That Split Second | D.M

There was nothing on this earth that I had yearned for as much as holding her whilst she slept again, fingers raking soft strands of hair, counting every little speck of uniqueness that blanketed her skin, so much more intricate when my view was so close to her this way. 

Never on a normal occasion would she submit in all her vulnerability, but her sickness had her unable to deny herself of the warm comfort. And the fact that she had searched for it in me gave an overwhelming sense of belonging. 

I'm actually someone's person, the one they unravelled all of their soul to with an innate trust that I could bring safety and peace; I was important to her for something much deeper than wealth, status, popularity or image.

I then vowed to protect this girl for as long as I was able, the same girl who mere months ago I despised the sight of simply because she saw me, not just Draco Malfoy; she saw DRacO maLFoY, whoever that may be. That I am still learning, because it surely is me, and it was her who had helped bring me to realise it. Y/n's entire self was prickly and obtuse, unpredictable and as ferociously honest and brutal in who she was as anyone else could only wish to be.

She wasn't even remotely close to my type at all, or at least what I had deceived myself in to believing. Foolishly I had been my own destruction, hearing the call of complete oblivion roaring from inside of her and jumping into the pit blindly with no escape route. She swallowed me whole and now I've taken up camp inside her ribcage, right next to her heart where there is only warmth and a promise of a future that would never be steady or normal, but absolutely worth forfeiting my fortune and place in high society.

Dare I say it, I may even be open to immersing myself in a magicless culture and ultimately way of life, especially if things pan out like The Dark Lord intends. The split second that the war is won and Potter is slain, I'm getting so far away from it all that the only evidence I existed is testimonies of people who knew me, but would never see me again.

Makes sense, since I managed to lose my friends for a second time. And I love my parents, I really do contrary to common misconception. But their way of life will never be fulfilling to me anymore, I want something bigger and better now, realising that I had been living in complete monotone until I lived life in colour for the first time at the grace of y/n. 

Would a blind man fall for Medusa because he could not see her scars and crown of serpents?

 Maybe, but then there's the man who would see Medusa as she is and fall for her anyway because he understands her anger. Y/n tries to cover the scars of her past by rebelling against anything that attempts to open them up, the crown she wears made of many things I'll never fully understand, but the mellowing pit of anger she's stowed away for safe keeping is something I both understand and admire. 

So yeah, perhaps I am just pathetically seeking out a safe haven in something that cannot be tarnished by who I am destined to become; the draw of it is simply something I can't turn away from. She's what makes this miserable world tolerable, because I'm not the person everybody thinks that I am. 

I'm something far less impressive. I'm just me, and she's okay with that, making it easier for me to be okay with it too.

Y/n's soft exhales and every so often readjustments that had her crawling her way deeper into my embrace were exactly what had my heartbeat dim to a relaxing beat. And we both melted into a sleep, twisted together like a Taijitu. 

It was only the unmistakeable aroma of bitter coffee and a vague instinct of being watched that had me stir awake, lids fluttering open whilst still in a heavy inertia. At first I didn't even notice my surroundings, barely registering the sight of y/n still curled up next to me but facing in at the wall.

Then like a thread snapping, my eyes darted to her bedroom door to realise the strong smell of coffee was coming from the mug in Ruth's hand, who stood with an arched brow and a blatant expression of impending lecture on her face.

From the shock I flailed myself, forgetting that this was indeed a single bed and planted the carpeted floor quite gracefully if I do say so myself. Y/n never stirred once, her body deep in a dreamworld as it attempted to heal itself from her ailment. And all twisted in a knot, I had no excuse, I was told to not be here in the morning yet here I was; snuggled up like I lived under this roof in a bed with the daughter of the woman now looking down at me with half amusement, and half second hand embarrassment.

"Good morning, Mr Friend." Ruth spoke both calmly and quietly, but in a tone that had me know my brazen presence was surprising and unexpected; even if there was a hint of teasing amusement there too. "Oh I'm sorry, did I interrupt your slumber, hm? You looked awfully comfortable I will admit."

"I am so, so, sorry," I whispered, trying to look as pathetically innocent as I was able. "I'll leave right away. I didn't mean to doze off, honestly. I only meant to make sure y/n had managed to get to sleep and then I was going to sneak out."

Awkwardly getting to my feet I straightened myself out, only making myself look all the more flustered and disorderly in the process. "Ah-ah, I don't think so Mr Friend," Ruth implored. "If you just abscond from my daughter right now when she's sleeping so well for the first time in months, somehow thanks to you, then I might not be as bizarrely charmed by finding you cosied up in bed with her."

Oh, had I miraculously done something right, albeit unintentional?  

"Um, okay? Am I in trouble though?" I sheepishly queried, fidgeting and bashful like a kid who'd just been caught red handed stealing cookies from the jar after being told no. 

"Well, you're still fully clothed and weren't beneath the blankets. So I'll give you points for chivalry. Come on, downstairs with me; I'll make you some breakfast and then you can tell me who the bloody hell you are before I need to lay down for work tonight."

Merlin strike me down right now, my first ceremonial 'meet the parents,' and I am not in any way prepared and don't have y/n awake and lucid to try and guide me. I was practically at the mercy of this plucky spirited woman who from just energy alone seemed to be as quirky as y/n. Yet I was in no position to decline her, technically I'd already made myself at home with ease. "Okay Mrs Selwyn. Should I leave y/n sleeping?"

"Yes," she smiled, admiring her little girl and nodded before gesturing me out and to follow her. "She needs it, and I promise I won't lambast you too much in her absence. I'm sure she'll come down when she's ready. And please, call me Ruth, I don't use that name anymore."

I followed Ruth down the stairs of the charming little cottage, the crack of dawn starting to filter through the windows and bitter scent of coffee grew more intense as we waded over to the rounded oak table saddled near the corner of the living area. 

The curly haired woman didn't look much different to the pictures that hung on the walls, maybe a few laughter lines had etched into her complexion with age but she hadn't seemed to have grown in height; a tiny little 5ft thing compared to me.

"Juice, milk, tea or water?" She called back from her rattling in the kitchen. "Water, please?"

Who the fuck chooses water? Moron.

Yet still I received it with a grateful smile that hid the fact I was a nervous wreck on the inside, my anxious bouncing of my leg wouldn't go unnoticed though and only amused Ruth to a higher degree. Aptly she returned, water and muffin in hand. Homemade too, she'll have a hell of a job to kick me out at this rate, the woman is a baker extraordinaire. 

Whereas my mum is an alright cook, but her baking leaves a lot to be desired. Often unrisen or burnt at the bottom, she completely botched my ninth birthday cake. Father of course lied through his teeth and professed it as a delicacy whilst trying to hold back the urge to squirm every time he chewed through another raw mouthful. The man hasn't touched a piece of cake since.

Ruth saddled herself down with a wicked smirk, yet she swallowed it away, trying to enter concerned parent mode but wasn't fooling anybody. If I had to describe her to anyone it would be one singular word, wholesome. Empath sort of person, you know, but with a wit as sharp as the girl she raised single handed.

"So shall we start with names then? Mr Friend?" I hesitated at first, I knew that my name would be foreign to her, it's a very specifically picked 'pureblood' name, so would sound just like a mishmash of random letters to any semi-intelligent muggle. "Uh, Draco Malfoy."

"And where is Draco Malfoy from then?" The name debacle seemed to have passed by without a hitch. "Wiltshire too, about thirty minutes in the air."

"The air?" 

"Oh, maybe forty by road, then, I think." I had already resorted to mumbling, the whole confident façade left firmly behind at the Parkinson's. Now I had to lie again though, and actually pull it off this time. "My family has a farm, it's quite rural so it's out of the way." Totally not a centuries old Manor, where a bunch of death eaters congregate to casually plan out mass attacks and genocide like it's a book club. "We breed chickens."

I never know when to fucking stop. Good lord.

"Oh, I grew up on a farm too. Which breeds do you roost?" It was an all too serious question, for which I had no answer to. Matter of fact, I don't think I've ever seen a chicken that wasn't already cooked and on a plate in front of me. Fuck. "The one's with feathers."

The silence told me what I needed to know, I was messing this up spectacularly. It's astounding that my family wishes for me to ever carry on the business that comes with the family name, I'm not savvy, I don't know how to call someone's bluff. Look at me, I can't even behave normally around my girlfriend's mother. Okay, okay, shake it off, Malfoy, Slytherin, I got this.

"We roost rare breeds, also pheasants too.. and peacocks." Ah, at last! Something I knew a dime about, saved. "My parents favour white peafowl, for their rarity, but my personal favourites are the Indian blues. Stunning creatures."

Ruth was impressed, a subtle nod and smile confirmed it; I've never been so relieved. Picking at the muffin and water was a lot easier now I wasn't shifting in the chair and picking my lips in anxiety. I'd also impressed myself too, giving fire to the cocky part of my ego. "So I'm correct in assuming that you have powers, magic, whatever you call it too? Like y/n?"

"Yes," I nodded, the fact that I'm the magical equivalent to royalty wasn't going to earn me any points here though. "It's all I've ever known, my family is all magic or as far as I know anyway. I'm sure there'll be some disputes somewhere, but I don't mind, not really."

  The marbled mug of coffee in Ruth's hand had cooled now, leaving only an inch of tepid liquid inside. I could tell she wanted to ask me more, but I could also feel her analysing me in other ways, studying my posture, observing the jewellery on my hands. She was far from content with the little she had extracted from me this morning, and I would without a doubt be grilled again in good time. "Okay, Mr Friend Draco. Are your parents aware of where you are?"

"Of course." I mumbled, still frozen in place. "They're pretty lenient with me, I'm an only child as well so I can get away with quite a bit. My dad is always away working and my mum attends social events regularly. Plus with being away at Hogwarts most months they're just sort of used to me not being around much."

"Alright, well I have to go lay down so I'm able to work tonight. Help yourself to anything from the kitchen, and you have free reign of the house within reason. My bedroom is up in the loft, but still try to be quite please. I have it in good faith that you can be trusted in my home and with my daughter?"

"Yes, definitely. Thanks for.. this." I gave the muffin a feeble shake, and watched her tiredly tread away from me and hang up some bits and bobs on a coat rack, before disappearing up some stairs. I had a weird feeling about y/n's mother, something I couldn't quite put my finger on. Not a bad feeling, but an instinct nonetheless. A bit like she already knows some things about me, but is keeping it to herself for the time being. 

Once the footsteps had ceased, I took my opportunity of sneaking back up to y/n's bedroom. Being in her home unsupervised felt a bit weird. She was spread out full eagle now, arms and legs star fished, she didn't look like the tired little angel she had the night before but more so like a deranged hedge goblin. I felt so oddly welcome here already, and it conflicted with my longing for my own home and parents. I'd not ever envisioned a day where I could think of nothing worse than being there, so y/n's quite lucky in a way.

And she yawned and stretched out a little as a laid beside her again, tickling the skin of her face lightly to rouse her from stupor. My hands were beginning to shake and tremble a little, I needed morphine to stave off the withdrawal, but it'll have to wait. "Mhm, mh? Mhm?" She grumbled in confusion before her nose scrunched up from the feel of me poking and prodding at it. "Don't forget the pie on the twelfth, if we don't bring it then I'm gonna lose my job."

"Okay, we'll have to remember then won't we?" I whispered, holding back my amusement. Slowly she opened her eyes one by one, pulling her head back to focus her vision in on me properly. "You're not my assistant?"

"I can be if you want, how much you going to pay me though?" A few minutes of pure, utter confusion passed before her brain realised the dream was over and the prettiest little smirk of embarrassment cut across her face, followed by a groan and pulling a pillow over her head to hide the fact she was mortified that I'd witnessed the sleep talking. "What pie do we need to get? Do they want custard? Cream? I need more details because we can't have you jobless, how will we survive!?"

"Draco, shut the fuck up. What are you even doing in my house?" She wined, sleepily. Then, y/n sat bolt upright, looking shaken to her core. "My mum? She'll be back soon you can't be h-"

"She already gave me breakfast and then went to bed, chill your fucking tits." That just sent the fear of Merlin through her tenfold. The idea of me conversing with Ruth unaided seemed like a treacherous idea to y/n, for what reason though, I've no clue. "She gave you breakfast?" Yes,  I nodded. "And she was cool with you, like, she likes you yeah?" Yes, I nodded again even as y/n remained aghast at the whole escapade. "Oh, well, that's good then and also quite rare."

"What about it is rare, is she usually terrifying or something?"

"No. But she's just fussy about friends and such. Overprotective, understandably. Does she know that you stayed over in bed with me?" Yes, I nodded again and added a subtle tut. "Apparently me being fully clothed and not beneath the covers was charming and chivalrous. She'd made muffins."

"Oooooh muffins, nice. What flavour? She probably made them on break at work." Casting my mind back to the taste of the sugary goods, I recalled a few white chocolate chips. "White chocolate I think, was amazing honestly. I've decided I'm moving in, I'll live in your cupboard."

"What and pull a Potter? Good luck with that." She never misses, and it's hilarious every single time. She did seemed a little more alert now, however, her shoving herself nose deep into my hoodie again signalled that she wasn't quite ready to emerge from her little fort of sympathy and attention. Perfectly fine by me too. 

"What is it with your obsession with smelling me?" I asked, biting back a breathy laugh. Y/n's words came out completely muffled, the vibrations of her voice against my scars were strangely calming. It reminded me that I still had sense of feeling on that part of my body. "You smell sooo nice, ugh it should be illegal. I just wanna sniff you all time tiiiiime."

"Well it was you that made the aftershave, so I'd like to think so." Pulling her head back from the embrace, our eyes met. With a drowsy smile, y/n seemed enchanted by the idea that I genuinely did like it and wasn't just saying that to get into her knickers. "You actually use it?"

"Yes, obviously. If you didn't think I'd use it why make it for me?" Granted it wasn't my absolute number one favourite of all time but it was definitely decent. "Oh I just didn't expect you to. That's quite sweet actually, n'aww. You're so fucking whipped."

The sweet words and lovely dovey disposition never last very long with her, always following up with a little attitude. Not that I'd have it any other way of course. I had wondered once though what it might be like to actually be whipped, but realising the contrast I had made I pushed the thought aside. Me? At the mercy of a whip in the hand of a girl, nah, I could never thrive in that kind of power dynamic. I'm definitely far too proud for that sort of thing.

But whipping a girl? Hm, a nubile thought in itself, but if that girl were to be y/n I doubt I'd enjoy inflicting pain in any manner, under any circumstance. Even if she wanted it from me, in the proper setting, I really don't know if I could enjoy that. I don't ever want to hurt her beautiful body that carries her mind around safely. It's far more deserving of worship.

"How are you feeling now?" I queried, hopeful that she would be in no more pain. I wanted to be the one who took it all away, the reason she feels better. I wished to heal her however I could because during recent events I had become closely acquainted with extreme pain and it was awful. "Yeah I'm okay now, I think it was from practice," she said. " Plus I really needed that sleep. And I really needed to be held too, I liked you tickling my back it was so relaxing."

"I know, it's one of my favourite things as well. Tickle my back and I'm off to sleep in minutes, it was the only way my mother could settle me when I was little and feeling restless or unwell." If my cheeks had turned cherry red then I wouldn't of noticed. Y/n seemed charmed by the thought though. "That's actually so cute. I always got the vibes that you were the kind of family that all hated each other. Your dad especially, he's spooky as shit."

"Eh, firstly my dad is not spooky he just acts like it. Secondly, no. We're just as close as you are to your mum. We just have a certain way to present ourselves out in public. And by the way don't change the topic.. practice for what?"

"He literally is, absolutely so fucking creepy. When he was on the school board and I'd see him around the dude literally gave me shivers. And, skating, I've told you this. I used to compete but had to give up when I started at Hogwarts because I'd be away studying. But even though I don't compete anymore I still enjoy doing it. I feel so free on the ice."

"You've told me this?" I had to make sure, I mean my attention span has been cut dramatically lately. "Yes Draco, more than once. It's so good to know that you listen to a single word I'm saying when I've got my clothes on," she said sarcastically, dismissing my inattentiveness. "I'll show you if you want? There's loads of VHS footage of me competing, I can put it on our TV."

I accepted out of obligation, and to make up for the fact that I'd been entirely oblivious to it. Y/n hopped herself up on to the bed but caught her foot trying to step down from the bottom end and face planted the door, before then also face planting the floor. I waited propped up on my elbows, ready to hear speedy curse words or a sob of pain. 

My y/n just got herself up, brushed herself down, patted the door and apologised and then wandered off in search of muffins and VHS tapes. I'm in love with a girl who apologises to doors when she walks into them. I had to actually repeat that in my head a few times to get used to it, my girlfriend apologises to inanimate objects. Righto.

As soon as the coast was clear I darted for my rucksack and yanked out the vial of Morphine; quickly taking a dose and stuffing it away for safe keeping. The cravings disappeared instantly and the tremors were quick to remedy themselves too. Kiki and her beady, suspicious little cross eyes had watched me in my indignity and I still couldn't be sure she wasn't a Metamorphmagus. 

"Keep your beak shut, you hear me?" I muttered, unaware of the fact I had began to talk to animals as if they could understand me. "And stop teaching Ulysses to be a moron."

I had no idea owls could give you a disapproving look, but I swore this one did. Even Kiki knew I was slowly losing it, before long her and I would be on the same wave length if I continued to pour opiates down my throat at the rate I was. A sharp whistle echoed up the stairs as a calling to go down and join y/n, so I inched out of the room still staring down her owl.

And arriving at the room I had earlier been in, I found y/n sat on a rug in front of one of those muggle picture screen things looking slightly excited. I just joined beside her, letting her lean into me as we melted back up against the foot of the couch. "So, you're going to show me you trying to win a figure skating competition then?"

"No," she smirked. "I'm going to show you me winning one. I don't try to win, I do win."

Maybe it's the narcissist in me, but I loved that sentence. I don't try to win, I do win. That was so attractive of her to say. If I could fuck her for it right here, right now, I would. Stolen from my dirty thoughts, I was a little unnerved by her next admission. "Oh, and if you're staying then be aware that we're going to a rave tonight."

"A what?"

"An illegal rave," y/n replied, looking to me. "In a disused warehouse in the country. Like a party but with roughly a hundred people, and loud dance music, drugs and well whatever goes.. you know?"

"You literally just said it's illegal?!" I had to keep my voice down to a personal level for fear of pissing off Ruth and ruining y/n's plans. I don't know what shifted in her aura but I sensed it. 

"Yeah so what? We can just apparate out of there if anything happens, everyone else maybe not but that's on them for being muggles. I'm not wasting an invite." She shrugged, the glint in her eye growing brighter by the minute. "So illegal party with muggles just so we're clear?"

"Yes Malfar, moogles, iwegal, wery scawy." My palm hit my face, nothing irritates me like her not saying my name properly but to be fair I did just walk into that one with my pants down. "Ha-ha, whatever so hilarious. Come on then let's see you slide about on some ice then."

"Accio muffins!" She flicked her wand and sent about four muffins flying through the air, only catching two of them and having the other two falls to bits all around her lap. If her precision for catching flying objects is anything to go by then I don't have much hope for her skating, never mind the fact the girl almost gave herself a bleed on the brain just trying to leave her own bedroom. 

"Hm, simply slide around on ice huh? Oh dear boy, you're about to learn a valuable lesson today. Don't underestimate the kind of power I can exude whilst sliding about on some ice." Between her morning voice, choice wording and self-confidence, I was silently pining for her so pathetically. Quite frankly I just wanted to bury my cock inside of her, I'm sure we'll find time for that at some point later.

"Go on then," I whispered as a tease, planting a kiss against her neck. "You eat your muffin, then make me eat my words darling.