Skidding on the curves of your heart

Barcelona, March 2025

“-We can spend more time with you, you with us now that you have retired from football-Pilar's voice trembles and the unshed tears begin to fall one by one we can help you, daughter, please. Don't go.

-Only I can help myself, mami, and so far, I haven't been able to.

-María-her father's calm and almost resigned tone no longer calms her.

-You retired unexpectedly without telling us until the last minute, you lock yourself in here every day and now you're leaving-says Pilar-you're going far away, Maria, when all we want is to be there for you.

-This is not a goodbye forever, I'll be back sometime, I'll be fine.

- But why Norway? What is there that isn't here?

-Nothing-Mapi answers-that's the idea, you know? I need to start something new, do something different, forget about... things. I thought you'd understand.

-I can't understand it-says her mother, shaking the head again and again-You're going so far away from your family, you left the club, you're abandoning everything. How can you do that?

-You know I couldn't continue playing, I was no longer in my best form, I was a burden for the club-she explains carefully-and I feel... I don't know what I feel anymore.

-Did you stop therapy?

-Mom, therapy isn't going to heal me, do you realize that?

-And moving away from us to go to a distant and unknown place will do it?

Mapi bites the inside of her cheek to stop the furious retort from coming out quickly. They were there for her but, at the same time, they weren't there at all. Just like Alexia, Leila, Aitana. They were all there with opinions and the best will to help her, and they all thought they understood but they didn't. No one understands what they don't suffer in their own flesh.

-We'll talk on the phone, Norway is not the end of the world, okay?

-And we can go visit you-says Javier.

-Let me get settled first and we'll see-Mapi murmurs, trying not to make it sound like a promise.

Going to Norway seemed like a great escape that promised to get her what Barcelona no longer had for her, or at least, she would look for it.

Very reluctantly, because she had done some precautionary shopping so as not to leave the house all weekend, she heads to the village to leave the eggs for Gudrun.

Not leaving home. She laughs to herself at the thought that home is no longer home and was never her home. It was crazy to think that she would put down roots in a place that was never hers and instead of lamenting about it, she would already have to be looking for new accommodation options.

Maybe, when the time came, she would ask Gudrun if she knew anything, although it was hard to get a cabin like the one she has. Well, she could always move to Trondheim and leave it all behind again. She's good at that.

She grimaces at the thought of throwing away what she has built and sighs softly, parks and carefully takes out the basket with a dozen eggs. She could very well ring the bell, accept a cup of tea and talk with Gudrun and Ørjan for a while , but she is not in the mood to do so, she just wants to go home… to the cabin.

She used to be such a chatterbox, and that was just a few years ago. And now, she appreciated silence more and shied away from any attempt at small talk or socializing.

She puts down the eggs and turns around with her phone in her hand to leave a message for Gudrun, distracted by the delicious smell of something baking, to which her stomach growls despite having already had breakfast.

And she bumps into someone as she tries to walk down the steps without looking ahead. Two hands grab her shoulders quickly, a pair of green eyes look at her curiously and now the smell of food takes a backseat because a sweet and unknown fragrance that is not just an expensive perfume fills her nostrils. Ingrid, all flushed and sweaty, seems to her like the most beautiful vision she has ever seen in her life. Almost as beautiful as the day she met her.

And as soon as he realizes that he is holding the woman by the waist, she quickly withdraws the hand and takes a step back, stumbling on a step. She blushes embarrassedly.

-I'm sorry, I didn't see you-Mapi apologizes, stopping to look at those two intimidating orbs.

-Don't worry-Ingrid smiles-are you leaving already?

-Oh, yes, I just stopped by to leave some eggs for Gudrun. Can you tell her I did it, please? -she keeps her nervous gestures to herself, not understanding where they come from, and takes more physical distance.

-Okay-Ingrid looks towards where the basket was left-but I'm sure Mom will love to see you, she's told me a lot about you.

-Oh yeah?

-Yes-the black-haired girl confirms without giving too many details, ready to open the door after collecting the eggs-I'll treat you to a coffee for your kindness. She's in the garden. Or she was when I left. Anyway, that's where she spends her Saturday mornings.

Mapi follows her with her eyes without missing a single movement and curses herself for noticing the tall, slender body worked out in the gym; the clothes she is wearing give her away, although given the type of footwear, she may have been running.

And it's when she walks through the door, there in the reception hall, that she realizes where she knows those green eyes from. There is a photograph-there are many-but this one in particular is of the woman in front of her. Her face is covered up to her nose by a black scarf, and the hood of her cream-colored coat covers her head, leaving several strands of untamed black hair loose, making the striking green eyes, and many dark freckles, the only things visible. And she looks directly into the camera. And she couldn't be more beautiful. It's Ingrid, she knows that now.

Mapi swallows. The first time she visited the house, it was the first thing she noticed. And it stayed with her even though she didn't dare ask Gudrun anything. There she has her answer, one she wasn't looking for.

-So, coffee? -Ingrid asks, raising her eyebrows.

Mapi nods, not trusting her voice to speak, and goes further into the house. This wasn't planned so she doesn't know how much time she can give them or wants to give them.

Ingrid works on the coffee machine with efficiency and simple, easy movements, clearly accustomed to the task. Mapi, again, looks at her too much, so she concentrates on the window that looks out onto the garden from where the greenery peeks out so strong and dark, and the rays of the sun are already threatening. But the heat will not be intense, it never is, not even in the middle of summer, not like in Spain, at least.

She expects Oscar and Frida to appear at any moment and would appreciate it in order to have a distraction and more people to help her overcome her overwhelming nervousness. But the children are not even heard.

-Espresso, Americano, macchiato, latte? -the brunette turns around and waits for an answer-or another of your preference.

-Mmm, yeah, espresso is fine. Thanks.

Ingrid hums a tune as she does so and Mapi feels mesmerized, or should I say idiotized? Well, it's almost the same. The woman in front of her provokes things in her that she doesn't know what they mean but that don't seem good. It's the second time she sees her, how can someone unknown awaken... something, a feeling, anything?

She rhythmically taps the tips of two fingers against the table to calm herself. If she had known that Ingrid would be visiting her mother that morning, she would not have gone.

Gudrun's appearance seconds later makes her feel a necessary lightness that had been elusive. The older woman's eyes light up and she opens her arms to her without hesitation.

-Maria-she exclaims affectionately, smiling at her-you always give me surprises.

-Well, I told you my chickens were overproducing-Mapi sings, returning the smile slightly.

-You are a sun, kjære Maria.

Mapi snorts at the compliment.

-Mamma, a coffee?

Gudrun says no, sits down and invites Mapi in, chatting animatedly about the approaching pleasant summer, the cool nights and the garden that had the most beautiful colors.

Mapi feels Ingrid's presence at all times. She doesn't speak, but she is there, drinking her coffee slowly, leaning against the kitchen counter. She couldn't even refuse and tell her that she didn’t drink anything other than tea, that would have seemed rude.

-Your visit is very timely. You're going to take a cake that I just made, you'll finish it in no time!

The muffled sound coming from Ingrid's spot makes them both turn to look at her.

-Betrayal, mamma-she murmurs without a trace of malice because the corners of her mouth are slightly raised-It's my favorite cake! Won't I even have a small piece?

-We can be good to Maria, right, Ingrid?

-No need, Gudrun, really-Mapi denies, not wanting to create any kind of discord.

-Of course, Ingrid can eat it any other day! Anyway, she keeps saying that she has to stop eating my food because then her clothes won't fit.

-Oh, mor-murmurs the black-haired, shaking her head, clearly embarrassed.

Mapi refrains from adding anything, saying something much more embarrassing like how good her figure looks after two children or how fit she is. Instead, she looks at the coffee at her side and wishes she could take a sip, a small one like she used to like to take, but she pushes the thought aside and ignores the cup.

-I'll take a slice, Gudrun, don't be offended. It's too much for me alone-she says diplomatically.

-Are you still living alone in that remote place?

-You know I do-the Spanish woman answers through clenched teeth because it's the same old conversation.

-Well, I thought you might already have a boyfriend...or a girlfriend-the last sentence comes out with more force and intention, or so it seems, Mapi's cheeks are already turning red. The worst thing is the sudden cough that shakes Ingrid just as she drank the last of her coffee and the very significant look her mother gives her.

Ingrid apologizes and quickly cleans up.

-I don't have one-is all Mapi answers in a serious tone, not wanting to go into it further. And she feels like a fool for answering so long afterward when it wasn't even necessary.

Gudrun may have already realized that she is a lesbian, or maybe not. Mapi does not talk openly about her personal life even though she considers her a friend, and even less about her love life, a non-existent love life for quite some time, if she has to be realistic.

But Mapi knows that she herself can represent the lesbian stereotype to the point, something that has never been relevant or bothersome to her, covered in tattoos and muscles, playing soccer, and with two cats for pets. They wouldn't find a better stereotype in all of Norway, she was sure, but there was no need to air it in front of Ingrid, not that she cares, right? Nor was there any need to give her a coughing fit over information she didn't need to know.

Gudrun invites her to the garden and even to lunch and Mapi gives her the usual answer and rushes out. Ingrid excuses herself again to take a call and leaves the room.

'Stop staring at her' is all Mapi thinks as she sets limits for herself.

Gudrun's keen gaze never leaves her, and she might very well throw her out of the house in a heartbeat if she saw the way she watches her daughter, one who can neither observe nor desire nor anything of the sort.

-I don't know if I'll see you next week or if Ingrid will come to pick up the kids. Do you promise to stop by here sometime?

The prospect of seeing Ingrid any longer makes a huge knot in her stomach. She's a little dazzled by a beautiful woman, she can't deny it, and that's all, nothing too dangerous. Beautiful women are a weakness, and who isn't?

-I'll do my best-is all he answers.

-I'll never get any promises out of you, I can see that- laughs Gudrun, finishing wrapping the piece of cake-that you enjoy it with a big cup of tea.

-Thank you, Gudrun, you are too kind.

She says goodbye to the Norwegian and can't help but glance back, hoping to catch a last glimpse of Ingrid, which she doesn't get and she isn't disappointed either. She starts the car and drives off very quickly.

♣♣♣♣♣♣♣

-Maria just left, it's a shame you didn't get to say goodbye.

Ingrid enters the kitchen and the first thing she notices is the untouched cup of coffee where Mapi was sitting.

-Mamma-is Ingrid's warning, unimpressed by Gudrun's matchmaking attempts.

-What, kjære? -and the worst thing is that Gudrun is not subtle or anything like that, even if she tries to pretend it. She is louder than she thinks about it.

-You know what I'm talking about-Ingrid rolls her eyes-You asked her if she has a girlfriend, how subtle is that?

-Oh, Ingrid, it was a casual question.

-Of course! Shall I repeat your elegant words from, I don't know, two or three months ago? -Ingrid exclaims ironically-'I know a lesbian girl I want to introduce you to because you might like her'. Now I understand that you were talking about her. And I'm telling you now to stop it.

-She's very pretty, why wouldn't you like her?

Her mother is right about that, although she won't admit it. Maria has a strange beauty, soft, nothing too striking, but that undeniably must make people look at her without hesitation. Not that she would do it, of course not, because she likes other types of women. But she has eyes to be able to objectively say that loose brown hair suits her as well as that tight bun she wore in training and that she is pretty in her own way.

-It doesn't work like that, mamma. It's not about her being a lesbian and me being a lesbian and that... uniting us in some way-Ingrid grows impatient with her mother and the logic she uses to find her a partner-so get those ideas out of your head, please.

-We never see you with anyone, Ingrid, I thought a gentle push would help you.

-I like to keep my affairs private-she clarifies, and that's like adding fuel to the fire-and right now, honestly, I don't have time for romance or for... anything. Much less with her, she's not my type.

-Your siblings are settled now, they have children-says Gudrun as if that would really change his mind, and it achieves the opposite.

-They are not my goals, mamma, and so you understand, no matter how hard I try with a woman, I can't give you grandchildren either.

-Oh, Ingrid, please-Gudrun's disgusted face brings out a mocking laugh from the blac-haired, and maybe just like that, she'll leave that matter alone and forgotten.

Ingrid goes upstairs to take a shower, still amused by Gudrun's ideas and the matchmaking attempts (and failures) she's tried throughout her life. She's always compared her life to her siblings, and while Ingrid doesn't mind it at all, it can get too overwhelming at times. She's very content with where she is at the moment and has no interest in changing her status or getting involved in anything serious. She doesn't really have the time or the will to put in the effort, and she figures a relationship requires it, it must be more demanding than even work is. So that can definitely wait.

And now, work-along with her sister, nephew and niece-is all she thinks about and takes up her time.

Frido, her bussines partner and best friend, called with the best news. They finally managed to close the deal-verbally for the moment-with the owner of a piece of land they had yet to secure, and that cheers her up for the rest of the day. She was eager for some good news.

She was moving closer to family, not work, but she was able to juggle the two.

They had been planning a large real estate development project for quite some time to be carried out there in Melhus related to tourism and leisure, and it was finally going to start. The town needed movement, life, more work and activities, and the project with Frido was going to achieve that. Slowly they acquired the land and they already had everything on track.

They plan to go out for drinks in Trondheim that night, after all it is Saturday, and celebrations never hurt.

But before heading straight to the bar, she stops by her older sister Ada's house, where she lives with her husband Karl and her children Oscar and Frida. She adores the children, especially Frida, who is her goddaughter and needs attention, help and understanding.

It is largely because of them that she decided to leave the Oslo office in Frido's hands and open an office in Trondheim. She wants to be there for her family. Her sister is seriously ill, and both children do not fully understand it, the illness, the treatment, the hours and hours in the clinic, not knowing if she could be cured, the little time she can devote to them.

Seeing them cry for her, because they need her, breaks Ingrid's heart. They are too young to go through so much pain.

So, she is there to support them and her parents as well. The family is close, and she does not see it as a sacrifice, leaving her life in the capital, she can travel and come and go whenever she considers it essential. And Anders, her little brother who lives in Denmark, was there for a few days at the beginning of the month.

So yes, all her time is taken up by family and work, thinking about anything else is crazy. And beyond that, she hates the idea, losing her freedom, giving herself to another person, being emotionally dependent… it's not for her.

Flirting occasionally, letting off steam with a pretty, willing girl, that's what she does.

Oscar hits the ball again and again while Frida tries to block it when Ingrid arrives. She watches them for a while until they notice her and run excitedly. She loves seeing them like this, devoid of their usual sadness, playing as they should, laughing and running.

-Tante Ingrid-asks Frida-will you play with us?

-Look, I'm a danger with the ball-she warns in a playful tone-but because of how badly I hit it. Watch your face.

This makes the two children laugh and nod in amusement.

After a few minutes of sweating more than usual and shaking as if she had never exercised before, she begs for mercy and time to drink water.

-What position do you play, Oscar?

-I want to be a striker. Although I also like to prevent goals and Coach Maria teaches me how to block opponents, but I always watch videos of Haaland, and he scores goals! So, I guess I haven't decided yet.

-Well, Haaland is a good role model and he's Norwegian-agrees Ingrid, quite impressed-and you, Frid?

-I don't know- the girl answers with a certain shyness, one that she usually puts aside with her.

-It's okay not to know and just go have fun. Do you both have fun training?

They both nod quickly, very convinced.

-Coach Maria is cool-says Oscar.

-Yes, she holds my hand and... she never pressures me-Frida murmurs sincerely-I like her.

Ingrid is no longer surprised. Both her sister and brother-in-law are very pleased with the decision to send them to training and although they started later than the other children, Ingrid knows that they are doing well.

Oscar was enthusiastic from the beginning and Frida not so much, but not for lack of taste, but rather for having to see and deal with so many children. She is very shy, and this has worsened recently with her mother's illness.

On top of everything, Karl has nothing but praise for Maria and how much the two children grow attached to her.

Ingrid witnessed it the day before, she spent a few minutes just watching, and Frida was so uninhibited and talkative while receiving all the attention of the trainer, smiling sweetly and answering things that brought bubbly laughter from her niece.

Maria. She seemed to be quite the novelty in the community, or so said her mother, who kept telling her how they bumped into each other at the market one day and from there a friendship was born.

Nobody knew much about her, but for Ingrid she is not a big mystery or very difficult to decipher. She must be a typical woman bored with her life who decides to try something different in another country. It is not that being a children's trainer was something common but surely she knew something about the subject and teaching children must not be very complicated. One thing leads to another and she ended up there.

Ingrid shakes her head, dismissing thoughts of the petite woman, and enters the house to greet Ada and chat for a while.

Later, with her jeans slightly stained with grass, she enters the busy bar where Frido is already waiting at a secluded table. It is a small celebration between the two of them.

-Ingrid Engen disheveled? -the blonde mocks.

-I was in Ada´s house- is all the explanation she gives-what do we drink?

-Something to toast.

They toast, order some snacks and talk about all the details that need to be polished.

-We will have a better celebration in Oslo when the last seller's signature is a fact. Are you in? -says Frido.

-I don't think I can, everything is a bit chaotic around here. But you can celebrate without me, I give you permission.

Frido murmurs something in Swedish about good luck and Ingrid does the same in Norwegian. Their friendship dates back to their university days when they were in the same year studying the same degree and they thought about starting a business while waiting to graduate, a precarious and uncertain business in real estate. Well, Frido's father was a great help, but then the two of them knew how to direct it and make it bigger. Now, almost ten years later, they had one of the most solid and best positioned companies in the sector, which was growing exponentially.

Nothing was achieved without hard work, and they knew about that.

-Mr. Hansen is very interested in you talking to the woman who lives in his cabin-says Frido, eating an olive absentmindedly-he really insisted on it, apparently his daughter appreciates her a lot and you know her. Caroline Graham Hansen, perhaps?

-Yes, Caro, we were very good friends growing up, then life distanced us but we keep in touch-confirms Ingrid-in part the reason Mr. Hansen is selling us the property is due to that friendship, I assured him that we are going to do something good with the land, why do you want me to talk to the woman who is living there?

-To see if you can give her time to find new accommodation.

-Oh, I hate dealing with that-Ingrid mumbles and gives Frido her best puppy dog look-when are you going back to Oslo?

-Mmm-is all Frido mutters-I guess I have to take care of it.

-Please?

-OK.

-We'll talk about it on Monday, maybe we can give the woman some time, out of consideration for Caro.

They continue drinking calmly, occasionally glancing at people.

-If you're going to go with that brunette who's been making eyes at you since you walked in, tell me quickly so I don't end up alone and looking like a fool.

-I thought Simon would accompany you.

-I wanted us to celebrate it among ourselves.

-He's a fool, and I'm not going to go with the brunette-Ingrid denies-I think I just want to get home early. This week left me dead.

-All the more reason-Frido points out.

-I'm not up to it and old women don't attract my attention-Ingrid shrugs-I'll leave it for when I have some time in Oslo.

-I heard you say that a few weeks ago-the blonde laughs-I think all the women in the city are crying because of your recent indifference.

-Exaggerated-says Ingrid.

But just half an hour later she is accepting the brunette's invitation to have a few drinks at her place because after all she is single, free of ties and she is in the mood for a little fun.