Never Saw You Coming

James shot out of his bed before his eyes were open fully. 

Startling a snoozing Sirius out of his peaceful rest. 

“James! What the hell are you doing? The sun isn’t even up yet!” 

James looked to his bedroom window. Huh. So it wasn’t. He hadn’t even noticed. 

But there was no sleeping now. 

Today is the day. 

He couldn’t contain the excitement. Humming as he stood in the shower. Scrubbing his body clean of sadness. 

He dressed and hopped back into the hallway. 

There was no one. 

The whole house was still asleep. 

The sun had only just starting to make its appearance below the horizon. The sky looked ablaze with pink and purple pastels in the background and firey orange streaks cutting across them. 

James took a deep breath. Smiling to himself. 

Summer was finally over. 

Walburga didn’t end up taking Regulus to the station. 

She never showed up to the house that morning at all. 

“Kreacher was told to tell Master Regulus that Master Regulus’ cousin will be accompanying him to the train station.” 

“My cousin?” Regulus asked confused. 

“Narcissa of the Noble and most Ancient house of Black, sir.” 

Oh. This day was already 10 times better. None of his mother. And all of his favorite people. 

Narcissa arrived not long after Regulus woke. He gathered all this things. 

“Ready to go?” She asked smiling. 

“More than I have ever been.” He replied. Walking past her out the front door into the sun. 

God he had missed the sun. 

Going outside in the summer just made him sad. So he didn’t. And the black out curtains in his bedroom helped tremendously with this pursuit. 

But his body did not like the depletion of vitamin D. It begged him to go outside. Regulus ignored it. 

And now he felt his skin tingle under the warmth of the light. It flipped a switch in him. It turned on the dusty lights in his soul. And he could see everything much clearer. 

The agony of not seeing his favorite person seemed to dissipate and transform into anticipation and excitement. 

The smile that broke out across his face threatened to turn into a joyous bubbly laugh. 

Then Cissy held out her arm, silently asking him to take it. As soon as he laid his arm over hers. They were gone. 

Instantly transported to the entrance of the platform. 

Regulus was now staring at the blank brick wall that separated him and his future. 

“Don’t dawdle, Regulus.” Cissy giggled walking towards the wall. “Wouldn’t want to keep your special someone waiting on the other side.” Regulus was glad that his agony amused her. 

“Don’t start, Narcissa.” He rolled his eyes following behind her and walking through the seemingly ordinary barrier. 

He was met on the other side with that, loud, bustling, beautiful train. 

He was already smiling again. 

“Okay, Mr. Black. I’m supposed to give you a speech.” Cissy said turning to him and trying to fix her face in seriousness. 

“‘Make the family proud, blah blah blah, more bullshit’ and my own request of you is have fun. Be young and alive. And get into trouble whenever you can.” She laughed. “Just not the life and death kind.” She tacked on for good measure. 

“Okay.” He laughed. “I promise to try my best.” 

“Good. Then you’re free to go.” She said turning back towards the train. 

“Okay” he replied. Mirroring her movement. 

But not stepping away from her. 

“Oh, Regulus.” She laughed. “It’s going to be okay.” 

But Regulus didn’t hear her. 

Because his eyes fell on his one and only solace in the life. 

His solar plexus. 

James was a sight for extremely sore eyes. He looked like magic in a person. Tall and tan and lean. He’d grown over the summer. Somehow becoming more enticing and gorgeous. 

James was scanning the crowd. Not finding what he was searching for. 

He’s looking for me. Regulus realized. 

God help him. His legs were going to give out right here. 

And then. 

And then James found him. 

Like he always did. 

Their eyes met and the smile that erupted on his the older boy’s face was enough to make Regulus’ whole year. 

He was staring directly into the sun. 

And James was just staring at him. Like he hung the stars in the sky. 

He was standing with his mother. And she seemed to have realized he was looking at someone. She followed his line of sight right to Regulus and his cousin. 

Mrs. Potter’s eyes widened like she was just told she won the lottery. 

“Narcissa!?” She exclaimed. 

Well, that was not what Regulus had been expecting at all. 

The older woman was hastily making her way though the tiny crowd of people between them. 

Regulus turned to his cousin and took in her face. She was shocked. But not unpleasantly so. 

“Euphemia!“ Cissy exclaimed. Then she had an arm full of Mrs. Potter. They were hugging. This was all very strange for Regulus to see. He could only watch with a surprised expression. 

“What are you doing here?” Effie asked. 

“Just dropping off my cousin.” Cissys eyes trailed to Regulus and must’ve been able to read his mind. 

“Regulus, this is Euphemia Potter. We met a while ago at a ministry dinner.” Regulus didn’t know Cissy still had friends outside the family. He was happy for her. 

Regulus finally met the woman’s eyes. 

He had been trying to avoid it, she was such an intimidating being. Even from a distance. 

But when he met her gaze, he only found a kind openness in them. 

“Regulus Black.” She said smiling at him. Never breaking eye contact. “It’s so lovely to finally meet you.” 

“Same to you, Mrs. Potter.” He said genuinely. As the name left his lips, his eyes seemed to want to wander to the other Potter. The one he wanted to lock himself away with and never let anyone have him again. 

James was standing behind his mother, smiling from ear to ear. When Regulus found his eyes, he realizes that James had been staring at him the entire time. 

“Call me Effie, please.” She insisted. “Regulus Black.” She repeated. “Do you have a middle name, Regulus Black?” Something in her eye was playful. 

“Yes.” He said confused and furrowing his brow slightly. But smiling small despite himself. “Arcturus.” 

A giggle was heard from behind Euphemia. James couldn’t help it. 

“Mhm. Excellent middle name.” Effie said. As if confirming something she had suspected. But she turned back to Cissy. “Narcissa, this is my son, James.” She smiled proudly. Putting her arm around his shoulders. Regulus could not blame her. James was definitely something to be proud of.

“James Potter. A pleasure at last.” Cissy said. Trying to use her instincts to get a reading on him. She held out her hand to shake. 

James took it cordially. Smiling. But his eyes flicked over to Regulus without meaning to. And Narcissa caught it. 

She smiled again. Wider this time. 

“Do you two know each other?” She said asked. 

After three silent beats, James was the one to respond. “Somewhat.” But his smile gave him away to everyone in attendance. 

“Well, it was nice to meet you James. I hope we see each other again in the future.” Narcissa said with sincerity. 

“I hope the same.” He smiled that dazzling smile. 

“Let’s leave them to say goodbye, James.” She ushered her son to turn. “Until we see each other again, Regulus.” She told him quietly with a private smile. 

Regulus isn’t even sure Cissy or James heard her with the crowd growing in size. He nodded at her.

For three beats he watches James and his mother’s retreating figures disappear into the crowd. 

“Regulus Black, you have been caught redhanded.”

Oh no. 

“Cissy. Please don’t make it worse.” His expression was pained. 

She was still laughing. “I’m never letting you forget it. Over achiever, James Potter?” More laughing. “I seriously can’t believe you. Your sense of humor is unmatched.” She paused to chuckle again. Then remembered “Oh! And when Sirius finds out, I pray for your safety.” 

“I’m leaving now. See you next summer, Cissy.” 

He started to walk away. 

“Yes you will. and I want to hear all about wonder boy.” She yelled slightly above average volume but knowing no one around would pay any attention. Regulus sprinted onto the train. 

James had already lost Padfoot and Moony but he couldn’t be arsed to care. 

He was looking for a pale boy with black hair. 

And he found him. 

In a crowd, Regulus shines the brightest. Just standing there, existing, like a vision of the future. 

The first thing he noticed was that Regulus was a tad paler than usual, which meant he definitely did not get enough sun. And he looked thinner than when James saw him last. 

Something in James’ heart cried out in anguish. 

And yet, Regulus was beautiful. His hair had grown longer than James had ever seen it. He had the sudden urge to run his hands through it, wrap the delicate dark curls around his finger. 

For just a moment James let his gaze lower. Regulus’ legs had gotten longer. He was getting taller and broader. 

He was fucking fit. 

James was pulled from his daydream when he heard his mother scream. 

“Narcissa!?” Before she was running full speed to the woman standing next to Regulus. 

His light in the darkness. 

James followed his mother hesitating making his presence known. 

He caught up just in time to see the blonde woman catch his mother in a hug. 

“What are you doing here?” His mother inquired. 

“Just dropping off my cousin.” Narcissa answered. She turned to Regulus then. 

“Regulus, this is Euphemia Potter. We met a while ago at a ministry dinner.”

It was such a strange experience for James. To have 2 worlds colliding. His mother who embodies his roots. His original home. And his other half. Who is James’ home anywhere. 

“Regulus Black.” His mother said. 

Oh no. 

He knew that tone of voice. His mother was about to become an investigator. 

“It’s so lovely to finally meet you.” 

James was watching Regulus’ response to his mothers bluntness. He wondered what his first impressions of her were. He wondered if they would get along. And then he assumed they would. His mother would discuss anything with anyone. But on the same train of thought, James realized Regulus would love Fleamont. They would never get enough of each other. Always on the quest for knowledge. Never relenting. 

“Same to you, Mrs. Potter.” Regulus had a real smile on his face. James thought maybe he liked her. 

“Call me Effie, please.” She insisted. “Regulus Black.” She repeated. 

She had the expression she always made when she was thinking about how to say what she wanted without revealing her intentions. “Do you have a middle name, Regulus Black?” 

It took James all of 2 seconds to realize that his mother had at least seen the sender of his letter over summer break. Otherwise she wouldn’t be asking. 

Don’t fall for it, baby Black. It’s a trap. He thought. 

He couldn’t help but smile as Regulus fell right in it with his eyes closed. 

“Yes.” The younger boy looked confused but always up to a challenge. James loved that about him. “Arcturus.” 

A laugh bubbled up out of James before he could help it. 

“Mhm. Excellent middle name.” Euphemia responded. Gears in her brain just turning away. 

Then she faced James suddenly.

“Narcissa, this is my son, James.” The son in question was wishing at that exact moment that the ground would swallow him whole. 

He didn’t want his mother trying to introduce him to his friend’s family like he was the winning horse. But he also could never refuse his mother anything. She loved him too unconditionally. 

“James Potter. A pleasure at last.” Cissy said. She and regulus had very similar facial structures. Small smiles that conveyed a lot. And wide eyes. Always calculating and observing. She stuck out her hand for him to shake. 

James took it happily. She didn’t seem like the other members of the most noble and ancient house of black. She seemed easy going and understanding. Like regulus. 

With the reminder to his mind that he was standing so close, he had to look at him. He had gone too long without looking at him already. 

It was always worth it. 

But the older Black seemed to see. 

And she was still smiling. So that’s a good sign. 

“Do you two know each other?” She said asked. 

James wanted to laugh. That was an interesting question to be sure. 

James knew Regulus like he knew his favorite song. And yet. He still managed to be surprised. He knew that he loved reading about love. But had never had someone give him the love he deserves. James knows Regulus hates black crows and thinks they’re the bully of the bird world. 

He knows that Regulus is the purest soul that he’s ever met. 

“Somewhat.” Was all he could say. But thinking of that beautiful boy made him smile like he was mad. 

“Well, it was nice to meet you James. I hope we see each other again in the future.” Narcissa told him. 

“I hope the same.” And he really did. He hoped that somewhere down the line, their paths would cross again. And they would remember this moment. 

“Let’s leave them to say goodbye, James.” His mother told him. Like he was a child who just wanted to stay with his friend a little longer. 

He wasn’t happy about it but he agreed to go. 

They would see each other soon. 

He turned away to start walking when he heard his mother say something quietly to regulus. He didn’t make anything out but decided not to inquire about it. 

He just wanted to get on this bloody train. 

He needed a hug from his favorite person. 

Seeing him and not being able to hold him close the way he wants was not good for James’ emotional state. 

Of course Padfoot and Moony decided to reappear right before his mother left. 

But she did pull him aside one more time before he boarded. 

“James.” She started. Looking unsure. “I want you to listen to what I’m about to tell you.” 

James was always listening. But now he was really paying attention. Letting his friends go and find a carriage for them. 

His mother sighs, and placed her hands on his shoulders. 

“Your capacity for love is limitless. It knows no bounds. I know you love your friends. And they love you too. As they should. But don’t forget that you deserve the happiness that they’ve already found in each other. You don’t have to keep giving and giving of yourself expecting nothing in return.” Tears gathered in her eyes. James felt helpless. He didn’t know what to do. 

“Mum. Please don’t cry.” He whispered. 

“No. I’m okay, love. I promise. I just want you to be happy. And I raised you to be selfless which I’m so proud of. But maybe a bit too selfless.” She sniffled then looked at him seriously. “Just don’t be afraid to let people love you. Even the most unexpected of people.” She winked. 

“Okay. Off you go, young man. Don’t keep them waiting.” 

“I love you, mum.” He said sincerely. He watched her nod then dashed to meet his friends. 

Regulus had found peace in an empty compartment. 

That peace was short lived. 

“How was your summer, Reggie?” 

Regulus winced at the awful nickname his roommate had given his 2nd year. 

“The same. And yours?” He didn’t care. He was not interested. But he was also polite. 

Damn all the niceties. He just wanted to sit by himself until he could get into the castle and away from the noise. Into the arms of his golden boy. 

But no. 

Of course not. 

Couldn’t let Regulus have a little bit of silence. 

“It was alright. Lot of family functions and that.” Evan replied throwing himself into the seat across from Regulus. 

He only nodded back at him. 

Then there was a noise. 

A very specific noise. 

That sent Regulus up out of his seat before he could check to see if it actually was. 

Tap tap tap. 

Against the glass.

He slammed the door open and grabbed the paper bird before anyone else could see. Aside from Evan of course who decided it wasn’t worth the effort to ask. 

“I’ll be back later.” Was what Regulus threw over his shoulder before exiting the carriage and walking to the back of the train for privacy. 

He took a deep breath then read the note. 

God he loved the feeling of not knowing what to expect. 

Baby Black, 

Quite a meeting outside, eh? Looks like our families are already friends. More of an excuse for us to be. 

I can’t wait to get off this train. 

I want to hear about your summer. 

And how you’ve been. 

Screw the feast.

Last one to the room of requirement has to sneak to the kitchens and get food. 

Think you can beat me? 

Golden Boy 

Regulus wanted to steal him away from his friends now. 

But he knew he couldn’t. 

So he settled for a reply. 

Golden Boy, 

You haven’t got a chance. 

But it’ll be fun to watch you try. 

I’ll see you then. 

R.A.B. 

Ps. Your mother is a very intimidating woman. 

Regulus didn’t think he’d ever run faster in his life. Once the self drawn carriages (which were actually pulled by thestrals) finally stopped in front of the castle, Regulus took off through the crowd of students who were squeezing into the great hall for the feast. 

He snuck past Professor McGonagall’s watchful eye with the help of some rowdy first years. 

Regulus never broke the rules. 

But the moment had his heart racing. 

He loved the thrill of almost getting caught. It was addicting. 

He made it to the stairs with no interruptions and silently thanked the Universe for it. 

His pace didn’t slow. 

Two at a time on the stairs all the way up to the 5th floor hallway. 

He stood at the door for a moment before it transformed before him. 

Thank you. He said wordlessly to the castle. 

Before he entered, he tuned into his intuition. 

He was the first to arrive. 

Ha! James would be sneaking to the kitchens after all. 

James almost didn’t make it. 

Sirius caught him arm as he tried to sneak off. 

“Prongs, where are you going?” 

“Just gonna set up some little entertainments for us later. Nothing too big. I’ll meet you in the room later.” He lied and then he shot Sirius that dazzling smile and proceeded to sneak away before he could respond. 

When he was far enough back to not be seen by anyone, he pulled his cloak out of his back pocket. 

Fleamont taught him that shrinking spell for easy travel. Smart old man. 

James got it back to full size and threw it over his head. 

Disappearing into the castle behind McGonagall. 

James took a deep breath before he finally pushed open the door. 

That was the last moment he felt any worry. 

The door swung open and revealed his favorite room in the whole castle. 

Their room. 

He and Regulus spent hours upon hours there. 

The boy in question was lying on the couch reading.

Which had been interrupted by James. 

“Took you long enough.” Regulus teased. “I’ll have tea. And a biscuit. Wait. Make that two.”

James said nothing. He just kept walking across the room until he got to him. 

When he approached the couch, Regulus stood up. 

Meeting him halfway. 

James wrapped the younger boy in his arms. 

Having no intention of ever letting him go. 

It was too long this time. 

With Regulus close to him, all the tension in his body melted away. He sighed in relief. 

He felt that rushing feeling travel through him. Like a waterfall. Washing away all his panic and frustration and anguish. 

He turned his face into Regulus’ neck and whispered. “I missed you, baby Black.” 

Regulus shuddered. He could feel James’ warm breath against his skin. 

“I missed you.” 

They stayed like that for a long time. 

Regulus spoke again. “Thank you for writing me.” He whispered. “I was beginning to lose my mind.” 

“You weren’t alone. You were never alone. I thought of you the whole time. Always.” James was playing with the curls at the nape of Regulus’ neck. 

They were both still. And quiet. Trying to keep the fragile moment from shattering. 

Regulus’ mind kept repeating itself. 

Rejoice! The sun has come back. The cold is gone. Rejoice! 

“I’ve never felt more at peace than I am right now.” He admitted quietly. 

They were still holding each other. Afraid to let go. 

“I’ve needed one of your hugs since the day we left for break.” James figured if they were telling truths, then he could say this with no fear of judgment. 

“And? Is it living up to your expectations?” Regulus joked. 

“You are constantly exceeding my expectations.” James said. “But yes. I feel much better now.” 

They still hadn’t let go.

Regulus was warm. For the first time in a long time he felt warm with life inside him. 

James was holding him. Like his life depended on it. 

Like they were the only two on a sinking ship. 

Regulus would gladly drown with him. 

“Wait.” James said suddenly. Then he pulled back. But didn’t drop his hands from around Regulus’ neck. So the younger boy didn’t remove his hand from James either. Still needing to feel him. 

“Do you have it on?” 

James was very close. And regulus was extremely distracted. So for a moment, he had no idea what James was talking about. 

“What?” He asked, somewhat absent minded.

“Your birthday gift, Regulus.” James said exasperated. 

James hardly uses his first name. Regulus loved the way it sounded coming from his lips. His voice was smooth and low and it curled around Regulus like a warm blanket. 

“Oh! Of course.” He pulled back his right hand from James’ hips and allowed him to inspect it. “I told you, I’m not taking it off.” He smiled. “I love it.” 

James looked at him. “Even with…” he didn’t finish. He just acted like Regulus knew how he was going to finish that sentence. 

“Even with…? You are going to have to finish that one for me because I can’t actually read your mind.” 

Well not all the time. He thought. 

James seemed to get all the information he needed. 

“No nothing. It’s nothing. I’m gonna go to the kitchens and get you some biscuits. And something to actually fill your stomach.” He was fumbling his words and Regulus almost didn’t catch them. Then James was out the door and gone. 

Regulus never got a word in. 

That was strange. 

Was there something about the ring that James wasn’t satisfied with? 

What could possibly make James think there was anything he wasn’t going to like about it? 

Regulus slid the ring off his ringer and inspected the outside. 

Was there a casting scuff? Or a minuscule scratch he wasn’t aware of? 

Maybe the inside of it was uneven. Regulus hadn’t noticed. 

But he did notice something else. 

Oh. 

Oh. 

There were words inscribed on the inside of the little black band. 

You could hardly see if you weren’t really looking, but there it was. In neat cursive etching. 

Petite étoile

‘Little star’

Regulus wanted to cry. But he couldn’t. James would be coming back soon. 

This boy. 

He was going to drive Regulus all the way mad. 

He knew Regulus loved the stars. Not just because of his namesake but because gazing up at the night sky and finding millions of those brilliant little lights is something that still takes his breath away. Stubborn in their wanting to show off. Refusing to let their light go out. 

The star itself is most likely long gone. 

But the light. 

The light still finds us. 

Regulus always needed light. With how dark his life tends to get. 

The second fact, that would’ve been overlooked by most, is that it’s in French. 

Both Regulus and Sirius were taught to speak it fluently as children. 

James knew that. James knew Regulus would understand. 

The door opened again. James appearing behind it, carrying a tray. 

“They didn’t have biscuits ready. But I did get apple pastries. I know they’re you’re favorite. I asked them to go ahead and make some fresh biscuits though, you can have tea without biscuits and-“ he stopped speaking and was looking at Regulus. “What’s wrong?“

Regulus was just watching him in awe. 

What was this feeling? 

It made him feel like he was going to levitate off the floor. 

In the silence, James sat down the tray and walked over to him. 

“What happened, I was gone for 5 minutes. Why do you look upset?”

Regulus couldn’t stop himself from taking him in his arms again. 

He needed James as close to him as he could get. He didn’t know why. He didn’t care. He just knew it felt like heaven. Like a drug he couldn’t get enough of. James got him high on life, just by being there with him. 

“I’m not. I promise. I’m not upset.”  He said into James’ neck. He purposefully let him lips brush the skin there. 

Feeling James respond and watching chills dance across. 

James held him. His hands pressed into the small of Regulus’ back. 

Then he was pulling back. And shaking his head slightly. 

“What is it?” Regulus asked. Pulling at him with his eyes. 

“Nothing. I just need to tell you…I need to tell you that you’re important to me. And that being with you is starting to change who I am. The way I see things.” He stopped. And completely let go of Regulus. Not moving back. Just letting go. “I should tell you, I’m a very…protective person.” He was not meeting Regulus’ eye and the younger boy was having a hard time figuring out what he was trying to say. 

“You don’t say. I never would’ve guessed that about you.” He said sarcastically. 

“Not just protective but possessive. I’m a very needy person. It might make me childish, but so be it.” James shrugged. Sure of himself. “This is your opportunity to back out. If you don’t want…a commitment. A friendship. It can’t be reduced to Christmas breaks and letters knocking on my door. I need to see you.” Regulus had never seen James like this before. He was pleading. And sad. Why did he look so sad? 

Regulus’ response was quiet. He never made declarations loudly. 

“Why would I ever say no to that? Despite what I tell you very often, I find your company comforting in more ways that I can convey to you.” He was still looking at James. Begging him to look back. He didn’t want him to be sad. He wanted him to know that he was right here. 

“I don’t know why i feel the need to be with you at every waking moment. It’s not something I do consciously, believe me.” They both laughed at that. “James Potter, whether you like it or not, our fates are woven together and you can’t get rid of me.” Regulus took James hands in his own and he shrugged small. 

James smiled then. The kind of smile that took out the shred of self control Regulus still managed to maintain. 

“Good. Then it’s settled.” James said finally. “Ill have to come up with something to tell the boys.” He said looking away. 

Oh here we go. Regulus thought. 

The scheming begins. 

But watching James get that look on his face when he was thinking was worth everything. 

What was this feeling? 

An hour later, 

They were lounging in front of the window talking about summer. Regulus was enjoying the feeling of the older boy’s attention when something in James’ pocket started shaking and vibrating. 

This again. 

James jumped up. Trying to find a decent place to look busy. 

He ran over to a patch of empty wall and started digging around in his pocket for the vibrating mirror. 

Finally, James took a deep break then opened the mirror. 

“Padfoot! How was the feast?” He was trying to sound lighthearted. 

“It was great, which you would’ve known if you hadn’t ditched us as soon as we got here. What are you doing?“ Sirius asked. 

“I told you already. But Filch caught me now I’m stuck cleaning trophies with the only other person who managed to get detention on the first day.” James smiled looking up at Regulus. 

He felt special. And fond at the fact that James included him in any way. James could make anyone feel like they had something special. 

“Oh yeah? Who’s that?” Sirius asked curious as ever. 

“You wouldn’t know him.” James once again looked right past the mirror to see Regulus. Standing there. Watching him. 

“Just a little garden snake that got into some trouble.” 

“Give them my condolences for having to put up with you. How long do you have to stay, Prongs?” 

James shrugged. “I’m not sure. But I’ll check back in later, okay? I’ve got to go, the old dodger could be back any minute.” 

“Okay. See you in the room.” Sirius replied. 

“See you.” James said. Then closed the mirror and letting out a huge sigh of relief. 

“I did not think that was gonna go well.” 

“James, if you’re needed, you can go. You don’t owe me any more of your time.” Regulus said small and quiet. Secretly hoping James would choose to stay. 

“I’m not leaving because I don’t want to go.” James said taking steps towards Regulus. Stopping when he landed directly in front of the smaller boy. 

Regulus had to look up slightly to meet James’ eye. 

“Do you want me to leave, Regulus?” James asked low and quiet. Only for him. 

Regulus didn’t trust himself with words, he just slowly shook his head. And looked down at the floor. 

James’ gaze was too intense. Made him feel too many things. 

“Good. Because even if you did, I’m not going anywhere.” He smiled that dazzling smile. “Now, you heard all about my summer. I want to hear about yours.” 

James pulled Regulus’ hand until he followed him to the couch. And they sat together. 

“I told you. Not much to tell. I can’t regale you the tales of my adventures or anything.” He was staring at nothing. Thinking back to the summer endless. 

“I didn’t really go outside. It was too…it reminded me too much of things that made me happy. That I couldn’t get to. So I stayed inside. Reading. And distracting myself.” 

His eyes wandered over to James as they always did. 

“I missed you a lot.” He whispered. “The loneliness than had always been there increased tenfold.” 

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there.” James whispered. 

“No. It’s not your fault.” Regulus said shaking his head. Reassuring James that there was nothing he could’ve done. “And you helped me more than you can imagine. Your note on my birthday brought me out of an endless darkness.” He smiled remembering the moment he knew James had thought of him. And reminded him that he was not alone. 

“I didn’t want you to be alone on your birthday.” James said, unknowingly repeating Regulus’ own thoughts. 

“And I wasn’t.” Regulus said thoughtfully. He couldn’t keep the softness out of his voice 

“There was this moment…” James said looking at Regulus like he wanted him to explain something to him. “I was alone. And sad. And it was the middle of the night…” James trailed off. Looking away like maybe he’d dreamt it. 

Regulus knew immediately what he was referring to. But he waited to hear what his golden boy had to say. He wanted to hear it from his perspective. 

“I found myself outside somehow. Well after midnight. And I just sat and stared up at the stars.” He said looking up as if he would find them again. 

“And i thought of you. I looked at the stars and couldn’t think of anything but how much I missed you.” He paused again. “Then something strange happened. I thought I might’ve just been tired. Or hallucinating. 

But-“ 

Regulus couldn’t let him think these things any longer so he cut James off. 

“You weren’t hallucinating.” Regulus said not looking James in the eyes. 

“You mean I actually heard you.” James looked shocked. 

“Yes you did. I don’t know how. Or why. But I was there that night.” He whispered. 

“It was almost like a thought in my head but it was in your voice.” James said incredulously. 

“I was dreaming.” Regulus said. “I thought it was just any other dream. I was standing in front of a house I’d never seen before. And for a moment I thought it had nothing to do with me. That I was just watching the events of someone else’s life.” He looked towards the window behind James and decided he couldn’t tell him his experience while being so close. 

When he got to the window, he felt he could speak freely without the warmth of James gaze. But it followed him. Everywhere he went in the room, it followed him. It was driving him crazy. In the best way. 

“Then you appeared. Stumbling out of the house. You looked exhausted. I remember thinking that.” He smiled small. “First I thought it was a cruel trick that my mind was playing on me. Being able to see you but not speak. Or feel. I couldn’t move. I could only observe. But this is also what let me know that this might actually be happening. Dreams are not allowed to alter the state of reality.” 

James looked like he’d just seen a ghost. 

“You were there? You saw me?” He asked with a pleading look in his eye. 

“I did. You were beautiful.” Regulus said before he could stop it tumbling out of his mouth. “I’ve never seen you in the summer. It was like a completely different person. But still the same. Still the golden boy.” He was almost speaking to himself. But James was listening. Always listening. Always paying attention. 

“Wait. But if you couldn’t speak. Then how did I…”

“That’s the strange part.” Regulus said. 

“I couldn’t. I couldn’t move. But then it was like they cracked open the door just long enough for me to get a thought across. And that was the thought I wanted to tell you the most, I guess. It just came out. I thought you wouldn’t even be able to hear it.” He smiled. “But you answered. And then I woke up and thought I was losing my mind.” 

“If I had known you could see me I might’ve dressed a little more appropriately.” James laughed. Remembering the night. 

“I’m glad you didn’t.” Regulus said offhand and quiet. He didn’t look at James. But he could feel his eyes on him. He kept his gaze aimed out the huge window overlooking black lake. 

When he heard James get up from the couch, he finally looked over. The older boy was making his way to the window to sit next to Regulus. 

Before he sat, he asked “Do you dream of me often?” No joking tone. No sarcasm laced in the words. 

“I have before.” Regulus confirmed immediately. “But never like that. That one was surreal. I could see the stars and feel the grass under my feet. The ones before were more…I don’t know. Dreamlike. Very floaty and vibrant.” He smiled small again. “And unrealistic.” 

James was smiling too. “Unrealistic? How so?“ 

“Well. They’re rarely in places I’ve seen before. Which is odd in and of itself because I can see details of the place so clearly in my mind but I know I’ve never been there.” He said looking at the floor. “And I can see myself in the dreams too. So I’m like a 3rd person perspective looking at versions of me and you speaking. And we’re always…” together he almost said. But he was not going to admit to the folly’s of his own mind. 

“We’re always what?” James inquired gently. 

“I don’t know.” Regulus shook his head. “But there are a few I’ve experienced where we’re here. In this room. In my room, over Christmas. Those are more like memories.” He said. “Kind of.” 

“I’d give anything to know what the inside of your mind looks like.” James said looking at him intently. 

“It’s a mess, I can assure you.” Regulus laughed. 

The next day they met after dinner while Sirius was preoccupied with ogling Remus while he was studying in the library. 

Regulus laughs thinking about his brother pretending to study, just to be completely obvious. While Remus remains as oblivious as always, reading. 

That’s what he was thinking while he waited. 

“Did you hear?“ James said as he opened the door to find Regulus in his usual spot on the couch. 

Regulus was already nodding his head. Knowing what James was referring to. He didn’t know how he kept doing that. 

“Yes I heard all about it. Looks like we missed a show at the feast.” 

After leaving the room yesterday all he heard in the halls were talk of dancing girls and marching men. 

“Peter said the Beauxbatons girls were the prettiest he’s ever seen.” James laughed at that. 

Regulus rolled his eyes not looking away from his book but not reading it either. 

“Yeah well their pretty faces aren’t going to help them in that tournament.” He tried not to sound bitter. He failed. He pretended to turn a page. 

“Regulus Arcturus Black.” James said smirking at him. 

Why did he have to use his full name like that? 

“Do I sense a hint of jealously?” 

“I don’t know what you sense but I can assure you I’m not jealous of a bunch of princesses who are just flouncing around trying to get the attention of every handsome Durmstrang idiot that passes by them in the halls.” He huffed out. 

Okay. So Maybe he was a little bitter about it. So what.

James’ smile fell from his lips. “You think they’re handsome?” 

“You missed the idiot bit, Potter. I don’t associate with mindless cretins.” He finally looked up from his book and found James looking like a kicked puppy. 

“What? What did I do?” Regulus wanted to take back whatever he’d said to put that look on his face. 

“You called me ‘Potter’. I hate when you do that.” He whispered. 

Oh. Regulus hadn’t even caught it. 

“I’m sorry. Old habits die hard.” He smiled small. Trying to send the older boy all the reassurance he had. 

“James.” Regulus put all his intense feelings and gentle concern for that beautiful in his voice. “I’ll call you anything you want, as long as you never have that look on your face again.” 

A smile broke out. Regulus was staring into the sun once again. 

“Really? Anything?” James said, teasing. 

“Now I regret ever opening my mouth.” Regulus tried very hard not to think of the innuendo that he’s replied with. It didn’t work. The mental images flooded into his minds eye. 

James on the couch. Shirtless. Not being able to stand the heat. James on the bed. Sprawled out, taking up as much space as he possibly can. White sheets offsetting the soft, sun kissed skin of his bare shoulders. 

“Where did you go?“ the low voice pulled Regulus back from his thoughts. 

Thank God. 

“What? Nowhere. I’m here.” He said quickly recovering. 

“So?” He said asking his silent question. 

“So…?” James obviously didn’t follow his train of thought. 

“Are you going to put your name in the cup?” Regulus asked quietly. 

This was his greatest fear in life. 

To send something (or someone) he cherishes more than life itself into an unknown and dangerous situation. 

“Do you think I should?“ James whispered back. He trusted Regulus’ opinion above any one else’s. 

“That’s not the right question, James.” Regulus shook his head. “Do I think you’d win, if you did enter? Definitely. Do I want you to?” He paused. “No. It scares me. I wouldn’t be able to get to you if you needed help.” He looked at James pleading with him to understand. 

“But it’s your decision, Golden Boy. I won’t hold you back.” 

James said nothing for a whole 30 seconds. 

Then he shook his head. “I’m not gonna do it. I have too much to lose. I have too many people to take care of.” He didn’t look disappointed. He just seemed to accept his situation. 

“And I would miss you too much.” 

“I’ll always be here. Waiting for you.” Regulus wanted to tell him that he’d never not be waiting on him. Every time he leaves, a piece of Regulus goes with him. 

“Sure you won’t get tired of me?” The insecure little voice in James’ head was yelling at him. 

“James Potter, look at me.” Regulus insisted. James obeyed. “I will never get tired of you. Im always tired. Of life. Of family. Of obligations. But never of you. Never think that.” 

An hour later, James brought it up again. 

“You know, with the tournament happening here, it means Hogwarts will host the Yule Ball.” He was only in his dress shirt and trousers now. Robes and uniform long discarded by the door. He was sitting on the floor. Eating candy. While Regulus was laying in what he considered to be his spot. Looking down at the boy leaning by his legs. 

“My dad told me about it a long time ago. They had the tournament here when he was in school, too.” 

Regulus scoffed considering the idea. 

Aball. Nothing more than a chance to dress up and play hooky. 

He considered something else. 

“What’s your dad like?” He asked. 

“Fleamont? Umm.” James had to think about how to describe his father. “He’s very clever. Real bookish type. Not unlike yourself.” James threw a smile over his shoulder. “You are actually quite similar. He’s a quiet graceful man. But his anger is ground quaking.” He thought back to the handful of times his father had ever actually been angry at him. Usually when he put himself in unsafe situations. He more often saw his fathers anger pointed towards people from work that he fundamentally disagreed with. 

“So would you say you’re more like your mother?” Regulus asked eying him curiously with his head propped on his arm like a pillow.

“I’d say that’s a fair statement to make. We’re very optimistic. We like to find the silver lining.” He paused looking at the younger boy. “I was wondering when you were gonna bring her up after your official meeting.” He laughed at the memory. Regulus smiled at that. “So what did you think?” 

“I think I agree with you. You’re very similar. I see the pieces of her in you. She’s strong. And upfront. Not a deceitful bone in her body.” Regulus thought there was no one in the world like James until he met his mother. 

“She scares me the same way you do. Or did. Or do. I don’t know.” He shook his head. 

“I scare you? Since when?” James sounded surprised. 

“Since forever. I told you. You’re the golden boy. Perfect. Before I knew you I was scared of your judgement. Your observant eye. But now I’m scared in a different way.” A pause. “I’m afraid I’ll disappoint you. More than I’ve ever been afraid to disappoint someone.” 

“Don’t be scared of me. Maybe this isn’t what you want to hear, but even if in some universe, you ended up disappointing me, it would never push me to leave you. Because I know you. And I know that your emotions can cloud your own judgement sometimes. But I’ll always be here. To clear away the rain.” 

Regulus wanted to cry. And he wanted to scream his joy to the world. This feeling that seems to keep him floating above it. This feeling lifts his heavy soul to levitate inside his body. 

“That’s exactly what I wanted to hear.” Regulus said quietly. 

“Good. I’m quite good at that, you know.” 

“Yes. I know. And it’s annoying.” Regulus loved teasing him. He could do it forever. 

“Oh please. You’ve already admitted to me once today that you enjoy my company, don’t make me pretend to be sad to get you to say it again.” James feigned disinterested and waved his hand in Regulus’ direction. 

“Let’s change the subject, shall we?” Regulus answered in the same tone. But trying to hide his smile. 

“As you wish.” James looked at him. With that unknowable look. Regulus could never peg that one down. “So this ball. People are taking…dates.” He said with finality. Looking away into the fireplace to distract his eyes. 

“Yes? And?” Regulus asked, curious as to what James was after. 

“Well. Everyone is expected to turn up…with a date.”  He was chewing on the inside of his lip like it pained him to talk about it. “Will you be asking anyone to the festivities, baby Black?” 

He tried with all his might to control his tone of voice. To give off a very casual air. It did not work. But Regulus was too distracted with the question. How was he supposed to answer this? 

No actually. I’m completely emotionally unavailable because I’m obsessed with a boy that has the whole world at his feet. 

“Well.” He thought for a moment. “If everyone is expected to bring a date, I’ll either find one or I won’t go.” He paused again. Not knowing if he should go on. He was pointedly not looking at James and instead gazing up at the high ceiling. “And even if I do ask someone, it wouldn’t mean anything. I wouldn’t be able to ask anyone that I actually like.” 

Sigh. Why did he have the be the one tasked with managing all these specific feelings swirling around inside him. All mixed up with all the other feelings but somehow overpowering them. Regulus realized a while ago that the feelings associated with James came a lot stronger and faster than any other emotions he’s ever felt. 

He didn’t know why. But he doubted he ever would. 

“Why not?” The older boys voice woke him from his thoughts. 

“What?“

“Why wouldn’t you be able to ask someone you actually liked?” James was looking at him. With those eyes. Eyes like the sun. Like the forrest in the summer. 

Regulus didn’t know what he was going to say. He was silent for a few beats. 

“Well because the people I like, don’t feel the same. And I’m not going to embarrass myself.” He shrugged. 

“They must be mad. If they don’t feel the same way then they don’t deserve you. That’s all there is to it.” James whispered. 

“That’s not true.” 

“It is.” James raised his voice in their quiet space. “If they don’t see everything special about you then they don’t deserve your time. Or your effort. Or your feelings.” He was angry. Why was he so angry? 

“They’re better than me, James. They have a good heart.” 

James couldn’t tell him that what Regulus just told him broke his heart a little. He wouldn’t understand why. James himself hardly understood why. 

But he shook his head to rid himself of those thoughts. 

“No. No one has a better heart than you.” 

“Why are you so angry?” Regulus asked quietly. 

“I don’t know!” James threw his hands to his hair and starting pulling. 

“James.” Regulus was in the floor with him in a second. “Hey. Please don’t do that.” He was trying to pull James hands away. “You’re going to hurt yourself.” He was whispering and pleading. Because Regulus did not beg loudly. 

James heard it. He heard what Regulus was trying to tell him. He dropped his hands into his lap. 

“I’m sorry.” He whispered. “I don’t know.” That was the only answer to all the questions floating around in his brain bumping into each other. 

The next thing he said, he said so quietly that if Regulus hadn’t been right next to him he wouldn’t have heard it. 

“You shouldn’t go to the ball with someone you don’t like. But if you decide not to go at all, I’ll skip it with you.” He smiled so small and sad. 

“You are the Golden Boy of Gryffindor House. I cannot deny your admirers their time with you.” Regulus didn’t care how many times James had to go away, he only cared that he always came back. When the party was over, and all the people were gone, he came back to Regulus. 

“I would much rather stay here with you, baby Black.” There was no sarcasm there. 

“What about you, then?” Regulus asked. “Will you be taking the fairest of them all?” 

“I doubt I find anyone that can put up with me for a whole evening.” That dazzling smile has returned to its rightful place and Regulus was proud of himself. 

“What about the girl?” Regulus had forgotten all about her until last term. When he saw them together. Not doing anything. Just talking and laughing. She was rolling her eyes at him the way Regulus always did when he was being ridiculous. 

“What girl?” James asked. Genuinely lost. 

“Evans.” He could barely get the name out. 

“Oh.” James looked surprised. “I used to have a thing for her.” He paused. “But it was more that I wanted her approval.” Regulus could tell he was sorting through his memories. “But in 3rd year I realized she could give me her approval without me having to take every thing else. I didn’t really want to be with her. And as far as now, she’s head over heels in love with someone else. And I’m genuinely happy for her.” He looked over at Regulus. “So if we did go together, it would be as friends.”

“If she’s with someone else, why wouldn’t she go with them?” 

“Well. She can’t. Or she thinks she can’t.” 

“But why?” Why wouldn’t a girl like Lily Evans be able to go to the ball with whoever she wanted? Why would she have to take James as a friend if-

Oh. 

“Oh.” He said out loud. Then he nodded. “I understand.” 

James’ head whipped in his direction. 

“Do you?” 

“I do.” Everything in Regulus’ mind has quieted. “The same reason I wouldn’t be able to go with anyone I like.” 

He had just admitted something monumental. Something no one else knew about him, aside from Cissy. 

He was torn between hoping that James wouldn’t understand his explanation and praying to every god there was that he did understand. 

And he hoped he wouldn’t run away when he realized. 

What would he do if James ran away from him now? He would never recover. He couldn’t go back to life the way it was before. Hopeless. Joyless. Bleak. 

His breaths started coming harder. 

Oh God. 

He hadn’t had a panic attack since after last Christmas. 

And this one was bad. He could feel the pressure building in his chest. 

“Regulus.” A voice. But not just any voice. His voice. The voice of heaven. 

“Regulus, take a deep breath. Breathe with me.” 

James had a hand on his back. Regulus could feel the heat spread from that location to his whole body. And with it, so did calm. 

How did he manage to do that every time? 

Why couldn’t Regulus stop needing him? 

“Regulus. Everything is fine.” James was in his space. Regulus could smell him in the proximity. 

Oak. Earth. Summertime. 

Another wave of calm came. 

“I’m not going anywhere.” He was whispering right in his ear. 

Regulus finally grabbed the reins in his mind and forced his body to turn towards James. 

“You’re not going to run away?” He whispered. 

“Of course not.” As if it was ridiculous for Regulus to assume he would. “I know your instincts, Regulus. Remember when we talked about your brother and Remus?” 

Regulus did remember. That day in the Great Hall, back when they could have a meal together. “Even if they weren’t my best friends, I would never judge someone based on who they love.” James sighed. “And on top of that, it would be a bit hypocritical of me to have a problem with it.” 

“What do you mean?” 

James chuckled and shook his head. “You’re only bright when you want to be, baby Black.” He sighed again. “I like everyone. Boys. Girls. It doesn’t really matter to me. I like who I like.” He shrugged. 

Regulus was speechless. James had just come out and said what he had been shoving away his entire life. 

Regulus knew what bisexuals were. He wasn’t living under a rock. But he didn’t know that a person could like someone else without gender having anything to do with it. 

He had never considered this an option. And it made sense. 

James was too big, too bright to be limited by the organs in which a person does or does not have. 

Regulus smiled. Of course. He and James had found each other for a reason. Maybe many reasons. And this was one of them. James always had something new for Regulus to know. Even when he thinks he’s dug to the very bottom of James Potter’s well of knowledge, he finds a trap door. And the well always goes deeper. 

“You always manage to surprise me.” Was all he could say. “Thank you for telling me.” 

“Thank you for trusting me.” He leaned his head towards him. “I’m honored. I feel like I get the real you. Not the you everyone else sees.” 

“You do. You’re the only one. No one else has ever bothered to take the time.” 

“Their mistake. They missed a shooting star while they were distracted.” James said quietly. 

“Do you realize how late it is, Mr. Golden Boy?Your friends are going to get suspicious soon, if they aren’t already.” 

“Oh they are. Marauders are always suspicious. It’s in our nature.” He straightened his back and smiled. 

“You’re a very prideful lion, did you know?” Regulus asked rhetorically. Absolutely no malice in his voice. 

“And you are an antelope disguised as a garden snake.” He smirked with a very cheeky tilt of his head. 

“Wouldn’t that make me your prey?” Regulus teased. 

“Of course not. But as for your little antelope friends, I can’t say the same.” 

Regulus had a thought then. He decided to voice it. 

“I’d like to request something from you.” He smiled. 

“Anything, baby Black. Just ask.” 

“I’d like to see you, in your other form. As Prongs, I mean.” He hoped this wasn’t crossing any boundaries. “Not on a full moon, of course. Just whenever the occasion presents itself, maybe.” 

“I’d love to show you.” James had a face splitting smile and a twinkle in his eye. 

“What? What’s with the look?” 

“You’ve just never used the name Prongs before.” He said smiling, proudly. 

“That’s because it’s not your name.” He said rolling his eyes playfully. “It’s the stag’s name.” 

“It’s both of our names. We’re the same person.” 

“No. That is completely incorrect.” 

“I think I would know. I’m the one transforming into the blasted thing.” 

“You’re telling me you think exactly the same way as Prongs as you would if you were a human?” James said nothing. “That’s what I thought.“

“You just can’t help but be right all the time, can you?“

“It’s a blessing and a curse.” 

They were able to avoid their respective groups clashing for a few weeks into the fall. But it wasn’t for long. 

Regulus was walking with the other three. Barty, Evan, and Mulciber. They were talking about an assignment they’d just been given. 

But Regulus quickly dropped out of the conversation when he saw James and the other three walking in their direction.  

He quickly sent up a prayer that this went without incident. 

James saw him and smiled quietly. Private. No one else could see it. 

“Watch where you’re going, Potter.” 

Oh no. 

James was distracted and walked directly into Mulciber. 

“I’m sorry.” He apologized and tried to keep going. Regulus knew it was because he saw the ruckus it could cause. 

But no such luck was bestowed upon them. 

“That’s not good enough.” Mulciber said without turning around. 

Sirius stepped in. Regulus knew he would. 

“Listen, barfbreath, he said he was sorry. It was an accident. Just let it go, for once in your life.” They tried to leave again. 

Regulus saw Mulciber raise his wand. 

No. 

No. 

Regulus wasn’t allowing this to happen. 

Before the angry boy could move to strike, Regulus grabbed him by the arm in a death grip. 

“Don’t.” He spit through gritted teeth. “We will all be punished for your stupidity. Keep. Walking.” 

Mulciber didn’t say anything in response, because he knew he couldn’t. Regulus was the Heir. No one on this side could question his judgement. Not the ones enrolled at Hogwarts anyway. And if he was going to use that power for any reason, this was it. 

The other three kept walking and Regulus just stood there breathing with his eyes closed, trying to calm down. 

He heard students passing him, as though he were a pebble on the ocean floor, water rushing all around him, yet he is unmoving. 

He finally opened his eyes to begin to piece his sanity back together and move on. 

When he did, he saw the hundreds of bodies rushing to get to lessons before they were late. 

And he saw James. 

Just standing there, completely still. Staring at him. 

Another pebble in the ocean floor. 

They stared at each other until all the students disappeared. 

When the last one finally closed the last door, Regulus ran to him. 

And James caught him. 

He was always catching him. 

“I’m so sorry.” Regulus whispered, clutching the other boy’s body into his chest. 

“No, I’m an idiot.” He states. “I should’ve been paying attention to where I was going. I got…distracted.” 

Regulus’ heart did a backflip. 

That was new. 

All these symptoms he’s learning to deal with, for the sake of James Potter. 

“Just watch where you’re going next time, so they don’t kill you.” Regulus suggests, when he finally detaches his soul from James. 

“Fine.” James rolls his eyes playfully. “I’ll see you later, yeah?”

“Of course.” Regulus takes him in with his eyes one last time before sending him away again. “You need to go. McGonagall is more than willing to give you another detention.” 

“How did you know I had Transfigurations next?” 

“Because I just know these things. I don’t know.” Regulus shakes his head. “But I really don’t want you to get detention, so stop being late!” Regulus begins to push James down the corridor towards the classroom, the older boy laughing and digging in his heals. 

“Aw would you miss me, baby Black? You know it’s always your fault when I’m late.” James pokes at him. 

“It absolutely is not and I will not have you blaming it on me.” Regulus was still guiding him down the hallway but James was gaining strength enough to slow them down. 

Eventually Regulus would give up, if James protested hard enough he would skip class with him again, just to sit in the room and do nothing. His self-discipline was hanging on by a very thin thread. 

“Stop. Resisting.” 

“Stop. Pushing!” James is shouting and laughing and it’s making Regulus laugh. 

“I am getting you to McGonagall, if it-“

“Mr. Potter!” 

Speak of the devil and she shall appear. 

She looked frustrated but there was a hint of amusement in her eyes. 

“If you two are finished, there is a lesson happening here.” 

Regulus was suddenly aware that her door was open and she was yelling at James while Sirius, Remus and Peter were sitting there wondering why James is in the hallway causing trouble without them. They were wondering who he was with, if not them. 

Regulus was praying that McGonagall had the common sense God gave a goose to not scream his own name across the corridor. 

James scurried into the classroom but not before turning back and shooting a dazzling wink at Regulus. 

“You too.” McGonagall said to him. “Don’t be late.” Then she winked. And closed the door behind her. 

What is going on with the faculty at this school? 

James stumbled into the classroom laughing to himself until he set eyes on his fellow marauders. 

All with different arrays of emotions crossing their faces. 

Remus and Peter were mostly confused. But Sirius looked irritated. James was going to have to come up with something. 

“Sorry, lads. I got held up.” James tries to brush it off quickly. 

“We’re talking about this later, James.” Sirius had that look in his eye, he means business. 

James spent the entire lesson trying to come up with something to tell him. 

What if he just…told him the truth? Not the whole truth but just a little slice of it. Might make the withholding of the whole truth a little easier to swallow. 

He avoided the others’ eyes the entire time. He sat and bounced his knee in anticipation of just getting out. 

They made it back to the tower wordlessly, for the first time in a long time. 

When the door closed behind the last of them, Sirius let it fly. 

“Okay, Potter. I want to know what’s going on, and I want to know right this second. You’re gone all the time, you don’t tell us anything, and now you’re late to lessons because of…? What? What is it? Tell me.” Though James was braced for it, he still crumbled under his best friend’s scrutiny. He knows he’s been keeping things from him, and he hates it. 

“Okay.” James sits on his bed and leans on his knees. 

“Last Christmas break. I made…a friend. And we’ve been hanging out.” 

Silence. 

Remus looked surprised and Peter seemed to be calculating. 

“What do you mean you made a friend?” Sirius inquires as if James had just told him he grew a lobster out the side of his head. 

“I mean I made a friend.” 

“A friend who isn’t…us?” Peter questions aloud. 

“How could that be?” Sirius spits angrily. 

“What do you mean? I’m a perfectly sociable person, some people want to be my friend.” 

“Yeah…but..you don’t spend that much time with anyone except us. You never have.” And now Sirius has deflated into melancholy. 

“I know. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I just really like this person and they make me happy. They let me relax.” James tries to explain it in words, but it will never come out the way he means it. 

“This isn’t a romantic friend, is it?” Remus pipes up for the first time since they entered the room. He had an amusement in his small smile. 

“No.” James said, but he had to try again with more affirmation. “No. Definitely not.” 

“Why can’t you tell us who it is? Maybe they can be assimilated into the group.” Sirius asks. 

James is already shaking his head. 

“They aren’t like us, Padfoot. They like their privacy and my life here isn’t exactly as private as they’d prefer. I’m letting them lead with the timing of everything, but I wanted to tell you because I didn’t want you to think I was going dark side or something.” 

“We would never think that.” Remus assures him. “I’m glad you found someone that you can be quiet with.” Is all he says with a very heartfelt smile, before crossing the room and settling into his bed with a book. 

Peter seemed to be satisfied also, leaving to shower before supper. 

“Just…keep me updated, okay?” Sirius looks to him. “Let me know how it’s all unfolding.” 

“Of course, I will.” James pulls Sirius in for a hug. It’s been too long and his best friend needed to know that he was okay. 

“Thanks for looking out for me. I love you a lot.” 

“I love you too, buddy.” He pulls away and then says “But I think Moony might have you beat for favorite these days.” With a wink. 

“I’m all too aware.” James quips. 

“I heard my name over there. I don’t know what you two are gossiping about but I want no part in it.” Remus never looked up from his book. 

James and Sirius collapse into a fit of giggles. 

The Great Hall is crowded. Since the two other schools have been staying at Hogwarts, it’s always crowded. This made Regulus want to avoid it even more, but alas. He was forced to go by a few of his actual acquaintances that he was studying with. 

So here he is. In a sea of people. And he’s miserable. 

He doesn’t care about eating, he just wants to get to the table and sit down. 

Today has been a long day. He thinks. 

A second later, he feels it. It catches him so off guard that he almost falls into another student. 

The summer heat. 

Regulus swings his head back and forth, scanning the never ending crowd of people. 

Where is he? I know he’s here. He’s watching me.

Then he found him, shoved between his best friends, who at the moment looked to be arguing over James’ head. 

But James’ only focus was Regulus. He smiled at him sweetly, and Regulus only had the energy to give him a small one back and a tiny wave. 

Today really had been a very long day. 

Finally, Regulus makes it to the table and plops himself down in an exhausted heap. 

The buzz of constant noise in the hall was making his head begin to throb. Too many voices, too much energy. It’s overloading his mind. 

He has to lay his head down on the table. The coolness of the surface meeting his cheek takes a little of the over excitement out of his nervous system. 

He’s calm. And tired. 

He might just nap here. 

No sooner had he thought to rest, when something scares him out of his wits. 

Thankfully no one is paying him any attention. 

A paper bird had perched itself on his lap. The Great Hall is a risky place to send them, so he and James have tried to avoid it. 

With all these people, Regulus wonders how it wedged its way over to him. 

He opens it under the table. Never bringing it above his lap to read. 

You look so tired. 

Are you okay? 

Regulus could cry. 

He really could, right into the macaroni soup. 

Two sentences on a piece of paper almost bring him to sob because he is. He is tired. 

He’s tired of everything else. It’s so exhausting. Lessons and assignments and roommates and lies. 

And never any time with the one person Regulus actually wants to see. The one person that recharges him instead of draining him. 

Regulus wrote his response slowly. His vision is a little swimmy. 

Terrible day. 

I feel awful. 

And I miss you. 

He was starting to feel a bit drunk. Things were blurring a little. 

He had a hypothesis somewhere in his mind. 

He’s ill. It finally happened. His immune system did all it could but that endless summer really threw his body for a loop. 

He sent the bird before he couldn’t remember how. Then he got up and stumbled through people to find his way to the infirmary. Hoping to get there before he emptied his stomach on the talking portraits. 

Regulus didn’t know that the bird didn’t make it directly to James. 

Someone else retrieved it, by accident. 

Thankfully, that someone else was Remus Lupin. 

Their beloved Moony. Really the best of them. 

He had no idea why a paper bird was landing in his plate but he removed it and began to read. 

It didn’t take long for him to realize that it wasn’t intended for him. 

And that his friend, whether he knows it or not, has an admirer. 

Remus would recognize longing anywhere. 

He sees it in the mirror every day. 

Sirius was distracted by a Beauxbaton girl dancing in the middle of the hall when the bird arrived. 

James was reading and looking particularly glum. 

Remus kicked him, maybe a little too hard under the table. 

“Ow!” James looked up, a bit murderous, for a split second. 

“What’d yo-“

Remus pressed his index finger to his own lips, indicating that James needed to shut his mouth. 

Remus then tossed the folded paper into James’ lap, and smiled at him. 

James’ face turned to an expression that Remus is sure he’s never seen on him before. 

Something like glee but mixed with worry? Anxiety? And just for a second he saw it. 

The look. 

There it is. Remus thinks. That’s the look. 

These two poor souls have no idea. He chuckles into his pea soup. 

“What are you laughing at?” Sirius questions with an eyebrow raised. 

“None of your business, Padfoot. A man has a right to keep secrets.” Then he goes back to reading as if nothing happened. 

“I think I’ve been a bad influence on you, Moony.” Sirius tells him in disappointment. 

“I would have to agree with you.” Remus looks at him then. 

Sirius Black. 

Remus couldn’t tell you how he felt about Sirius Black if he had all the words in all the languages in the entire history of the world.  

It was something he just understood from the beginning. 

Magic is real. 

The sky is blue. 

Sometimes it rains. 

And Sirius Black is the closest thing to a god on Earth. 

Theatrical the same way Mother Nature is in sculpting her creations. 

Built like a statue in Athens. 

Ravenous, much like his counterpart. 

And quick. So quick sometimes your eyes don’t catch it. 

But Remus knows. 

It’s all an act. 

Sirius Black is a mystery inside a mystery and the version he sees sitting at the table is not the one that lives in his beautiful head. He is multitudes on multitudes and that is only one reason why Remus is completely, utterly, gone for him. Ensnared in every way a person can be. 

He’s been bewitched. 

And he resents it completely. 

Sirius is his best friend. Another piece of his soul. 

Being in love with him makes it rather difficult to keep the two separate in his mind that is infested with Sirius. 

He has to focus, or he won’t hear a word that comes out of Sirius’ mouth. 

“Are you going to the library later?” Sirius averts his gaze but Remus never looks away. 

Not really. Even if he’s reading, or working on an assignment, he’s always paying attention. 

“Feeling a bit peaky, actually. Thought I might just go back to the room.” He paused. “Would you like to join me?” 

Sirius shrugs, but he has a quiet smile that he’s trying to conceal by looking down. 

“Sure. I do actually need to do that reading for Herbology, I’m terrified of those…things.” 

“Padfoot, why did you take the class if you knew you didn’t like the plants?” Remus puts on a show with him because he enjoys it. Because it makes his day. 

“Because Moony! I couldn’t let you be alone with them! They could take a finger. Or other important bits that you may need later.” Remus really did love him. What a bright idea that was. “I’m there to protect you. So deal with it.” 

“Fine.” Remus huffs. “But, as my protector, I feel that you should be a bit more courageous with the offensive creature in question. Nevertheless I appreciate the sentiment.” Sirius had actually squealed when one of the Venomous Tentacula whipped a spiky vine in his direction. Remus almost breaks into a laugh thinking about it but be stifles it into a broad smile. 

“Remus, that plant had it out for me. It’s not at all funny and it’s going to come for me when I sleep. So I hope you’re happy with one less roommate.” The beautiful boy takes a drink of his pumpkin juice and pouts. 

“You are ridiculous. I would never allow it to take you in the night. That’s completely unfair.” 

Sirius laughs at him. 

“Thank you, Moony. You’re my hero, ya know that?” 

“So, you tell me.” 

Neither Remus or Sirius noticed James sneaking off while they were doing their dance. 

James was, once again, so incredibly thankful that his friends were in love with each other. 

When he finally made it out the double doors, he found his worst nightmare on the other side. 

The corridor was completely empty except for him. 

Regulus was on the ground. Slumped against the wall, eyes half lidded. 

James’ heart stopped cold. 

For a second, he thought Regulus wasn’t breathing. 

But then the younger boy moved his leg in a motion to lay down. 

Thank God. 

James rushed over to him. 

“No. Regulus, you can’t lay down. You have to get up.” James was quick on his feet. He had Regulus up supported with his own body weight in seconds. “We have to get you to the infirmary, baby Black.” 

“James?” Regulus wondered quietly. “What are you doing?” 

“I’m taking you to Madam Pomfrey.” 

“Someone could see you.” Regulus mumbled. 

“What on Earth are you talking about? I don’t care. You’re not well, so I’m taking you to the infirmary and that’s that.” 

They were almost there. He could see the doors down the end of a long hallway. 

James could tell Regulus was not in his right mind. It made James sad and worried. But he was coherent, which was a good sign. 

“Would you be embarrassed?” 

The question almost stopped James in his tracks, but he kept moving. 

“No. Not even a little bit.” He replied without hesitation. “I’m more embarrassing than you are, baby Black.” He huffs out in a self deprecating chuckle. 

James knew that Regulus would never say these things in his sober state state of mind. 

But almost nothing he could ever say would ever make James turn his back on him. 

James knew his heart. That’s all that matters, in the end. 

“Oh, stuff it, Potter. You’ve never embarrassed yourself in your life, have you?” Regulus giggles. 

“Plenty of times. More than I care to admit to you.” James is sure Regulus won’t remember any of this. 

They finally arrive at the infirmary. 

“Madam Pomfrey!” 

She seems to appear out of thin air, taking Regulus and guiding him to a bed. 

“What’s happened to him?” 

“I have no idea. He looked awful at supper then he left and when I followed him I found him in the corridor, half-passed out on the floor.” He tried to explain to her the best he could. 

“Thank you for bringing him, Mr. Potter. I will handle it from here.” She turns to take care of him, but notices James standing there with worry sewn into the lines of his face. 

“Come back tomorrow to check on him, Mr. Potter. It does him no good with you worrying on top of him.” She smiles sympathetically. 

James wasn’t sure if he’d ever seen her smile before. 

“Okay. Thank you.” He gets halfway out the door and turns back to say. “Please take care of him.” Before running away. 

He doesn’t go back to his room. Instead he heads for the 5th floor and stops in front of a creaky wooden door, hoping the castle will grant him time to be alone with his gnawing worry. 

As it had every time before, the door allows him access. 

James watches the stars out the window until he knows he has to go back. 

They’ll notice an empty bed after curfew. 

He wanders slowly back to Gryffindor tower, knowing he won’t sleep at all. And will most likely skip tomorrow, just to sit in the infirmary with Regulus. 

Regulus woke up alone. 

It was dark. And there was no noise. 

It took him longer than it normally would to realize where he was. 

The infirmary. 

From his bed, he could see a tiny specks of stars out one of the tall windows. 

It put a smile on his face, but not for long. 

He became very aware of the ache in his body. Everywhere. Everything hurt. 

He had no idea how long he’d been there. 

He assumed it was the middle of the night, and Pomfrey wasn’t going to let him go to lessons tomorrow, he was sure of it. 

Wait, how did he even get here? 

He remembers the great hall and James asking if-

Oh. 

James. 

Of course. 

Regulus hadn’t made it here by himself. He remembers feeling extremely tired. And then he remembers a very fuzzy conversation with James while being carried down the hallway.

Oh God. He rubs at his throbbing temples. I hope I didn’t say anything stupid. 

Half an hour later, Pomfrey appeared from behind a wall and scared Regulus out of his skin. 

“Calm down boy, I’m only here to give you another dose.” She moved quickly and with purpose. Handing him a small vial and glass of water. “Drink this.” 

“What time is it?” He mumbles after doing what he’s told. 

“The sun will be up in a few hours. You need rest, Mr. Black, try to sleep at least another hour or two.” 

“I’ll try but I can’t promise it’ll happen.” She gave him and look and turned to leave. “Thank you.” He said quietly. 

He didn’t get a response. Just the clacking of her aggressive steps that eventually disappeared out the door. 

Sleep. Yeah he could do with some sleep. 

But it was never that easy. If his mind says he’s awake, then he’s awake. It won’t stop just because he tells it to. 

Another hour passes and there’s no sleep, he has no books to read. He can only sit and stew in his own thoughts. All while his body feels like a plate of wet noodles. 

He’d just looked back up at the window when he heard the door open again. 

He couldn’t see who it was, he just assumed it was Pomfrey returning. 

“Is it time for another vial or are you just making sure I’m actually sleeping?” He questions rubbing the staleness out of his eyes. 

There was no answer. No clacking. 

Regulus’ relaxed breaths got caught in his throat. 

His skin was tingly all of a sudden.

His body knows who it is before he ever sees him. 

“James?” He whispers. If he’s wrong, he’ll be mortified. 

Finally the body moves out from behind the wall and into the light cast by the fast-illuminating sky. 

It was still almost completely dark. But the hope of light was there. Just barely. 

James looked how Regulus felt. 

Still, Regulus let out of a sigh of relief. 

“You scared me.” 

“I’m sorry.” His voice was low and held none of the joyous energy it usually does. “You scared me, too.” He whispers into the dark. 

“I apologize. I was actually on my way here before I…” He took a long pause. “Well I’m not entirely sure what happened.” 

“Regulus, what’s wrong?” James gets closer now and Regulus can see his eyes. They’re rimmed red, exactly like that day outside the train. Regulus’ heart clenches at the sight and the thought the he may have been the reason for those tears. 

“I’m fine.” He insists. “She hasn’t told me exactly what it is but I feel much better than I did yesterday.” 

James carefully perched himself the edge of Regulus’ bed. 

“Stop worrying yourself sick. I will be out of this very depressing room in no time.” He chuckles trying to make James smile. It doesn’t work nearly as well as he wanted it to. “Why are you up so early? I know you’re always awake before the birds but certainly not this early.” 

“I haven’t slept.” James mumbles, casting his eyes to his fidgeting hands. Regulus clocks the motion and sits all the way up to place his own hand on James’. 

James finally looks at him. 

“I was so worried.” He whispers. “When I found you, I thought you weren’t breathing.” 

Oh. 

Regulus was immediately cast into the dark side of his thinking. The side that houses death and chaos and destruction. 

He thought for a moment what he would do if he ever found James in the same state. 

He would cease all acts of life. He wouldn’t be able to do anything. He would be an empty shell of a person. Regulus is sure, in that moment, that if James Potter were to ever die, he would stop breathing altogether. 

“I’m so sorry.” 

“It’s not your fault.“ James shakes his head at the younger boy. “I miss you all the time.” He let’s his eyes fall shut, taking a deep breath. 

“I’m right here, golden boy.” Regulus whispers to him. “Lay down with me.” 

James opened his eyes. And turned to Regulus as if he was playing a trick on him. 

Regulus moved his whole body to one side of the bed, leaving a space for James to climb into. Then he laid back, turned on his side and looked at James again, who was still watching him. 

Regulus started tugging at James’ sleeve the way James himself would on any other day. And that makes the older boy finally crack and smile. 

He nods and fits himself perfectly beside Regulus. Laying flat on his back. 

“Sleep now.” Regulus whispers. 

James allowed his eyes to close, once again. 

Regulus watched as his breaths evened out and his face relaxed. He should not find the peace that he does with James. It should not be this way. 

But Regulus’ mind was finally allowing him to pulled under and he was not going to argue. So he let himself sleep. 

Unknowingly curling himself into the sleeping boy beside him. 

Madam Pomfrey entered Professor Dumbledore’s office in a flurry of excitement. But then again, she usually did everything in that manner. 

“Professor.” She called out. 

Dumbledore was sitting at his desk, waiting for her to find him. 

“Oh. Professor.” She was out of breath, from all the hurrying. “The youngest Black is in my infirmary.” 

This took Dumbledore back. 

“Was he injured? Was it a fight?” 

“No. He only has the flu. But the conditions that he’s been living in all summer made it almost fatal to him. Another student found him passed out in the corridor.” 

“Which student?”

“Which do you think, Professor?” She gave him a look. 

See, a few years back, Dumbledore told the entire faculty to report directly to him if absolutely anything came up with two specific students. 

James Potter and Regulus Black. 

The reason for this is a very simple one, but no professor ever asked him. They all just assumed that Dumbledore knew what he was doing and did the things he did for a purpose. 

“I don’t want to send him back. But I can’t keep him from his parents, not here. The laws we would be breaking are less important than the fact that Walburga wouldn’t care to burn down the school and everyone in it, to get her son back. And all for the wrong reasons.” Dumbledore puffs on his pipe in anxiety. 

“So what are we going to do?” 

Dumbledore thought about this for a long time. 

He only knows what he was told. 

Everything else is a complete mystery. 

So does he act and try to get Regulus Black out of 12 Grimmauld Place, or does he allow actions to take their own course?

He knows who he has to speak to about this. 

“Madam Pomfrey, I need you to tell Minerva that I will be gone for the rest of the day.” He moves to gather his things. 

“Professor, the boy has…scars. His neck, his back…” a tear fell from Madam Pomfrey’s eye. 

“If we’re going to do something, we must do it quickly.” He says. “I promise this won’t go on much longer. This wizard I’m meeting with today will help our situation, I think.” 

Dumbledore pauses for a moment. “Come. Let’s go check on him together.” 

So they set off for the infirmary. The castle was still sleeping, and they were silent as they traveled. 

After entering, Dumbledore heard no stirring. 

He assumed the boy was asleep. 

He was correct in his assumption. But what he saw when he rounded the corner threw him back to a time he was sure he had forgotten. Decades ago, with a boy he knew. 

Seeing two teenagers find comfort in each other like this was always something magical. But these two, specifically, made Dumbledore do a double take every time he saw them together. Sure that he was seeing a younger version of himself. 

Madam Pomfrey gasped when she saw the scene. 

And that woke the younger boy. 

He stirred and took in the scene before him. 

He said nothing. Only shaking his soundly sleeping friend until he woke and rolled right off the bed into the floor. 

“Shit.” He mumbled. 

Dumbledore had to stifle a laugh. 

James finally rose to his feet and smiled at them. 

“Good morning, professor.” He greeted quietly. “Madam Pomfrey.” 

“Mr. Potter. Nice to see you’re nursing your friend back to health.” Dumbledore told him, faking his ignorance. 

James’ face turned bright red. 

“I just came to see if you were on the mend, Mr. Black. How are you feeling?” The older man narrowed his eyes at the boy. 

“Better.” He said nodding. “What exactly was wrong with me?” 

“Just a common bout of sickness, Mr. Black. But with you not eating as much recently, it took a toll on your body.” She told him quietly. “It’s just the flu.” 

James Potter let’s out an audible sigh. 

Dumbledore knew that feeling all too well. 

“I’m keeping you for the rest of the day, but you can go back to the dungeons tonight after dinner.” Then she clacked away, presumably to get more medicine. 

All three boys watched her leave. 

Then they were left in silence. 

“Boys. I’ll be away. I don’t know how long, maybe a few days.” Both boys looked back at him with confusion and concern. “Just be cautious with yourselves while I’m away. I do worry quite a bit.” He smiled down at them, the way he wished someone had smiled at him, knowing that they wouldn’t carry the past the way he did.

“We worry about you, too, professor.” James told him quietly. 

“I appreciate that, Mr. Potter.” He turned to leave but stopped. “Oh, Mr. Potter, I’ll be informing your professors that you’re feeling under the weather and to not expect you.” Dumbledore put all his encouragement into the look he gave the boy. “Have a nice day, boys.” 

Then he disappeared, yet again, right in front of their eyes. 

“That was nice of him.” James said looking at the recently vacated spot on the floor. 

“You are going to lessons. I will not let you stay in here with me all day, bored senseless.” James was shaking his head before Regulus got the thought out. 

“Yes. You will. It’s already been taken care of, and I’m going to watch you eat something of substance, if it takes me all day, Regulus Black.” He crosses his arms and drops into a chair beside the bed, in a big huff. 

“Fine.” Regulus rolled his eyes. But the smile broke through two seconds later. “Thank you.” 

“Don’t thank me yet, baby Black. By the end of the day, you’ll be glad to get rid of me.” 

“Never.” Regulus shakes his head at him. 

“Regulus. Why aren’t you eating?” James turned serious so quickly that it gave Regulus whiplash. 

“It’s not that I didn’t want to. Recently, I just haven’t had the time.” He says quietly, looking down. 

“Hey.” James pulls his eyes back up. “I’m not blaming you. I didn’t mean for it to seem that way. I just want you to be as okay as you can be.” James pauses. Regulus sees something spark behind his eyes. “I’ll be right back.” 

He sprinted out of the room. 

Regulus was left in silence, once again. 

What just happened?

James ran as fast as his legs would carry him to Dumbledore’s office. 

He took the stairs up and thankfully he was still here. At his desk, writing something. James was afraid he had already left on his top secret mission. 

When his eyes fell on James, he smiled. 

“Mr. Potter. Are you alright?”

“Yes. Thank you, professor.” He took a deep breath. “I wanted to ask you something. But I need you to keep an extremely open mind.” 

“With you, James, always. Ask away.” 

“Well I’m not completely sure if you’re aware of Regulus’ home situation, you probably are because you know everything. But he’s…not…like that. He doesn’t agree with the…practices that go on there. My point is, his roommates aren’t helping the situation at all. They get him into unnecessary trouble which he doesn’t mind getting punished for because he thinks he deserves it. And they’re up, doing whatever they do, til the wee hours of the morning while he’s trying to rest. This can’t be good for his body. But I have a solution.” James is sure he didn’t take a breath the entire time he was speaking because he didn’t want Dumbledore to interrupt with his wisdom. 

“Well. Let’s hear it.” 

“You’re going to want to say no.” James puts his hands up as if to keep that answer at bay. 

Dumbledore only raises his eyebrows expectantly. 

“Technically. The room of requirement could end up having a bed in it, if one happened to find themselves needing such a thing.” He sped through his words. “I know yo-“ 

“I think it’s an excellent idea.” 

Before he could stop it, James mouth fell open. 

“Really?”

“Yes. I never did much care for students who bully others, for any reason. And if Regulus doesn’t want to stay there, if it’s making him physically ill, that seems like a perfectly good reason to move him to a ‘singular’ room. For his safety, of course.” 

James was beaming. He couldn’t will the smile to go down. 

“Of course. Thank you, professor.” He meant it with all his heart. Now his boy didn’t have to sleep with the snakes. 

“Now, because we are both aware of what Mr. Black’s home life is like, we will be keeping this amongst ourselves and the staff.” James nodded in complete sincerity. “Inform Regulus that he will still have the same curfew as any other student. I’ll have his things moved and he will report to the room of requirement tonight when Madam Pomfrey releases him.” James nodded again. Taking mental notes. “We will tell his roommates that he’s being moved per request of his mother, they shouldn’t ask too many questions.” He chuckles to himself. 

“Excellent thinking, sir.” 

“Off you go, Mr. Potter. Share the news with your friend.” 

“Thank you, again, Professor.” Then he was off again, before the headmaster could change his mind. Running even faster than he had been getting to Dumbledore’s office. 

Regulus was in the exact same spot that James had left him. He sat upright and alert when he saw him. 

“Where the hell did you run off to?” Regulus looked him up and down to make sure he was still in one piece. 

“Before you get angry that I did it without your permission, just know that I had to catch Dumbledore before he left or who knows how long he would’ve been gone.” 

“Did what?” Regulus couldn’t even begin to imagine what he had been discussing with Dumbledore that had anything to do with him. 

“How would you feel about, maybe, getting moved to your own room?” 

“What?” 

“How would you fee-“

“I heard that part.” Regulus held up a hand to stop him talking. The gears were turning in his brain. “Where would I go? All the rooms are filled.” 

“Not all of them.” James smirked. “I may have gotten Dumbledore to agree to let you stay in the room of requirement. Your health is one reason, but your roommates being walkers is another.”

Regulus looked twice as shocked as James had. 

“You’re not joking, right? If you’re joking, I’ll never forgive you.”

James laughed. “I’m not joking. Dumbledore’s gonna arrange the whole thing. Slughorn will tell your roommates that your mother is behind it. They’ll have your stuff moved, and you’ll go there when you leave here tonight.” 

James smiles big. Like the sun. Like three suns all shining their light on a strange boy with a terrible family. 

Regulus didn’t deserve him. 

After the shock wore off, all this adoration came flowing in behind it. In gallons, in tidal waves. He stood, turned to face James, and spoke quietly. 

“Stand up.” 

James was looking up at him with big eyes before he finally obeyed and stood. 

Regulus gave him no time before basically jumping into his arms. 

He wanted to kiss him. 

God knows, in that moment, Regulus wanted to kiss him. 

But, at this point, he was never going to risk this beautiful boy just for the satisfaction of his own ego. He was too important. And Regulus could live with it being one sided, as long as James never stopped being himself. 

So for now, Regulus settled for holding James in his arms. Nuzzling into his neck and capturing the feeling in his mind so he can live there later. 

“Thank you, golden boy.” He whispers. “You don’t know half of what it means to me that you did this.” 

“I can’t say I did it all for you. I saved myself a lot of worrying. Many sleepless nights.” He took a relieved sigh. “Expect me to be sneaking in next time I can’t be bothered to go to a lesson.” 

“You’re welcome anytime, James. Just because I’ll sleep there now doesn’t mean it isn’t still ours.” 

The words hang in the air above them, still holding each other, like they were made for it. 

“Good to know.” James whispered into his ear. 

“Can we go back to sleep now?” Regulus inquired. 

“Absolutely.” James chuckles and led the boy back to his bed. 

They did. They slept. And no one woke them. 

Regulus was fully recovered two days later. 

James began sneaking out of the tower at night, after that. None of the others ever asked him where he was going, just told him to be careful and send their regards to his mysterious friend. 

Remus knows more of the truth than the Sirius or Peter, but only a little. When he sees James leave, Remus smiles knowing that his best friend is happy. 

And then he quells Sirius’ fear of missing out, once James is gone. 

Maybe James’ new friend is unknowingly doing him a small favor. Since Christmas Sirius has been more open about things that bother him or things that make him softer. He’s learned to give James a little space but he’s also spending a little more time with Remus. Which is sending Remus to the moon in a rocket while simultaneously chipping away at his psyche. 

Things go on as they always have.