Balance

ll• a side note, I won’t be checking the facts in each of the books, since I’m reading other books right now, and have read both Harry Potter and KOTLC at least twice, so if some details are off, I’m really genuinely sorry.  Also, just so you know Sirius doesn’t have the best persona in this story, and I hate to write him this way, but I have to for the story line, PLEASE Don’t hate me, I love Sirius in real life, I promise!. Anyway, to the story•ll  TW: Abuse        

 I screamed. 

        I couldn’t take it anymore. September. I had to make it 'till September, I thought longingly. It was barely August. 

        I heard some commotion upstairs. I knew it was Draco. He had been really nice to me recently, ever since mother got harder with her punishments. Another scream raked my body as the pain worsened.  

        “There,” I heard the cruel voice say, “Now maybe you’ll learn not to disobey the dark lord, Finley.”

        She spat my name, as though it disgusted her. And as much as I wanted to tell my mother that I didn't believe in his cause, I knew it would only get me in more trouble, with more Cruciatus curses, so I stayed silent. I doubt I could've said anything anyway, given the circumstances. 

        I heard the heavy clumping up the stairs, and knew she was leaving me in my misery.  I waited for her to send Draco down to untie me, as she always did. You see, Bellatrix Lestrange may be my mother, but she doesn’t care for me at all. She was away in prison for a year after I was born, until she was able to imperio someone to take her place using Polyjuice Potion. 

        So, yeah. I grew up with her raising me in my aunt and uncle's house. And since she couldn’t leave, for fear of being recognized, she took all her anger out on me. Draco was always sent to untie me. Aren't I lucky?

        My father is still in Azkaban-- the wizarding prison. In fact, he isn’t even my real father. When I was eleven, I started developing weird powers; unheard of powers. I could control water and feel others' emotions rather strongly.          

        When I went to talk to McGonagall about it, she spoke with the minister and I was collected and brought to a world of 'elves'.  Not house elves, but real, human-looking elves. Elves that live for an indefinite life span. Elves with powers like mine. 

        I had met my half brother, Keefe, and my father, Cassius. Lord Fancy Pants-- as Keefe calls him-- is not a person you would call 'kind'… He has always dismissed Keefe and made him feel unwanted and unneeded. He does the same to me, and I won't lie, it hurts. We both deflate around him. The only person I really feel at home with is Keefe. I always hoped I could make another friend, but the Fates never seem to be on my side.

        “Hey, you okay?” Draco’s voice brings me back to the present. I just groan in reply.  “That was longer than usual, what'd you do this time?”

        I opened my mouth and force out a few words before clenching my teeth again to stop from calling out in pain.  “Didn’t... Meeting… Voldem..”

        “Okay, okay, don't say anything else.” Draco untied me and I curled up into a ball. Draco and I are close, but I'd never let him see the side of me Keefe sees. Plus I only see him in the summer. 

        I listened for the footsteps again, and when I heard them, I relaxed a little.  Dray' lets me unwind, usually. Today, I laid there for a while longer than normal. And when I felt that I had my strength back, I limped up two flights of stairs to my room, stopping to poke my head in Draco’s door to let him know I was up.

        “Better?” He asks.

        “Yeah.”  

        “You look awful.” 

        I ignore him and continue to my room. I love my room. It's red and gold, my house colors and has lots of Gryffindor posters and banners. I never let anyone see my room.  Narcissa and Lucius would be livid, and who knows what my mother would do. I quietly shut the door and lay on my bed. I just lay there imagining the start of school, my fourth year at both Hogwarts and Foxfire, at one every odd month.

        I had a restless night, with dreams of squeezing, twisting, and pulling. It was horrible. I nearly woke up, thanks to it. But things were so confusing, I just shut my eyes tight again. 

        I thought it was a dream, because it was a house I had never seen in my life. But when I opened my eyes again, I was in total shock. 

        I screamed, there's a chicken-horse in my room! My thoughts panicked. No, not my room, a different room. I had been kidnapped! 

        Maybe Moldy Voldy wanted me gone --was done with my shenanigans-- and got someone to lock me in a room with a murderous-looking chicken.

         The horse thing flapped its wings, and I continued to call for help, banging on the wooden door. Maybe someone would hear. Draco? Even Snape would be kind enough to get me out and talk to Keefe.

        Keefe! The thought of what he would think if I suddenly stopped coming home was worse than death, I didn’t want him to always have to live with the thought of “where is she? I thought she should be here.” I went wild then, screaming for help.  

        All of a sudden, the door slammed open, knocking me back. “Shut up, kid!” I went silent. “Gosh, I get you out of there, and all you can do is yell.”

        I just sat there, confused.

        “Don't just sit there! Get up!” The man laughed a bit, and then I recognized him. He was my second cousin; my mother's cousin. And he had escaped from Azkaban a few years ago. Even though I knew he didn’t work for Voldemort, I knew he couldn’t like me.  After all, he and my mother never really got along. 

        “Do you want food or not?”

        This caught me off guard. I was starving, having missed dinner as part of my punishment. I stood up. My legs were weak, so I stumbled many times. And when I reached the man --Sirius, my family-- my legs gave out, and I fell on to him.  “Sorry,” I mumbled, standing up again.

        “I just want you to know that I got you out of there, and you ought to be thankful,” He turned and started walking away. “Oh, food in the kitchen downstairs. Don't take it personal if no one talks to you, we’re all preoccupied with Harry’s trial.  Harry Potter, that is.” And with that, he walked out of the room.  

        I turned, taking in the room. I had almost forgotten about the chicken horse (I think it's a hippogriff?) but it was now just laying calmly on the floor. “Hi,” I whispered.

         I bowed, remembering what we were taught in care for magical creatures. The creature bowed back, and I went to sit with him for a while to gain more strength. I hum to myself as I stroke his neck. Singing was something I loved --other than books-- because you could express so much in your music.  

        After a few minutes of just sitting there, I get up, and head downstairs for some food. I had a hard time getting down the stairs, I guessed that the last night was worse than I thought, and sleeping that whole time didn’t help. I leaned on the railing until I got to the bottom of the steps.  

        I wandered until I found the kitchen, following the scent of oatmeal. When I got there, I see a whole host of people sitting at the table. I recognized Harry, of course, given we're in the same Hogwarts house and he’s kinda famous. Ron Weasleys' whole family is recognizable by their flaming red hair, and Hermione is there as well. There are plenty of people I don’t recognize too though, like a woman with purple hair, and a man who I think works for the ministry. Then my eyes fall on Lupin. He was our DADA teacher in my second year. He was always kind to me, and even invited me for tea a few times. I only accepted once.  

        I walked up behind him, and tapped his shoulder. No one had noticed me up to this point. I was really good at blending into the background, what with my black hair and pale skin. The contrast is a lot, but I know how to blend in. Lupin spun around and almost gasped. I cover his mouth. I didn't really want to be noticed right now, later I definitely would, but I'm not in the best shape at this moment.

        “Finley!” he whispered. “You look awful. What happened? How did you get here?”

        I dodged the first question, “I don't really know. I just woke up here this morning.”

        “Well here, have some oatmeal.”

        I took the offering, and sat in a back corner, humming as I ate. Even as I started to feel better, and more like my usual self, I kept to myself. 

        No one even seemed to notice that there was one more person than usual all day until dinner. When I was eating again, and accidentally caught someone's eye. It was one of the Weasley twins. Fred --I thought. Not many people can tell them apart, but living in the shadows gives you some time to study people. Again, I don’t live in the shadows by choice, no one really talks to me is all. So I spend time watching people. I wasn’t mad he noticed me, not even a little. But the fact that he just went on eating hurt a little. 

        Maybe I was a little starved of any attention, having not seen Keefe all summer. I finished earlier than most of the others, so I went up to the room I woke up in in the morning.  The hippogriff was still there, so I sat with him and started quietly singing. I sang and sang and sang. All whispers, but beautiful none the less. After a while, I lost myself to the music and stroking the creature in front of me.

I don’t know how long I sat there, but all of a sudden I heard someone talking outside my door.  “Just hold on a minute… You can go to bed!” Then my door banged open.  “I Knew it!” 

        Could Fred Weasley possibly know who I am? I just stayed quiet. “I knew someone was up here!”

PLEASE READ AT LEAST TO FIRST BREAK!!  Important information in case you missed it or are confused!