Maybe you are bad at this
The next morning was the one Lirum had dreaded all year, their birthday. They woke up in the common room. It smelled of fireplace smoke and even though the fire had died still kept its signature warmth. As they rolled over to face what was left of the embers they noticed the pillow that had been tucked lovingly beneath them while they slept, left to replace a certain redhead who’d seemingly gone back to his own bed.
Lirum stretched and stood from the sofa. They inched closer to the fireplace looking for where the extra kindling was kept. Shortly they found some extra wood and set it gently on the embers. Then settling on the floor in front of it. It was quite like early mornings tend to be, when they heard something stir behind them.
“Is it alright if I sit here?” Percy asked, quietly. Lirum was a bit shocked to hear him.
“Shouldn’t you be asleep? The suns barely risen, and I’m sure I fell asleep before you.” Lirum asked, confused. They’d thought for sure he’d gone back to his own dorm.
“Is that a no?” He asked, looking down at them.
“Not at all, please make yourself at home, this is your common room after all.” Lirum said, rubbing the spot on the floor next to them.
“Well, it’s also your bedroom for the week, and this is your personal space. Which I seem to have ignored recently.” Percy started as he took a seat on the floor beside Lirum. “I’m sorry about that, truly, and I mean that. I know I’ve been to much. Are you at least feeling better?”
“Perce, I’ll be alright. Stop worrying about me.” Lirum bumped their shoulder against his trying to force him to loosen up.
“I can’t, is it something I did?” He asked looking at the fire, blue eyes swimming deeply with concern.
“No Perce, you’re ok. We’re going to be alright.” Lirum said, joining him looking at the fire.
“Will you tell me what’s wrong?” He asked, taking his glasses off and holding them.
“Part of me wants to, part of me-I don’t know.” They stopped themself, hoping that would be enough.
“You don’t know?” He asked, looking back from the fire.
“The other part of me is still stuck there at that moment. With no voice, frozen and unable to be anywhere else. Helpless,” Lirum explained, pulling the blankets tighter.
“Lirum,” Percy started quietly. “Is this about-no you clearly aren’t comfortable and I need to stop pushing.”
“Thank you Percy, but you’re alright. I know you’re just worried.” The nudged him again. “I’m glad we were able to talk this morning, at least a bit. The quiet together has been really nice.”
“I think we still have a good bit we needed to talk about though. I’ve been quite the ass to you the past few weeks.” He said dropping his glasses in his lap and rubbing his hands together before holding them out to the fire.
“And I’ve been quite snappy with you in return. I did go a bit too far a few times.” Lirum mentioned.
“I deserve it.” Percy said, picking his glasses back up to put them on.
“No Percy even if I’m angry with you it doesn’t give me the right to-'' they were cut off by the sound if feet pattering down the stairs.
“You two are up rather early!” Called out rushing down with more sets of steps following behind him. A groggy George, who glared at his twin for shouting so early. Their sister who waddled behind them. And the trio of Gryffindors who seemed far too excited for it to be that early.
“You’ll join in our Gobstones tournament today won’t you Perce?” George asked, stretching.
“Unlike you, I’m a school prefect . Who only stayed over brake to help the teachers through these troubled times. I will be having no part in this childish behavior.” Percy snapped back.
“Oh yeah? It had nothing to do with your girlfriend staying?” Fred teased.
“Penelope is not my girlfriend! And even if she was not, she did not.” Percy bellowed.
“Oh no, did I have it backwards? Well, wood went home? So you must have stayed to stalk Lirum!” Fred announced like it had been a groundbreaking discovery.
“Well Lirum, will you be joining us for gobstones?” George asked, ignoring his brother's antics.
“Honestly? I think the library sounds like much more fun than being around someone who’s acting like an arse.” They answered politely.
“That sounds like an excellent idea, let’s go.” Percy said, pulling Lirum out of the common room behind him.
“Percy slow down!” Lirum cried Not enjoying the feeling of being dragged.
“I’m sorry.” He said stopping in the middle of the hall letting them go immediately.
“Percy, are you alright?” They asked, watching the normally put together boy pace the hall.
“It’s like their favorite thing in the world is to make a fool of me! To torment me, for anything and everything I have ever felt!” He said running his hands through his unkempt hair.
“Percy,” Lirum started, coming closer to the distressed boy.
“It’s always like this! It’s always been like this! I’m not allowed to do anything or like anything or I have to sit there and listen to it thrown in my face! I just have to sit there and take it too, the only other option is to leave and hope they don’t follow me. I’m surprised they haven’t.” He cried looking as if he might pull his own hair out.
“Hey, it’s ok Perce. We’re gonna be in the library right far from them in the common room. It’ll just be us too right, like this morning. If they try to follow us I’ll tell them to sod off myself. Does that sound all right?” Lirum said, pulling him away from the common room.
“It sounds really nice.” Was all he said.
He followed them quietly to the library. All that could be heard was the clicking of shoes on stone as they walked down the corridor. They entered the library and found their table as easy as ever before settling into it. Once they’d sat in their normal place and Percy looked up at them silently.
“Are you feeling any better now?” Lirum asked, unsure where to go from there.
“Thank you, I’m sorry you had to see me like that.” He said taking off his glasses and setting them on the table. “I think you’re the only person who’s ever not blamed me.”
“What?” Lirum asked, confused.
“At most it's always been telling them to knock it off, and saying it’s just a little teasing, they don’t mean anything by it, or you're older, just let it go, it’s not something to fight over, act your own age. Certainly not called either of them an arse or threatened to tell them to sod off if they came back.” He ran his hands through his hair again and over his face but laughed at the end.
“Do you think I won’t?” Lirum asked, hoping to lighten the mood.
“Oh you certainly will, and that’s the thing about you isn’t it? That you always will, even when no one else has. Whether it’s Me, or George, or Fred, or that first year girl Luna, or even Harry bloody Potter, you’ll never just stand there.”
“Well I learned what just standing there gets you, so I don’t plan on that again.” They joked a bit somberly.
“Why do you have to be this way?” He asked, leaning against the table, head in hands.
“What do you mean I just told you?” They laughed.
“No you talk about everything like it’s fine but give no indication of how to get there. Kids sneaking out to smuggle a dragon, it’s fine, they’re trying to steal a magic rock they think a teacher is after, it’ll be alright I can handle it. Mystery blood writing in the wall, just get everyone to bed it’s gonna be ok. A giant snake appeared and chased you and my brothers through the school, shrugging it off right. You told me that I have a problem with pretending things away and pushing them under the rug but you do it constantly. What do you mean you learned what it gets you? You can’t just say that and not expect me to worry.”
“I from my parents. We where playing hide and seek, and we’d been for a while. It was my favorite game after all and who can say no to a kid on their birthday. We were just meant to be killing time, my grandfather was supposed to be coming later for the party when my mother pulled me close and told me this time to find my best spot, no rules this time. That I should go there and not come out unless they caught me. Not to make a sound either I couldn’t give away my spot. Well I had to have done a good job, because that was the day they died.” Lirum explained putting on their bravest face.
“I’m so- godric I-“ He sighed deeply into his hands before looking up to Lirum half of his face still covered. “Merlin. Today’s your birthday.”
“Yeah, I told you it wasn’t you.” Lirum joked again trying their hardest not to spur the mood.
“I’ve been such an arse!” Percy screamed at himself.
“It’s al-“
“No! You have put up with me making every decision for you since Halloween, I’ve dragged you through the halls and refused to listen when you’ve told me to stop. I’ve attempted to banish you to your dorm room.” He said looking back at them.
“Would you like to make it up to me?” Lirum asked gingerly
“Is their even a way?” Percy asked, looking like a kicked puppy.
“Tell me what else has been bothering you, it's more than a little obvious. You’ve never been so pushy unless you’re stressed beyond belief, something must have happened.” Lirum explained.
“I-I can’t. It’s all-“ he stuttered, stalling for an excuse.
“Percy Weasley, you made me talk about my dead parents on their damned anniversary!” Lirum snapped.
“It’s quite a lot.” He said again hoping for a way out.
“Good thing we have quite a lot of time.” Lirum replied in a snarky tone.
“Well then, I believe we’ve already talked about the twins. Do I guess next would be ron?” He asked awkwardly.
“It sounds as good a place to start as any.” They replied watching the boy wring his hands in anxiety.
“I got in quite a bit of trouble for not watching him well enough when he got put in the hospital last year, and then again when he stole the car. Both times he was with Harry, mind you. I swear that boy is trying to get them both killed, but still I should have watching them, but I was distracted.” He said softly at first but grew harsher as he went.
“What about the teachers? They should have been watching him, not you Percy!” Lirum argued.
“Well, I am the oldest.” Percy started awkwardly.
“Certainly not older than the professors, and as for the car, why wasn’t your mother watching them!” The ravenclaw pointed out.
“It’s Ginny’s first year.” Percy explained.
“And your father, where was he?” Lirum asked.
“Again, it was Ginny’s first year.” Percy shrugged.
“And they both walked with her? What about last year? It was Ron’s first year and your father wasn’t in sight!” Lirum said, baffled.
“It’s different-“ he started.
“How? They need to be there for the last one's first year? Why couldn’t they have seen all their kids through the gates instead of leaving two behind! They still would have been there to see her off!” Lirum argued, not understanding why Percy seemed to just accept this.
“I still should have-“ he started again, but Lirum wouldn’t have it.
“Both of your parents were there, and it was your job to take care of their children?” Lirum was shocked, disbelief clouding their ability to use their manners.
“I’m the oldest.” Percy said again as of it made the whole thing better.
“That doesn’t make it ok! That’s their kids! You are also their child! It’s their responsibility to take care of the kids they had, not yours!” Lirum argued, trying to get through Percy’s thick skull.
“There’s too many of us for them to watch us all.” Percy argued, pinching his brow as if Lirum was the one being stubborn.
“Then why did they have that many! They made them! It’s their job to look after them! It’s not your job to be the father of your siblings!” Lirum snapped.
“If I don’t do it, who will!” He argued getting heated now.
“Your father! Or your mother! The actual parents!” Lirum argued back.
“And I when we’re here away from home?” Percy said arms crossed like he’d made some grand point.
“The professors! The ones you say all the time are here to guide and protect the students!” Lirum said, shooting up from the table out of rage.
“We both know it’s rubbish! They haven’t done a single thing for the students all year! There's a giant snake slithering about, writing in blood on the walls and students being petrified, on top of the rampant and ongoing bullying, sneaking out and skipping class happening! I’ve been here trying to at least make sure that you and my siblings alright but I can’t watch everyone! All I can do is try but it’s not enough! I let that Creevey boy get petrified, Ginny’s been sick all year, and my brothers are all determined to get themselves expelled! Then suddenly you started fighting me in the one thing I can do to make sure you’re safe and I don’t know what to do!” Percy ranted in tears.
“None of that’s your fault Percy.”
“You almost got eaten by a giant snake because I lost my composure.”
“No, I almost got eaten because I stubbornly thought I couldn’t solve a problem much bigger than myself.”
“I knew that every time you end up in an argument you sneak out! After you used the binding curse in me I should have been out there! I knew you’d sneak out and I stayed in my common room and sat by the bloody fire to read! When I should have went out to look for you! Fred and George went after you! I didn’t even know they left!” He cried
“And my actions are my own, Percy. You can’t blame yourself for what I do, or your brothers for that matter.” Lirum said, reaching a hand across the table to comfort him. “We both needed time to calm down. You being out looking for me would have only made both of us angrier.”
“But I could have tried. It would have been something.” Percy said, staring down at Lirum’s hand in his arm. “Merlin, what a mess am I, letting you comfort me? It’s your parent’s anniversary. It should be you crying, and me doing anything in my power to stop it. Why can’t I even do that?”
“Hey!” Lirum said with a smack to his shoulder. “Stop that right now or I’ll drag you back to the Gryffindor common room and you can go play Gobstones with your brothers. You’ve been stressed and you’re making up for forcing me to talk about my parents again by telling me what’s going on since you won’t talk about it any other way! Now you’re going to let me comfort you, even if I’m bad at it!”
“You’re ridiculous, you know that?” Percy said with a faint smile pulling at his lips. “And you’re not bad at it, except when you hit me and threaten me, you know what? Maybe you are bad at it.” He joked.
He laughed, breaking the tense atmosphere that had formed at the beginning of their argument. He smiled gratefully though he wouldn’t say it he’d clearly needed to talk about what had been happening.