inferno of chasing stars

James Potter was in the same home he'd been in all his life, at the same dining table and in the same kitchen he'd been in ten years ago the only difference is the war raging on outside his home and his steadily rising age. he felt the same nostalgia he had felt last year when Sirius moved out and into a flat with Remus. 

As James sat reminiscing all the time he had spent in this house his mother yelled a warning of a loud and excitable Sirius tearing his way throughout the house to him. the warning his mother yelled to him was not enough for the force of which Sirius bounded into him smiling at with all his black charm. Sirius always did have a charm that was unparalleled to almost everyone, he was almost as tall as James himself but contrasted completely with his pale skin and long dark wavy hair that made him seem paler. Sirius had Piercing grey eyes so light they could be blue and long eyelashes that drew more attention to his cheekbones and the sharp bone structure he had inherited from the black family. However looking at the beauty Sirius held never compared to his brother who was so similar yet so different  in every way. 

James was snapped from his trance as Sirius flicked his ear laughing  at the way his face scrunched up in pain. Shoving Sirius before pulling him to sit in the oak dining table to wait for breakfast that was likely  being prepared  by his mother on the other side of the room, sitting in the armchair at the head of the table that his father usually occupied James watched Sirius fidget with excitement bobbing up and down on his chair. 

"What is it?" Sirius' smile widened is possible and jumped up from his seat bounding over to James to drag him from his seat, James smiled as his on caramel coloured hand was taken in Sirius' and yanked. With Sirius yanking his arm he reluctantly  stood and let himself be dragged into ballroom dancing around the orange kitchen laughing with his mum as she stopped what she was doing to spin in circles  around James and Sirius. 

James laughed and smiled while they danced watching his mum with all the love he had for the woman she had the same tanned complexion James himself with long honey coloured  hair and beautiful brown eyes that comforted anyone in her presence. James thought his mum was beautiful in every way possible and she was all anyone wanted in a mum and deserved. She was the type of mum who raised a child that wasn't even hers because that child deserved better, she was a woman who had boundless love and energy even at the age of 58. 

Sirius suddenly spun James into his mums arms making James laugh his heart warming earth shattering laugh. He then realised the ridiculousnesses of dancing in the middle of a war spinning his mum one last time as his smile faded. he kissed his mums cheek and turned back to an elated Sirius. 

"Prongs guess what! guess whaaaat!" Sirius was practically jumping with joy joining James back at the table where James laughed slightly turning to the photos on the wall of their ever growing family. it started with just his mother and father and then there was James, Marlene and Peter and then Sirius and the year after that joined Remus after that in their final year joined lily. 

"Prongs!" Sirius all but screamed in his ear still vibrating from head to toe with excitement. James rolled his eyes nocked from his daze and gestured for Sirius to continue. 

"Mary and Lily are going to have a baby James! a baby! isn't it amazing" Sirius was beaming and you could see the mix of pride and excitement in his eyes. A baby that is amazing even if we are in a war, and James couldn't hide his joy and pride for the couple. it was truly amazing the way the couple had gotten this far, Lily helped Mary after she was attacked by Barty Crouch Jr, Evan Rosier and Severus and Snape. Mary also helped Lily accept finding out in sixth year that James no longer loved her the way she had hoped and helped her the rejection from her family after finding out that Mary and lily were dating. James was incredibly proud of the couple and could never restrain the happiness he felt for them. 

"Padfoot this is amazing! I'm so proud of them oh my god a baby!" James exclaimed happiness and excitement taking over his body, James jumped up from his chair dancing around the room as she was making oats Upma at the stove. "A baby" James sang laughing as he danced his way back to his seat where Sirius was beaming at James from his chair.

Sirius was flushed in the cheeks as he nodded his head at James making his long black hair bounce. "I'm so proud of them, from Mary comforting Lily about you to the both of them living together waiting for a baby! I'm so, so, so happy James" Sirius' smile shone as his voice waivers with emotions. James smiled back not quite knowing what to say. His mum made her way to the table sitting opposite Sirius holding three bowls of Upma, she was positively beaming at her two sons as happy as they were. 

"I always knew lily would love fiercely and strongly and it seems that Mary does too, isn't it just lovely though my first grandbaby" Euphemia's honey soft voice reached his ears and if possible his smile widened he always did love his mothers voice. as he was about to reply to his mothers comment he heard the tapping on the window to his right, it was an owl. it was a tall screech owl with bright beckoning orange eyes and he looks to be sent mere hours before. Fearing the worst James rushed from his seat wand-lessly he opened  the window on his way allowing the owl to travel the few only a little more to reach James. James took the letter from the owls tallens and looked at the address, he'd know that writing anywhere and that is what nocked all the wind from his lungs and made his hand shake violently. 

Jams sunk to the floor, he could no longer hear Sirius and his mum as they speculated who would be the godparents, all James did was stare at this letter hoping the contents weren't dreadful or heartbreaking. So he took a shaky breath and broke the wax seal and unfolded the tear stained letter. 

          My dearest James 

 my loving Patroclus there is so much to ay and never the time or the ink

i hope you know jour maddening, i fell for you in my forth year and your fifth year since then you've consumed my every though. doesn't that sound maddening?

your arrogance and beauty didn't make sense to me until i found the truth in everything you say and do. you are the boy with arrogance the size of the great lake but with the heart to match. you're my sun beating down your warmth and melting the cold that spread through my skin like the beginnings of spring. The good you brought me to believe in, even though i ended our love to keep us safe, has continued in everything i've done since my sixth year. when i was thrown into Voldomorts allegiance i began my best to find a way to destroy Voldomort. 

that's when i found out about the horcruxe's, a hocrux is a dark object created by splitting ones soul through methods i wont tell you to give the creator of it immortality, he's made 7 i am already in possession of 5 one i cannot reach. It is mere minutes before i get the sixth horcrux and leave them to you Sirius and Remus to destroy, i have witnessed pure hatred in this world and i have contributed by standing along with those who created it i regret my decision to stand with my parents but i know then what i know now it was imperative to the life he wishes to live today. my only hope is in the next life to be as brave as my star describes me to be. 

i have missed you all these years James, Sirius too and i wished to give you both a life free of this damned war. though it was hard letting you go i couldn't let you destroy yourself for me i don't think i could survive that, thank you for making me see reason about my parents and of the life id have been dammed to with them. i am truly glad that Walburga and Orion have began to rot, i just know they are rolling it they're graves at this very moment. 

i would do anything for you James you know that and i know exactly what you'd ask of me if you were here right now but i don't want to swim the ocean, i don't want to fight the tide i don't want to swim forever so when its cold id like to die.

i am going to go to this cave and join the inferni i've left everything i own toy both you and Sirius 

            with love and forever yours 

                your achilles Regulus 

a sob tore through James throat as he started to gain back his senses his own tears had added to Regulus' on the page his own breathing was growing more ragged. his mother clutched him holding him tightly, comforting  him through what? she didn't know. the letter was torn from his fingers by Sirius who was none the wiser to the brother in danger across the country but the brother here with him in such distress he'd never seen. James watched as Sirius read the letter growing more distressed and angry as he read. 

"Firstly fuck you James" Sirius took deep breaths as he watched his brother being held by his adoptive mum his heart fracturing into small bits before him. Sirius watched as James wailed and clutched at Euphemia who was still quite confused and worried about her sons. Fleamont rushed into the room called by his wife looking worried at the what he'd walked into. Fleamont was on his knees in moments holding his wife and son just as confused as he looked up at Sirius. However James could care less what they were doing right now he felt like he'd been torn from the inside out. His Achilles is giving up, his Achilles was sacrificing himself. James continued to wail and sob into his parents as Sirius stood by them and watched his mind loud and his desperation to save his brothers evident as well as his anger. 

through his burning eyes James watched as Sirius knelt in front of him bringing his hands to the side of James' face. " let’s go then James"

"What" James muttered back still in the depths of his panic. but Sirius wouldn't let him do that so he was dragged to his feet by a determined Sirius. "Padfoot it's too late he's gone " James wailed, Sirius dragged him forward slamming his body into James and squeezed James so hard he didn't think he'd be able to breathe ever again. But that was okay James didn’t want to be able to breathe without Regulus, he was his achilles the boy smart as a whip and sarcastic as they come, his regulus that made his heart double in size, his Regulus that he couldn't and wouldn't live without. 

James let out a shaky breath deciding to just do as Sirius told him too. "okay Padfoot let's go look for him then" James voice was hoarse and sore making his voce crack but Sirius paid no mind. 

"Mum, dadi bet your'e confused its all in the letter but right no we are going to get my brother and make a plan" Sirius spoke with determination and that was the end of any brewing conversation that may have started as he called out for kreacher. 

"Kreacher take us to regulus please and stay with us until we have him safe please" the old elf sneered at Sirius but listened to him anyway and apparated them away. the tug that bought to Sirius' and James stomach was nothing compared to what they saw when they got to Regulus' last destination. 

it was a cave almost completely drenched in darkness illuminated by a low green light. this hill in a cave surrounded with water so black it was almost like looking into space. this place was dread and death itself, this is just the place to come in books as the underrated hero which if James and Sirius weren't so distressed they'ed laugh at. there was a thrashing sound behind them, when they turned there was a view so nauseating that James could have been sick at the sight if he wasn't frozen to the spot. It was Regulus, his achilles, regulus looked almost transparent and his face is the picture of horror with blood on his neck as he fought the beast that had its claws in him.

there was something dragging him towards the depths of the murky black water. There was no fear that James had felt this deeply, James felt the panic in his bones as his bones

Sirius the picture of bravery in moments of fear sprung into action as soon as he'd seen his brother still breathing and scratching and fighting to make it away from that thing dragging him, it had skin stretched over it though it had no face, it was just a skeletal body with skin over it and razor sharp nails. looking at this thing that must be inferni was looking at decay looking at what would be regulus' death had Sirius not taken action so quickly. 

"Kreacher!" Sirius screeched and James lurched forward holding one of kreachers hands as well as grabbing hold of regulus hoping to merlin that he wouldn't get splinched. and kreacher apparated the three of them away creating the tug in James stomach and twisted him around until they landed in a heap on the floor of number 12 Grimwald place. a house that was now Regulus' it looked different now James knew because it was not the same as Sirius described anymore. But thats not what James was worried about right now, he was worried about Regulus. 

So as quickly as was possible for James who is now dazed and his glasses askew he crawled over to where Regulus was groaning. when James did reach Regulus he gathered him in his lap brushing his curls, that were far longer than he remembered, away from his face seeing a few long scratches along his arms and his neck But James didn't mind that he could heal them later, he was worried if Regulus was awake. 

he was. 

"My achilles" James murmured as he lent down to kiss his cheek. James sat like this a long time cradling Regulus who's half on his lap half on the floor and Sirius sat beside him his emotions hitting James over and over like a tsunami. 

"my patroclus" Regulus murmurs.