Cherry kisses n' future pictures
Wednesday 5th of July 1899
/AD/
I woke up with a lump in my throat and burning eyes. Oh, I cried. This always happened to me when I fell asleep during or shortly after crying. I did not like that about myself.
I stretched my hand a little in front of me; I immediately closed my eyes because the burning was unbearable. "Gellert?" I addressed my companion - if he had not gone away during the night, he must have been here. The sun was just rising and he was used to getting up later than I did. Instead of an answer, I got only a grunt and so I had to turn around and open my eyes at least a little.
He was lying there, still, uncovered, with a slight smile on his face. Did he dream something? Were they nice dreams? I moved slightly closer and rubbed my eyes hoping they would stop burning. However, my sweaty hands made it even worse. I blinked and propped myself up on my elbow, looking at my friend. His blonde locks flowed onto his pillow, almost as light as his skin. His handsome and sharply cut face kept smiling ever so slightly, and that made me smile too. I moved a little closer again, but carefully - I did not want to wake him, not...yet. With a slight smile on my face, I approached him and gave him a quick kiss on his lips. However, I immediately recoiled - what if he meant it yesterday when he said we can’t do that... He sure meant it! I moved away again to my half and decided to turn to the other side, pretending to be asleep. However, now I wanted him to wake up. Carefully sliding my hand out from under the covers, I reached for my wand and quietly opened the window - then quickly used another incantation, letting the window crack loudly as it slammed shut. I quickly placed my wand on the bedside table and again pretended to be asleep and nothing woke me up.
"Damn it…," I heard Gellert curse, sitting up on the bed in arousal. He probably then turned to me, I had the feeling that someone was looking at me. Then, with all the hope and pleas, I was disappointed again. He did not kiss me, caress me, or try to wake me up gently. Instead, he slammed back into his pillow and sighed, probably about to go to sleep.
You scoundrel, I cursed to myself and pretended to wake up. "Uh, what was that slam? Hmm, Gellert?" I poked him with my finger. He wiggled and sat down again.
"The window. I thought you were sleeping," he said, his cheeks turning pink. I shook my head and got out of bed.
"There's a second bathroom downstairs if you need…" I motioned to him and went to mine where I quickly washed and dressed. I felt strange like I was not awake all the time.
When I returned from the bathroom, Gellert was standing in front of my mirror, putting on a black shirt over his tank top. I entered the room without knocking, so he turned sharply on me, and I saw the white skin around his shoulders and collarbones.
"I-I'm sorry,-" I stammered, looking away, "I didn't know that…"
"It's okay though," he just smiled at me and quickly buttoned up all the buttons before taking his vest over his shirt. I gulped and sat on the bed, watching him adjust his sleeves.
"So…" I cleared my throat as he got dressed and fixed his hair, "I want to apologize for what happened yesterday. I was awful and childish. You had to catch me on the sidewalk and everything in front of the whole village. I'm sorry, it was..."
"Legitimate," he finished for me and stood up. I watched with surprise as he walked up to me and... He lifted my chin with his index finger, forcing me to look into his eyes. I swallowed again and unintentionally licked my lower lip. It was dry as dirt, I could not help it. However, he probably saw it from the other side.
He leaned down, his finger still supporting my chin, and kissed me carefully. I did not know why, but I just could not control myself as well as I wanted to in his presence. I moaned a little, I could not help it. Feeling a million butterflies in my stomach, I stood on tiptoes and returned the kiss, perhaps a little too eagerly. He noticed and I expected him to push me away again, but this time he did not. He pulled me closer to him by my waist, also sighed lightly into the kiss and ran his tongue over my lower lip. I did not know if I was ready for this, maybe it scared me a little. I swallowed and tried to soften the kiss, but for a moment, it felt like we were fighting over whether or not to let his tongue into my mouth. I fought back and he tried to get in, even his hands went a little lower below my waist. I had to moan again, but I did not let his tongue inside.
So he stopped competing with me, I felt him smile and finish the kiss slowly. He was holding my shoulders now; I had my hands wrapped around his neck. I felt how completely red and taken aback I was, I wanted to cling to him and not let him go or run far away so that he would never find me again. I was quite embarrassed, but it was not such a bad feeling. I buried myself into his chest with a slightly suppressed smile.
"Oh Albus…," he just breathed out and pressed me a little awkwardly to himself. It was awkward because so far, I have realised he is not a good hugger. Or he was not used to be, that does not matter, but still – it was not that nice and comforting hug you would be expecting from a friend. Alternatively, someone who is something slightly more than a friend is. However, I hugged him back, tightly, nuzzling against his chest and body, trying to squeeze some emotions out of him. I have received just a sight.
“You should have told me sooner, Al…,” He started, loosening the hug, “you should have told me you feel this way. Maybe I would not… take you as a try,” he finished, hanging his head down. I raised my eyebrows, confused at first and madly the second.
'“A t-try?” I asked carefully, hiding a gulp. “How do you mean it, I was your… try?” It physically hurt me to say that aloud, but there was no other way to pass everything further. He gulped instead of me, taking my cheeks to his soft, long spidery hands.
“Look, please don’t you think it all mattered nothing for me – it is not like that. It did, it mattered so much to me so much. But at first, I have kissed you because… because…”
“Because of what, Gellert?” I was getting slightly angry with him. Was I just his experiment? Was that all about just a single try? He stuttered at first, then forced some words out of himself. I was suddenly so sorry for him and slapped myself in my head. I had no right to be so rude to him.
“Because your lips fascinated me and I… Albus, I could not help myself, I just wanted to taste them so badly… And so I have done that without thinking, I needed to feel them on mines…”
I had to smile. In addition, it was an honest smile. I stroked gently and calmingly his arm. “Gellert, that’s alright. I understand. You wanted to be sure if…” A sudden gulp came through my throat, choking me a bit, so I had to chuckle. “It is really fine, Gellert. I do understand now. It just kind of freaked me out when you said I was just a try. You know, I thought… I thought you wanted to make a fool out of me. But it was not like that, it is not this way, right?” I do not know why I needed to be so sure about all of this. About his feelings towards me, I have never cared if anyone loved me at school. I have never cared about my possible crushes or anything like that. I did not care, I have always left it be and called it destiny when it did not work out. However, this boy was my destiny, too, yet I cared.
“I am glad you understand, then…,” he said after a moment of silence when we were just lightly hugging. Well, more likely, he was learning how to hug. I smiled, looking up into his eyes.
“Does that mean that…? You know, that…” I hoped he will understand and finish the sentence for me, but he was clearly cold and dumb in this way.
“That?” he asked, raising his brows, misunderstanding me, “I mean, we are still friends, aren’t we?” And then he smirked – after leaving me in shock with a wide mouth opened. He literally smiled and grinned, after me thinking he was serious.
Out of a sudden, I felt Gellert’s hands on my waist again, lifting me gently up, sitting me on the desk in my room. I felt as if I could fly.
I could almost feel my pupils dilate as I felt the cold wood of my desk beneath me and his hands a little lower on my waist, just above my hips. I swallowed again, looking straight into his eyes, my lips trembling. I wanted to say something, but I did not get the chance. His lips were on mine’s again, gently rubbing against, before he started kissing me. I felt like in heaven, but also completely out of the world and dazed. I did not know what caused it because I had to focus on the kiss – to prevent him from giving me a proper tongue French kiss. I really did not feel if I was ready, and I could not decide either – while not kissing him, I knew it was too early for me – but on the other hand, while kissing him, I wanted so much more – I wanted to feel him, to touch him, kiss him more, deeper and deeper. But I also could not suppress the feeling of sickness, twisted mind and obliquity. I heard voices in my head, telling me it was simply not right, that it was wrong. However, it did not feel wrong at all, it felt natural; I did not have to pretend I like it; I did not have to –
And then it hit me. I have kissed some girls at school back then, just a few, before I unsuccessfully tried to kiss my best friend when I was drunk. Yeah, even things like that were happening at Hogwarts, don’t you think. However, it has always felt… Forced. Somehow unnatural, weird and hard for me to even do that. I always felt like I will throw up, like if I did something that caused huge pain to my heart and soul. When I first told my friend, he just told me I am with my books so often that even girls are making me sick. We laughed about it, but it has made me nervous and I have never stopped searching for some valid reason and explanation.
However, it seemed like my explanation was standing right there in front of me now. Gellert pushed me more onto the table, making me moan unintentionally. I squeaked right after, making it all worse and blushing so hard. I felt how my cheeks were burning; I knew I was a tomato. However, there was nothing I could help myself from this inconvenience. Well, it was not so bad, not at all, but I felt bad because I did not know if my kisses are good enough for my friend. Friend… Hm.
“A-Albus…,” he stuttered out of sudden, breaking the kiss and taking a deep breath. I did not even realise I was not breathing for a while. I did not care. I wanted his lips back on mine, I wanted the kiss never ends.
“Y-yeah?” I replied with a shaky voice, having to hold onto his shoulders now. He made almost a longing sight when not kissing me. I did not know he liked that back.
“I don’t know if we should, Albus… I do not know if it is right… I like you, I really do, I care about you so much, but… this? Are you sure about it?” His doubts made me somewhat insecure and I pushed myself slightly away, at least as much as it was possible and took a deep breath, shrugging.
“I don’t know either. Do I have to? Do we have to know it?” I tried to pull him back closer again because his hot breath so close to my face was literally driving me crazy. “I know we are geniuses… But do we really have to know everything?” I asked with a slight smirk, rubbing against his lips. I felt his hands becoming a bit unsteady and gently caressed his cheek. “Look, if you don’t feel like doing it, we don’t-“
“It is not about that. I do feel like doing it. But…” He removed my hand from his cheek, leaning his forehead against mine. “But I don’t want to hurt you. And I am really far away from what you want, from what you deserve and are longing for. I simply don’t think I am your type, Albus…”
“Shush!” I slapped him playfully and gently, more like another caressing. “How can you know who is my type when you have never asked? Well?” I winked at him playfully, leaning back and holding myself on my elbows, staring in front of myself at him. Gellert sat on the desk next to me, looking over his shoulder to see my face.
“Well…,” his tone became mischievous suddenly, “what is your type then, Albus Dumbledore?” He leaned closer to me, picking up a bloom from the tree behind my window – it was really growing in – and tucked it into my auburn hair. You can imagine the heat wave that came over me when he touched my hair and cheek. I gulped, shrugging at first, and then deciding to join his mischievous game.
“Well, you know… A foreigner, from far away… A European accent is a need, so unfortunately Americans are big no for me… Hmm, I also do love blonde hair. I think blond, mid-length locks would perfectly fit with my brown hair, oh and, also, blue eyes… Blue eyes, because I hate those mines and I want to love some when I cannot do those mines. Someone a little bit taller than me would be a perfect fit, because…” I had to blush now, and Gellert laughed, caressing my cheek the whole time.
“Would someone with a stupid name meet the requirements?” he asked and I gasped.
“You don’t have a stupid name!”
“Who was talking about me, eh?” His grins, giggles and laughs were making my day so much better.
“Maybe I did?”
“So I am your type, after all… Hm, interesting, I thought you wanted a best friend…?” He leaned closer, making my breath shaky. “Well, I suppose you have just ruined your perfect friendship, Albus Dumbledore… Is there something you are going to do about it?” He provoked me and made my vocabulary so limited so far.
“I- Uhm, I guess I won’t…” I leaned closer, too, our lips almost touching again. I did not perceive how uncomfortable the table must have been.
“Oh, well… What a friend you are, Albus…”
“A good one, right…” We were almost whispering to each other, studying the other one’s lips and eyes and when he bit his bottom lip, I could not hold myself back anymore. Or wasn’t it him who made the first step?
Under the cherry tree on my wooden large table, we kissed for the fourth time. I am not counting that one kiss after which I have run away because that time Gellert was not kissing me back. However, this was our fourth proper kiss. Well, I was still not sure about the tongue thing, but Gellert of course had to try. He lied me down, fully, on the table, himself holding onto the cherry tree in my window. He stroked gently my whole body, over my waist to my hips – then I shivered, and he genuinely stopped with a mischievous smile to the kiss. He put the hand away, next to my head, now leaning his body closer to my chest, so he could definitely feel my heartbeat.
My hand, by itself, of course, wandered over his back to his hair, bringing me another wave of shiver – I wanted to touch his hair since the first time I saw him and this dream coming true was such a comforting song for my heart. The moment was full of unintentional moans and bites on each other’s lips, as each of us wanted something else – he wanted it roughly, with desire and passion, however, I felt the romance and softness.
It was a quite long and persistent fight until we both agreed on the no-tongue-yet-passionate kiss and light touches over my arms. I did not feel the need to touch his body constantly, but he obviously has slightly different intentions; not that I would be against it, but I did not want to rush it and so I kept him in a slow tempo, always rejecting his tongue and not letting its inch to my mouth.
No, really, I felt it was too early. I did not want him to have me all at once. I wanted him to explore me slowly, seducing me with his smiles and touches over my chin and elegant movements. I loved that, I loved his spidery hands, his smiles and laugh, his grins and giggles. I loved his soft locks and blue eyes, his pale skin and black clothes. And at that moment I realised I loved him, fully, with all his future mistakes.
And that was the heaviest weight I ever had.
/GG/
I did not know if I should feel right or wrong. I did not even perceive how did it feel in general – as I have already said, all my previous kisses were out of politeness and I had zero feelings for them in the past. That was probably why this was confusing me so much; it caused a few butterflies in my belly, some shivers and goosebumps over my skin and made my mind explode. The feeling was unknown, completely new and came to me as a slap.
I laid the auburn boy down on his table, grabbing the cherry tree above me to keep up the balance. I let my hands wander over his body, naturally, as I had closed my eyes, I was not ever perceiving he was a boy. Not that it was something banned for me, but it felt just… New.
If it was right? I do not know. I just felt confused; hoping another kiss and touch will bring some light to this case.
Albus was pulling me closer by my hair, forcing me to keep up the kiss – and after a while, it stopped being so unnatural and new and became… Normal. I stroked his shivering body, letting him slow down the kiss and again tried to get my tongue inside of his mouth. Why was that such a problem for him, I had no idea, but I had to give up when realised he just will not let me. Heh, do not worry Albus. I will find my way, eventually.
As we kissed, even if it was just two minutes, I managed to think about so many things and fantasies. I had no idea what was he thinking about, but my mind instantly, without a chance to control, wandered to the most perverted, dark and degenerated thoughts. Suddenly an image of him, being a little less dressed, a little needier for my kisses, hit my mind. Maybe he was even a bit horny? The pure, innocent and ambitious genius being naughty. And since then, since I saw it in my head, I knew I needed that, no matter what. My twisted mind forced me to do such things. I swear I could not control that, I saw things I did not invent or thought about.
And naked needy Albus was one of those visions.
/Abe/
I sighed, standing in front of my brother’s room. I was just about to knock when a cheerful light laugh came from inside. Therefore, they are awake. I shook my head in disbelief as listening to another laugh, belonging to my brother this time.
How dare you laugh these times? Don’t you know your mother died? Doesn’t it hurt you as it hurts me when I try to smile? Don’t you feel the pain and loss inside of your chest, you heartless ambitious bastard?!
I made a step closer to the door, looking around. Ari was probably still downstairs, having the breakfast I have prepared. I kneeled, with such a heavy feeling and darkness in my soul as I did it. I blinked a few times, letting my eyes get used to the light inside of the room, while I was staring through the keyhole.
Both boys, my brother and that scoundrel, were lying on the wooden desk under the opened window. I saw only their bent legs hanging down from the table and time to time a hand above, as they were probably talking about something surely extremely serious and important. Of course more important than was Ari or our family. I sighed, getting up and quietly making a step away before knocking on the door. I heard another laugh, then a hummed voice and giggles. What the hell were they doing?
“Albus! The hell, can’t you just open the f-“
“Good morning, Abe!” my brother almost fell on me as rushed out of the room with a bright annoying smile.
“Good. I just wanted to inform you that it’s nearly nine o'clock and Batty is about to bring us lunch. Don’t you think it's appropriate to… at least help me clean the house? I don’t think Batty cares about how many awards of writing you have,” I asked annoyed, by my brother, by the blonde bastard and by every single word I had to say. I couldn’t help and added a sarcastic comment.
Albus puffed himself up like a peacock, making himself taller by leaning against the door. “And who said I am about to show her my five writing awards? No one, Abe, so please, stop being jealous and go rather to your room. You still did not tell me how much homework you have got for the summer holiday, and-“
“By the Merlin, Albus, you are a fucking prick! Do you really think, at this time, that homework is the most important thing in my life?! It is not, maybe only to you, because you clearly care just about some stupid research, your grades, job appointments, fucking awards and brand new ties! You don’t even know what it takes, to take care of a family, huh? You are making a parent of yourself, but you are not, and you never will be, because you know what? Books and awards, even some stupid ties or this scoundrel, they do not need a parent! In addition, you do not care about Ari or me at all! Since our mother died, you did not even come to my room to check up if I am alright, if I am not having meltdowns! You don’t even-“
“Abe, that’s enough!” Albus interrupted me with a deep loud voice and I had to blink. He reminded me of our father by this. “You are having a meltdown right now and I do care! I really do! But I have to find a job, my darling little one, I have to make some money, because believe me or not, sooner or later we will run out of money our mother left here and then what, mhm? What are you going to do then, mhm? So yes, I do care about all these fucking things, as you have called them, because the better I am, the better job I can get! And for Merlin’s sake, you could not choose a better time for fighting with me!”
The last thing I saw before my brother rudely slammed the door in front of my nose, was an uninterested blonde boy, who looked almost bored by the whole fight we had. Nah, he really did not care. It was not their research, and so why should he care? How could be my brother so genial yet so stupid?
/AD/
After the most amazing kiss, I had in my life, Gellert and I remained lying on the table, staring at the ceiling and enjoying the silence. We were both excessively out of breath to talk, so I just grabbed his hand, squeezing it a little and turning my head towards him. He smirked, and smiled a bit coldly before stared talking about Deathly Hallows again. I wondered if he kept me in the same passion as those three objects. I was dying to know.
“…maybe a little too heavy to carry, I don’t know. I never figured it out. What about you?”
“Mhm?” I shook my head, blinking, waking up from my dreamland. He sighed with a smirk.
“Are you even listening to me?” he asked seriously, leaning against his elbow, but I could not bring myself up to a sane mind.
“No, no I don’t think so…” I had to giggle and gave him a gentle kiss on his cheek, pulling him closer. I could not tell if he was annoyed or just played it.
“Nevermind. Today is the day, Albus. We are getting to the grave, alright?” He laid himself back on his back, staring at the ceiling. Now it was me, who half sat up.
“I agree. Please, just don’t think I am not interested. It is just… You are dragging me off the way a bit. You know, distracting me,” I admitted with a slight blush. Gellert chucked.
“Oh really, I did not ever recognise…” I loved even his sarcasm. “I thought I was the reason you want to find those Hallows – I thought I am so annoying that you want to be a master of death and beat me,” he joked, but then became serious. “Tell me, Albus Dumbledore, what would you do if you were the master of death?” he asked and kicked me to my ankle lightly.
I had to admit it was a nice thought, nothing against me, almost possessing. Once it was in my head, I could not stop thinking about it. “Mhm,” I had to bury into my thoughts and dreams a bit, “I wouldn’t definitely… I think I would…” Then I realised I still did not tell Gellert about Ariana’s illness. Suddenly I felt as if I betrayed him and gulped hardly. Gellert turned his sight at me again.
“Mhm? Is that so hard for you? Don’t you have your dreams settled up in a row? No? I thought you will be the type, you know…”
“The type!” I yelled out of sudden and kicked his ankle back. “You did not tell me who your type, Gellert Grindelwald, is, so? Is it going to be a girl with raven hair?” I tried to joke. However, he realised, excessively soon. “You are. And you know that. Now you are my type. But tell me, why are you not answering my questions, hm?”
I breathed in, nervously, and then tried to play it cool. “Hmm, maybe I have some secret dirty wishes that I don’t want you to know?” It worked! Gellert laughed, a bit displaces. I had to laugh too, and breathed in, in a hope to say something more, when we both heard a knocking at my door.
“Oh, isn’t that…”
“Aberforth, yes, that’s going to be him,” I said sadly, kissed Gellert’s cheek and jumped out of the table to open up to my brother.