Chapter 4
If you ask Harry when was the moment he caught feelings for Draco Malfoy, he would much rather fight the Dark Lord again than answer that question. He doesn’t actually know the answer to that himself let alone say it out loud clear and for the one who asked to hear. But one day it just happened, it happened and once it had started Potter knew there was no going back only from the way his heart started to speed up against his chest
One day he was eleven years old, looking up at Malfoy who offered his friendship which he denied as if he was made to sign a contract with the devil, not shake hand with a innocent little blonde boy. Then he was walking around in the woods with him, rolling his eyes whenever Draco would grab onto his elbow because he stepped on a dry branch-it was their first encounter. Harry was eleven years old, already making an enemy who he had yet to facs
One day he was twelve years old, dueling Malfoy in Quidditch and classes as if he was getting paid for it, he was twelve years old and already part of an enmity that others do not see in a lifetime. Adrenaline, energy, enthusiasm, compulsion, emotion-Harry was aware what all of those were, felt them on his body and more, all because of Draco Malfoy, who was the first one to get under his skin
One day he was thirteen, throwing daggers with his stare at Malfoy who was making fun of him for passing out on the train to Hogwarts, he saw the glimpse of worry in Draco’s eyes but it faded away the moment he opened his mouth. Later he was trying to stop his heart from beating loud and tremulously as the Slytherin was approaching him with easy steps, later on he was checking to see if Malfoy is alright in the Hospital Wing. They were enemies yet for some reason he couldn’t help but be worried. And a while after he was laughing at the blonde figure as he got punched by Hermione straight in the face. It was a wild year-it was a year after which Harry spent days wishing his stomach wouldn’t flip whenever he remembered Draco’s face
One day he was fourteen laughing at Malfoy who got turned into a ferret, of course there were a lot of other thoughts in his mind with the tournament going on but still competing against Cedrid, Krum and Fleur didn’t make his heart beat in the way it did when he was competing against Draco. It was simply the year when Harry had realised something about his ‘arch enemy’, something which had yet to change his life forever without him even knowing it
Among the so many things that happened that year, one above all was far more than clear, he was feeling something for Malfoy, something other than hatred, it was a powerful feeling. He was only fourteen so it was hard to tell what exactly it was, he was a child and he couldn’t figure it out properly at the time
One day he was fifteen, Harry was too busy during that year, he had no time to fight with Malfoy as he did before, his mind was in too much of a fog however even if they were fairly strangers the scarhead boy couldn’t help but hope that Draco would be on their side, that there is a slight little chance. He was somewaht drawn to the boy, believing that secretly, somewhere behind the mean comments, the evil smile, the harsh sarcastic laughs, the wicked behaviour, the dark mask he puts on, somewhere behind them all Draco just wants to be good, just wants to help but can’t. Harry was fifteen with more worries on his mind than most adults, but he was also a teenager who couldn’t stop about the boy who got him in a chokehold ever since the first day. It was a wonder he desperately wanted the answer to, needed it
One day he was sixteen, Harry got a hold of his feelings, he didn’t accept them, didn’t want to yet so he put them behind and tried to forget about them. Draco was a Death Eater, he had no proof, no evidence however he just felt it, felt that something is not right as it was in the years before. Many may not have noticed but everything about the boy changed, besides the fact that he got taller and stronger physically, Malfoy’s aura got ten times darker, Potter felt a cold air stabbing his heart whenever he would look at the blonde because he knew something wrong. It was something he once again needed the answer to. He did not mean to hurt Draco, he did not know what that spell meant but he did not hesitate to say it, Harry didn’t mean to harm the Slytherin as he did. He stayed up after for days crying wishing to apologise, wishing he has mistaken and Draco is not actually on the evil side. He was sixteen, falling in love with the one who hated him all along, the one he hates. In love with the one who is on the other side of the story
One day he was seventeen, after so many things he went through with his friends, Harry somehow ended up once again facing Draco Malfoy. And Draco knew it was him, Potter could see it in the boy’s gray eyes that he knew it was Harry, yet the moment he didn’t say anything made Harry’s heart jump. It was a load of Courage Malfoy showed that day. It was a day who marked something. One day he was seventeen, catching the wand Draco threw at him after Voldemort announced his death, and he didn’t just catch the piece of wood in between his fingers
Harry Potter was the most important part of Draco Malfoy’s redemption
One day he was seventeen, saving the world and falling in love deeper than ever
And now he is eighteen years old, waiting for Draco at midnight two nights before Christmas, alone in the common room of the dorms made for those who came to repeat the year. Harry is pretty much still in love, pretty much still feels butterflies and he can not believe that not just two weeks he found out.
Found out all these years ago that Draco was in love with him too
“Potter you alright?”
The sudden sharp voice snaps Harry out of his thoughts, he looks up and his breath catches in his throat.
He himself has changed over the summer, Harry got taller and definitely gotten bigger physically, gained all the muscles he once wanted to have so he wouldn’t seem as defenceless, he let his hair grow and took care of himself better than before during his recovery after the war, it is noticeable, one can not miss it. But Draco? Draco looks like a total different person but yet the same
His hair looks like it did in their third year at Hogwarts, it’s middle parted but somehow much longer definitely looks like it could be put in a small tail, his arms have gotten bigger, just like Harry he seems to be much stronger than before but unlike the Gryffindor boy, Malfoy’s body it’s still slim. He is fresh out of the shower with drops of water visible through his white shirt that’s clinging onto his chest and fragile waist, he is wearing a pair of grey sweatpants which hang again low his waist showing the band of his boxers
The scars Harry gave him can be seen through the shirt but they look soft and all that he wants to do is kiss his way through them and make them go away because he hates himself for it, the dark mark it’s still there but it has faded a little it is not just as black, it’s covered by little cuts which seem to be old hence they are quite white and not red nonetheless they look beautiful and Harry can’t find himself seeing the mark as something evil because it was done against Draco’s will, it was forced onto his pale white skin. It’s there proving how strong the Slytherin actually is, it’s a compliment.
Right when Harry remembers to blink and tries to answer, Draco pulls from his wrist a tie then guides it to his lips where he holds it for a moment and lifts up both his arms catching his hair in a slight bun with it leaving two strands of it in front, his t-shirt raises up exposing his skin and Harry is salivating at this point. He can’t find proper words to speak
“Potter you’re very red you sure you ok? You getting sick?” Draco comes to sit next to Harry on the couch a slight frown on his face
Harry just shakes his head and pulls on the hem of his black shirt because he started sweating the moment Malfoy got close to him, he clears his throat then starts talking
“I am alright don’t worry, it’s just really warm in here. They be really warming up the school when it’s a storm outside”
“Yeah it really is ugly outside” Draco glances at the window frowining at the horrible snow storm that is going on outside “But at least in here it’s warm and nice” He shruggs
“Why were you so lost in thoughts Potter?”
“Nothing much honestly” Harry tries to hide his blush once again “Was just thinking about Christmas” That was a quick lie
“Do you not like Christmas?” Draco questions, he looks at Harry curiously pouting his lips slightly barely visible
“It’s not that I don’t like it per say but I don’t think I ever actually had a proper one until few years ago when I spent it with Ron and the Weasleys” Potter starts to explain “I used to stay with my aunt and uncle before you know? And they didn’t exactly offered me the best memories”
Draco just nods even tho he didn’t know it, his eyes wait for Harry to go on with the story
“They didn’t like me very much for that I am a wizard, or maybe they just hated me for no reason and because of that I didn’t have the happiest Christmases with them. My uncle would lock me under the stairs where my room was thinking I am gonna steal my cousin’s presents in the Christmas morning, it was only my aunt who came from time to time to give me cookies that made it feel better. But I wasn’t that upset because I could spend a full day surrounded by some old Christmas lights and draw while eating sweets”
By the time Harry finishes talking he can see Draco’s expression has turned into a very sorrow one, his eyes are a bit watery but briefly and he gulps after taking a deep breath. Harry shakes his head thinking that he over shared a few details but he can’t bring himself to regret that
“That’s horrible” Malfoy suddenly says “They’re horrible people for doing that I don’t know what to say….”
“You don’t need to say anything Malfoy” Harry smiles “It’s alright I don’t care, it’s in the past and that’s it, glad I am out of there now, what about you? Do you like Christmas?” he quickly changes the subject
“A little” Draco looks at Harry with intensity “I do not think I have actually spent Christmas for that matter, my father he uhh used to say that having a decorated tree would ruin the look of the house so we almost never had one, probably only did when I was a child and my mom used to argue over it to make me happy. He also used to say that presents are useless, that if I want something just ask for it and don’t make a fuss about it. But again mom used to buy me little things and presents, leave them under my pillow you know and every Christmas morning during breakfast she would wink then smile at me. It made everything feel better”
Harry can see the warmth in Draco’s eyes as he talks about his mother, the way she kept him happy and protected despite his father prejudice. Draco’s smile is unexplainably beautiful and brighter than the moon itself, his lips curve up while a hint of blush reaches his cheeks. He then bites his bottom lip as Potter can’t look away
“Sorry for rambling on” Draco murmurs “Hot distracted into the story. But to answer your question, I guess I like Christmas, I don’t only have bad memories about it”
“You miss your mom” Harry states, he doesn’t even realises what he just said until Draco’s eyes widen as he looks at the brunette boy, he clears his throat akwardly
“I-uh I noticed you started smiling when you brought her up, and you really seem to love the memories you told me about so I just assumed-“
“You’re right Potter stop freaking out” Malfoy smirks then rolls his eyes, he tags one of the strands which was covering his face behind his ear “I do miss her, she is my mom after all. Did her best to protect me. Always. Before, during and after the war. I own her everything, she made me what I am”
Hearing Draco say that makes him remember something
“I never got to thank your mother for what she did” Harry whispers under his breath “Did she tell you?”
“Tell me what?” Draco shifts closer to Harry as their knees bump, he rests his elbow on the back of the couch watching the boy curiously
“In the woods, during the war, the last night before Voldemort announced my…well my death. He did curse me. But I didn’t die, I have no idea how but I didn’t. Your mother, she was the one who came to check if I am actually dead and when she saw that I wasn’t she asked me about you-“
“What?!” Draco exclaims “I didn’t knew that!”
“Let me finish drama queen” Harry smiles “She asked if you’re alive, I only nodded then she claimed me to Voldemort as dead. She defined knew that he would bring me back to the castle to gloat, she didn’t care about me but I soon realised I was her only way to get back to Hogwarts, to where you were, and get you safely without that dark lord bastard noticing. Nonetheless what she did was very brave, without her I probably wouldn’t be here now. I owe her more than a lot”
“I had no idea” Draco’s voice is tremulous, his eyes hold an expression that can only be described as compassion, admiration, wonder “I don’t know why she never told me”
“But I told you now” Harry says in a low tone “And when you go home, please don’t forget to thank her for everything she did”
Draco smiles faintly, he looks at Harry intensely, their faces are closer then they have ever been. Draco’s eyes sparkle under the dull lights of a Christmas tree. He finds himself leaning in wishing to absorb the love in them with his own stare, kiss the breath away from Draco’s lips.
He needs it, he knows he can, he knows Draco loves him, it was all clear in the notebook. But he feels as if he can’t, Harry only inhales sharply and backs away just as Draco closes his eyes, shaking his head the moment he feels the Gryffindor boy further away
“You said..” Harry starts saying with a frown “You said your mom used to get you little presents, what does little presents mean?”
It’s a stupid question really, it doesn’t clear the tension in between them, it’s still there thick in the air
“A ring” Draco answers “Not just rings, but necklaces, silver pencils, earrings, even tho I could never wear them because my dad never knew I got my ears pierced. I always had a passion for silver, for jewellery and expensive stones especially emerald diamonds….”
Harry’s breath stops once again, but he doesn’t get to say a word, Draco stops him
“But there was this ring she gave me when I was fourteen. It was made of gold but it was painted in black, instead of being formed round and simple like a normal ring, it was shaped in the form of a slithering snake and its tail met its eyes, which were again made of green diamonds. I haven’t stopped wearing it since then until the war, I placed it in a box with all the other jewelleries she gave to me. So I wouldn’t lose it”
“That’s…that’s surprising. I never took you as the jewellery type of person” Harry’s tone is inexplicably soft.
It’s probably the image of Draco with earrings and right and necklaces. And sliver jewellery all over his body that makes him unable to speak
“Yes I actually am Potter, surprisingly…actually wait a second” Draco gets up to grab his wand from where he left it on the table
“Accio jewellery”
Right as he spelled the words, a black box made of wood came flying in the air from his dorm, he caught it then sit back down next to Harry
“This is it” Draco whispers “Do you wanna see them?”
“Sure”
Draco bites his bottom lip in excitement, he presses on the top of the box twice with his finger and then it opens revealing a set of beautiful black and silver earrings, some simple, some shaped in the form of snakes, some shaped in the form of stars. Then from the sides of it come out a few little drawers full of black, gold, silver and green earrings of all sorts. They look so beautiful and neatly arranged it takes your breath away in an instant. And the last compartment that opens is a drawer which holds two chains, a silver one at the end of which Draco's initials are located and another also silver but brighter at the end of which there is again a black snake. A pattern which often repeats itself in between Draco’s collection
“They’re beautiful” He exhales watching closely “Why do you never wear them?”
“I-“ Draco begins to say as if he has a clear explanation, then he frowns confused
“I actually don’t know. I was used to keeping them in this box hidden so my father wouldn’t see them but I’ve got no reason to do that now..”
His finger glaze gently over a pair of beautiful black earrings, small and black, the snake pattern present again. He shakily reaches towards them and with quivering hands he picks one up
“It’s been a while since I wore earrings” Draco whispers, more for himself
“No one is stopping you” Harry gulps eagerly “Ain’t nobody judging you here” he points around the room making it clear that it’s empty
That it’s just the two of them there
And Draco does it, he brings the earring up to his ear and hisses at the contact when he puts it in his ear. After he let’s go of it, his stare catches Harry. Boy who forgot what his name is at this point
Draco looks so beautiful with earrings, accentuate his face and pale skin, the dark colour compliments his pale complex and bright eyes. His bun still looks perfect and the strands of hair do wonders
Harry has no idea what to say, he just looks at the blonde boy unable to speak as his heart begins to pound crazily against his chest
“How does it look?”
Draco is talking about the earring
“Beautiful. It looks beautiful”
Harry is talking about Draco
****
And later that night there is only one thing in Harry’s mind
He is going to get Draco a Christmas present. It’s gonna be as beautiful as the Slytherin himself