“I’m a werewolf.” Remus said, looking mournfully up at Lily.
It was the first time he’d ever told her, it was the first time he’d ever told anyone. The boys had figured it out and other than a few jokingly mentions it was not actually spoken. He thought he’d never tell anyone. That he’d never need to tell anyone, because he had them? He had his idiots. But maybe. Maybe his idiots weren’t actually there. Maybe he just thought they were.
“Oh.” Lily spoke, barely a whisper.
“And Snape knows. Sirius told him- and I’m scared. I’m so scared that he’ll tell everyone I’m so scared Sirius-”
“Oh Remus..” Lily said, bringing him into an embrace, holding him tightly. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” And as she spoke Remus began to feel more tears drop down. As she held him tight, whispering sweet nothings Remus began to sob. Had he lost them..? Peter would never be able to choose, James can’t lose Sirius and Sirius- oh.. he can’t lose Sirius.
“I can’t lose him..” Remus whispered, the words tightening in on him.
“You shouldn’t have to. It’ll be up to you what you choose to endure. It’s your choice to put distance. It might take time but there can be recovery.”
“I know- but James… When James stays, it hurts. He’ll stand by me you know? He’ll support me. And I can’t be the reason they lose each other. I can’t!”
“You don’t have to be. Whatever you choose to do, it’s separate from James. You’re not his choice maker.”
“Did you know..? You’re so calm, did you know?” Remus left the embrace just to hold her hand. Staring at her. She couldn’t lie to him.
“I had my suspicions, you got sick so often- it was concerning… And those period jokes, they ah- sort of gave it away.”
“Fucking period jokes. It hurts you know?”
“I know bloody well it hurts.”