Chapter 30
Marlene didn't like lying to her best friend.
Lily had been with her through so much and yet Marlene knew she couldn't explain this to her.
Mary knew of course.
Mary was an expert at all things romantic.
But honestly, if it hadn't been for Marlene confessing her feelings to Mary and trying to kiss her in 3rd year, Marlene would be lying to her too.
Mary had been awfully kind about it.
Sparing Marlene's feelings and gently telling her that if she could like girls she would pick Marlene.
Though anyway it's spun rejection is still rejection.
After that, Marlene was very confused about a lot of things.
Mary had talked to her about a word she had never heard before as a wizard born.
Lesbian.
A girl who likes girls.
That was Marlene.
Marlene saw nothing wrong with this until she soon noticed no one else seemed to identify with that word.
All the girls Marlene knew were boy-mad.
And all the boys Marlene knew used that word to describe girls who rejected them.
Marlene never really thought it was a choice. She never saw boys that way.
They were great fun and she loved to play quidditch and talk to them but they weren't pretty and soft the way girls were.
They didn't wear flowy dressed or smell like flowers and fruit. They didn't have soft glossy lips or light and sweet voices.
Mary had all these things.
Marlene thought it was natural to love girls like this.
How could you not?
But when Mary explained to her that most girls liked boys.
Marlene had to ask what was wrong with her that she couldn't.
Marlene didn't think Lily would judge her. In fact Lily was the most open-minded people she knew. But a part of Marlene didn't know how to admit that she wasn't like other girls. That she liked other girls.
Lily seemed to have enough going on these days as it was.
Marlene had noticed how little Lily ate and how thin her friend was getting but she had no idea what was stressing her out so much.
Marlene didn't want to add to her problems by telling Lily her own.
She didn't think anyone else was like her till at the start of term she met Dorcas Meadows.
Most of Marlene's teammates were boys and Dorcas was the only girl on the Slytherin team.
She played so elegantly but viciously too.
Whipping around on her broom as if it was an extension of herself.
Her coal-black locks blew from her helmet in the wind.
She watched her put her teammates in line and take control.
Marlene didn't think anyone could put manners on Slytherin players.
Anyone except Dorcas apparently.
The Slytherin practice time was often after the Gryffindor teams.
Marlene was often the slowest in the dressing room after practice.
She'd feel shy changing around Ismelda Derrick the only other girl on the Gryffindor team.
Ismelda was tall and curvy. She was dating the Hufflepuff captain. She was very pretty but tended to be quite standoffish and cold towards Marlene.
Marlene took this down to Ismelda being a 7th year and probably thinking Marlene was too young to befriend.
Still, Marlene felt uncomfortable getting changed with Ismelda. She was scared of looking at her too much or Ismelda looking back.
Marlene didn't know much about being a Lesbian but she knew it made public changing rooms awkward.
Then one day when Marlene had delayed changing so much that the Slytherin team was joining the pitch, Dorcas Meadows came in.
Marlene felt horribly exposed standing in her bra and knickers in front of her.
Dorcas was very beautiful out of her Quidditch gear. Her hair fell down her shoulders.
The dark green of her tie complemented her regal features.
She walked in with a certain confidence that faltered ever so slightly as she saw Marlene.
"Sorry I thought you all had left." She said cooly.
"Sorry no I um haven't gotten changed yet." Marlene gestured at her uniform sitting on the dressing room bench.
Dorcas took a long and uncomfortable look at Marlene.
Marlene shifted under her gaze.
"I see," Dorcas said in a casual tone.
With that, she turned around and started to strip out of her uniform.
Dorcas was tall and elegant. Her dark skin was smooth and soft-looking. Shoulders blades piercing the skin around her bra.
Marlene felt her face flush a deep red.
Dorcas Meadows was incredibly beautiful and Marlene felt like an awkward child standing there short and skinny in a vest bra and knickers.
Dorcas turned around as if she could hear Marlene's thoughts and raised an eyebrow when she saw the small blonde girl staring.
"Are you not going to get dressed?" She asked Marlene, eyebrow still raised.
Marlene turned even redder feeling her blush spread out to her ears.
"Yes, uh," Marlene turned around and fumbled with her clothes "sorry."
"Mckinnon right?" Dorcas said still facing Marlene's direction.
"Yeah, Marlene Mckinnon. You're Dorcas Meadows I've seen you play. You're good."
Marlene spluttered still fiddling with her clothes.
"You're not bad either," Dorcas said in that cool relaxed voice. "For a Gryfindor that is."
Marlene spun back around suddenly defensive.
"Hey, what's that supposed to mean!"
She said losing all anger as she looked back at Dorcas who was standing in her underwear arms crossed.
Marlene quickly brought her gaze to the floor respectfully.
"God you Gryfindors sure are feisty," Dorcas said for the first time since she had spoken sounding slightly amused.
Dorcas moved closer to Marlene and Marlene felt the blush run down her neck.
She kept her gaze down on the floor.
"Hm." Dorcas hummed lightly "I thought I was the only Lesbian in fifth year."
Marlene's head snapped up looking up at Dorcas in horror.
"But.. how? How did you know?"
"Well, most straight girls don't care about seeing a girl in her underwear." Dorcas smiled. Leaning down and looking Marlene in the eyes.
Marlene was filled with adrenaline and fear.
She leant forward and kissed Dorcas Meadows.
Since then the two would meet in the locker room to make out between practices.
Marlene had never felt such a rush before.
Kissing Dorcas felt so right but she knew that it had to be a secret.
Marlene wouldn't see Dorcas out of their locker room if it wasn't for a match. It was as if they only existed in there. And for now, that was enough.
Eventually, she did tell Mary the only other person who knew about her liking girls.
Mary seemed delighted for her when she told her. Saying.
"Oh, I've seen her! The tall pretty one. I absolutely love what she does with her hair."