Last week
December 3rd 1974
“What do you mean you’re not coming home?”
“James says I can stay with him”
“What so you’re leaving me alone there?”
“For fucks sake regulus, I’m not leaving you there, just find a friend who’ll take you.”
“you know that’s unfair! She won’t let me go!”
“She’s not letting me go either regulus. You know that.”
“No, no you can’t. Please. Please Sirius, I can’t deal with it.”
All regulus could do was watch his brother walk away.
It was only the start.
December 7th 1974
The first term at Hogwarts went by easily for Regulus Black, he attended and succeeded in all his classes, he made the friends his mother would have wanted him to, and he did not speak to Alice Fortescue again, or anyone his mother wouldn’t have wanted him to.
He didn’t talk to Sirius anymore either.
But then, there was James Potter.
Regulus didn’t like James Potter, he decided, when he saw them together.
Sirius and James were like brothers.
Regulus didn’t like James Potter, everyone was so obsessed with him.
Everyone liked James. He was so great and mighty and loyal.
And Regulus definitely did not like James Potter when he found out that Sirius wasn’t going home for Christmas with him. He was going to the Potters house.
As childish as it sounded, James was stealing his own brother away from him.
Regulus Black did not dislike James Potter. He hated him.
So he wasn’t sure why he didn’t mind that Thursday afternoon in the library when James potter sat next to him.
And he wasn’t sure why he didn’t mind that their knees where touching under the small oak table.
But he did mind that he could see James observing him, questions clouding his eyes.
So he ignored it.
“You alright”
Regulus ignored it.
It was so hard to ignore, he thought.
“You’re Sirius’ brother aren’t you?”
Regulus couldn’t help but notice that he was the second person who had referred to him as Sirius’ brother. He would be upset, but it gave him an exit, his brother was far too eager to be in the spotlight and Regulus was happy to be unseen, that way he didn’t have to worry about other people, he could simply observe them. Maybe that made him sound like a psychopath.
“What are you doing then? Homework?”
Regulus let the silence continue, waiting for something
The sound was silence. The silence was sound.
James leaned over. Regulus could hear the sound of his own heart jumping out of his chest. He was almost convinced James could hear it too.
he hated himself for it.
“Looks positively boring to be honest”
James grabbed the book regulus had been holding only seconds before.
Stop it. Stop it. Stop it.
Regulus wanted to scream
“stop’’ regulus muttered, attempting to clear his thoughts
“What?’’
Regulus looked up, meeting James’ eyes somewhere in the middle.
“just fuck off’’
And for a second he thought he saw James face fall,
Good, he thought, maybe he’ll realise that not everyone loves him
But then Regulus caught his eyes. They were brown, and Regulus should have thought they were plain. But they were anything but plain, swirls of colour and emotion surrounding his iris, it was a brown so deep he could hardly look away.
“right- of course- sorry, I just thought that-“
A few seconds of silence suffocated them.
Regulus was exhausted, “It’s fine just-“he felt annoyed. Who gave Potter the right to be so entitled, to walk into his life, walk into his brother’s life, and expect anything from them.
“go, please.’’
His mother would hate James Potter.