MG Coin
That morning, while the group chat was surprisingly calm (minus Thanos sending questionable thirst traps and Nam-Gyu quoting conspiracy TikToks), a new name suddenly appeared at the top of the screen:
Jeon-Yeong (188) added Lee Myung-Gi
The profile picture was a perfectly-filtered selfie of a man in a designer tracksuit, holding a mic in one hand and a champagne glass in the other.
His chat name? “MG Coin (To the Moon!)”
Thanos (230): “I KNOW YOU DIDN’T JUST ADD MG COIN TO THIS CHAT.”
Nam-Gyu (124): “IS THIS A JOKE OR AM I HAVING A TRAUMA FLASHBACK??”
Do-Yoon (197): “Wait. Is that the crypto guy?”
Gyeong-Su (256): “Oh my god. Thanos told me about him. This is the guy who made you invest your mom’s house money, right??”
Thanos (230): “HE SAID IT WAS A LIMITED TIME OPPORTUNITY.”
Nam-Gyu (124): “He made me invest during the ‘pre-launch’ phase. IT NEVER LAUNCHED.”
Myung-Gi, unaware or entirely too aware, popped in casually:
MG Coin (To the Moon!): “Wassup fellow survivors! So honored to be here. Also if any of y’all are interested in NFTs—”
Before the group could explode any further, Jeon-Yeong, sipping her morning iced Americano like it was a shield, casually dropped the bomb:
Jeon-Yeong (188):
“Oh yeah, btw he’s my cousin.”
Silence.
Soo-Young (308): “I’m sorry. WHAT.”
Mi-Na (196): “You brought a crypto scammer into our sacred chat and waited until AFTER the backlash to tell us he’s family?”
Yun-Hee (031): “Girl. We need to talk about your boundaries.”
Soo-Ha (400): “This group is so broken it’s literally healing me.”
Nam-Gyu (124): “No because how are YOU a genius psychiatrist and HE’S… HIM.”
Thanos (230): “Cousin or not, I’m still suing him when I get emotionally stable enough.”
MG Coin (To the Moon!): “LMAO love the energy. Let’s channel that into crypto.”
Jeon-Yeong (188):
“Look. We all have demons. Mine happens to be named Lee Myung-Gi and shows up at family funerals in a Lambo.”
Se-Mi (380): “I can’t tell if this is tragic or a genius origin story.”
Min-Su (125): “This is stressing me out but also kind of fascinating…”
Mi-Na (196): “Okay, but if he tries to sell MG Coin one more time, I will throw hands. Digitally.”
Jeon-Yeong changed Myung-Gi’s nickname to: “Family Mistake”
Myung-Gi sent one final message:
“Haters are just future investors who haven’t realized it yet.”
Thanos (230): “Someone please remove him before I fall for it again.”