Chapter 11
James had tried his very best to explain to his friends exactly what had happened with Filch, but without much luck. He had left out a couple of details of course. None of them thought it was enough reason to have lost the bottle.
“No, Prongs listen to me. I understand that you seem to have a weird problem with authorities but this is our alcohol we are talking about. It is our livelihood. So I simply do not believe you” Sirius was standing in front of James, arms crossed, as Remus and Peter simply watched “I swear I am not lying. I went back to check the next morning and the bottle had disappeared. I'm sure it was just one of the Slytherins who found it. I will buy another” James tried to explain “Yes you will buy another. And seeing as we don't have any Veritaserum laying around, I suppose we will just have to trust you” Sirius said, finally sitting down “Thank you very much” James sighed, at his deeply mistrusting best friend “But seriously? Filch only gave you and Regulus detention?” Remus asked “Yeah? We were just past curfew, nothing too bad” James told him “Well that is true, but seeing as he found the two of you in a broom closet. Don't you think he might have feared you were doing other things?” Remus chuckled lightly, making James's stomach turn. Sirius let out a laugh “First of all, I am not even sure poor Filch knows about those types of things. Secondly, Prongs and my little brother? Sounds completely insane doesn't it?” Sirius asked, making James feel oddly guilty “Right, completely insane..” James was internally panicking.
After their little encounter in the broom closet, James hadn't been able to think about anything else. The way he had reacted to hearing Regulus call him by his first name? And merlin the way he had so desperately wanted to just be closer than they had been. Even though he had been plastered, he had somehow known it would be a bad idea, and held himself back. It had now been confirmed how terrible of an idea it would've been. Sirius would actually end up murdering him, if he ever found out how James was thinking about his little brother.
Saying that Regulus had been a mess after his little situation with James, would be a serious understatement. He had gone directly to his bed, and continued to scream into a pillow for about ten minutes. He had been so terribly angry with himself. Angry that he had actually let himself get trapped in his charm. He had let his guard down, which he had sworn to himself he would never let happen. He had been so wrapped up in the whole Evan thing, that he had failed to realise that he himself, was now starting to fall for the boy.
He had also been incredibly anxious immediately after. This was because he knew that they had crossed a boundary, one that they would be unable to come back from. He had called him James for god's sake, and he had actually liked it. He knew that this would also change the dynamic of their little nightly talks. He was completely doomed.
He was right. The way that James sat beside him had even changed. He could practically feel the anxiousness. He refused to be the first one to speak, but he knew James would cave quickly “You've read that one before” He said, making Regulus almost smile “I have” he said “It's that good?” James asked “Not particularly, just comforting to read something that I've already read” he explained “I can get around that. But doesn't it get boring at some point? I mean new things are great too” this made Regulus actually smile. It's so like him to say something like that “New things are great, yes, but also terrifying, and unpredictable” Regulus said, turning his head towards him “But that's the thrill of it right? Knowing it might not be what you think, but it ends up being better than you could've ever imagined..” Regulus knew now that they were not talking about books. And the way James was looking at him didn't make anything easier to understand “And what if it's not? What if it ends up actually making things worse?” he asked “It's impossible to know the outcome of every decision. But yes that is a possibility, but one that is worth the risk” James said, having looked at Regulus with the same softness he had the other night. Regulus felt lightheaded again, really not wanting to deal with this at the moment “Im tired” He got up, making James look at him in a way that made him wanna cry.
James hated how Regulus would just refuse to continue a conversation if he didnt feel like it. Simply walk away, and leave James even more confused than before. This meant that James was over the moon, as he spotted Regulus sitting alone by a tree in the courtyard. There were plenty of people around, which meant he was less likely to storm off on him.
James wasted no time, and went directly over there and sat beside him. Regulus looked over at him, weirdly confused. This was no different to their meetings in the astronomy tower, and he was acting like James had just hit him “Hi” James smiled “Hello? Do you not have class or something?” he asked slightly annoyed “Free period. I'm kinda glad i ran into you actually” James said “Why?” he sounded cold “Sorry I thought I had sort of made it clear that I enjoy your company” he chuckled making Regulus sigh “I have figured out that part, but-” he paused and looked around at all of the people that were around “What?” James asked clueless “It's sort of unusual for you to willingly sit with a Slytherin, especially me” Regulus explained “And? I couldn't care less what anyone thinks to be honest. Like I said I just felt like being in your company, if that's alright with you of course?” James explained, and watched how surprised he seemed as the words left his mouth “Oh. Well I don't mind” He admitted “Lovely, what are you reading?” James asked, leaning against the tree behind the, earning a light smile from Regulus.
James was running dangerously fast down the hallway. He had just let a bunch of cornish pixies into Slughorn's office. Everyone else had other business to attend, so he had volunteered to do it, but had quickly regretted that decision. He hadn't realised the fact that he had no idea how to handle the pixies, and had ended up being forced to slam the door on one of them. Which was why he was now running.
He was suddenly stopped by running into another person “Potter?” Regulus had a book in his hands, and was looking extremely confused at James “I told you to call me James” he chuckled, slightly out of breath. “Right, my apologies. James what on earth are you doing running around the dungeons and this hour?” Regulus chuckled “I was just. Well actually I'm afraid I cannot tell you what I was doing” James told him “Ah, another prank Im guessing?” he asked “Yes, that much I can say. Where were you going? Since you're asking me questions” James asked him “Well seeing as you have been following me there almost every night for about a month, it shouldn't be much of a surprise should it?” Regulus had smirked lightly at him “Right, astronomy tower of course. Can I come?” He just asked “Well, If I were to say no, I am pretty sure you would anyways. So sure” Regulus said, and simply started walking, with James tracing behind him, like a lost puppy.
They were back in their usual spots. Regulus trying to read, and James making that almost impossible, with his insane amount of questions. But this time, James figured he should maybe try to tone it down a bit, in case Regulus was getting tired of him. He wasn't sure if he would be able to handle not seeing him every night.
“But you do seem to know quite a lot about basically all of it” James said “Well the whole astrology thing was always my mother. Which explains our names, I kinda think the whole thing is dumb, because……” Regulus started sort of rambling about the whole thing. Any other person would probably have asked him to shut up or something, but James felt the exact opposite. He was interested in literally anything he could have to say, he would sit and listen for hours if he had to. He felt himself being so mesmerised by the way he spoke, the way he knew so much. Even if James couldn't care less about the subject, he would find it interesting the second it came from his mouth.
James watched as he was looking directly in front of him as he spoke, using his hands quite a lot, making a piece of curl fall into his face. He didn't think, he didn't hesitate even slightly. He simply reached up, very gently placing the curl back behind his ear, but let his hand stay softly cupping his face.
This had of course made Regulus stop talking, and was now looking directly at James. James felt how warm his cheek was, despite it being terribly cold. He felt him lean slightly into his hand, his eyes softening as he lifted his chin to look at James. He felt as though the air had been sucked out of his lungs.
He wasn't really in control of his actions anymore, which made him run his thumb softly over his bottom lip. This of course made Regulus part his lips, and made James unable to function. He wanted badly to kiss him, but was also afraid that he might be overstepping. As his mind was racing, he felt Regulus lean slightly forward, as a way of saying it was okay.
James suddenly felt nervous. He couldn't remember the last time he had been nervous before kissing someone. He had always felt like the outcome didn't really matter. But this one did. It mattered so much to him, and it felt like the most important thing in the world that he did this right. It was as if he were to do something wrong, his whole world would collapse.
He finally came to the realisation that overthinking it wasn't going to help him. He leaned closer, and simply just kissed Regulus.
Oh?
This was the way a kiss was supposed to feel, was his first thought. It hadn't ever been like that with Lily, Evan, or anyone else he had ever kissed. It was like one of those dumb muggle movies he had watched as a kid, where they would describe the kiss as fireworks. This was exactly how it felt. His entire body filled with them, somehow making the nervousness from before vanish completely.
He felt Regulus pull him closer, and felt himself melting completely into it.
They were of course forced to breathe at some point. Now that James was looking at Regulus, his lips and cheeks bright pink, he saw how scared he looked. He wasn't really able to understand why at first. Had he been a bad kisser? Had he not actually wanted him to kiss him?
“Sorry” Regulus said “I-I won't tell anyone, don't worry” he sounded so insecure it broke James's heart, because he finally got why. Regulus was scared that James was just kissing him as a prank or to mess with him somehow, because of how most people treated Regulus at Hogwarts after his transition “No I- I don't care about that. Merlin Reg I just…” James simply pulled him back in and kissed him. Regulus was hesitant at first, but finally got the point, relaxing into it. James felt at peace, like a weight had been lifted off his chest.