Birthing
After being flamed half to death in the group chat, MG Coin (To the Moon!) had gone surprisingly quiet for a few hours. That alone should’ve been the red flag.
Then, out of nowhere—
Jeon-Yeong (188) added Dae-Ho (388)
Mi-Na (196): “Okay who’s this one? Is this another cousin or…?”
Jeon-Yeong (188): “Nope. MG bribed me with a spa gift card and the promise to stop DMing me crypto reels. You're welcome.”
Dae-Ho joined with a polite:
“Hello, everyone. Hope you’re all recovering well. If anyone’s ever near Haeundae, I make a mean espresso at Café Marine.”
His name: “Actual Gentleman”
His profile pic? Him in a barista apron, smiling like he hadn’t just survived psychological warfare.
The group… paused.
Soo-Ha (400): “Wait… someone here is actually NORMAL?”
Soo-Young (308): “There’s always one stable one in every chaos group.”
Do-Yoon (197): “Why is he giving me respectful green-flag energy and why do I hate it?”
Then MG Coin finally reappeared.
MG Coin (To the Moon!):
“Surprise! That’s my man. We woke up post-game on the same sidewalk, made out before even asking names. He’s mine now.”
Thanos (230): “I’m gonna be sick. Not because of the PDA, but because I KNOW you’re someone’s ex and baby daddy.”
Nam-Gyu (124): “Wait—IS THAT TRUE???”
Se-Mi (380): “I’ve seen enough drama to know the baby mama’s about to walk in three... two...”
Yun-Hee (031) added Jun-Hee (222)
Her name popped in with a little hospital emoji beside it. Chat name? “Giving Birth, BRB”
The typing bubble appeared immediately.
Jun-Hee (222):
“Hi everyone! Currently in labor but wanted to say: MG, you’re lucky I’m numb from the waist down or I’d come swing on you.”
Mi-Na (196): “WHAT IS GOING ON.”
Jeon-Yeong (188): “Yun-Hee. You didn’t.”
Yun-Hee (031): “Oh, I did.”
Jun-Hee (222):
“Imagine being in active labor and finding out your baby daddy is playing happy couple with a marine barista in a group chat full of traumatized divas.”
MG Coin (To the Moon!): “We agreed on joint custody—”
Jun-Hee (222): “OF WHAT? You don’t even know the hospital name I’m in.”
Dae-Ho (388): “Would this be a bad time to offer her a coupon for free coffee?”
Mi-Na (196): “Dae-Ho I SWEAR TO GOD you’re too wholesome for this group.”
Soo-Young (308): “Let him live. I’d take the coffee.”
Min-Su (125): “…I’m so emotionally overwhelmed right now…”
Thanos (230): “Someone better livestream this birth. I’m already invested.”
Nam-Gyu (124): “Name the baby Squidward out of respect.”
Jeon-Yeong (188):
“Okay but real talk—if this baby comes out looking like MG, I’m gonna need to see the receipts.”
Jun-Hee (222): “I’ll send a pic once I’m done pushing a watermelon out of my body, thanks.”