lux in teberius

Walking through these halls will never not hurt Remus. Hogwarts is his home. It was his home for so long, but walking through these halls? Even the happy memories hurt, the happiest memory’s with James, with Lily, with Peter… with Sirius. The pain of the bad memories eat him up to. The sorry he never got. The fear from one person he didn’t want scared of him. The prank. And yet? He still smiles fondly, these halls he grew up in shaped him as a person more than the war ever did and all these emotions made him incredibly tired. He just wanted to sleep, the magic of the castle hugging him like an old friend but walking down to his quarters he passed a staircase to the basement, he’s really about to put the mental in sentimental.

“Enter” the voice behind the wall drawled and fuck that hurt so much more than the memories. He’s here, alive and behind this door yet here Remus is, hesitating. He hesitated so long that Snape opened said door a few moments later, “I swear if this was a prank-“ He cuts himself off. Remus snaps out of it, a wand is pointed at his face though it’s slowly being lowered and who he’d feared to face is right in front of him.

“Professor Lupin.”  He steps out further, looks around the corridor – for students who could be listening in – before he steps back a few and hold the door, “Do come in.” He wasn’t being sarcastic but it was something close to it.

Snape sits back behind his desk, his personal potions Grimoire out open on the desk in front of him. The room smelt of potion ingredients, the ones smells he never could fully scrub out the cauldrons, the ones he’s definitely become nose blind too, it also smells like something that gives Remus an idea of what to say now that he’s actually here. “I wanted to thank you.”

Now the potions professor was the hesitant one, though not just anyone would be able to tell but Remus knows Snape, “Thank me for?” Eyes questioning, accusing, afraid of what Remus might say next, he raised an arched brow at the other professor. Remus would have to choose his next words very carefully, like talking to a small frightened animal that might run away at a quick movement.

“for the wolfsbane, I appreciate it greatly” Remus tried to smile like he normally does but seeing as Snape’s scowls deepens he falters.

“I didn’t do it out of the kindness of my heart, Lupin” He spat the name like venom yet it never did have the effect on Remus that Snape always hoped it did.

“Of course not” He laughed out, probably a bit too freely but his mask slipped at the all too familiar banter with the man, “I know you don’t have one of those.” It wasn’t rude, snape knew that, Heard that. It was doting.

He tried to ignore it, of course he did. They can’t do this again, Severus knows they shouldn’t do this again and yet Remus knew the minute he saw the man, he had to try again. So, Snape mustered up all the Slytherin pride he had, “Is that all then professor? I am a very busy man should you care to know and would like to get on with it.”

There it is. His opening. “Of course, sorry to disturb you.” The smile never faded. His Gryffindor bravery flared up, the fire of his house pushing him to his fate and he opened the door. looking back over his shoulder at the man watching him gently, “It was nice to see you again Severus.”

Then he left, closing the door behind him.

~

It was warm in front of the fire place, The usually loud common room, quite and at ease, Harry was sat in the main area of the common room near the end of the day, everyone else were in the dorms – sleeping or getting ready for bed. He was reading a small book on ‘Heirs and their duties’, it wasn’t too informative which was unfortunate, he really does want to learn more about what he’s meant to be doing. The book does have small pieces of information like how heirs greet each other and higherups but not the specific duties, Harry guesses they change depending on the house but that means he’d need a guide that knows the traditions and duties for each house he’s too inherit. The thought to ask Dumbledore flashes in his mind for a moment before he remembers what that man did. It be wise for him to not be alone with the head master for too long, yes but more importantly, Dumbledore shouldn’t find out Harry lost the blocks on his magic or that he’s planning on taking up his seats.

The door closes and Harry, quite ungracefully, slams the book shut and sits on it. He turns around trying not to cringe when he see’s Neville eyeing him suspiciously. “I had that book when I was little, you’re picking up your seat then?” he seemed almost excited, how’d Neville of all people know he had one?

“What?”

“Oh! Heir Longbottom, a pleasure.” He bowed his head politely, his grin wide at Harry baffled expression. “No one knows I’m picking up my seat but Susan, they think there’s a different heir for the oh so noble House of Longbottom, but I plan of revealing myself in a year or so.”

“Oh merlin I’m so glad I was nice to you- uh oh yeah, Heir Potter, the pleasures all mine. I just found out I had the seat, I have a few actually but I won’t go into specifics” Harry smiled back, his awkward dopy smile.

Neville laughed at that, “I’m glad you were nice to me too. So I’m the first to know then?” genuinely curious due to Harry’s reaction when he walked in.

“Yes. The first and only for a while Neville, you can’t tell anyone.” His serious look sparked something in the other, something deeply caring.

“Harry what happened…?”

“I can’t tell you here, someone could be listening.” He whispered as he pulled out his invisibility cloak – vaguely wondering why he hadn’t used it while reading but he was never the Raven. “come.”

Neville ran over and sat next to Harry on the sofa, the cloak was placed over them and harry cast a silencing charm. He told Neville everything: the blocks, the compulsion charms and how they had to be placed by Dumbledore, how they made him reckless and trust Dumbledore, how they forced him to never befriend anyone closely apart from 2 Gryffindor’s who honestly had been pissing him off lately (well mainly only one of them-), how if those blocks had stayed on him till he was 17 when he was of age and his family magic would have been properly unlocked to him he would’ve exploded. Literally, burst into flames killing him and anyone nearby and finally how he thinks this was the headmasters plan to be rid of Voldemort and himself making Dumbledore the hero – again.

Neville took a minute to process this information, “Harry that’s illegal, to block someone magic and the compulsions. You could have him kissed for that! I know some good lawyers if you-”

“Thank you Nev, but I need to wait for the right moment, He thinks I need to die to kill Voldemort, I need to know why.” His tone strong he carried on, “And if you go to the law for me, I’ll know it was you. Not even Ron and Hermione know. I’m not so sure they won’t go behind my back to him nor am I certain if they didn’t that he couldn’t use them against me…” He looked off into the fire, pondering as he pulled off the cloak – he looked around in the silence as if he’d heard someone, he hadn’t but..

“Okay, I won’t but when the timing’s right, you have to go.” Looking to wear Harry’s eyes were drawn too, “You want me to write to my gran? She’s got the seat at the moment, legal guardian and all that, could probably tell you a bunch of helpful stuff and I swear she’d keep it a secret.” He smiled brightly once more. “Taught me everything I know, gran did. Even- Harry.”

He made eye contact with Neville and it felt like he was talking to Dumbledore, “Dude- what?”

“Oh my god you haven’t learn occlumency?!” the urgency in his voice struck something in Harry, “It’s a kind of protective field around your mind, keeps your thoughts in and others trying to read said thoughts out. If you can’t do it – well, you’ll never keep this from professor Dumbledore Harry, he’s known for using legilimency reading everyone’s mind and still being able to hold a full conversation!”

“Can you teach me?” Strong, unwavering but his tone was one of trust.

“Yeah of course! Learnt it before I came to Hogwarts, every family has secrets to protect and I’m quite good at it. Though no one tries to read my thoughts, no need too, not yet.” He saw Harry over thinking and quickly reassured, “Look Harry, don’t make eye contact with him for now and you’ll be fine. Legilimency needs eye contact.”

The fear Harry previously had of Dumbledore already reading his mind disappeared, he hadn’t spoken to the headmaster and now he knows what to do. He walked upstairs before Neville, thanking him for all his help. As he sat down on his bed in the unusually quiet room a curtain drew open on his left, “Harry-“ It was Ronald.

“Harry look” He wasn’t whispering and Harry had half the mind to cast another mufflito so his dormmates wouldn’t wake up at Ron’s selfishly loud cry, “He’s dying! He has to be, poor Scabbers being chased by that mean cat! He’s too old for this Harry!”

Honestly Harry himself was baffled, what did Ron want him to do about it?! “Take him to Madam Pomfrey? Maybe she can heal animals too or something-“

Ron nodded like Harry had given him the best idea in the world, had he really not thought about that? He gives a single nod back anyway as he shuffles himself back into bed, closing the curtains that get locked in place by his charms (stuck permanently on said curtains). His head hits the pillow and he drifts off to sleep.

~

Harrys first class that next Tuesday was finally his favourite, the reason he was so upset as he walked there wasn’t because of what class he had, no of course as he was walking there – from behind him all he could hear was bickering from his mates. Hemione’s cat had been laying on Harry’s bed when we woke up that morning, and when he was sat in the great hall with Neville, Ron came down to where he was sat and just complained. Harry was starting to get a headache so he was ever grateful when Neville snagged his hand and pulled him away from the yelling pair to stand near the front with him.

“Merlin do they ever stop?” He asked not so innocently, smiling when he saw that had gotten a soft laugh out of Harry. “Oh look Harry, be carefully with how you treat the Slytherin’s this year now that – well you know.” He giggled a nervous habit and looked back to the front.

Harry on the other hand looked over to where Malfoy was eyeing him curiously, Harry knew he had a different air about him but only those really in tune with their own magic could recognise his, He feared Malfoy might be one of them. Speaking of his magic, he was excited to try out his magic in this class where he could really let loose. He picked up spells so much easier in transfiguration yesterday and he knew it was because he could actually feel his magic now, plus he was studying and meditating. He closed his eyes and took a deep breathe, trying to make it look like the 2 / 3 of the golden trio were just annoying him (They were), when really he was trying to tap into his magic to heal his headache first then to use for this class.

The man from the train stepped forward, His scar more prominent in the light and Harry felt they could bond over it – his lightning scar grew as he got older, it started just the ‘iconic’ scar when he was a baby to branching out all over the right side of his face, no one seemed to notice how it grew every year.

“Right, hello everyone!” He started out his introduction strong but his tone was not mean, in fact it was so friendly a lot of people this year would probably treat him more like a friend than a professor, “I’m Professor Lupin and welcome to defence against the dark arts.” Everyone applauded even though the speech wasn’t much of a speech at all and Harry knew there this is the best teacher he’s had.

Lupin taught them about boggarts, what they are how to spot them from your actual worst fear should you face one in the wild and then how to win against one. “A simple spell we will learn to help but laughter is what really gets the boggart. The spell is Riddikulus and I want you all to say it with your whole chest okay? Ready? Riddikulus!”

“Riddikulus!” The class chorused after him.

“Very good! Try again just one more time, Riddikulus!”

“Riddikulus!!” The class was louder and very into this lesson, they all loved this teacher it seemed but a quite voice to the left of Harry quickly drew him out of it.

“This class is Ridiculous.” Malfoy rolled his eyes as he spoke and the Slytherins in the room all laughed, a rare sight that clearly did not impress the new professor.

“If you think that way why don’t you go first Mr Malfoy?” He watched as Malfoy stay completely still like the professor was a t-rex and showing the class his greatest fear would be the worst fate he could encounter. “Exactly. Ah Mr Longbottom, what do you fear the most – or who?” He looked at Neville expectantly while Harry nudged his side with his elbow comfortingly.

“Uhm- p-professor Snape?” He stuttered as he spoke, he was never very good at speaking infront of lots of people, and while the Slytherins laughed mockingly Lupin laughed like Neville had just made the funniest inside joke but then Neville changed his answer. “Oh wait uhm it might be Bellatrix.” His face turned white as he spoke, “Yeah uhm Bellatrix- Lestrange…” The class went silence, even the Slytherins couldn’t find the humour in the death-eater that tortured the boys parents.

Lupins eyes softened, “Yes I would imagine she is quite frightening.. You also have a grandmother yes? The one you live with?” It sounded like it was changing the subject but somehow Neville knew-

“Yeah, but I wouldn’t want it to turn into her either-“ He was joking, Neville who just spoke about the women who tortured his parents to the brink of madness was making a joke. Harry laughed of course, even when no one else did because he had no idea who Bellatrix was.

“No no, of course not.” He went up to Neville and whispered something that no one else heard then to the cupboard that seemed to be rocking back and forth quite violently. Then he opened it and out walked a women with crazy hair and a deranged look in her eyes. Then it’s times like this Harry remembers Neville’s in Gryffindor for a reason.

He looked at her unflinchingly and cast it, “Riddikulus!” She didn’t change, not much but suddenly she was wearing the weirdest set of clothes Harry had ever seen and a had with a whole bird just glued on top! Everyone but Malfoy was laughing and Harry didn’t have enough time to wonder why, because while everyone was laughing Lupin made everyone form a line.

Loads of people went before Harry did and no one but Neville and Lupin paid attention to what Harry’s bogart would be and well a certain blond at the back of the room who would not be participating. He stood ready still snickering from the girl that went before him and pointed his wand at the bogart, it was still changing when Harry was shoved out the way by Lupin, “Riddikulus” he muttered under his breath and what might have been a moon turned into a balloon was thrown into the cupboard.

“Sorry everyone, out times up! I’ll see you all next time” His smile wide as everyone was still laughing about todays lesson, he looked at Harry once more an apologetic look in his eye like he didn’t expect his boggart to be whatever it was, Lupin is tall and when he jumped in front of the tanned boy he completely blocked his line of sight – Harry had no idea what his boggart is.