Fool's Mate
When I put on a show
I feel the adrenaline moving through my veins
Spotlight on me and I'm ready to break
I'm like a performer, the dance floor is my stage
Better be ready, hope that you feel the same
In the bathroom, Mary shuts the door to the stall, Marlene sits on the edge of the counter while Lily splashes water onto her shirt trying to vanish the stain cursing the ministry for her inability to perform magic outside of school, a simple swish of her wand would take care of it instantly.
The door cracks the silence bringing with it the music and chatter from outside “Sorry, this was a bad idea, I’ll leave you to it” Ursa turns back on her heels. When Lily tells her she doesn’t have to she smirks at the door. She wipes the smug look off her face as she turns back around like it was never there “oh, come on, are you really gonna tell me you weren’t talking trash about me?”
“We genuinely weren’t” Marlene assures her, so earnest and caring, it makes Ursa want to gag
“Come on,” she stares down at the ground with puppy eyes and fidgets with her hands instead “I wasn’t very… sly, just then”
“Maybe you’ve been spending too much time with Slytherins” Marlene offers and Ursa grants the breathed laugh Marlene looked for
“Though yeah, that was a bit painful to watch” Lily admits and Ursa stares down at her shoes in feigned shame
"You were a bitch" Mary calls from inside the stall
“I know" she admits to her hands "I don’t know any other way to make it up to him” she says after a long moment of silence “I—"
"You…?" Lily encourages her, deciding to follow James’ gut. Mary rolls her eyes and slams the stall's door open, her friends are way too innocent and forgiving. She slams the faucet open and forcefully washes her hands. Such a drama queen, Ursa guesses she was the perfect beard for her idiot brother, another drama queen.
"Salazar, I’ve been spending too much time with Gryffindors, can we pretend this never happened" Mary clearly won’t believe a spontaneous burst of “vulnerability”
"It's okay, you can talk to us" Lily holds out a hand in offering, a welcoming gesture. These people are so predictable, it's so easy it's not even fun. It’s actually kind of sad.
"I think that's enough humiliation for one night" Ursa gives her a wobbly smile
"Good thing the offer doesn't have an expiration date then" Lily grins at her and she laughs.
"Come here" she grabs a tissue and helps her wipe away the stain "I'm a bitch" she admits, holding Mary's eye knowing that’s what she wants to hear. She turns the faucet off, flicks the water off and leans against the sink with a quirked brow "I mean, I'm not? Except, when it comes to him, I kind of am? Psychologically I understand why that is but— I’m bad with feelings and all that. It's like I can't help being awful to him. We’re awful to each other, it’s what we do, it's like second nature at this point and I'm trying not to, I'm trying to be better but I just can't— expressing my feelings isn’t really my thing and I can't ever seem to get it right. But they do." She meets Lily's eye and the frantic, manic ramblings become stern and she has to swallow down a smirk at Lily’s broad eyes. They’re actually strikingly pretty, she doesn’t mind staring at them from this close "And you can't take them from them. I won't let you"
"No one's taking anyone from anybody."
"We were all there when James professed his undying love for you in the Great Hall and you turned him down" It'd been corny, desperate and parthetic. Then it turned brilliant and hilarious when Lily rejected him and shattered his tiny little heart. If only it'd stayed broken. There’s not a single doubt in her mind of that crush being long gone but these Gryffindors don’t need to know that
"That was two years ago, and I don't want to take him— or Remus. Even if I did want to— which I don’t— they're head over heels for your brothers, do you really think I could? They wouldn't let themselves be taken"
"I'd hate to settle your mind," Mary sighs "but they're so smitten it's disgusting"
"Remus said you helped him figure out he still wants Sirius in his life, so maybe you're getting some of it right" Lily grins kindly and warmly at her. She returns the smile, shinning just as brightly and layering it with appreciation and hesitancy. She “accidentally” lets a few tears roll down before she turns her face away and wipes them away
“Can we please pretend this never happened?”
“Forgotten” Lily tucks her hair behind her ear with a soft, friendly smile
“God, if my mother could see me now” She chuckles and Lily pulls her into a hug
“Right” Mary glares at her “we’re mudbloods”
“And Gryffindors” Ursa reminds her
“Is that a problem for you? Do you think you’re better than us because of your blood?”
“I think blaming my superiority on my blood would be belittling myself”
“So you think you’re better than us, just not because of your blood?” Marlene frowns at her and she nods
“I think I’m better than everyone, and it’s definitely not because of something as trivial as my blood. I mean, look at my brothers, we have the same blood and they’re both idiots”
“Do you really expect us to believe you don’t share your family’s beliefs on blood purity? You’re friends with Rosier for fuck’s sakes! I’ve heard you say that to people!”
“Only to piss Sirius off”
“You expect me to believe that?!”
“Barty once called me a mudblood and she said that was the most unoriginal insult there was” Lily notes
“Yeah, I guess I don’t remember you ever actually saying the word without Sirius around” Marlene scratches her chin in thought
“Look, I come from a long line of incest. I’m not about to start judging people based on their blood” Mary glares at Ursa and she takes the full intensity of it, she doesn’t shy away from it
“Fine” Mary says at last “I’ll give you a chance. One. If you blow it, you’re done”
“Oh, is that what we’re doing? Am I meant to be trying to impress you?” she laughs and Mary smiles as she nods “Alright. If I’m meant to be impressing you then why don’t we go back out and you can hear me talk some more Russian?”
“How many languages can you speak?”
“I’d tell you but then you’d think I was bragging and I’d lose my only chance” she holds the door open for them. Mary rolls her eyes at her but Marlene grins at her bashfully.
When she steps back outside the girls are convinced she’s genuinely doing her best to change her ways. Appealing to a Gryffindor’s hero-complex has always been the easiest way to wrap them around your little finger. The three girls are desperate to make her feel comfortable and welcomed. They spin, twirl and dance until they’re tired and sweaty.
There's only two types of guys out there
Ones that can hang with me and ones that are scared
So, baby, I hope that you came prepared
I run a tight ship, so beware
I'm like the ring leader, I call the shots (call the shots)
I'm like a firecracker, I make it hot
In the end, the lonesomeness of the dingy bar is made up by the bartender’s willingness to let Ursa and Marlene make their drinks and pour the forty year olds their drinks. Essentially his willingness to let them do his job for him, but still better than conversing with Gryffindors. Besides, she’s glad to practice her Russian. Plus, Marlene isn’t terrible company and she never disliked mixing up drinks, even if Regulus is the true expert. But Regulus is busy playing tongue twister with James on a dark corner. The girls’ reaction to that at the beginning of the night was vastly underwhelming, a mere shrug and smile from Lily, Marlene’s hi-five to James and Mary’s question of if that meant he was into Sirius too. Surprisingly, Mary’s reaction had been the only one sembling any trace of amusement and alright, Ursa had to admit at least they were better than her brother’s band of buffoons.
Peter sits on a stool, cheeks flushed red from the laughter and beer, he chuckles as the bartender scolds Marlene’s attempt to open a beer with her teeth “They’re too focused on trying to see down her shirt to care about her saliva”
“They could be your roditeli!” The bartender named Mike says, scandalized by Ursa’s words. Parents, Ursa mouths the translation for the other two
“I don’t think that’s stopping them” Peter agrees with Ursa
“I bet some are parents” Marlene glances at them like they smell foul and shivers. They probably do.
“That never stopped men from being disgusting”
“And that’s why they’re the inferior gender” Marlene clinks the beer to Ursa’s drink in agreement
“Not all men” Mike says and the two girls roll their eyes in unison. As if on cue one of those men whistles at them.
“Hey sweetheart! Be a doll and hurry with that beer” he winks at her and neither of the girls bother hiding their disgust at his sweaty, red, pork face.
“I’ll better get this to them before they decide to come here” Mike takes the beer from Marlene and slips away from the bar “Nichego ne trogay!” Don’t touch anything!
“I have to pee” Marlene yells at them. The music isn’t loud but it turns out her alcohol tolerance isn’t either, so the entire bar learns of her need for liquid evacuation. Ursa sits next to Peter and he feels his pulse quicken. He immediately curses himself for it, idiot. He wishes she’d take that flower off her hair, it makes her look like the goddess of spring and queen of the underworld, Persephone. He knows when she flirts with him he won’t be able to stop his breath from hitching nor his skin from tingling, his hand twitches with the want to feel her, roam her. At least his face is already flushed from the alcohol so she won’t notice the way her words bring color to his cheeks.
“My flower matches your eyes” she tucks her flower behind his ear and they do, the same shade of light blue, she probably did it on purpose. He ignores the brighter shade of pink his cheeks turn
“Do you really think anyone will believe we’re actually together?” he blurts out and instantly regrets it.
“Why?” she frowns at her in what looks like genuine confusion and curiosity but he knows better
“I think you already know why”
“Yeah, but I want you to tell me. Why?” she crosses one leg over the other and regards him carefully
“Ursa, I’m not like you. I’m not smart or beautiful or a good liar, the world doesn’t bow down at my feet. I’m no one and you’re… you’re you. I know gays who say they’d go straight for you! Who in their right mind would ever believe that out of everyone you can have you’d choose me? Or that it’s not some stupid, messed up prank or whatever? I’m not James with his blind courage or Remus with his resilience, I’m just… Peter, I’m just… I’m just a rat”
“YA dam vam dve minuty” I’ll give you two a minute Mike turns back on his heels as quick as he came when he catches word of their conversation and pretends to clean the jukebox to give them privacy
“James and Remus aren’t the ones who impressed me. Most people aren’t. But you, Peter the rat, are” she bops his nose and his eyes cross as he stares at the spot she just brushed. He hates the way his breath hitches at her words and brief touch “Using your own—very real—insecurities to get what you want? Smart. Sounds like something I would do” his pulse quickens for an entire different reason now
“I—I don’t know what you mean”
“Yes, you do. We both know the real reason behind your little self deprecating speech. You’re smart enough not to wanna be under Voldie’s radar. You’re actually smart enough to want out of this, just like I do, so if you come up with a way out, let me know” she pats his knee and hops off her stool. Easy as a breeze, she took one look at him and saw the slippery rat inside of him people missed and his friends dismissed. She caught a glimpse of the hidden cockroach beneath and instead of being repulsed she said she was impressed. She took one look at his animagus and thought useful
“Can you at least be nice to me?” he doesn’t know where that comes from but he doesn’t take it back “I don’t think my self-esteem can handle you otherwise” he says and she smiles. Did he just do it again? Did he just use his own insecurities to try and get what he wants? Fuck, maybe she’s right, how long has he been doing that for?
“What’s in it for me?”
“Does there have to be a reason?”
“No,” she sits back on her stool and smiles “but I want something so, yes”
“What is it?”
“You can’t tell anyone about it” she warns him
“Why not?”
“Because secrets keep you alive” he stares at the intensity in those dark grey eyes and dares to nod
“What do you want?”
“Not yet. Not tonight. Today I’ll be good to you for free” she bops his nose with a radiant smile and eyes twinkling carefree
“Be nice to the others as well” he negotiates “and stop flirting with me”
“Don’t you want to have something that they don’t? For the first time feeling above them instead of the usual beneath them?” she furrows her brows at him like she sincerely doesn’t understand his reasoning. He knows though, the only thing sincere about her is that she’s sincerely manipulating him. He doesn’t know however, that she’s merely toying with him for fun, if she truly wanted him to fold, she’d make him, he’d bend so far back his spine cracks
“I don’t feel beneath them”
“But they sure treat you like you were. How many times has my brother cracked a joke at your expense or James dismissed your presence so he could talk with his precious best friend? How many times has Remus stared at him while you talk, wishing he were talking to him instead of you? Don’t you want them to repent?” he shuts his eyes and reminds himself she’s trying to manipulate him, even if it’s true, even if she’s not lying, using his own already existing thoughts and insecurities to manipulate him
“No. Stop manipulating me”
“Are you sure?” she leans closer to him, her hand finding its way to his knee and up to his thigh
“Yes” he shoves her hand away
“Fine.” She pouts at him and it cracks into laughter like it’s only been a game and he realizes that for her, it’s all it’s ever been “I won’t flirt with you until you ask me to do it and I won’t be mean to Remus and James” she grants
“That’s not what I said, I said be nice”
“I know. But that’s not what I’m offering” she has that look on her face, like when they’re playing chess and he knows he might regret what he says next
“Fine. Deal”
“Good.” She leans forwards on her stool “You should tuck my hair behind my ear, Lily’s staring at us and you’re supposed to be falling in love with me”
“Doesn’t sound like something I would do” the glitter in her eye doesn’t tease him, it’s the same that glowed when they played chess and he finds he doesn’t mind staring at that glimmer
“Then maybe it’s about time you change that. May I?” he nods, she lets her fingers brush his cheek as she tucks her flower back behind her ear
“Stop hiding behind your friends” when she smiles at him her eyes twinkle with the lights “Now, I think I’m gonna go save my brother from having Lupin cut off his ball” she nods to the sour-wolf with a delighted expression as Sirius grinds against Mary in what he calls dancing “How daft can he be?” she sighs and marches over to them. Peter stares after them and Marlene returns to her post behind the bar, Mike joins them.
“Dance with me?” Peter takes Ursa’s advice to stop hiding and holds a hand out for Marlene who takes it with a smile.
There's only two types of people in the world
The ones that entertain, and the ones that observe
Well, baby, I'm a put-on-a-show kind of girl
Don't like the back seat, gotta be first (oh-oh)
I'm like the ring leader, I call the shots (call the shots)
I'm like a firecracker, I make it hot
Two hours later finds them back at the Potter house, lounging in the garden, silencing charms to not disrupt the older Potters’ sleep (Ursa’s considerate insistence, Sirius couldn’t stop himself from rolling his eyes at it), emptying the reminders of overpriced alcohol bottles. Bowie plays softly in the background, one of Sirius’ records (Remus inconsiderate insistence)
Usually nobody is allowed to touch Sirius’ precious, luscious hair, except for the exception of Remus if he ever dared (he’d probably be allowed to yank on it too. Encouraged even). In spite of this, somehow Ursa of all people is allowed to braid flowers into his hair the way she already did for Lily. Yellow flowers for her and pink ones for him..
Lily quizzes the three of them on different languages. Alright, more than a quiz it’s more like a fun experimentation, an odd fascination if you will. One Sirius falls behind by so many points it’s not even a competition. Ursa and Regulus are mostly tied though (not that any of them could tell if they weren’t)
“I’ve always wanted to learn a second language” Mary muses
“It gets easier the more you learn”
“Show off” Mary throws tiny bits of fresh, green grass at her and gets a smile and wink in return
“Which language would you like to learn?”
“I don’t know. Maybe French, it sounds so romantic” she swoons
“What about you Remus, if you were to learn a new language which one would it be?” Lily snaps him out of his daze. His Sirius daze. Really, were the flowers necessary? He was already hard to look away from, he didn’t need the extra beauty.
“Huh?” he blinks at her
“What language would you like to learn? Besides English and, oh, you already know Welsh, don’t you?” Mary asks as Marlene and James start off on a push up competition Peter is the judge for
“Probably French as well” he doesn’t have to think too much about it
“Really?” Sirius stares at him so unaware of how Remus can’t take his eyes off him
“Yeah, might be nice to know what you’re mumbling in your sleep”
“What? I don’t talk on my sleep”
“I’ve literally kick you every night because of it” Ursa informs him
“I thought it was because I was snoring”
“You don’t snore” Remus informs him with far too much intensity for his sentence, like knowing it is something intimate
“You don’t either” Sirius holds his stare matching in intensity. Ursa would smack him on the head if she hadn’t just finished braiding it to perfection
“Questo è il tentativo più patetico de flirt a cui abbia mai assistito" that's the most pathetic attempt at flirting I've ever witnessed she cringes “e ti ho visto flirtare” and I've seen you flirt she smirks at her twin, smug
“oh, perché sei così bravo" Oh, cause you’re so good at it Regulus snaps back at her. She raises a brow and he growls, he knows she is “Oh, sta zitto” oh, shut up
“Banca, ¿vos sabes hablar algún idioma céltico?” Hold on, do you know how to speak any Celtic language
“No. Y vos tampoco porque sino ya me lo habrías restregado en la cara” No. And neither do you because otherwise you would’ve rubbed it in my face by now They both turn to Remus with greed, he can unlock a whole new level of languages.
“Ha!” Marlene beams “I win!” she scoffs at James who’s flat on the ground
“Not fair! Reg seduced me!”
“He wasn’t even looking to you” Peter points out
“Peter, come here” Ursa waves him over and he obeys. She presses her hand on his shoulder for him to sit on the ground where Sirius was a minute ago and starts braiding his blond hair, it’s shorter thus harder but she still manages it
“So you expect me to just ignore how fucking sexy he sound while speaking Italian?” James argues
“Actually, that was Spanish”
“I still win” Marlene flips her ponytail back
“Reg, you have to make it up to me. You made me lose” James pouts at him and leans towards him
“l'auriez-vous préféré en français?'' Would you have prefered it in french? Regulus gives him a tiny smug smile and James’ jaw drops, he practically drools, nearly foaming at the mouth
“He’s right, that is sexy” Mary agrees as James dips to kiss Regulus who he gets all to himself
“I don’t kiss losers” he teases him and turns his head so he kisses his cheek instead. James gasps in offense
“Mckinnon, I demand a do-over!”
“I don’t think so Romeo”
“Pete!” James whines, literally pouting at this point
“No can do, baby doll”
“Please don’t ever say that again” Mary grimaces and Peter winks at her
“No can do, baby doll”
“If you want to regain your dignity you could try beating her on a drinking game” Ursa suggest with a sly smug
“He’s a gigantic mammoth, how would that be fair?” Marlene frowns
“I can do it if you’re scared” Ursa flutters her lashes at her and Marlene snatches the vodka bottle by Ursa’s feet, the one next to Peter
“Okay, James grab a bottle” James does as Peter instructs
“Are they gonna end up with alcohol poisoning?” Regulus frowns at them
“se siamo fortunate” if we're lucky Ursa beams a wicked grin at the same time as Remus says “Probably”
“James, you’ll drown the few remaining—what do you call them? Gehirnzellen?” Regulus turns to his sister
“Gehirn… brain, zellen… cells. Brain cells”
“Why do you know what brain cells are and why do you have to translate it into English?” Lily wonders, fascinated by their lingual display
“I learnt what they were in German, so it’s kind of stuck in my brain in that language”
“Alright” Peter snaps them back to attention by clapping his hands “When I say go,” he stares at James and Marlene, the only two idiots moronic enough to be convinced into doing this. That’s a lie. Sirius would probably do it too. And Ursa, so long as she cheats “you both start chugging, okay? The last one to put down the bottle or the first one to finish it wins, alright?” they nod along and for some grizzly human reason James flexes. It apparently means that he’s ready. They measure that both bottles have the same amount of liquid, only the last quarter of the way because Gryffindors and her twin are no fun and don’t want them to die of alcohol poisoning “Ready?” they raise their bottles “Set.” they press it to their lips “GO!” The bottles tilt up and off they go, the race starts. Chugging they go. James' eyes widen as he watches Marlene absolutely devour the bottle like a beast, like it doesn’t even burn her in the slightest.
“Come on James!” Sirius urges him “Go James”
“Kick his arse Marls!”
“Yeah! You go Marlene!”
Marlene takes the last sip out of her bottle and holds it upside down to prove it’s empty while James chokes on his vodka. The girls erupt in cheers and Mary holds her victorious hand up in the air. Marlene meets Ursa’s eye and she winks at her. She just chugged Ursa’s bottle, water instead of vodka. Remus pats James’ back as he coughs himself to tears
“That was pathetic, James!” Mary blasts and Lily hides a giggle
“She wiped the floor with you”
“Utterly humiliated you” Regulus agrees
“Reg!” James whines, sounding so adorable that Regulus can’t help the smile that twitches on his lips.
“Idiot” He presses a sweet kiss to his temple
“Alright, I gotta come clean” Marlene sighs. Ursa’s eyes shoot up to her and she pouts at her “sorry” Marlene laughs at her with a smile “mine had water instead of Vodka”
“Boo, you Gryffindors are no fun” Ursa ties back the last bit of Peter’s braid
“It’s called honor, nothing you Slytherins would know about”
“Yeah, we know about it, we just call it being a loser” she taunts
“Ursa, stop cheeeaaatiiinnng!” James whines like a baby stomping his feet as he throws up a clear liquid and Regulus get him a water bottle to sip on
“Stop making it so easy!” she snaps back but without venom in her words, no matter how much she’d love for them to drip with it.
“When did you even switch it to water?” Remus frowns at her
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Ursa winks at the boy with a hairy little secret that unlike his friends, it isn’t puberty
“That’s literally why he asked”
“Lame-culos” Kiss-arse she narrows her eyes on her twin, brandishing him with a middle finger
“Only one” he smirks, smug. He holds her eyes as she tilts her head to the side with a laugh tugging at the corner of her lips
“Hello? I’m here too, remember? You’re my baby brother and I know enough italian to put two and two together, I know what culo means. Unfortunately.”
“It was Spanish” Ursa and Regulus correct in the same breath
“I hate my life” Sirius sighs into his hands
“You say that like it’s news” Regulus frowns at him. Remus muffles his snort with a cough. Sirius still catches it with a grumpy glare.
“Don’t worry,” she bats her big, long lashes at her brother, her voice soft and sweet “ce est pas le cul qu’il voulait dire” that’s not the arse he meant. The twins chuckle and their older sibling chucks an empty bottle at them
All eyes on me in the center of the ring just like a circus
When I crack that whip everybody gon' trip just like a circus
Don't stand there watching me, follow me, show me what you can do
Everybody let go, we can make a dance floor just like a circus