Regulus stood silently in the doorway of their family home, watching as Sirius prepared to leave. His eyes were fixed on Sirius, who was packing a small bag, preparing to embark on a journey that would forever change their lives. The air in the room felt thick with tension as if the weight of their shared existence had settled upon their shoulders. His heart clenched with a mixture of longing and fear, knowing that once Sirius walked out that door, their lives would never be the same again. He couldn't bear the thought of being left behind, abandoned in this house of darkness and cruelty. Yet, a part of him felt paralyzed, trapped in the suffocating grip of their family's twisted expectations.
Today, Sirius was leaving the house, leaving behind their horrid mother, aloof and uninvolved father, and leaving behind Regulus. Leaving him alone to fend for himself in front of the abusers that were part of their family. Regulus could still remember the countless nights spent huddled together, seeking solace in their shared misery. But now, Sirius was making a break for freedom, leaving Regulus to face their demons alone.
Their mother, that horrid woman, the embodiment of coldness and disdain, paid them no mind, her attention consumed by her self-absorbed pursuits. The only times she decided to look their way was when she wanted to punish them for being unfit for being considered part of the noble and amazing Black family. Their father, a mere shadow of a man, wandered through the house like a ghost, detached and uninvolved. That coward of a man, hiding behind his wife and looking with vague interest when his sons were punished, looking in fear, but never enough to take action and stop the torture that was called discipline. In this house, love was a foreign concept, a distant memory that had long since faded away.
Their mother wasn’t home, and maybe their father was, but as always, he wouldn’t say a word or appear close to their rooms. Always afraid of getting to know his sons, of seeing how similar or different to him they were.
Sirius turned to face Regulus, a mixture of determination and desperation carved upon his features. "Reg, please," he pleaded, his voice tinged with urgency. "Come with me. We can escape this place, this life. We don't have to let them define us. We can make our destiny."
Regulus looked into his older brother's eyes, the same eyes that had always been filled with resolve and defiance. They were the eyes of a rebel, a warrior who refused to submit to the darkness that surrounded them. But as much as Regulus yearned for that same strength, he couldn't find it within himself.
As the younger Black watched his brother, he felt his heart divided between the desire for freedom and the crippling fear that had been instilled in him from an early age. The idea of leaving everything behind, and embarking into the unknown, sent shivers down his spine. He was accustomed to the darkness that surrounded their lives, even though it suffocated him, even though sometimes he thought he was going to die in the middle of the darkness without being able to breathe.
"I can't, Sirius," Regulus whispered, his voice barely audible. "I'm not like you. I'm not strong enough to leave everything behind."
Sirius' face fell, a mix of frustration and sorrow crossing his features. He took a step closer, his hand reaching out as if to bridge the ever-widening gap between them. "Reg, don't say that," he implored, his voice filled with aching tenderness. "You are strong. I've seen it. You have a fire within you, a spirit that refuses to be extinguished. We don't have to stay here and endure this. We can find a way together. I know James would take us in without a doubt, his parents would love you Reg… Come with me."
Regulus shook his head, tears welling up in his eyes. He felt trapped, suffocated by the weight of their family's expectations. Each moment in this bloody house was like torture, a weird type of punishment created only for him, but still, he wasn’t sure of how he would live outside this place.
"I'm not like you, Sirius," he repeated, his voice quivering with vulnerability. "I'm weak, and I'm scared. I don't know if I can survive on my own. I don't know if I can face their wrath."
Sirius' eyes softened, and he pulled Regulus into a tight embrace. The warmth of his brother's arms enveloped him, providing a fleeting sense of security amidst the storm. "You're not weak, Reg," Sirius whispered, his voice choked with emotion. "You're my brother, and I love you. No matter what happens, always remember that."
Regulus clung to Sirius, his tears soaking into his brother's shoulder. He wanted to believe in Sirius' words, to find the strength to break free from their family's toxic grip. But the chains that bound him were forged from years of conditioning, the weight of tradition and expectation too heavy to bear.
At that moment, Regulus knew that he was making a choice. By not taking action, by not running away, he was picking a side. Even if he didn’t want to. This would probably be the choice that would condemn him to a life of darkness. He would stay behind, sacrificing his happiness and freedom to protect those he loved. It was a tragic decision, a heartbreaking sacrifice made in the name of love. After all, he knew, he knew that if Sirius and him ran away, their parents would search for them. Losing a kid wasn’t as tragic as losing both heirs to the family. He knew that in his fear, in his cowardly actions, he was also protecting his brother.
As Sirius finally pulled away, Regulus saw the anguish in his brother's eyes, the pain of leaving him behind. It mirrored his own, a shared burden of shattered dreams and lost innocence. "I'll never stop fighting for you, Reg," Sirius whispered, his voice filled with determination and sorrow. "I promise, I'll find a way back to you."
Regulus nodded, his shaky voice barely above a whisper. "I'll be waiting," he said, his words heavy with the weight of unspoken fears and unshed tears. He was going to wait a bit more until his parents would go away or find themselves ready to give up on the idea of the perfect heir. He was going to wait until Sirius could come back for him and then… Then he would run away with his big brother. Away from all the madness of this awful house.
Sirius nodded one last time, leaning against Regulus and leaving a soft kiss on his little brother’s forehead… with that, the older brother Black turned and, grabbing his small bag with the most important belongings, walked away, disappearing into the night, leaving Regulus behind in a world that would never be the same. Regulus stood there, watching the door close, a profound sense of loneliness settling deep within his soul.
Regulus stayed behind, he looked at how the silhouette of his brother disappeared in the night until he couldn’t see it anymore and he would stay put. Waiting for the man that had been his protector and hero for so many years. He would carry the weight of his decision, sure… the ache of his lost chance at freedom with the only living family that truly loved him... But he would also have hope, he would keep believing that one day, somehow, his big brother would appear and pull him away from the claws of the darkness, that Sirius would stop him from drowning under the weight of the family expectations… and that one day, they would be reunited. Until then, he would endure, he would wait, and from time to time, he would hide in his brother’s bedroom, pretending to be a little kid once again, watching the gorgeous constellations and remembering Sirius’ voice talking and explaining each one with a soothing voice.
Even in his last moments, Regulus would remember his brother’s words, the soothing voice that would work as a lullaby as he exhaled his last breath.