Pomphrey and new friendships
Remus timedley opened the door and made his way inside. Mcgonigal was sitting at her desk, another woman was in her office facing her. She had her back to Remus, leaning on his head of houses desk. She turned around and stood properly when he entered, placing her hand on Mcgonigal’s shoulder. She was wearing a traditional nurses uniform, (the school nurse Remus concluded) her mousy brown hair was in a french plait going down her back, stopping just above her small.
“Hello, Remus dear, how was your dinner?” Mcgonigal gestured for him to take a seat in front of her. “tea?”
Remus shook his head, “no ,thank you. Dinner was good. You wanted to talk to me?” Remus felt very awkward sitting in front of two women with incredibly powerful magic, it was oozing out of them, seeping into the air, thick like syrup.
“That's good to hear Remus. This is madam Pomphrey, she will be taking care of you regarding your health, not only around the fall moons. Your mother informs us that you have some history concerning your mental health. We want you to know that you have nothing to be ashamed of and you can come to us anytime of the day or night if needs be. Even during lessons, all of your teachers have been notified that you are allowed to leave lessons whenever you want without permission from whoever is teaching you. Is that understood?”
“Yes”, Remus said meekly, feeling his cheeks turn red. He hated when that incident was brought up. A couple of months ago Remus had found a bottle of his mum’s old pain medication she took after she had a minor surgery. In a moment of self hatred he had taken the whole bottle. It wasn’t enough to kill him but it gave his mum enough of a fright to not let him out of her sight for the remaining of the time he was at home before school started. He was lucky he convinced her to let him come here instead of a mental hospital.
“Now when concerning the fall moon i want you to report to the hospital wing straight after dinner, me and Pomphrey will lead you to where you will be transforming. I’ll be honest with you Remus it's not great in there but it's the best we can do.”
“That’s fine, my mum used to have to put me in a dog cage when I was first bitten because she didn’t know how to contain me, my dad refused to help.” Remus cut in, shrugging in nonchalance.
Pomphrey looked horrified, covering her mouth with her hand. “Well dear, I plan to make your transformations as comfortable as possible for you. I haven't ever treated anyone with your condition before, Remus, but I am doing lots of research. If you feel comfortable enough I would appreciate it if you could tell me about what moons are like some time. I understand that that is a vulnerable position to put yourself in though so don’t worry it makes you too uncomfortable. I would just like to learn how to best cartier for you”
Remus liked both of these women, which is good if they knew the most shameful things about him. He was glad they weren't going to belittle him for anything. “I might take you up on that offer sometime, thank you. Will that be all?”
“Yes Remus, that will be all.” Mcgonigal said, smiling at him. Remus made a move to stand. “Before you leave Remus I would like you to go and see Pomphrey every morning after you have eaten your breakfast, she has a new pill she would like to try, it may make that cloud you carry around a bit lighter.” Remus nodded in acknowledgement.
“I think there’s a Mr Potter waiting outside for you darling” Pomphrey chimed in as he made for the door.
James was, indeed, sitting outside. His back was against the wall. Once he saw Remus he rushed to scramble up off of the floor. “Hiya, what did she want to talk to you about?”
“Don’t take this the wrong way, James, but it's not really any of your business”
James nodded, “fair, I decided to come back for you so you knew where the entrance to the tower is and the password. You would have been stuck outside otherwise.”
“Thank you, that's very kind.” They walked in comfortable silence. The two boys stopped in front of a portrait of a fat woman wearing a white dress and a headband decorated in red and green grapes.
“That's the fat lady”, James said. “You tell her the password and she lets you into Gryffindor tower. Flying Pigs” the portrait swung open leading into a passage.
The boys walked down the passage. “What’s her name?” Remus asked.
“How am I supposed to know? I don’t think she has one.” James said dismissing his question.
“Of course she has a name, everyone does. What do we call her then?”
“I don’t know. Everyone calls her the fat lady”
“I think that's rather rude. I don’t think she would like everyone calling her that.” At this James just shrugged, moving on, up a flight of stairs. Remus was in a fowl mood now, James didn’t need to be so rude.
“You're in with us”, James said as he got to the end of the stairs and opened a door. The dorm was large with four, poster beds around the room. Peter was sitting on the one opposite the door, the bed next to his was clearly James’. It had quidditch things strewn around his area. On the walls, his bed and nightstand. Remus didn’t know anything about the famous game, but he knew James was a fanatic. The bed opposite James’, the one closer to the door, had the curtains drawn shut, obstructing the occupant from him. James could see Remus looking at the bed and mouthed Sirius’ name. Clearly not wanting to alert him that he was being talked about.
Remus went over to his bed on the third wall, furthest from the door, sandwiched between Sirius’ and James’ beds. He had a window to the left as well as a door about two meters from his bed that led to the bathroom. Remus took off his robe, laying it down on his bed, leaving him in just his school tie, shirt and trousers.
Remus made his way across the room back towards Sirius’ bed. “Sirius, are you ok?” No reply. “Can I come in?” No reply.
“It’s not worth it, mate. I’ve already tried.” James cut in.
Remus rolled his eyes obviously at James. He was annoying him, he was overly kind and accepting while being insufferable and ignorant at the same time. “I’m not your mate. Have you maybe considered that Sirius just didn’t want to see your annoying face?”
“Excuse you” James said, looking at Peter in disbelief. “Peter doesn’t find me annoying”
“Oh doesn’t he? How do you know if you always answer for him, hmm? I have known you both for hours now and I haven't heard him speak, not once. Whenever he is addressed you answer for him.” Remus hadn’t had a cigarette since the night before and it was making him angsty. He knew this and he probably wouldn’t have acted this way if he had but it felt too good watching the all so confident James squirm when his good nature was questioned. His left hand fingered the tin in his pocket again. He almost got it out to light one, the window was open and no teachers could see him. However he felt his new roommates wouldn’t appreciate it. James had looked so shocked earlier when he said ‘piss’ and after this row it would probably be his last straw. Sirius would probably find it cool though, Remus had noticed him subtly copying him.
Remus spun on his feet and poked his head inside Sirius’ bed. Sirius had his knees drawn up to his chest and his head buried in them, he looked up in surprise at Remus’ intrusion of his space. His eyes were red and puffy, he had been crying. Remus could see clearly in the dark of his bed. “Get out of bed, you’re coming on a walk with me. If you don’t come with me willingly, I’m dragging you. Got it?” Sirius nodded, getting out of bed. Remus grabbed a jumper, pulling it over his head before getting another out of his trunk and chucking it at Sirius. “you might get cold”
“How long will you be?” James asked. “It was curfew 10 minutes ago. You’ll get a detention”
Remus shrugged, swinging the door shut on his way out so it clicked. Sirius pulled on the jumper as they stood outside of the door, the jumper was huge on his small frame. Remus had stolen it from his older cousin about a year ago and it was one of his favorites. It was dark blue and incredibly soft inside. Reaching out to Sirius, Remus lifted the hood up over his face and rolled up the arms on the jumper so they weren't dangling down Sirius’ fingers anymore. Sirius smiled up at him in return. “Where are we going?” He asked Remus.
“I dunno,” Remus replied before heading down the stairs. They walked in an almost comfortable silence until they felt the cool freshnes of the outside air. As soon as Remus was outside he wiped out his tin and pulled out one of the pre-rolled cigarettes he made last night when he was too nervous to sleep. He placed it between his lips before retrieving his lighter, cupping his hand around the cigarette he stuck the lighter to light it. He took a long drag, feeling the thick smoke enter his lungs. He looked up at Sirius to gauge his reaction. Sirius was looking at him with his mouth slightly open in shock but his eyes shone with aw.
Remus extended his hand out to him, the one with the cigarette between his two fingers. Raising his eyebrows in a silent question. Sirius shook his head violently. “How long have you smoked for?” he asked, tilting his head, in a very dogish way, Remus thought to himself.
“Couple of months” Remus shot Sirius a cheeky smile. “It’s fun having something to hide from my parents” they started walking again.
Remus finished his cigarette and immediately lit another one. They didn’t talk. After a while Sirius chimed in, “aren’t you going to ask what’s wrong with me?”
“No. if you want to talk about it, you can. But I'm not going to nosy into your private life.” Remus stated this matter of factly.
“I don’t”
They walked in silence for another ten minutes, in this time Remus had 2 more cigarettes. They stopped at a willow tree close to the black lake, they took a seat under the vines, close to the trunk. Sirius was sitting very close to him, his head rested on Remus’ shoulder.
“Five hundred.”
“Hmm, what?” Remus was brought out of his nicotine fogged brain at Sirius’ words.
“Five hundred years”, Sirius lifted his head and looked up at Remus through his eyelashes, “that’s how long everyone in my family have been going to Hogwarts. Do you want to know how many of those were not sorted into Slytherin?”
“Yeah, go on then, how many?”
“Three, and they were kicked out of the family for it, burnt off the tapestry. I’m scared Remus, what if they do that to me, my little brother will be all alone with them. They’re awful, no one will be around to protect him.
“That won't happen Sirius.” Remus wanted to ask what he meant by burning them off the tapestry but it didn't feel like the right time. Sirius had laid his head back on his shoulder, he could feel it getting wet as he started to cry again. Remus resolved to ignore his tears so he didn’t have to deal with the job of comforting him. It was shitty, Remus knew this.
“How do you know?” Sirius sniffed.
“Because you seem like you care about your brother too much to let that happen.”
They made their way back to the dorm, having to sneak past Filch who was roaming the halls.
They crept into the dark dorm, the snores of both of their roommates, signaled them both to be asleep. Sirius grabbed some pajamas and started changing by his bed, whereas Remus got out his own to change in the bathroom and brush his teeth. Just as he got to the door, Sirius’ whispered voice called him back.
“Hey Re? ... Thank you”
“Anytime”, Although Remus wasn’t entirely sure why Sirius was thanking him.
The next morning Remus apologized to James saying that he was sorry he acted that way, he was tired and overwhelmed and he took out those negative emotions on him. It was something his mum always made him do when he got in arguments. Explain why it happened but not push the blame away from him.
James had accepted his apology and explained that Peter gets incredibly shy around new people, once he had time to warm up to everyone he would start talking again. James answers for him so that Peter doesn't get stuck in sticky situations. They had been doing this since reception, when they met on the first day of primary school. James admitted that he had no idea talking for Peter came across as overbearing.
All four of them made their way down to breakfast together. Peter sat next to Remus with their backs to the slytherin table whereas James and Sirius sat opposite them. Sirius took the space directly in front of Him, he gave a small smile. James chatted along to Peter from his seat opposite, not caring much about the lack of response. Remus rolled his eyes fondly at Sirius who stifled a giggle.
Remus wasn’t sure how to get away to the hospital wing without the other boys following him. He liked them well enough, they seemed solid. That didn’t mean he wanted them to know everything about him. Remus thought of just not going, he wasn’t going to take the pills anyway, but that would just kick up more of a fuss in the long run. He had to go.
What are your plans today, before lessons start next week?” He asked them to see if he could sneak away to the hospital wing.
“Me and Peter were going to go up to the quidditch pitch and see if they’ll let us fly for a bit. Want to come?” James asked, looking towards Sirius than him so that they knew they were both invited.
“Yeah, sounds good.” Sirius replied. Fantastic Remus though, while they were there he could sneak off to see madam Pomphrey.
“Nah, I'm good. Flying isn’t really my thing. I think I'll go on a walk, get my bearings of this place. It's huge. I’ll see you around yeah?
Remus pulled out his map and made his way down to the hospital wing, stopping briefly at the door before pushing it open and making his way inside. There were rows of cots down each side of the room with curtains that could be drawn shut for privacy. There was one person in there besides him, the ginger boy who was called up first for the sorting ceremony. He sat crossed legged on top of a cot in blue and white pajamas.
“Are you ok?” Remus asked, making his way over to him. The boy nodded. “Do you know where Pomphrey is? She’s expecting to see me.”
“Dumbledoor came in about 10 minutes ago, she left in quite the hurry after him. Said she wouldn’t be long and i was to wait until she gets back”
“OK, do you mind if I sit with you while I wait for her?” the boy nodded so Remus took a seat on the chair next to the bed, set out for visitors. “I’m Remus by the way.”
“Hello Remus, i’m Charlie” Charlie had a very soft voice, like it was floating on a cloud.
They started chatting about their home life and friends they left behind. Remus learned that Charlie came from a catholic family from Canterbury, he was a Muggle born with elderly parents. He didn’t have any siblings so he spent a lot of time around his best friend's house up the street to occupy his time. His parents were ready to call a priest for an exorcism when he first got his letter, they had both laughed at this.
Remus told him about his mum's obsession with gardening and the silly boy he was friends with who lived in a flat around the corner from him. He told Charlie of his sister, Celest, who would be turning 7 soon. When asked if she would be joining Hogwarts Remus shook his head, she had never shown any signs of magic.
Madam Pomphrey re-entered the hospital wing about half an hour after Remus had.
“Ah, good, Remus you're here, I see you’ve met charlie. You’re both here for the same thing” She made her way over to a cupboard and waved her want to unlock it. The spell was strong, Remus could feel it, it wouldn’t be easily broken. Pomphrey uncapped a pill bottle and put two each in two paper cups. She handed a cup to each boy then passed them a jug of water and two more classes. Remus knocked the tablets into his mouth and poured some water in both glasses, handing one to Charlie before taking a swig of his own to help swallow the pills. Charlie took his shortly after.
Remus waited for Charlie to get dressed (he had learned that he had stayed there last night following a panic attack). Pomphrey checked both of their mouths to make sure that they swallowed the tablets before letting them go.
They both walked straight out of the corridor and onto the grounds. It was still warm outside but there was a cool September breeze blowing. As soon as they were far enough away from the hospital wing, Remus spat out the pills, from where he was hiding them in his mouth, into his hand and flung them into a nearby bush. Charlie let out a burst of laughter before doing the same.
“Great minds think alike”, he said to Remus, raising both eyebrows. They made a silent decision not to talk about why they were both taking the same medication, or why they both spat them out. They did however agree to meet tomorrow morning and go together for their next dose.