Chapter 2
Sirius was beyond exhausted. He even had fallen asleep on Lily’s couch, only to be awakened by Moody and asked more questions about the Fidelius Charm, them switching Secret-Keepers, and so on.
“So Albus performed the switch?” Moody asked for the 100th time, it felt like.
“Yes, Alastor! As I said before, I was too obvious a choice and Dumbledore said he could not be the Secret-Keeper.”
“Why?”
“He implied he was the one for the Longbottom family already.”
“I know for a fact, that Augusta is their Secret-Keeper.”
“Huh, but...”
“He probably is the Secret-Keeper for the place where he hides all his Lemon Drops,” Moody groused.
Sirius chuckled, “That would be typical! I just wonder why he pushed for Peter.”
“What do you mean?”
“I wanted Remus, but the headmaster said that Remus is spending too much time with the packs and said that he might get pulled to the dark side.”
“The werewolf packs? Why would he?” Moody looked confused and then exclaimed, “Because he is one?”
Sirius nodded, wincing, “It’s a secret.”
“Understandable. Well, it is a good argument. But I don’t understand one thing.”
“What?”
“Albus is an accomplished Legilimens. He scans superficial thoughts constantly.”
Sirius looked shocked, “But then he must have seen Peter’s deception!”
“Exactly. Why do you think I never insisted on a loyalty oath for the order?”
“Because it might come in conflict with the one to the ministry?”
“Yeah, that too, but there are ways around it. So, he must have known Peter was the traitor! Damn,” Moody sat down next to Sirius looking old.
Sirius could sympathize. That meant, that... “Did Dumbledore want the Potters to be found?”
“Beats me. Maybe it was for the greater good?” Moody said half-jokingly.
Sirius sprung up and would have run out to go to Dumbledore and hex him good, but Moody stunned him in the back.
“Idiot boy,” he murmured and levitated Sirius to the floo, to get the man home. He flooed over to Sirius’ apartment and laid the young man on his bed and went back to the Potter’s household. After he left a note on Sirius’ chest with ‘Think before you act!’ written on it.
Back at the Potter residence, he found a few of the people, who had watched the proceedings from a safe distance. in the living room of the Potters, looking for the stuff of the fallen couple, after hearing a rumor that You-know-who had been vanquished here.
Moody let out an angry yell and cast an area-wide stunner. One that he had practiced for years but never had gotten right but now he was incensed enough, so it worked.
“Who let looters on to an active crime scene?” he bellowed.
Quickly two young red-faced Aurors ran into the room and one rambled, “Sorry sir, my mother pushed her way in, and then there was a flood of people, and we were finished anyway...” he mumbled the last under Moody’s glare.
“That does not excuse the stealing! You will arrest every one of them still in the house and search them for Items belonging to the Potters and you better not have taken anything, or you are off the force as quickly as you can say ‘Corrupt Corps’! Hop to it and tell the others!” Moody barked.
The two swallowed and went to work. Secretly putting back the things they had taken themselves while caught in the moment, not thinking they were doing anything wrong.
Moody emptied the pockets of all the scavengers of Potter things on the living room floor and spelled “Looter” on each forehead. It could not be dispelled for 24 hours. He thanked James Potter silently for teaching him that spell.
He then banished one after the other beyond the ward line, where others were quite discouraged to come in and take a look, after the sight of the banished ones.
In the end, only one of Lily’s scarves went missing but that wasn’t too bad. At least the rest had been saved, as the looting had just started. Moody called a friend in construction to fix the roof and then cast the charm to preserve the crime scene on the property after the repair was done. Only four higher-up ministry employees could take the charm down now, working together. Or the adult owner and one ministry worker.
The charm was more to preserve the property for the boy than for their investigation.
He walked by the wailing, bitching, and gossiping bystanders and apparated away as soon as he stepped over the ward line, the preservation charm going into effect immediately afterward.
The watching people grumbled annoyed. They wanted to have a look themselves! At least the ones without the word on their forehead.
The Aurors would never find out who had been at the scene and done the unthinkable thing of breaking two wands.
And luckily no one ever noticed the mud on Lily’s neck and back, that Severus had unknowingly left there when he lifted her into his arms.
The implications and resulting repercussions would have been quite bad.
Severus woke up abruptly! He sat up and quickly looked around for the danger, but there was none. He was in a cave...
He was at Gringotts! Now he remembered. Lily! Oh no! Lily was... He pulled up his Occlumency shields quickly before he could bawl but got hit with a stick for his efforts!
“No mental shutting off! Mourn, you idiot!”
He turned around and looked at the most grizzled goblin he had ever seen.
“How... who... “
“I am Gribnuck. You work for me now. I need you healthy, so no shutting off.”
“How can you tell?”
“I will tell you as soon as your shields are down!”
“Are you a Legilimens!”
“Bah! No. My head is enough for me. Now down with them, boy!”
The tall, lanky young man swallowed and thought about the goblins giving him Sanctuary and nodded. He slowly pulled his shields down and grief poured into him in waves. Not only for Lily but for his mother as well and his unhappy life as well. Tears ran down his thin face and he sank into himself, sobbing and screaming into his folded arms. Anger was there as well, in spades.
The goblin stood by him and guarded the mourning and raging young man.
After quite some time, the sobs ebbed off and Severus raised his head. He got out a handkerchief and cleaned his face and blew his nose.
“Better,” Gribnuck said. “Now come, the boy is asking for you.”
“Harry!” Severus jumped up. His magic sang contently. The boy was all right. So, he took a moment to freshen up.
Severus then was led to a warded play area, where Harry played with some goblin toddlers. Severus stared for a second, never having seen young goblins. They looked cute!
Little Harry looked up and beamed at Severus, “Hi!” He chirped.
“Hello Harry, good to see you!”
“You!”
“Good to see me as well?”
Harry nodded and Severus was totally out of his comfort zone but blundered on.
“My name is Severus, you may call me Sev.”
“Sev! Hi!” Harry waved and then asked, “Mummy?”
“Uh, Your Mummy is uh... sleeping.”
“Daddy?”
“He is sleeping as well.”
Harry frowned and said, “Pafoo?”
“Uh... I don’t... do you mean Padfoot? I think Sirius Black’s nickname at school was Padfoot.”
Harry nodded and said again and much more empathically, “Pafoo?”
“Sorry, I don’t know. Please don’t cry. We will find out, yes?”
Severus looked helplessly at Gribnuck who nodded and then said, “The young one is fine here, you follow me now!”
Severus looked Harry over once more. The child’s forehead was clear of any wounds and even scars and he looked fine as far as Severus could tell.
Luckily for all present, the coming storm was prevented by one of the goblin toddlers knocking over Harry’s tower of wooden bricks! The little one was quite distracted by that and scolded his playmate and started building his tower once more. He wanted to push it over himself!
Severus rushed after the surprisingly fast old goblin and was led into a large potions chamber. It was amazing! Like the ‘potions chamber of his dreams’ kind of amazing!
He told the proudly chuckling Gribnuck so.
Damn, no Occlumency shields meant no filters, it seemed. That made him remember, “You wanted to tell me how you know when I have my shields up.”
Gribnuck nodded and said, “I see shields in all forms. Even mental ones.”
“That seems impossible! What do they look like?”
“How do you explain the color green to a blind person?”
“Oh.”
“Exactly. - Now, I need to assess your proficiency in potions brewing. You will brew a Blood Replenishing potion, a Draught of the Living Dead, and a Felix Felicis parallel to one another, as quickly and perfectly as you can.”
Severus nodded and looked around. He saw everything he would need for all three potions and said, “Might I get a logbook? I am used to documenting everything I do.”
Gribnuck nodded agreeably, glad that the young one was doing so, and sat back and watched. The young potions master obviously knew all three potions by heart and had thought about the different timescales and ingredient preparations he needed to prepare. He started the base for the luck potion first, which needed to simmer for 45 minutes, and started the preparations for the other two, getting most ingredients and items ready, but not starting the brewing, before working on the second step of the first potion he had started.
Only after finishing that step and leaving it to cool off naturally, he quickly started both other potions together. Working quickly but calmly. It was like watching a dance of deep concentration and efficiency in motion. Everything he did was calculated and precise. It was a joy to watch, and he had both potions at a place, where they needed no attention when he went back to the luck potion.
And so, it went. Well-timed and obviously he had adapted and improved the recipes. After two hours the Blood Replenishing potion and the Draught of the Living Dead were finished looking perfect, and the Felix Felicis was simmering on its last step, for the next full month.
Severus, who had been feeling raw and vulnerable after his break-down slowly regained his inner equilibrium and center again. But those were true, not the fake ones Occlumency provided. The potion brewing had helped him immensely with that and he started to be thankful to Gribnuck for insisting on letting his shields drop. It seemed Occlumency had become his emotional crutch. The books had warned against it, but he had seen no other way at that time. Well, he would continue to meditate and sort his memories and thoughts. He needed to stay on top, mentally and practice shielding his mind even if he kept his shields down most of the time.
After the young potions master had cleaned up his workstation by hand – as one should – and everything was back at its place he turned to Gribnuck and raised an eyebrow.
The old goblin chuckled and said, “You will do.”
Severus scoffed and answered dryly, “Indeed.”
“I will not use you for mass-producing simple potions. Sit and tell me about your projects.”
“If I tell you, will it still be my intellectual property, even if I am here as a Sanctuary Seeker?”
“Yes. But if you develop something here, 20% of your earnings will go to Gringotts.”
“That is too much! 5% of the profit is more than enough!”
Gribnuck and Severus haggled for a while and agreed on 10% of any profit Severus made, after paying all expenses and buying new ingredients and stuff.
Severus then shared his ideas, and they soon were talking shop so intensely, no one else was able to follow them. Both were in their element so when another goblin came and said, “The Potter boy wants Sev to be there for lunch,” they were both growling at the poor messenger.
Severus followed the much younger goblin, deep in thought. This was everything he ever wanted. Brew, assess his theories and talk shop with his peers, and keep Harry safe. During the two months he’d been teaching Potions at Hogwarts, he hated it with a passion and felt absolutely no guilt for leaving the school to its own accords. Being 21, he was too young for it! He had taught students, who went to school with him. And he’d had no plan to work with, just the faulty books the children were taught with, and some nebulous memories of Slughorn’s teachings. As a student he had learned quickly to blend Slughorn’s voice out. The man waffled on about nothing but his collection of famous people and told them to brew this or that potion. The old teacher must have taught more than the little that was in the recipe books, but Severus couldn’t remember it for the life of him. And he might have been too proud to ask for help with his new teaching job. The only way he had been able to hold all the little buggers in check was by being harsh with them. He was more than scared of one of them hurting themselves beyond repair and so berated them all quite harshly.
He never wanted to go back there, ever! He wouldn’t have thought he would come to hate Hogwarts even more now after his horrible time as a student there. So, he would not go back. Full stop.
Just when he had made that decision, he walked into pandemonium. Harry was crying and wailing at the top of his lungs and Severus was stumped about what to do. Helplessly he looked to the goblin, who had brought him here, but the goblin looked back just as forlornly.
Harry took care of the indecision and cried out, “Sev!” And held out his little arms. Severus was at his side with two long strides and picked the little one up immediately. Harry cuddled into him and hiccupped and sobbed quietly.
Severus patted his little back and awkwardly said, “There, there.”
One of the green-clad goblins nodded and said, “He has very healthy lungs!”
Severus chuckled and Harry grew still. Fascinated by the deep sound, rumbling under his ear. He just felt so safe with the new person, just as safe as he did with his mummy and daddy. Were they still sleeping?
Severus said to the healer goblin, “Do you have any idea why he trusts me so much? I mean, we just met yesterday evening under horrible circumstances.”
“His magic knows of the oath to keep him safe and so trusts you. He is very attuned to his magic, therefore he trusts you.”
“I see. And how do you know about the oath?”
“I see it.”
“How... Oh, like Gribnuck ‘sees’ my Occlumency shields?”
“Exactly.”
“Do all goblins see such things?”
“Only some of the older ones. It is a very hard skill to learn, but if you wish, I can teach you. But be warned, it takes many years. Humans normally lack patience.”
Severus nodded and said, “Thank you for the offer! I would like that very much, but I have to ask Gribnuck first. My sanctuary is preliminary after all.”
“I understand. Should your sanctuary become approved fully you might ask for me – Healer Gingerroot is my name. Now, come and eat. The little one is hungry and sleepy.”
Severus nodded and sat down with Harry on his lap and fed him the lunch that was obviously for the child. As soon as it was finished, Harry conked out and was laid in his little cot, so he could nap.
“Do you have any news from the outside?”
“Yes, that constipated peacock of a headmaster of yours declared that little Harry here vanquished Lord Voldemort all by himself.”
Severus flinched when his tattoo twinged him and chuckled at the idiotic thought of a toddler doing that and the name for Dumbledore.
“How did he divine that?”
“I have no idea. He had not been at the site, that we know.”
“Like he wants that to be the truth...”
“Yes. And everyone thinks his shit smells like roses and his lies are gold.”
“You do not like Headmaster Dumbledore very much, do you?”
“No. He is much too tightly shielded. It looks like his intestines are not working.”
“Constipated, I see. He means well. But this game is concerning.”
“Yes. He told everyone that the little one has a scar on his forehead from his ‘fight’.”
“How does he know that? That does not make any sense!”
“Oh, it does, if Lily Potter used the old Ritual of Motherly Love. It leaves just this mark if a deadly spell is cast on her infant.”
“I never heard of it.”
“It went out of practice 1300 years ago. They must have unearthed it somehow. Maybe in the Potter’s grimoire. Or the peacock brought it to the Potters?”
“Both possible happenstances. That would explain how he knew of the wound, but that would mean...”
“That he sacrificed the Potters to defeat Lord Voldemort.”
Severus flinched and nodded slowly.
“I do not want to believe that. He promised me he would do his best to keep Lily safe!”
“But not on his magic, would be my guess. – Something else, why do you flinch when I say the name of Lord V?”
“’ Lord V’ is a good compromise. When I hear his full name my Dark Mark stings me quite harshly. He included it to always make us think of him and the pain he can cause whenever we hear his name spoken. It is a warning to keep us in line. Fortunately, he later cast a taboo on that name, so we were spared a lot of pain.”
“Understood. Show me this mark.”
Severus pulled back his sleeve and the goblin studied the gray tattoo.
“It was black before yesterday.”
Healer Gingerroot nodded and hummed.
“Well, this is more evidence that the man is disembodied but not dead.”
Severus frowned. That didn’t sound good.
“But not for long,” Healer Gingerroot went on. “If you agree, we will use this mark and the dark magic, we extracted out of little Potter’s wound and pull all his anchors to Gringotts and destroy them. And if he has no anchors... “
“... he will move on?”
“Yes.”
“I must tell you one more thing. I heard a prophecy before Harry was born and it said that he would vanquish the Dark Lord.”
“And he did, according to the peacock.”
“Oh, you are right!” Severus looked over to the little one. “So, the prophecy might be fulfilled. This is why Dumbledore pulled so many strings to accomplish that!”
“He knew of it?”
“He was the only one to hear the full one.”
“Suspicious. Are you sure there was no set-up?”
“No, I am not sure.”
“We will send a scout to the Department of Mysteries to look if there is a prophecy on the shelves there that is authentic. – Anyway, you asked for news from the above-ground dwellers. The peacock’s claims were countered by the Aurors who said that there had only been blood spatters on the covers of little Harry’s crib and no child. So how would Dumbledore know Harry was the one to vanquish Lord V and had a scar if he hadn’t been at the property at all?”
“You are well informed.”
“We have eyes and ears in the Ministry. It is an insurance for our survival and growth.”
Severus nodded and just was glad the Horde was honorable as a whole.
“So, what are they saying about the whereabouts of Harry?”
“The peacock tried to downplay it and look for the boy in secret. Not a bad plan, but not feasible. Too many know about his disappearance. Sirius Black is raising a stink because he had not been allowed to perform the old godfather rites, which would have helped find Harry immensely.”
“Who hindered him?”
“According to the Black Heir, the peacock and then the Potters wanted to be seen as modern and not using old stuffy dark rituals.”
“Right. Well, lucky for Harry. Do you think it is safe for him to go back? What about his parent’s wills?”
“We are still debating and biding our time. As long as he seems to be a pawn in a bigger game, he is better off here with us. But it is still too early to tell. The wills are an interesting topic. The Chief Warlock had them sealed first thing this morning. Before he even realized that Harry had disappeared. But now he refuses to unseal them again. To get that done, he would need to be voted out of office now. But things are still very much in motion. So, let’s wait and see.”
Severus nodded. It had not been a day since the tragedy happened. The goblin was right, it was early.
“You seem well informed.”
“For a healer, you mean?”
“More like, for a normal Gringotts worker.”
“Yes, my family is higher-up, so I have the channels and as little Potter’s healer, I decided to keep myself informed.”
“Thank you. Well, I probably should go back to Gribnuck.” Severus looked around for his goblin guide.
“No, we decided you work with him in the mornings. Little Harry needs human interaction as well, or he would become a little goblin grunt soon. And as long as he sleeps you may talk with me, read, meditate, go out. Whatever. This is your quarters by the way.”
Severus looked around the comfy-looking living room with an open kitchen and five doors going to other rooms. He would investigate later.
“Thank you again. So, when will you pull all these anchors of Lord V?”
“Probably in three days. We need to research the ritual thoroughly. But speaking of which, I need to tell the researchers and ritual masters about your mark. Are you all right here?”
Healer Gingerroot gestured around the room and Severus noted the full bookcases and armchair, the desk, and the meditation mat.
“Perfectly.”
“Good. I will come back as soon as I can. Probably with company that wants to look at the mark.”
The healer left and Severus sank onto the meditation mat, breathing and sorting through his experiences since the last time he had time to do this. It was quite a bit to work through, but he made a dent in the wild tangled pile of memories that he had accumulated.
Albus sank into his comfortable armchair back in his headmaster’s office at Hogwarts. Nothing was going to plan! Well, the main plan had worked. Tom had been vanquished! And at great costs. But then things spiraled out of control. He had assumed this morning that Hagrid had delivered the child to Pomfrey’s capable hands and Albus had rushed to the Ministry archives to seal the Potter’s will tightly and bind it in as many legal tangles as he could.
He then had made a statement to the press in the atrium of the ministry, informing them of Lord Voldemort’s demise and little Harry Potter’s mighty defeat of said Lord Voldemort. He had assured them that Harry was safe at Hogwarts. They ate it up cheering and rushing off to spread the news.
Only then he had been informed that the boy had disappeared, Peter was in a cell, and Sirius was in cahoots with Moody, looking for the boy. This could not be! Peter had been supposed to flee, Sirius to chase him and get arrested and Hagrid to bring the boy! Where had it all gone wrong? He needed to get control of the boy to set his future plans into motion!
Furthermore, Alastor and Sirius had looked at him with doubt in their eyes and with tight Occlumency shields on their minds. Damn, Sirius always had been an open book before! Albus had forgotten Sirius had been trained as an heir of a dark family from a young age.
He had told them harshly, that he was the only one capable of making the hard choices and had saved their world again.
Sirius had growled and said, “But at what cost?”
To what Albus had replied, “Sacrifices had to be made, to save our world, I am sorry Sirius, that you were personally touched by it, but needs must. The costs would have been much greater otherwise.”
There the enraged boy had actually spat at Albus and screamed, “But the sacrifice is always made by others! Never by yourself!” and had stomped off. Fortunately, they had ‘talked’ in Alastor’s warded cubicle and so no one had witnessed Sirius’ accusations but Alastor.
“He’s right, you know? You push us around like pawns in a chess match, forgetting that we’re actual people.”
Albus had sighed and sat down heavily on the chair in front of Alastor’s desk. “I could not lose sight of the whole picture!”
“I understand that, but you get caught up in this game and people die unnecessarily. Albus, we’re not chess pieces!”
“No one died unnecessarily!”
“Marlene MacKinnon? Benjy Fenwick? Fabian and Gideon Prewett? Must I go on?”
“They were killed by Death Eaters!”
“DON’T BULLSHIT ME!”
Albus had shrunk back in shock.
“You knew Peter Pettigrew was a spy in our ranks from the beginning! Don’t pretend you didn’t know!”
“How?”
“It does not matter for this discussion! Those deaths of YOUR Order members were unnecessary! They are on you! Their blood is on your hands!”
Albus had choked back a sob and pushed his emotions behind his Occlumency barriers. He had sat up straight and said, “Voldemort needed to trust Peter’s information.”
“And you took the easy way and threw living people in his path? Is that it? Get out! NOW!”
Alastor had bellowed at Albus who had regally stood up and walked out. Tight hold on his shields.
Now he sat in his armchair and wondered. Was Alastor, right? Had he taken the easy way? Would there have been another, without costing life? Sure. But Albus had too much on his plate to find better solutions. And his world could not run without him!
He rubbed his face in exhaustion and then looked at his hands. Were they bloody? He looked up to Fawkes and asked, “Is Alastor right? Do I treat people like chess pieces?”
Fawkes thrilled a sad confirmation and Albus sank back even more in his chair. Despair threatened to overwhelm him, and he pulled his barriers tightly around his mind and breathed a sigh of relief.
It was easier if all doubts and guilty feelings were locked away and since he had so much to do, he had no other choice, he assured himself. Next Summer he would sit down and sort through his memories.
He conveniently forgot that he had made this plan every year but had never found the time during summer then either. The only thing helping clear his cluttered mind, was his extraction and extern filing of his memories if they piled up too high in his mind. It made it easier to view them again without pesky emotions as well.
He did not notice that he was making himself into a sociopath more and more. Suppressing and extracting memories had that effect on him, unfortunately.
Now he needed to find the boy! Where was Hagrid? He needed answers!