misfortune
Regulus thought he was unlovable, well he knew it since he was pretty young. His father thought he wasn't as smart as Sirius (little Reg preferred arts) and his mother hated him for no reason. At first, he questioned why. Regulus would cry at night, under his blanket, and on cold winter nights, praying that his mother would magically be proud of him one day. It never happened.
But then when Regulus he a teenager. He was too similar to his mum. So similar that they had the same glare, they were both left-handed, had a weird enthusiasm for chocolate, and were also a perfectionist. This made his mum, Regulus figured, made her feel like he was looking in a mirror. A mere reflection of her past self, how happy she was unmarried, and her crushed dreams. Naturally that anger or whatever was dumped at Regulus. As an adult Regulus rarely felt sad about his mother, he just made it look like she passed away. But, that was not real life, it was in his heart.
All this was going on in his head whilst, on a car ride home, James was driving a grinning like a fool.
The trip went well, from James's perspective because Regulus talked to him again thus everything was sunshine and rainbows. And the interactive games that James planned out (which Regulus found extremely boring) like drawing maps and stuff went well. But he appreciated James's enthusiasm.
But then, Regulus remembered that today was the day his loving mother is going to visit, and Sirius and him were having dinner at Sirius's house today. And from what Regulus heard James is coming as well. Regulus at first begged Sirius for James to not come but then Sirius said that James had a "comedic effect" that would make their Victorian-era mother less scary. Which Regulus decided to believe.
"What are you, thinkin' love?" James asked as he glanced at Regulus quickly before looking back at the road.
"Oh," Regulus's face looked like he was dying rather than thinking "Nothing. Just, uh, zoning out a bit"
Well, that was an awful lie.
"The dinner is gonna be fine," James assured him "I'm sure your mother is a respectable woman?"
Regulus didn't want to ruin the mood and tell James every trauma so Regulus just nodded and gave James a nice enough smile for him to smile back.
"It's all gonna be just fine. We have been dating for half a day and I'm already meeting your mum, how lovely?"
James squeezed Regulus's hollow cheeks hard until Regulus laughed (not those fake and scary ones) and slapped his hand away.
"That's my Reggie"
Regulus secretly wished to be as content as James.
-
It was almost late at night when they finally arrived at Srius's place. Sirius wasn't home because he went to the airport to fetch Walburga. So James, due to Regulus's request was cuddling him.
"Didn't you say that you hated hugs?"
"On some occasions, I do," Regulus said quietly. He nudged closer at James's chest burying his face like a little cat.
James only smiled and tangled his hand on Regulus's curls.
If only they could stay like this forever.
Half an hour passed and Sirius still hasn't returned.
"Has my brother," Regulus raised a quizzical brow "killed my mum?"
"Maybe" James laughed. He hoped that Sirius was mature enough not to start any fights along the ride.
Five minutes later, Regulus heard the keys. His posture immediately changed as did his expression.
"Are you sure your mother isn't the queen of England? you look like your about to courtesy and give her flowers"
"Shut up, it's muscle memory"
The door finally opened and James saw Walburga at first glance. James finally knew why Sirius and Regulus called her their Victorian-era mother. She wore a long dress, all black, with a hat that James respected looked like dead crows on her head. It was astonishing how her glare looked exactly like Regulus's, no she was a copy of him. Same hollow cheeks and curls. James also noticed the heavy perfume, it was Dior perhaps. Sirius wears that. Her nails were painted bright red and as she waved at James it almost felt like she was showing off her huge emerald engagement ring.
James got chills from waving back. James finally gets it. Walburga Black was as terrible as the Black brothers described her.
Terrible.
As hard as was James trying to keep a smile on his face, he saw Sirius shutting the door behind Walburga. Unlike Regulus Sirius didn't mind not hiding his disguise for his mother. It was written all over his face his lack of enthusiasm. On the contrary, Regulus was forcing a hard smile. Is back was straight as a ruler, hands on his lap and James just noticed Regulus cut off his front bangs. James once hears Walburga doesn't like the brothers looking like people out of a rock band. Apparently, it reminds her too much of their cousin Andromeda that she "couldn't bear it". Not to mention Sirius took off all of his rings and earrings, he looked miserable. Sirius might need a good shag with Remus after this.
That's easy too be said about Sirius, James doesn't know if dicking down Regulus would solve all of these problems but if it does he would have done it already.
Walburga walked up to James suddenly and offered a hand. James stood up in a panic causing the chair to scrape against the floor. James saw Regulus's lips slowly turn into a downward smile as he quickly flipped his head to greet her.
"Hello, I'm James. Nice to meet you, Mrs. Black." James sort of did a bow that made Walburga cringe a bit but she still accepted it.
"I know. I've already heard your name enough times." She tilted to the side to see Regulus, James was covering him because he was so tall. But he did it for a reason "Aren't you gonna great me, child? No matter how much you hated or hate me I am your mother. You should respect me" She said with her chin upwards towards the sky as she was making sure the people present knew that was in fact their elder.
"It's not like you are a stranger to me mother, I have seen you enough times, I recognize you, still"
She opened her mouth to say something but was quickly interrupted by a loud bang of Sirius smashing the huge plate of spaghetti on the table.
"You are lucky we still recognize you as a mother"
Walburga quickly pointed at Sirius with her long fingers. "Don't you dare try me when they are guests around!"
James quickly tugged Regulus to sit down and quickly served both of them. Sirius only glared at her and left to grab some shredded cheese.
"How is work?" Walburga started, James wondered if all she cared about was rank and money, turn out he was quite right. Walburga didn't even let Regulus respond and kept going with her questions "Have you found a girlfriend yet? because if not your father found you a perfect match. She's a lawyer's daughter. I think she works at the same university as you do. Pandora Rosier? Or was it Lovegood?"
"Mother, we are just friends, don't force it"
"I'm trying to keep the family lineage, since your brother" Walburga sighed heavily and slowly placed her fork on the table "I have no hope for"
"Well, surprise Mother, we don't want to continue this. It's already bad enough. Plus Andromeda already has kids, why bother us?"
"She's not carrying the Black surname is she."
Regulus stopped talking after that. Walburga went on and on about how the brothers were a shame and whatever. Sirius was so furious that he didn't even really eat,
James was almost restraining his urge to roll his eyes. Regulus almost broke down but James held his hand under the table. And caressed his thigh when he got too anxious.
"You two are such a disgrace," She said suddenly and Sirius could not handle any more.
"Well Mother if you keep talking bullshit I suggest you may leave," Sirius stood up, James never heard Sirius raise his voice this high "We did our best, it's not our fault that your parenting is shit. And I rather have a not-so-fortunate mother that does love us and not you who you wish to think that you don't use us as tools but surprise you do!"
Walburga just stood there, shocked. "Language Sirius! Mr. Potter is here, you are embarrassing yourself"
"Mother unlike you, we don't care about being civil or nice because you yourself are quite the opposite of that, I can assure you"
"Enough! Grounded both of you!"
Regulus finally spoke after he stayed silent during the whole meal "We are not kids anymore. We have freedom. You have yours. It's time you let go. This already ended a long time ago"
"Fine," She said after a long pause "Have it your way. You two shall be motherless"
Walburga stood up, didn't even bother picking up her bag, and left.
Regulus burst into tears.
"I've spent my whole life following her rules, like a bird in a cage," He whimpered "And still, it was never enough"
Sirius laughed, a cold, emotionless laugh.
"You really thought she cared? I'm calling Moony, he could come over. Im going downstairs to buy some beer. Be back soon"
James didn't speak, he didn't know what to say for the first time.
After Sirius left James cuddled Regulus in his arms, sometimes actions speak more than words.
"I really tried to convince you we could even have dinner" Regulus sniffed "But I lied. We are a disaster."
James only smiled and hugged him closer "Didn't quite believe you anyway"
"I can't lie can I?"
"You can tell me some pretty lies, you're so beautiful I can't help but believe in each and every one."
"This is not the time, James" Regulus looked up at James, his eyes watery and nose running. James thought he looked quite cute.
"You are done with her, you should feel happy," James whispered and kissed Regulus's forehead.
"What do you mean I am done?"
"You tried, but it didn't work. You are enough. Some parents don't deserve kids. You should be happy that you don't have to deal with her anymore."
Regulus didn't say anything. But it was apparent that James knew everything. He was not childish. He is mature with a free spirit like a child.
"Who wants some beer?" Sirius entered the living room, James and Regulus obviously didn't hear the door open.
"AHHH, REMUS! AHH," He screamed. Sirius covered his eyes with both hands.
"What, love?" Remus came closely behind him and rested his chin on Sirius's shoulder.
"Ah," Remus acted surprised and winked at James.
Looks like the brothers have other things to worry about that is not their mother.