Worried about you
James Pov.
James had been excited to meet regulus all day. When they finally met at the astronomy tower he was overjoyed.
But something had been weird.
Since they were dating regulus had changed when he was with James. He had started to trust him. James was happy about that. He wanted regulus to feel save. But regulus still had a hard time to be himself.
He was scared that James wouldn’t like him anymore. At least that’s what James tough it was. Some kind of trauma response. Sirius had that too, especially at the beginning of their friendship. He couldn’t trust anyone because his parents made him think that no one cared about him.
James hated their parents in every possible way.
But still, regulus had been so touchy. He usually didn’t really like physical contact and James respected that. But he let James hold him the whole night over till the sun started to rise.
He said that he had to go so nobody would see that they’d been together. He didn’t want anyone to know about them and James understood. The whole school would take about nothing else and he didn’t want to be killed by Sirius either.
But regulus had left so suddenly, it was confusing. First he didn’t let go of James and then he just left him.
James walked back to his doom and sneaked back into bed without waking his friends. If Sirius would find out that he sneaked out every other night he would not stop arguing with James till he would tell him everything. That couldn’t happen.
But it would be nice to have someone to talk to about all this. He worried about Reggie a lot. He hadn’t really told him anything. Not that he usually did but it just hadn’t felt right. What if something had happened? He needed to know if something had happened! But if he pressured regulus to talk to him, he would shut down completely. That was the last thing James wanted. He just had to hope that regulus would come to him.
——————————————————————————————
James had eventually fallen asleep to his thoughts. Not for long though, it was a normal school day.
He was tired of course, he had barely gotten any sleep. But at least he had seen regulus. James really hopped that his friends wouldn’t notice that he was somewhere completely else with his mind. Sirius and Pete didn’t, they just told him that he looked tired. James had shrugged and mumbled something. But they weren’t really paying attention to him anymore.
But when they were on their way to get breakfast Remus had softly placed a hand on his shoulder.
“Are you okay, James? You seem a little distracted.”
“What? Oh sorry about that I just don’t feel so well, but it’s really nothing,” he quickly answered. If Remus continued to ask him question he wasn’t sure if he would be able to lie about the whole situation. He hated lying to his friends.
“Are you sure about that? You know we’re all here for you if you need us,” Remus gently told him.
James sight. “Yeah, of course. Thank you Remus but it’s really nothing.”
“If you say so,” Remus said, taking his hand of James shoulder. He was smiling at him but there was some kind of worry in his eyes.
He probably had the same thoughts about James behaviour, that James had about regulus’.
James didn’t like the fact that people were worried about him. He was not important right now.