Gossip
Narcissa found him first.
Regulus was just opposite Hogshead, leaning against the front of a bookstore and smoking a cigarette, hours after the band’s performance. He had finally escaped from meeting people and as much as he loved and was thankful for his fans, they overwhelmed him sometimes.
“He looked furious yet sad.” Cissa hummed as she leaned next to him. Holding out her hand for her own cigarette, Regulus pulled one out of his pocket and lit it. “Though the former could just be because I walked past him and winked.”
Regulus snorted in an undignified manner. Oh how his mother would be appalled if she saw him now, clad in dark fitted trousers and unbuttoned shirt showcasing scattered tattoos. Though he must admit his curls were styled to perfection, the only rebellion he wouldn’t allow. Perhaps she was already rolling in her newly dug grave. Tilting his head to face Cissa he smirked, “Must you live for the drama?”
Narcissa grinned in response, her expression so open and freeing that he had to send a quick silent prayer to whatever God helped them get out of that family and the forced marriages that came with that title. “You say that like you’re not the same. We are cut from the same cloth after all.”
“Ah, touché.”
“I truly am sorry though.” Cissa’s smile turned sad as she glanced at him. “I should’ve come around more often or at least tried to intervene when they’d go off. I should’ve at least tried to get father to have dinners over at yours more or maybe ask mother if–”
Regulus cut her off before she could spiral, “That wouldn’t have done shit but get us broken bones Cissy, you know that. We all did our best to survive in that family. I don’t blame you for trying to look after yourself. I don’t blame Andy for leaving and I don’t blame Bella for running soon after.”
“I know. I know. It just aches when I hear you sing about it. In a good way at least. It’s bittersweet yet refreshing and when you sing it the way you do, I feel seen. I FaceTimed Andy and actually got ahold of Bella tonight. They cried Reg.” Cissa cleared her throat and glanced up to the sky, pulling her coat tightly around her. Winter was nearing rapidly it seemed.
“I'm sorry.” Regulus whispered as he pulled out two other cigarettes.
“No, no. Don’t be. They loved it. Hell, Bella even smiled and said to give you a kiss. She wants to see us sometime. She misses us but won’t step foot in England and Scotland’s too close. I invited them to spend Christmas and New Years with us in Italy. I hope you don’t mind.”
He smiled at that. Regulus knew Bellatrix had taken to traveling the world as a hotel connoisseur, never staying in one place for too long. She wrote them monthly and rarely answered calls as she claimed to be an old soul not meant for technology.
“You ask as if you won’t just show up anyways. You do know that you have a house in Italy too right? The one you bought with Alice years ago?”
Narcissa pouted and went to retort when they heard a voice clearing. “I hope we’re not interrupting.”
Both instantly froze. Of course speaking about Cissa’s sisters would make his own estranged brother appear.
“You are.” Regulus and Cissa deadpanned before looking to eachother and bursting out laughing, quite hysterically Regulus noticed. If it was one thing they developed from their trauma, it was laughing in the most inopportune moments.
Sobering up fairly quickly, Regulus forcefully relaxed against the building, holding onto a still chuckling Narcissa who’s tipsiness seemed to hit her again. Glancing across from them, he noticed Sirius watching the
exchange quite blankly. Remus and Peter were a few steps behind looking sheepish and James was standing in the middle of the two, staring at Regulus unabashedly.
Now Regulus has been with a good share of men in his life and would consider himself quite picky when it came to his lovers. That being said, as Regulus gazed at James Potter he couldn’t find it in himself to see the man as anything but the son of Apollo in his white shirt and brown slacks. He always acquainted the man with the Greek Gods and legends, he used to think himself Icarus and James his Sun. Look where that got him in the end, the Sun spared no man no matter the profound love you gave him. The Sun couldn’t be smothered by the dark.
Gods Regulus was pathetic. Here was his brother standing in front of him after all these years of silence and all Regulus could think about in that moment was fucking James Potter’s tanned skin.
Regulus clenched his jaw and averted his eyes to Sirius, taking the older boy in. His hair was longer though he wore the same amount of leather now than he did at seventeen. Flicking the cigarette butt onto the ground in front of him, he mashed it just as Sirius began speaking. “I need to talk to you.”
“It’s getting late and as much as I’d love to–“ Regulus began but was cut off by Sirius who pleaded with him.
“Reg I…please just for a moment.”
Narcissa squeezed his hand making him glance at her. They always had a way when they were little to communicate by the eyes. It was something only they could do as the younger siblings, hell at Hogwarts some people used to think they were twins the way they communicated. At this moment he knew that Cissa didn’t approve but that she knew his choice the moment he looked back.
As much as she knew Regulus disliked his brother, he didn’t hate him. Oh no, he was something worse than that. He feared him as much as he loved him. Someone apart of your life for so long leaving you in an abusive household without a word or trace really fucks up the mind. So yes, while she knew Regulus didn’t hate him, she knew that he feared his brother’s presence or lack of it in their lives.
With a sigh Narcissa regained what she liked to call her ‘posh bitch attitude’ and turned her nose up at the men in front of her. “I’ll get the others and be right across the road with my wife. We’ll make sure no one disturbs you. And Sirius?”
Narcissa looked up at the man and sneered, “I’d be very careful of what you say tonight. You and my sister are close but not closer than she and I. Her daughter loves lionheart here more than most. Step out of line Sirius Black and the only blood family you’ll have left will be the ones long buried.”
With that Narcissa squeezed Regulus’ hand one last time before sauntering back over to Hogshead where Regulus could see Barty and Evan already there, eyes cast firmly on them.
“Lionheart?” James was the one to break the lingering silence. He was never one to be quiet for long.
“None of your fucking business.”
“Nice to see you too, Reggie” James smiled tightly.
Regulus’ jaw ticked as he heard the nickname, fists clenched and nails digging into his skin. Unlocking his jaw Regulus harshly spoke, “Do not call me that. Ever. Now one of you wanted to talk, so talk. You have ten minutes and after that I’d greatly wish to never see any of you again.”
James went to protest but Remus put his hand on his shoulder to halt him. Regulus was not in the mood.
“Those songs…” Sirius began but trailed off not knowing how to start a conversation with a brother he felt like he no longer knew.
“Those songs were beautiful.” Remus saved as he came to rest against the wall with Regulus. “Different from the ones you usually perform but nevertheless amazing.”
Regulus hummed and offered the man a cigarette. It was his seventh one of the night but fuck it, if he was being forced to have a civil conversation with his brother and friends for a night then he’d need it. Especially as it seems like they weren’t going to approach any of the heavy and many topics that needed to be discussed. Ah well, here’s to hoping to never cross paths again, but of course Regulus couldn’t get everything he wanted.
“Coming from Mr….ah what did that woman call it? Ah yes, Mr. Remus ‘Poetry runs in his veins’ Lupin. That’s a rather large compliment.” Regulus snorted as he heard Remus burst out laughing.
“You haven’t changed, have you Reg?” Peter joined in as he too snickered, remembering that interview.
“Hmmm, some might say that. Though, those who stayed with me long enough says different.” Regulus lazily smirked at the blond boy, offering him a cigarette before pushing the pack in his back pocket. He could see Sirius bristle at the jibe.
“What do they say?” James hesitantly chimed in soon after, asking the question that all of them seemed to want the answer to as they leaned closer to him.
Regulus hummed facing the sky. The stars were out and bright that night, the crescent moon waning. His eyes then shifted to James as he spoke, “They say I’m the same Regulus as I always was, just free now. Aberforth, the man who owns Hogshead, says that I’m simply the boy who fights until his hands bleed, then writes with stained fingers.”
Who do you think I am? Regulus wanted to ask the bespectacled boy. Who am I to you now if anything? He itched to ask Sirius. Why did you leave when we were so close? He wanted to know why he was so dispensable to them. But of course he’d never ask them that. Not there where James looked frustrated and confused. Not then when Sirius's anger seemed to come back. And especially not when Remus and Peter looked at eachother as if they had more pieces of a complicated puzzle.
“Why?” Sirius questioned jaw clenched almost painfully as if he was bracing himself for the response he was going to receive.
Regulus was confused, so many things ran through his head as he pondered the question, “Why what Sirius?”
“The songs? I’ve heard people in there talking, they aren’t your usual are they. Why sing them now? Was it because you wanted me to hear them? Feel sorry for you? Is that what it is? Fuck Walburga was right wasn’t she? When she told me you’d do anything for attention, no wonder you whore yourself out to that Crouch and the Rosier’s–”
Everyone was too stunned by Sirius’ words to register Regulus clocking Sirius in the face then proceeded to knock him over and continue his assault.
“Don’t you ever fucking say their names–“
Crack. Sirius nose broke.
“You fucking son of a bitch!”
Sirius tried to fight back but Regulus effectively pinned his arms under him.
“Get off me!” Regulus tried to get out of the hands that pulled him away from Sirius. “That fucking cunt deserves it!”
“Calm down Regulus, Please, just STOP FIGHTING ME!” James yelled as he tightened his grip around Regulus, one hand around his waist and the other across his chest.
Regulus tensed as he realized who grabbed him. He was fucking seething as he watched Remus and Peter pick Sirius up off of the pavement. Regulus did a good job at smashing his nose and splitting the boys lip. Hell, even he could see that Sirius’ eyes would be black and blue by the morning.
“Get your fucking hands off my brother before I slice them off Potter.” Barty gritted as he and the others staked over. Suddenly Regulus was released and pulled into multiple embrace.
“You slimy little–” Sirius began but stopped as he coughed out blood.
Untangling himself from his friends, regulus marched over until he was directly in front of Sirius, holding out his hands in peace as Remus tried to shield his boyfriend.
“I don’t give a fuck about you and what you think of me but let me tell you something Sirius Black. Those people…” Regulus pointed to Pandora, Barty, Evan and Narcissa and Alice he’ll even Aberforth who were all standing behind him and continued “…are my family. You know what that means right? They never left in the middle of the night and ran away from their problems.”
Regulus leaned in to look in his brother's eyes that grew glacial as he scowled. “ I don’t know when you started listening to Walburga brother dearest but if you haven’t noticed before let me enlighten you. That woman was a fucking abusive liar and if you ever believed a word from her mouth then you’re just as bad as the rest of the family you tried to desperately to renounce. Now I suggest you go back to your tattoo studio, let your boyfriend continue his shows and Peter be his highly requested photographer and go play brother to the London Times best selling author.”
Regulus chuckled mirthlessly as he watched surprise paint Sirius’ rapidly swelling features, “ You didn’t think I knew that did you? Unlike you I don’t leave those I consider family behind. Familia ante omnia and all that, but hey, I was just another obstacle in your way to being a Potter, am I right?.”
With those last words Regulus turned and for the first time, he was the one to walk away.
—
Regulus gazed up at the sky as dawn broke through the clouds. He sat outside on the hotel’s balcony, legs propped up on the coffee table crossed by the knees. He had his old tattered journal opened on his lap, a pencil stuck behind his right ear.
Barty was the first one to join him with a tin of biscuits in hand. Pandora and Evan soon followed, bringing all of them coffee. They munched on the biscuits for a while watching as the sun rose and the sky lightened.
Pandora was the first to break the silence as she gently grasped Regulus’ hands in her own and examined them. “They aren’t bad, just a bit bruised but they’ll heal.”
He hummed and pulled his hands back, he was up most of the night contemplating last night’s events and coming to a decision he never thought he’d actually make.
“I want to release these songs.” Regulus murmured, still gazing at the vast land that surrounded the hotel. Thumbing the book in his lap he closed it and slid it across the table. Barty picked it up first and scanned it’s cover jokingly saying, “ We finally get to see the innards of the infamous Black Journal. Why if I knew you’d actually show it to us I’d hall your brother’s arse here sooner.”
Regulus rolled his eyes and groaned at the mention of Sirius. As Barty cracked open the book he locked eyes with Regulus who nodded his consent. The boy was horrible in his attachment to that book since his Hogwarts days. So to give them free reign with it meant so much to the trio. He was practically baring his soul for them to see and Barty would be damned if he didn’t take the utmost care of it.
Barty flipped through the pages and felt eyes grow glassy at the contents. He soon passed it to Pandora who took her time looking through it before hastily giving it to Evan.
“I didn’t know you kept all of this.” Evan mumbled stopping at different pages. “You wrote down all of it, didn't you. When we left, our fears and hurt, our anger. It’s all here.”
It was all there. When Pandora hummed harmonies if she felt that overwhelming sadness wash over her. When Barty got angry and picked up his guitar to play different riffs and when Evan got so lost in his mind only making up and playing out different beats could help him cope. Regulus made note of it all.
“They weren’t like the rest of our songs so I kept them in here. I–it feels right to release them now don’t you think?”
“Are you sure lionheart?” Pandora asked and all of them knew what she was asking. Will you be okay? Will we be okay?
“Always.”
And with that Barty began to laugh, so free and unhinged and just him. Evan joined in much the same while Pandora jumped up to hug Regulus whose chair tipped over as she threw herself on him making them end up on the ground. Barty and Evan joined too, piling onto Regulus who huffed out a laugh and tried to shove them off of him.
“I despise you all.” Regulus groaned fondly as someone elbowed him.
“You love us don’t lie.” Evan chimed in, sticking his tongue out and trying to put all his body weight on them.
“You’re a child.” Regulus intoned trying to wiggle out of their grasps.
“You’re all children actually.” An amused voice carried from the door to the balcony. Narcissa was standing there looking as refined as one could at seven in the morning.
“So am I actually.” Alice walked from behind Narcissa and immediately joined the group that was piled ontop of eachother. She threw herself ontop of Evan’s back who groaned and cursed making Pandora squeal and Barty coughed out a laugh.
“For fucks sake.” Regulus muttered and gazed at Cissa, eyes pleading her to make his torture end. She simply smiled and took a seat at the coffee table, reaching for a biscuit.
“Literally die the lot of you.”
“Love you!” They all chimed in, leaving Regulus horrified. It would do him no good if they all shared one brain cell.
Soon enough they all got up and resumed sitting at the table. Regulus knew it then that they were waiting until he inevitably told them all that happened the night before. Running his fingers through his black curls Regulus slumped in his seat and began telling them all of the conversation he had with his bro– no, that he had with Sirius last night. He told them about what the older boy said before Regulus lost it.
Surprisingly the most furious of them all was Pandora or rather not surprising at all. Regulus recalled months ago Barty talking about how Dora had just about broken the man’s nose for him.
“I love you as my brother lionheart but the next time I see him I will kill him. Actually Xeno has a large mansion somewhere in Manchester, I’m sure he wouldn’t mind if Barty and Evan tortured someone there. He likes you, you know and he finds you funny, I’m sure he’d join in if I explained.” Pandora grinned as she began to plot with Alice chiming in at intervals on how to dispose of the body and Narcissa giving tips to make the pain most intolerable while Barty and Evan came up with ways to kidnap the man.
Regulus relaxed in his chair and observed them. His family. Sirius was wrong. Whatever Walburga said about Regulus was wrong. He had all he needed with him. Everyone that mattered stayed in his life and Regulus was content with what he had. He didn’t need anyone else.
“Holy fuck.” Barty cursed as he examined his phone. “Fucking bloody shit.”
Regulus felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and as he pulled it out he watched as everyone’s face dropped. The first thing he saw was the headline “ Black Heir: Victim or Attention Seeker?”
“What the ever loving fuck?!”
Regulus scanned through his phone. Articles and pictures of him being pulled off Sirius last night made headlines and stories of the night were being spoken about on news websites. Reading through some of them he clenched his jaw. They were basically either calling him a whore and bringing up past relationships of his or making him seem like a dainty victim and alluding to his once abusive household. There were even some mentions of Lupin and him having some torrid love affair that resulted in Regulus fighting his boyfriend.
What. The. Fuck.
“Someone needs to bleach my eyes after reading that one about Remus.” Barty scoffed and pretended to gag.
“Oh God did you see the one where they call Reg a ‘nice young man who’s clearly traumatised’ because he doesn’t speak a lot in interviews.” Evan choked out, passing his phone around to read the few lines. “Dorcas is going to kill you by the way.”
Regulus was about to retort when his phone rang. Great, speak of the devil and she’d call. “I know what you’re going to say and it’s really not my fault. You can even ask Cissa, you know she won’t lie.”
Dorcas was silent on her end of the line for a moment before he heard her sigh, “Want me to tell you the good news or the bad?”
Regulus placed his phone on the table for everyone to hear as Dora chose, “Bad first then good.”
“Okay, well you all know Remus right? The one Regulus is apparently having a love affair with? Well he changed studios earlier this year and that studio just happened to be ours and I’m now being told of it.”
Everyone was silent after that before Regulus dropped his head on the table and groaned. “The Gods fucking hate me. Maybe I should start going to church again or just walk down the road and drown myself in the bloody fucking lake.”
He heard Dorcas snort while the others snickered. She continued soon after, “Good news is that I’ve already begun doing damage work.”
“How lovely.” Regulus snarled as he raised his head from the table. “Anything else happening that will ruin my life? A meteor falling to earth heading right for Sicily or perhaps Walburga will decide to come back from the dead? Should I start stocking up on holy water?”
Narcissa, who was closest to him, pulled him into a hug, running her hands through his curls as tried to calm down. He vaguely heard Pandora end the call with Dorcas, and Barty and Evan muttering almost silently amongst themselves.
Taking a deep breath he pulled back from Cissa. If he was younger he’d be petrified of showing his emotions so freely around family. Now, he didn’t give a fuck. In public he was more stoic when coming to showing affection but when he was in private he loved it, not that he’d actually admit it to anyone.
Barty interrupted his thoughts as he cleared his throat and held up Regulus’ journal, “Who’s up for a bit of revenge with all of this gossip?”
And not for the first time this morning Regulus smiled.
—
It was close to ten in the night when the band got off the train and stumbled into their studio in London, waving past the security guard they rushed upstairs and all stumbled in. Dorcas and Marlene were there packing up and looking ready to go home.
“What the fuck.” Dorcas questioned as they rushed past her.
“No time, we need to record a song please.” Regulus hooked up his guitar and Barty’s as the rest of them went on hooking up different cables for their instruments and mics.
“You don’t pay me enough for this.” Dorcas grumbled as she sat back down with a confused Marlene.
“We’ll take you around the bloody world if you want!” Barty grinned as he took his guitar from Reg and slipped into place. “We’re ready when you are.”
As soon as Dorcas raised her thumbs they began.
“Welcome to the city of lies
Where everything's got a price
It's gonna be in your favorite place”
Regulus wrote this following his first ever drama. People were vicious when they first came into the big music scene making up the most outrageous things to get their one second of fame.
“This place is a circus, you just see the surface
They cover shit under the rug”
Regulus witnessed first hand that if you had enough money and came to your name, you could do the most heinous things and get away from it.
“Sip the gossip, drink 'til you choke
Sip the gossip, burn down your throat
You're not iconic, you are just like them all
Don't act like you don't know, so”
The chorus came to him a few hours ago on the train back to London. With a few shots in his system and lack of sleep, Regulus couldn’t find it in himself to care. So he did what he does best and wrote his revenge.
“Take your pills and dance all night
Don't think at all, that's the advice
So c'mon, let's try, it's just a taste”
Regulus remembered writing that after his first celebrity boyfriend tried to coerce him into doing cocaine with him in some random club in L.A. He learned his lesson with that one the hard way in the end.
“Just fill your drink with tonic gin, this is the American dream, so
Sip the gossip, drink 'til you choke
Sip the gossip, burn down your throat
You're not iconic, you are just like them all
Don't act like you don't know, so”