Chapter 22
Harrison returned to school a week later, the day before the first task. He had already begun his new diet at Malfoy Manor, so he was a little taller and fitter, but he needed to continue his diet for another two weeks.
He felt incredibly free without the Horcrux in his head. Half of his magic had been struggling to keep it from overpowering his own soul, and now he had excess magic that would react if he got angry. Cissa had warned him that his wand might be incompatible with him now that his magic was free, but he wouldn't know until he tried to cast a spell.
His friends looked terrified when he returned, especially Cedric, Fleur, and Viktor.
"What is it?" he sighed.
"The first task is dragons," Ron said, his expression pale.
"What? Who in their right mind-!" Harrison began angrily, then paused. "Dumbledore."
"It's not just that, Harrison," Neville said hoarsely. "It's nesting mothers. They're always more dangerous than other dragons. You're supposed to get a fake egg from them."
"They won't let me anywhere near the eggs," Harrison groaned. "I'm suing the entire Ministry."
"I don't think you can do that, Harrison," Hermione said practically, although she looked a bit green.
"Now there's just one question," Harrison sighed.
"What?"
"How the f*ck am I going to prank a dragon?"
"You are not pranking a dragon!" Draco squawked.
"Fine, I'll prank the audience," Harrison shrugged.
Blaise cleared his throat. "Some species of dragon can speak Parseltongue."
"That might be helpful," Harrison agreed. "Do you know what types of dragons there are?"
"Hungarian Horntail, Chinese Fireball, Swedish Short-Snout, and Common Welsh Green," Viktor answered.
"Chinese Fireball," Blaise said. "They're Chinese -- wingless. They also have more deadly fire, so you might want more protection."
"I'll paint protection runes on my uniform," Harrison shrugged. "Now, who's got an idea for a prank?"
-------
The next day, Snape took him down to the Quidditch Pitch. There was a huge tent covering both the stands and the field, and right outside was a smaller tent, where the other champions were, presumably.
Snape stopped Harrison before he could enter. "Do you have a plan, Harrison?"
Harrison grinned mischievously, and Snape groaned, pinching his nose. "You will be careful."
"I'm a Slytherin, Professor," Harrison drawled, mocking him. "I have fire protection runes on my uniform."
"You altered yours," Snape hummed, frowning at the outfit.
Originally, the body suit had been more masculine. Now it fit Harrison's curves and had a rather low V-neck. It was eerie green, bringing out his eyes, and the runes were drawn in silver. Draco had drooled when he'd seen Harrison in it.
"I like feminine clothing more, most of the time," Harrison shrugged.
Snape nodded. "In. And good luck."
Harrison handed him a pair of ear plugs in response, and Snape groaned. "I don't want to know."
Sniggering, Harrison entered the tent.
"Mr. Potter!" Bagman said brightly. "Good-o!"
Harrison ignored him in favor of greeting the other champions. "May the best MJ win!" he said with a grin.
"I plan to," Viktor smirked.
"I highly doubt zat you will beat me," Fleur sniffed good-naturedly.
Cedric snorted. "I think you'll find nobody can beat Harrison."
"Yes, well," Bagman said in confusion. "Let's begin, shall we?" He held up a small purple sack. "When the audience has assembled, I'm going to be offering each of you this bag, from which you will each select a small model of the thing you are about to face! There are different -- er -- varieties, you wee. And I have to tell you something else too... ah yes... your task is to collect the golden egg!"
"Pog," Harrison drawled. The other three champions snickered.
Several minutes later, when they could hear lots of excited chattering coming from the stands, Bagman held the bag up to Fleur. "Ladies first."
Fleur rolled her eyes and reached inside. She yelped and quickly yanked her hand out. There was a Welsh Green perched on her hand, with the number two around its neck. It blew a spout of flames into the air.
"You all right, Scarlet?" Harrison asked. He ignored Bagman's puzzled expression at the nickname.
"Fine," she grimaced. "One of zem nipped me."
Harrison reached in next and, feeling around, found the dragon with no wings. He gently extracted the fiery dragon. It had a number three around its neck.
"~Hello,~" he crooned. Bagman blanched.
~Speaker!~ the dragon said excitedly.
"Huh, I didn't expect the mini one to speak," Harrison hummed. "~I'm Harrison. Do you have a name?~"
~No.~
"~How do you feel about Titan?~"
The scarlet dragon puffed out his chest. ~I like that name.~
"This it Titus," Harrison grinned, holding up the tiny dragon.
"'ello, Titus," Fleur crooned, and Titus preened. "Would you like our dragons as well, 'arrison?"
"I think Charlie Weasley would be ecstatic if you gave yours to him," Harrison corrected, realizing that Viktor and Cedric had their dragons as well.
Bagman cleared his throat, and they turned to him. "You have each pulled the dragon you're going to face. When you hear the whistle, Mr. Diggory, you'll go into the enclosure. Er -- Mr. Potter? Can I have a word?"
"No," Harrison retorted.
Bagman looked taken aback. "I'm not-"
"-my guardian or my teacher?" Harrison interjected. "You can ask me in front of my friends."
"Have you -- have you figured out what to do?" Bagman asked with a grimace.
"Yes. Now go away."
Fleur and Cedric laughed, but Viktor cast Bagman a suspicious look. "Vhy are you helping Harrison?" he demanded, eyes narrowed.
A whistle blew, and Bagman fled. Cedric gave Harrison a fist-bump and followed.
The other three champions had decided to use pranks as well. They would also be very careful not to hurt the eggs.
Cedric's plan was to cast several illusions of himself, then make himself invisible and make his scent undiscernible to the dragon. The Swedish Short-Snout didn't hear him sneaking towards the nest over his illusions arguing about who was the "Better Fake Cedric."
Fleur used fire to draw funny pictures in the air. She also made herself invisible and hide her scent. Veela were very quick, so she escaped using her winged form.
Viktor would be using smoke and mirrors -- literally. He was going to conjure several dragon-size mirrors and mist to trick the dragon into thinking there were multiple Viktors and dragons... and the mirrors were ones used in funhouses.
Harrison didn't see any of that. He simply left when the whistle blew after Fleur had finished.
The Chinese Fireball was curled atop her eggs. She gave him a dark look.
"~Good morning, lady dragon!~" Harrison said politely. He ignored the gasps.
She glared at him. ~Stay away from my eggs, speaker.~
"~I won't touch them,~" Harrison responded. "~I just need the golden egg.~"
~The false egg?~ she said with a frown. ~Why? It is useless, it has no hatchling inside.~
"~It has a clue inside,~" Harrison said excitedly. "~It won't damage your eggs, but I really do need it.~" He paused. "~I've been rude! I'm Harrison, what's your name?~"
~Etheria,~ she responded, eyes softening. ~I will give you the golden egg, young hatchling.~
"~Pog! There's something I need to do first, though,~" Harrison said with a grin. "~Just a little prank on the idiots who made a hatchling participate in a dangerous game. You should probably cover your ears, lady Etheria.~"
Etheria obliged.
Harrison pulled out his wand and pointed it at his throat. "Sonorus! IF YOU WERE GIVEN EARPLUGS PRIOR TO THE TRIAL, INSERT THEM IN YOUR EARS."
And then he began singing.
The Ministry lost the plot!
The Ministry lost the plot!
High-ho-dario
The Ministry lost the plot!
Harrison's horrible, screechy voice exploded across the stands. All of his friends, a majority of the teachers, the foreign students, and all of the younger students had been given earplugs, and, while they could hear the lyrics, were not suffering like the rest of the guests.
Dumblebutt needs a shave!
Dumblebutt needs a shave!
High-ho-dario
Dumblebutt needs a shave!
I am not amused!
I am not amused!
High-ho-dario
I am not amused!
I care not for fame!
I am not a dame!
High-ho-dario
Come back from whence you came!
Harrison sang several more verses about his dislike of being forced into a dangerous tournament, how the Ministry needed to stop putting children against deadly creatures, and how Dumbledore was a manipulative a**hole. When he finished, he bowed and nodded to Etheria. A majority of the stands burst out laughing, while Bagman, McGonagall, and several of the students sputtered angrily.
The Chinese Fireball lowered her claws and said dryly, ~You are a terrible heart-speaker, young hatchling.~
That must be what dragons call singing. Harrison grinned. "~Thank you! I hope the idiots enjoyed my complaints.~"
Chuckling, the mother gently picked up the golden egg and passed it to him. Harrison thanked her again, said farewell, and entered the medical tent.
Madam Pomfrey tried to talk to him, but he snapped, "I don't trust you, and I'm not hurt. Where are my friends?"
"They -- they're waiting in the champion's tent," she whispered. "They weren't hurt, either."
Harrison left without another word.
Cedric was on the floor, dying with laughter. Fleur grinned when she saw Harrison. "Zat was beautiful, 'arrison. I do not zink Dumbledore enjoyed it, zo."
"That wasn't my intention," Harrison responded, smirking back.
A moment later Harrison was called back to see his points.
"Mr. Potter, er, gave us a... serenade and got his egg the fastest," Bagman said, still cringing. "Let's see what his points are."
Madam Maxime shot an elegant eight into the air. She looked amused and frustrated at the same time. Harrison gave her a wink, and she sighed irritably.
Mr. Crouch was blank faced as he cast a nine. Harrison wondered if he was okay.
Dumbledore gave Harrison a four. Harrison ignored that; he knew Parseltongue was Dark and didn't give a f*ck.
Bagman gave him a ten, which made Harrison more suspicious. He had given the others less points and they had done more impressive magic.
Karkaroff was incredibly pale, and he cast Harrison a frightened look before giving him a ten as well. Harrison grinned maniacally, making the man shudder.
"Pup!"
"Oof!"
"Cub, stop giving Karkaroff a heart attack," Remus said dryly as he pulled the two of them into a hug.
"But it's fun!"
Remus gave him a stern look, and Harrison responded by sticking his tongue out at him. Sirius cackled.
"Ow! Moony!"
-------
Cedric: 8 + 8 + 9 + 6 + 6 = 37
Fleur: 9 + 8 + 5 + 6 + 6 = 34
Viktor: 8 + 8 + 5 + 6 + 10 = 37
Harrison: 8 + 9 + 4 + 10 + 10 = 41