked horrified, "I don't want to know!"