Pretty little talks
Tuesday 4th of July 1899
/GG/
It was not fair. I came here to search for the Deathly Hallows, and instead of doing proper research, I was befriending Dumbledore’s boy… Phew! It has to stop, I cannot continue like this, or I will never ever finish my work and… However, he wanted to help me. He was bored - basically all alone and pissed by every move and word his brother did. Albus is, after all, such a smart and intelligent boy, and his family is drowning the intelligence, trying to take it away from him. And yes, I do think Albus deserves at least one happy summer before I – or we – leave and search somewhere else. So that was the reason I had to introduce him more clearly to my plan – besides, it could be done much faster and better if there is two of us instead of me by myself. However, no more romantic feelings – remember, I just wanted to taste his lips for once. Therefore, I have done it twice… That is… More than a comfort for my soul. At least could be…
My dear Albus,
yes, I am aware that we spoke in person a while ago; even so, it keeps me awake, and I have the urge to write to you.
It is about the plan I have - I want to apologize for not explaining it to you the way I should have. That is probably why you have been confused several times in my presence, and I understand that. You do not have to be ashamed because of that, and you should not even feel stupid – it is simply just my fault because I did not tell you earlier.
However, I want to explain it to you now. Since we live so close to each other, I am sure you will read the letter before we meet in the morning.
I would like to ask you if you share the same opinion with me about muggle and wizarding relationships with each other, so please pay attention; what I mean is that half of the muggles live in our world and the other half have no idea about our existence. It is definitely wrong for me, and it would definitely be easier if everyone knew about our world - it would be a kind of unification, but of course, muggles would have to learn to live in our world. Together we could explain it to them, tell them why we, as wizards, must have dominion over the world. Please do not think that I think of Muggles as anything less than us - I certainly do not. Moreover, you have to admit that we, as wizards, are at an advantage in many things, and we could more easily transfer those advantages to the whole world - and finally stop hiding. Do you know how beautiful the world would be if we could go where we want? If we could play Quidditch anywhere, where do we want to? In addition, we would not have to worry constantly about being found out…
Yes, you may be thinking: But Gellert, wizards and witches used to not be secretive, and they were burned at the stake for it...
However, I do assure You that it would not happen nowadays; we would explain everything to the muggles, make sure everything had its balance and live in a kind of harmony with them. For example, they could have small alliances in which they would rule, but even so, everything would be subject to the wizards, to us, as the builders of the new world.
If you, my dearest Albus, are interested in my proposal, please get in touch as soon as possible - either by sending an owl or by stopping by for tea tomorrow. I will be happy to answer all your questions.
Oh, I almost forgot; as for the Deathly Hallows and why I need them!
This is another part of the plan, which I mentioned above. Getting all of the Deathly Hallows would ensure that we have control over this newly established regime until someone else comes along that we can trust and hand over all command to - and I think we both deserve more years than ordinary wizarding life has to offer. Even in that short time, I noticed that you are extremely smart - and together with your pretty face, you have incredible possibilities!
I believe in You, and please write to me or stop by and let me know what you think.
Yours Gellert
Therefore, I sent Albus a letter after the little owl and went to bed, pretty tired. I did not feel like undressing, so, almost empty and confused, I fell asleep dressed, sprawled out on the bed. A dreamless night brought me a night of pretty good and sound sleep, and I was deeply in my sleep until I heard a knocking on my roof window.
My dearest and only Gellert,
I wish you a beautiful morning.
Your letter made me extremely happy. I am so grateful that you decided to share your plan and your thoughts with me so openly - you certainly do not have to apologize for anything. I understand that you could not tell me earlier. That is totally fine.
I would like to apologize to you because I cannot come today; definitely not during the day. If there is some time in the evening, we could walk around the neighbourhood again - I do not want to disturb Batty.
I agree with your opinion so far and I am impressed by your thoughtful plans - I have never met anyone my age who thinks about serious things like the ones you have mentioned. It really bothers me sometimes that we cannot show ourselves to muggles as wizards. I would not be so sure about dominance to be honest, but from the way you explained everything to me, it seems to me that you have everything perfectly thought out and you know what you are doing. There are a few things that I would like to ask about, but I really do not have time today - I have to pick up Ariana's medicine at St Mungo's as well as other household items - again, I do not want to bother Batty and Aberforth has almost nothing to wear.
However, once I get all this done, and my siblings have something to eat, and then we can meet. Count on six o'clock in the evening outside at the fountain - if I am not there even ten minutes past six, unfortunately, we will not see each other today.
Thank you repeatedly for your letter.
I miss you already,
Yours, only, Albus.
Oh, Albus... And here I thought that if I explained my plan to you in detail, you'd be interested enough to stop caring about what's between us, whatever it is.
Yours, only, Albus.
What does that mean, please? Are you trying to make me... Own you? What if I don't want to? Would you try after that? Would you rub me? No, no that does not sound like you... Maybe you would have a meltdown. However, would I want you to collapse from it? Probably... I do not know...
However, what if I really wanted to own you? To have someone like you - someone so smart, intelligent and perfect, and even possess you... You could do nothing then, my dearest Albus, you could never do anything bad against me. No, it would always have to be just what I would approve of... Is that how you want it? Do you just have a sick desire to be owned by someone?
For the next few hours, I was lost in my research, in thoughts of Albus; about his naivety and whether it was wrong to think of him like this - but after all, I meant it all well. Therefore, it could not be wrong.
We met. I thought so, sure, he found the time for me. He would do anything to see me, and I was getting slowly tired of it, but also strangely interested and impressed. It was not a sick desire to be owned, but to be loved. However, I was not sure if I could give him something like that. Something like love.
/AD/
I did everything I could to see him tonight. I attended to Aberforth all day, hoping that then his insinuations would be a little less cruel, and he would not reproach me for so many things. I had a reading with Ariana, she wasn't having the best day today. But that sometimes happens with us. It is hard, yes, but you can learn to live with it.
They both looked satisfied when I left the house, so I had no qualms.
I saw him the moment I found myself in the courtyard where the fountain is. I had to smile brightly when he turned to me. He stood there just as he had the first day we had seen each other - hands behind his back, his collar full buttoned to his neck, blond hair locks sweeping his face and cheeks. And especially his blue eyes, which suited him so well. So well.
"Good evening, Albus," he smiled too, but a little coldly. Or maybe so it seemed to me. It certainly just seemed that way to me.
"Gree’ings," I waved my hand slightly before tucking it back into my pocket next to my wand. I was smiling very pleased, I was happy for myself making it and for him being actually here. I gulped a bit. Gellert smiled again, a little lazily this time.
"Is there something specific you want to show me here?" he asked, starting to walk towards the fountain. Only now, when we were walking next to each other, I realized again the events of yesterday, and I felt my cheeks burning. I shook my head with a shrug and a little cough. He notices, because he raised his eyebrows, then probably getting to what I had on my mind and almost teasingly patting my shoulder.
"Probably nothing specific, just-"
"Take me to the cemetery, then," he pleaded, lightening the atmosphere with another smile and removing the annoying friendly hand. I raised my eyebrows in confusion.
"To a graveyard? But- Ah! You think that- But we can't break in there, even if there's something there..."
"Why not? You wouldn't break in there even if one of the Deathly Hallows was there?" he tempted me and I could not help but shrug my shoulders again, but finally had to nod.
"I guess so. If I was absolutely sure it was there, I'd probably do it—if I had your plan, of course..."
"But you have it, Albus. I have told you everything I am planning. I took the liberty of taking your letter as approval. Can I take it that way or not?
“Well…,” I thought for a bit. I had to think fast because a long pause could cause withdrawal and he would know I wasn't sure. And he might stop confiding in me. Not only that, he could stop seeing me altogether. Maybe then we would never see each other again. The thought terrified me because Gellert was someone I was closest to at the moment and I didn't want - couldn't - lose him. "Well yes. Sure you can take him that way, I just... I just wanted to ask about your next move. Otherwise, I agree with you, yes." I mumbled it all so fast I wasn't sure it was believable. But I must have thanked my expressive powers again because Gellert smiled.
"Don't be nervous about it here. Nothing's going to happen, we're not going to get caught. And I'm glad you see it the same way. You don't even know how… How hard it was to even find someone who shared my opinion, Albus."
I shook my head. "Find? So... You've already given your plan to someone-"
"No!" he jumped into my speech so quickly and forcefully that I almost tripped over the tombstone with a start. Regretfully, I turned around, quietly muttering some kind of forgiveness for the dead, and when I looked back at the road ahead, Gellert was standing right there. I was startled again and blinked.
“By all saints… Don't startle me like that,” I laughed nervously. Was it us or the cemetery atmosphere that today was not the same us as yesterday? I was sure this was another Gellert. Not the nice and gallant one. And I was a different Albus too - scared, scared and nervous. Gellert must have noticed because he took my shoulders and looked me in the eye. Owls hooted, fireflies and nocturnal insects and birds flying around us, but there were no other signs of life in the cemetery. On the contrary.
"Albus, listen to me. I am serious about our plan. I never told anyone because I did not have to—everyone, I could tell from the very start, that they would be against it. I just did not bother, I did not have to. However, with you, I was not sure at first - I would not blame you if you saw it differently, but I had a feeling you would be intelligent enough to see that I did not mean any of this. Do you know how we had fun and talk in the meadow yesterday? As I told you, they expelled me from school because they thought it was black magic... Phew, even if it was, it was for a good cause. I just wanted to - the girl was trapped under the lake. She was thrown there by her classmates, I don't know, if they really wanted to drown her, she had a bubble charm around her head. However, she could not get out, and normal charms did not work. She was a pureblood girl, someone who did not deserve this treatment at all. I got her out, I had to try hard. Then she told me about the classmates who did this to her, and I got upset it pissed me off. I found them and tried to get out of them why they did it. They just laughed that she was a fool. This pissed me off even more and I could not help it - I cast a drowning spell on them causing all three - yes three - to suffocate. I didn't care at that point. They deserved punishment, and none of the professors would give it to them. They were favourite ones. But they were laughing even after they got out of the spell. You can understand, Albus, how angry I was. Not just because of the poor girl, but also when I found out that one of the boys was a muggle. A muggle-born wizard, that is. I just couldn't control myself anymore, and…”
I did not have to ask further what happened. Gellert told me in the meadow yesterday that he was accused of the Cruciatus curse. I swallowed hard, even though I already knew the ending from yesterday. The muggle boy went mad and did not recover for three days. And never after that.
I took in a shaky breath, suppressing all resentment towards the boy in front of me for what he had done. He meant well. We all make mistakes sometimes. I carefully took his hand, I could feel him shaking slightly. You see, he himself was uneasy about it. I looked into his eyes.
"Gellert, you meant it well. You saved that girl and if it wasn't for you, she might have drowned. Yes, all three boys would be fine, but that muggle wizard and his two friends would probably hurt other people in the school. Maybe you first should have turned to one of the adults’ but-"
"I tried that a long time ago! That muggle was just making a mess at school! None of the professors really paid attention, I was... Really upset," he defended himself and I nodded. I grabbed his hand again because he let go of mine in exasperation.
"And that's why it was… the right thing to do. You meant it well. In addition, that's all that matters. You meant it well," I repeated the last words emphatically, still looking into his eyes. I didn't know what to expect from him now.
But nothing miraculous or expected happened. At least not in my eyes. I imagined him hugging me, holding me in his arms and thanking me for existing. How nice he will be to me, just like yesterday. But as we said, this was just a completely different Gellert.
"Come on," he said after a while, pulling me by my sweaty hand along the narrow path between the graves, "I think it's over there."
I shook off the chilling feeling this Gellert's hand was giving me and obediently followed him. Maybe we'll talk about it later. Maybe she's just nervous like me.
"Do you see that?" he called after a while and stopped so abruptly that I bumped into his back. As if he didn't even notice, he fiddled with his wand in his sleeve. "Lumos," he whispered, turning on his light. He pointed his wand at the grave and then smiled triumphantly as he saw the Deathly Hallows sign. Even I, despite all the nervousness and uneasiness, had to smile. But it was hard for me to decide whether it was the sign on the grave that made me smile or Gellert's joyful and sincere smile.
We spent some time at the cemetery looking at the grave and making notes about its location and surroundings. After half an hour, Gellert straightened up, took some parchments with inscriptions from the tomb slab and smiled at me. It was the nice Gellert again. My Gellert.
"Well, I think we've got what we need. Would you like to come to check again tomorrow and... Well, maybe open it?" he asked quietly, handing me several parchments to fold. I took a ragged breath and shook my head.
"I don't know, not that I don't want to, but Gellert, what if we get caught? How are you going to explain it?" I made sure and handed him the folded parchments.
"I like how realistic you are. Sometimes it's really beneficial because you care for many things. You rarely go wrong, do you?" he asked with a laugh and stormed away from the graveyard. I followed him, obediently, without a word.
We arrived at his house because I didn't want to wake up my siblings and Gellert assured me that we wouldn't wake Batty up. I agreed and very quietly followed him up the stairs to the first floor and then to the attic. I didn't even have time to look around and he closed the door behind us.
"So," he gestured to his bed, "sit here. Do you want some tea or something?" he asked, I think more out of politeness, and I also declined out of politeness. He smiled and began to put our work of the day carefully on the table. I couldn't help it and had to go and see.
"Oh, by the Merlin!" I watched his work with a huge interest - it wasn't just a few parchments and books like at home - it was an entire library, everything that could be found on the Deathly Hallows. Writings, books, objects, even originals from previous owners of the Elder Wand. I carefully picked up a kind of stone.
“Unfortunately, it's a replica,” he said grimly as he glanced at me. But he continued to work on his desk. "I spent three weeks looking for it, everything pointed to it being the one. The Resurrection Stone. And the stupid old man I asked last time reassured me. Then I found out it was just a replica and you won't believe how pissed off I was - would you believe that a hundred people chased after just a replica? It still annoys me today..."
"She's pretty believable, don't you think?" I asked looking at what was probably black obsidian. Gellert frowned.
"Hmm, how do you know it is credible?" he asked and I blinked. Didn't I tell him?
“Well…,” I began cautiously as he took a few steps closer to me. I didn't know whether to feel excited or scared. "They say they turned it into jewellery. Probably a necklace or ring, maybe a bracelet, but—"
"You mean to tell me," Gellert began, now staring me straight in the eyes, sitting on the bed and pulling me along, "you mean to tell me that someone made this exactly like a real stone?!" He almost yelped in excitement and I blinked again and contorted my face in pain as my companion took my shoulders violently. He probably didn't realize it in his delirious state. I nodded.
"Y-yeah..."
"Albus! Albus, you're- you're brilliant! You're my salvation, my… my angel, my…" He stopped mid-sentence when he realized he'd gotten out of bed with me and was holding me tightly around my shoulders. I stared at him wide-eyed, but his bright eyes gave me a kind of happiness.
"...your...?" I decided to finish the sentence, but he let go of my shoulders and turned back to the table with a slight blush.
"You're amazing," he said softly, and my hopes collapsed like a house of cards. Nothing again. When will he finally hug me? When he finally turns to me again, he lifts my chin with his spidery fingers and…
"Gellert..." I whispered, walking closer to him. Maybe it was my turn now. Maybe he didn't because he didn't know if I wanted to. I turned the taller boy towards me by the shoulder and took a breath before looking into his eyes.
"Yes, Albus?" he asked, obviously confused, blinking a few times to find the direction my eyes were looking in the darkness. "Albus…" he whispered just as quietly as I had before when he realized his lips were my target.
I didn't think much longer. I stood on my tiptoes, quickly tucking my auburn hair behind my ears so it wouldn't get in the way of my face and pressed my lips to his. It was different than yesterday - it was a little more familiar, a little less awkward but still just as beautiful. For a moment I thought he was going to be the one to prolong the kiss, but it was just the opposite - he ended it, and quite quickly. He only gave me a few, maybe three small returns during the entire kiss and then pushed me away by the shoulders.
"Albus, we can't-"
"Sorry!" I yelled and blinked in confusion, taking three steps back and falling awkwardly onto the bed. I got up quickly. "No- I shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry-" I flew out the door before I could even meet his eyes. I vaguely heard him calling for me to come back, then his footsteps on the stairs behind me - but I ran quickly, out. I ran out, into the classic summer rain and with a raincoat pulled over my head.
I was running, probably not even home. I felt so bad, I just ruined the best friendship I've ever had. I didn't even know if tears were running down my face or if it was just the rain getting heavier. I managed to run to the end of the street, my heart pounding and my lungs rising from my chest. I realized too late that by splashing in the puddles I had caused a commotion in the street, and now several voices echoed through the usually quiet little square, "Hey, bum, what are you doing running around in the rain?"
In the voice, I could hear the neighbour who had not gotten along with us since the beginning of moving in. He wasn't very nice to my mother, and apparently, he didn't like me either. "What, your crazy little brother is terrorizing you?!" cackled the neighbour's voice, joined by another, the unpleasant croaking voice of his wife, "Aren't you their youngest? Wait, Sam, that'll be the younger one, he's weird enough to be wandering outside in the rain..." They both they looked out of the window of the second floor of their house and shone an oil lamp into the splattered street.
"What are you making such a fuss about? Sam, compare your wife!" another neighbour spoke up, searching for me with his eyes after a while. "What about you here? That's the Dumbledore boy, isn't it? A-Abelard? Well?"
Crying, confused and angry at the same time, I ran back home. I was getting close, passing the last three houses when I bumped into someone. "I-I'm sorry..." I stuttered and tried to dodge, but the figure got in my way again. I had to look up.
He was standing before me, completely soaked and without a raincoat. Only in what I last saw him at his house.
"What kind of nonsense are you doing here?! They'll still think you're crazy, please come..." I felt Gellert take my arm and drag me somewhere with him. The voices died down, I could only hear indistinct murmurs. I obediently followed my blond friend, letting him drag me home. To make matters worse, as Gellert was getting me out of the wet raincoat, I saw Aberfoth appear in the corridor. He was holding a lamp and standing sullenly half-clad in goloshes. Apparently, he was about to follow me when he heard a shout in the street.
"What the hell," he snapped at me, "what the hell," his voice was angry, "you're freaking out! You've gone completely insane, huh? Had smart bigger brother gone crazy? And I was hoping Ari would be the last one!"
"Sorry, Abe…" I just whispered, but I could not get much more out of it.
"Leave him alone," I heard Gellert's voice cut me off and let myself be dragged cowardly to my room. There my companion laid me on the bed, undressing me from my wet clothes. He did not say anything and I certainly did not either. This was probably the worst thing that ever happened to me, and the neighbours saw me doing it. All I wanted...
"Gellert..." I whimpered softly and he turned to me but shook his head.
"You need to get some sleep, Albus. You are confused and you've had enough today. It's normal to get homesick sometimes or…"
"No, no it's not nostalgia!" I tried to defend myself and jumped off the bed, but he pushed me back.
"Albus, you have to get some sleep! You just have to!" he said firmly and I whimpered again. I didn't want him to leave me here.
"Gellert, please! Please, I don't want to be here alone..." I begged in agony, reaching for him. Gellert closed his eyes for a moment, then looked at the door and leaned closer to me.
"Your brother wouldn't be happy to find out why you ran away, Albus. So let's say you got really sick and got… homesick. Yeah?"
I had no choice. I had to nod because he was right. However, saying that made me feel even closer to him. I tugged at his sleeve in agony, like a small child demanding attention, and stubbornly looked him in the eye. "But I don't want to be here alone..." I hoped he would comply. At least a bit.
He took a deep breath and hung his head. "Alright…" he said after a moment and let go of me, "I'll talk to Aberforth, okay? I need to at least try to explain to him, Albus."
***
"Aberforth?" Gellert cautiously addressed Albus' younger brother who was sitting sullenly on the steps. So the blond boy next to him.
"Leave me alone, you scoundrel..." Aberforth snapped at the older boy, repeating his words. His brown hair was cut unevenly above his eyebrows and his expression looked devastated. Gellert cautiously sat down a little further away.
"I just wanted to tell you that I'm staying here with Albus for the night. He's been sick and-"
Aberforth sneered and slammed his fist down on the stairs. "Wrong? Well sure. He was with you though..."
"...and that's why he ran out into the street. I think he just wanted to go home, but he was really dizzy. He was completely pale..."
"What did you do to him?!" the brown-haired boy suddenly yelled, his eyes blinking in terror above his freckled nose. He pulled out his wand.
"Come on..." Gellert tried to calm him down and lowered his wand, "I didn't do anything to him. He just felt sick. I think it will be the weather..."
"The weather? Well, the weather! Well, hold me, really, my brother is sick of the weather!" Aberforth shouted and stood up, pointing his wand at the blond boy still sitting on the steps. Gellert didn't bother to get up.
"Well, look, I didn't really hurt him. I want to stay here for the night so that—"
"So you can continue your black magic and practice it on my brother! No, no I won't let you! Get out now, run..." Aberforth tried to force the boy up and get him off the stairs, but Gellert was already up and grabbed the poor brown-haired man by the collar and pinned him against the wall. Aberforth shakily dropped his wand and blinked several times in horror, looking into the blond's eyes. He looked as if he had seen the devil.
"Enough!" roared Gellert, pinning the boy against the wall. "I didn't do anything to Albus. I didn't hurt him, sure! But keep it up a little longer and I'll hurt you!" he yelled at him, slamming him against the wall and then letting the poor boy go. He ran back upstairs to Albus's room and in order to hide, closed the door calmly and smiled at Albus.
"I'll stay here," he added in a much friendlier way than was proper manners, sitting down on Albus' bed. Meanwhile, the auburn-haired boy had changed into dry clothes and crawled into bed, a lamp on the bedside table and reading some kind of novel. He lifted his head and smiled when his friend appeared.
"Do you want to sleep here?" Albus asked, shifting, making plenty of room on the bed. Gellert shrugged.
"Could be," he smiled and walked over to the chair for his own blanket. He grabbed it and then lay on the other side of the bed, staring at Albus. He took a breath, wanted to say something - but Albus curled up into a ball, smiling, and quickly fell asleep.
***
The boy's careful movements were completely inaudible. The way he looked around for the wand in confusion and took it back said only one thing: the boy was afraid. He quickly picked it up, tucked it into his sleeve, and made his way up the stairs to his bedroom as quickly and quietly as possible. He just stood in front of Albus' door for a moment - he had the urge to peek inside. However, something in him would not allow it, even if he wanted to take a step closer, he could not - like an invisible force, it was pulling him away from the door. He knew it was pointless. Still he could not help himself. Despite all his efforts, he made it to the door - the temptation was too great - and knelt quietly by the keyhole. By Merlin, he prayed, especially that the rotten rascal did not find out…
He leaned closer. He could feel his palms sweating. He saw his brother's room, as he knew it - and focused on the large bed in the middle of the room. The brother was sleeping, probably soundly. In addition, his blond friend was sitting on the bed, legs hanging down. Why is not he sleeping? Aberforth had to force himself to breathe quietly. The blonde boy swung his legs a few more times and then stretched out on the bed, uncovered. After a moment, he turned his head to Albus and probably smiled. He raised one hand and -
Aberforth would have sworn he could see him through the closed door. He looked right there, straight and with a terrible evil look. The boy bit his lip hard but still knelt motionless by the door. The blonde boy turned around after a while and looked at Albus with a completely different expression.
Scary thoughts raced through Aberforth's mind, he had no idea what to make of the boy. To Aberforth, he was the epitome of pure devilry.
He could not stand it and quietly got up from the floor, went to his room and collapsed on the bed crying.