My best wishes
It’s been a week since Regulus ended (ended?) things with him, a pretty bad week where he’s been moping but feeling alright enough to keep trying because that is what he told Regulus and he plans to keep trying. James just knows that he is worth it, everything about Regulus is worth it.
James remembers the way it was to fall asleep next to him and thinking of letting a space between them so he feel more comfortable only to wake up with Regulus’ head resting on his chest and James’ arms wrapped around him, their legs tangled and neither of them having an idea of how they ended like that, just drawn to the other. James woke up a few minutes before Sirius bursted into his room and found James and his brother in the same bed. James wasn’t going to explain himself to Sirius because there was nothing to explain, well yeah there was, but why did he have to explain himself? Then he remembered it was Sirius’ little brother and James tried to talk but Sirius was already leaving the room and Regulus was waking up, but as soon as he saw Sirius all his face changed.
Then he ended things because of Sirius, apparently.
Sirius has been walking on eggshells around him because of it and James is tired of it. He hates feeling him far and distant, cold even. He misses Sirius’ warmth. Lily has helped him a lot, she talks to him whenever he needs her to, he never tells him he does but she has a way of knowing beforehand. He likes having someone to talk to. But he misses his best friend, his soulmate, his other half. And the worst part is he knows Sirius misses him as well, he can feel it.
So today, he decides he has enough, he gets up and goes straight to Sirius and Remus’ room, he knocks and Remus opens the door, looking very awake even though it is past midnight. He gives James a sympathetic smile and lets him in.
“Love,” Remus says to Sirius, they are more asleep than awake, so they just make a sound letting Remus know he is listening. “I’ve got to go with Lily,” he probably doesn’t, but Remus is also his best friend and he is doing him a solid one right now.
“Don’t be late,” Sirius replies and sinks into the mattress. “Love you,” they say and Remus doesn’t miss the way his eyes go soft and a smile brightens his face.
“Love you too,” Remus says back and then turns to James and whispers so Sirius doesn’t hear him. “I won’t come back until morning. Stay here with him,” Remus pulls him to a hug. “Love you too, Prongs, you know that right?” James nods. “I hate when you two are like this, you have missed each other that it has been killing me,” he pulls away. “This has a solution, it’s not going to last forever.”
James wants to believe him and he does. There’s no way on earth something can come between James and Sirius, what they have is not something they can just break, they are bonded for life and it should be scary but it isn’t, it is actually one of the things that soothes him in life. Knowing that they have something so personal and loving, James is thankful to have them, having someone you can trust will never judge you or leave you, even in the immensity of their job.
He gets into bed facing Sirius, he sinks too into the mattress and as soon as Sirius feels an extra weight, he opens his eyes. Sirius just looks at him and then smiles.
“Hey, Prongs,” they whisper. “Moony ain’t going to be back, right?”
“Nope, I have you all to myself. Honestly it’s like your man is trying to lose you against me,” James jokes. Sirius chuckles. “How are you, Pads?” he asks.
“I’m fine,” he answers almost automatically. James tilts his head a little, letting them know that he doesn’t believe them. “I mean, as fine as I can be with how things are going. The shows are amazing, as well as the fans, everything with Remus is better than alright and I feel happy about all that, but when it comes to him?” He closes his eyes. “I don’t know what it is that I am feeling,” he opens his eyes and sighs. “I love him more than I allow myself to admit, James, and that makes everything worse because he hurt me and I am still so angry at him. Then, the fact that he uses what happened with us as an excuse to not be with you,” they look at James, there is fear as well as sadness in their eyes. “I can’t be the reason why you are hurt,” James lifts his hands up and holds both sides of Sirius’ face, delicately.
“Sirius, listen to me, okay?” They nod. “I don’t blame you for what Regulus decided. I don’t,” he says firmly. And it is the truth. He’s known for a long time that Sirius had problems with his brother and he knows that those problems have nothing to do with him, he knows better than to take it personally against his best friend.
“But he said it, James. It’s because of me and I don’t know how to fix it,” they say and it breaks James’ heart the way they say it.
“I understand what he said and why he is saying it,” because he does, he can see in Regulus’ eyes that he misses his brother and as Sirius, he is angry. “But I’m asking you not to let that break us apart, Sirius. You are my best friend, I can’t stand when you put a distance between us because I never learned what to do with that, that is something we’ve never known,” he exhales.
“I’m not trying to break us, but I feel so broken,” Sirius says. “He makes me remember and I feel awful for wanting him far away just to not remember that life, not remember her. But I don’t ever want to be far from him again, I’ve missed him and I didn’t know how much until I saw him.”
“Have you tried talking to him? Not arguing, just talking,” James asks. He’d like to believe he knows Regulus, maybe not like Barty or Evan do, but Regulus has talked to him for hours, they talked about all kinds of things and he could see the Regulus that isn’t so defensive all the time.
“No,” he answers. “I think mostly I’m afraid of what he’ll say or worse, what I’ll say. I don’t know, I feel tired.”
Yeah, he gets that, he knows they are not talking about it in a physical way, but emotionally. James has been there and it is exhausting, add the touring to the mix and the travelling, it can get dangerous for your mental health. In James’ case, when he reaches that point, he calls his mum and they talk for hours. On their first tour, he asked Pandora to get him a therapist because it was too much, he got better eventually.
He still has his therapist number on hand if he needs to.
“Then let’s rest for tonight,” James says and opens his arms so that Sirius can cuddle with him. Sirius moves instantly towards him. “Everything’s gonna be fine, Padfoot,” he says.
“I really hope so,” Sirius whispers as he starts to fall asleep. “Prongs?”
“Yeah?”
“Happy birthday,” they say and James smiles because he forgot it was already his birthday.
“Thank you, Pads.”
When he wakes up, Sirius isn’t there, but he has six pairs of eyes on him. Well, he can’t see shit because he isn’t wearing his glasses but there are six people around the bed and just looking at him.
“Oh, he is awake,” someone says and he knows it is Marlene.
“Fucking finally,” Peter says. “I’m starving, he is supposed to be the one that wakes up before us.”
“Cut him some slack, had an emotional night,” Sirius defends him as he always does.
“On your bed?” Mary asks, entertained and James may not see shit, but he knows she is asking Remus.
“I told you it was a matter of time before I stole your man,” James says before Remus can answer. They laugh as James sits in the bed and puts his glasses on.
“You fucking wish,” Remus says and pulls Sirius, who is on his left, closer to him. Sirius moves willingly and smiles when Remus presses a kiss on their hair.
“Happy birthday, James,” Lily says. She is the closest to him, standing on his left and offering him a smile. He returns the smile.
“Happy birthday, Prongs,” Peter says next to Marlene.
There is a round of congratulations from his friends and James feels so happy he is vibrating. These people have been with him every step of the way, since they were kids, now they all are adults and they are still together. He could cry. They’ve come so far and gone through a lot together. He loves them so much.
There is a knock on the door and Remus goes to see who it is, seconds later he is back with Pandora next to him. James is still sitting on the bed and Pandora makes her way to hug him and hand him a present.
“Oh, you didn’t have to,” James says and it is true. He likes receiving gifts but he doesn’t mind if people don’t give him anything. A smile and a hug is more than okay.
“But I wanted to,” she smirks. “Happy birthday, my love,” her eyes are soft on him, he knows that Pandora loves them, she’s been the one that had helped them since they started touring and he would never ask for another manager, she is amazing. And James cares so much for her, she is his friend besides his manager. Another member of their family.
“Thank you, Pan,” he smiles at her.
“Yeah, yeah, happiest of birthdays, get ready Prongs, we are going out to have breakfast,” Sirius says and everybody starts scrambling around the room to give him space so he can get up.
He has to go back to his room because he didn’t bring any of his stuff with him and he would really like to have a shower before starting the day. He is smiling while walking the hall, his room is just three doors away from where he was, but in between those doors he crosses with Evan who smiles at him. Evan is always kind to him, despite keeping his distance because of his friendship with Regulus.
“Good morning, Evan,” he tells him and Evan looks a bit taken off but smiles anyway.
“Morning, James,” he replies and James is about to keep walking but he turns to face Evan who is walking to another room.
“Hey, Evan?”
“Yeah?” he asks and turns to look at James.
“We are going out to have breakfast if you want to come,” he says quickly, James really wants them to feel included and not left out. “You can tell Barty and Reg to come along,” he scratches the back of his neck. He is a bit intimidated by Barty; he is not gonna lie, but he wants them to be with him on his birthday.
“Oh, uh… I’ll ask them,” Evan says but he doesn’t sound sure they’ll want to. “James, can I invite Dorcas?” he asks.
“Dorcas?” he asks, forgetting for a moment how she is, but then he remembers as fast as he forgot. “Of course! The more the better. We are leaving in less than an hour,” he informs him and Evan nods and enters the room.
And with that James continues his way to his room. He thinks about his conversation with Sirius and the way he was so sad while talking about his little brother, it makes James want to take all his pain away and make it his, so that they won’t feel it. He knows he can’t do that and it makes him feel a bit useless, but it is something the brothers have to do on their own.
He sighs and continues to get ready, he is excited to spend it with the people he loves the most, the only ones missing are his parents. Moony’s sisters are still with them, they decided to stay for a couple of more weeks touring with them, Hope left the next day of the show but Amelia, Donna and Sabina will stay with them until they go back to the UK, he likes having them around, he considers Amelia a close friend, despite what happened between them. He is not that close with Donna and with Sabina they have a good relationship, she is amazing pranking people and going unnoticed, they’ve pranked Sirius and Peter so many times, Remus is off limits according to Sabi, but that’s okay, they have a lot of fun. He loves Remus’ sisters so much, they bring life to the tour if he is honest.
Someone knocks his door, he opens it thinking it will be Sirius or Lily but it is Amelia. He smiles at her and she hugs him.
“Hey, old man,” she says. “I heard it’s your birthday or whatever,” she rolls her eyes when she pulls away.
“Ah, you say that as if you weren’t counting down the days,” he jokes.
“Oh shoot, was I so obvious?” she puts a hand to her chest and fakes surprise.
“I’m afraid you were,” James nods his head looking at her with fake pity. “It’s okay, we all know you are obsessed with me, can’t say I blame you there,” he smirks and shrugs. Amelia punches him in the arm.
“You wish, old man,” she rolls her eyes again.
“I’m only a year older than you,” James laughs and lets her into the room as he goes to look for his wallet and phone, as well as other stuff he thinks he will need and goes back to Amelia.
“Remus texted, we gotta get going,” she says, still looking at her phone. Amelia is pretty, her hair is wavy and falls past her shoulders, her nose is almost perfect and her eyes are the same colour as Remus’, brown with a bit of green. She is funny but can be mean, her sense of humour is almost identical to Remus’.
“Let’s go then,” James says, she gets up and he opens the door letting her out first. “We’re meeting them in his room or downstairs?”
“Downstairs, they are already there.”
They go to the elevator only to see that Barty, Evan and Regulus are waiting for it as well. James can’t help but stare at Regulus, he is so pretty and beautiful, his hair is perfect, there is no other way to describe it. Little strands fall on his forehead, but they don’t cover his eyes. His shirt is a dark blue, making his eyes look a bit bluer.
Once Regulus notices James looking at him, he checks him out and then sees to his side, to where Amelia is and his eyes change immediately. He turns to say something to Barty and he nods, smirking.
“Hey, James, do you know where we are going?” Amelia asks him.
“Not really, they never tell me this day,” James shrugs. “Kind of a tradition by now.”
“Bumer, I just hope my brother didn’t choose, he is bad at those things,” she rolls her eyes and James chuckles.
“He is not that bad,” he says and Amelia deadpans him. “Okay, yeah a bit, but no, I think it is Marlene or Lily who chose.”
“Oh, that’ll make more sense,” Amelia says and then looks past James where the others are. “Are you coming as well?” she asks them and Barty stares at her, Regulus doesn’t bother looking but Evan smiles at her.
“Yeah, James invited us earlier,” he says. “Kinda wish we knew where we’re going to know if I’m well dressed,” he shakes his head still smiling.
“You look good,” James says and that makes Regulus turn to see him.
“Thanks, mate, you too,” Evan smiles. James smiles, because he put some thought into his outfit.
The elevator finally stops, for what felt like an eternity to go down. As soon as the doors open he sees his friends chatting in the lobby, there are some vans waiting for them outside as well as a few fans. He can see that Remus and Sirius are keeping their distance, Remus is standing with Lily and Peter, while Sirius is chatting with Donna and Mary. Sabina is standing by herself with her headphones on. Marlene is chatting with Dorcas and Pandora.
James decides to get close to where Lily, Remus and Peter are, as soon as James and Amelia are close, Remus puts an arm around Amelia’s shoulder and rest his weight on her, there is a difference in their height, but everyone standing next to Remus is gonna be shorter so it isn’t a fair comparison. Still, Amelia is short, maybe around Lily’s height.
“So, where are we going?” James asks his friends.
“We still don’t know, Sirius wanted to take care of it,” Peter answers.
“Did he?”
“Yeah, he kind of wanted to make it up for last week,” Peter shrugs and James smiles, his best friend is adorable.
It takes a couple of minutes for someone from security to tell them everything is ready to get going, the fans are standing on both sides of the hotel doors and the vans are ready to go. A couple of fans try to stop him but he has to give them apologetic looks because this time he can’t stop to say hi.
The restaurant Sirius chose is beautiful, it serves mainly breakfasts and lunch which is nice, the place isn’t too big or too crowded, which is amazing. They have a reservation but had to add a couple of chairs so The Sekans and Dorcas can sit. James sits in the middle of the table with Sirius at his right and Marlene on his left, Remus is in front of him with Amelia on his right and Lily next to her; Peter on Remus’ left and Mary next to him, Donna next to her and Sabina in front of her sister. Pandora sits next to Lily and Dorcas in front of her, in between Marlene and Emmeline. That leaves the seat next to Sirius free as well as the ones in the head of the table.
Evan sits in one of the head seats, between Dorcas and Pandora, they welcome him happily, Barty and Regulus are talking without even noticing how everyone else is sitting, Barty picks the first empty chair, which is the other head seat, he sees and that leaves Regulus to sit between Sabina and Sirius.
James gets anxious about the two brothers sitting together, but they mainly just ignore each other, not even glancing at the other. Sirius makes conversation with him and Regulus finds himself talking with Sabi. Everyone looks like they are having a good time and that makes James happy, this is a great day. He misses his parents but he’ll call them later on the day.
After they have breakfast, they keep chatting and then a waitress comes with a cake and puts it in front of James, he turns to see Sirius and they have a little smile on his face, meaning that he asked them to bring it. His friends stop chatting and start cheering.
“Happy birthday, James!” Marlene tells him and puts an arm around his shoulders and holds him close to her.
“Thank you, Marls,” he says, smiling and she gives him a kiss on the cheek and lets him go. “And thank you everyone, it means a lot that you are here with me,” he looks at everyone at the table. When his eyes land on Regulus, he is already looking at him making James’ breath go away, because he is weak for Regulus, so weak. Before he looks away, he swears there is a small smile on Regulus’ face.
“Of course we would be here, Prongs,” Sirius tells him and his eyes are full of love and appreciation.
“Sirius,” Pandora calls them and points to her phone.
“Oh, we have a surprise for you, James,” Sirius says excited. “We should get the bill and get going,” they inform the rest and everybody agrees, James suspects they know what the surprise is. Lily and Amelia share a look with him and he knows they are also on board with what the surprise is. He has a love-hate relationship with surprises, his anxiety can’t handle it but he likes that people put in the effort of planning something for him. James looks at the girls and shakes his head, smiling because he really has the best friends in the world.
They pay and get into the vans, he sits next to Peter and Amelia, surprisingly Regulus and Evan are in this van, maybe so he can be far from Sirius who is in the other van along with Pandora, Barty, Marlene, Dorcas, Donna and Emmeline. The rest of them are with him in this van.
“Hey, Lils,” he calls for Lily who is sitting in front of him, she turns to see him.
“Yeah?”
“Remember what I told you I’d do if we got a show on my birthday?” he asks, her eyes instantly sparkling.
“You should totally do it! Have you told Pan? I could ask her, but do it now,” she says, talking fast.
“I already told her, I have a green light,” he smiles.
“What are you doing?” Amelia asks.
“You’ll see, check Twitter in a minute,” James tells her as he pulls out his phone and opens the app. It’s been a long time since he did it, generally he lets his team handle their social media, except for his own accounts which he doesn’t generally use but he wants to do it himself.
@James_Potter
Hey! Since I was 17 I celebrated my birthday with themed parties and this year I wanted to invite you all to go on theme, dressed up as your favourite character or superhero for tonight’s show! Can’t wait to see you there xx
In seconds the tweet has a lot of likes, retweets and replies, he is excited for tonight’s show to feel like a big party with his friends and fans. This is the first time he has a show on his birthday and he always wanted it because it would feel more complete with the people that have supported him throughout the years.
“What are you wearing?” Amelia asks him once she reads his tweet.
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” James wiggles his eyebrows at her.
“How on Earth would you dress up as the Lightning McQueen?” Regulus asks and James can notice he didn’t mean to say it out loud.
“What a great question, Star. But I won’t go as the Lightning McQueen,” James smiles because Regulus remembered he loves that movie and automatically thought he would dress up as that. But also, because he most likely saw his tweet, which means he looked him up.
After that, Regulus doesn’t say anything and keeps quiet for the rest of the ride. He knows he can’t expect more, but at least he knows Regulus remembers stuff like James does, maybe it’d be nothing to some but to James it is everything. He continues talking with Peter and Amelia while Remus engages in a conversation with Lily about what they will wear. James has been thinking about what he’ll wear for a while now, he told Pandora this idea a couple of days ago and she was all in, talked with their team and they were on board.
When they park, the number of fans is even more than what they left, some of them scream wishing him a happy birthday and others just scream in excitement. Sirius is waiting for him near the doors of the lobby -seen as their van parked first- and they are smiling so much it may hurt his cheeks.
“What is up with you?” James asks him as he stands next to him. Sirius puts an arm around his shoulders and pulls him close.
“Well you do have a surprise waiting for you, Prongs,” they say and leads him to the elevator, Lily waiting for them there as well as Marlene, Remus most have already gone up with Peter.
“I’m kind of nervous,” he informs his friends.
“Don’t be, you’ll like this surprise,” Marlene brushes him off with a flick of her hand.
Marlene is right, he does like it very much. Once they lead him to his room and open the door, he can see that his parents are sitting on the couch. His mum, as beautiful as ever, gets up and pats his dad on the shoulder so he does the same thing. Effie opens her arms and James almost runs to them, he is taller than his mum, but he loves to put his arms around her waist, it doesn’t matter that he has to bend a little. His father then holds him and James feels complete. His day couldn’t get better.
“Happy birthday, my boy,” Effie tells him and honestly, James could cry because of how happy he is.
“You are here,” he manages to say.
“Of course we are, Sirius bought our tickets and everything,” she says, smiling at James and then looking at Sirius who is behind him. “Come here, love, wanna hug you too,” she gestures with her hand to get closer and of course they do.
“Hi, mum,” they tell her in between the hug. Sirius tilts his head while keeping it resting on her shoulder to see Monty next to Effie. “Hey, dad. Missed you a lot,” they say and James knows how much weight his words have.
“Oh, we missed you too,” Effie tells them as he pulls away from the hug.
“Mum,” Sirius says and sits on the couch. “I have to tell you something,” the mood instantly shifts in the room. Effie looks at them expectant and patient. “Do you remember I told you I have a little brother who I lost contact with a while ago?”
“Yes, what about him?”
“Well,” Sirius takes a deep breath. “He’s here.”
“Oh, you invited him?” Effie asks.
“Uh, not exactly. He is in the new band touring with us, he and his best friends,” they explain, Effie and Monty look at Sirius, preoccupied but fond. “And,” Sirius turns to look at James and he just nods, giving him permission. “He is James’ star,” Effie looks at him and Monty almost breaks his neck with how fast he turns to see James.
“Did you know?” Monty asks.
“Of course not, dad,” James snorts. “Sirius told me a couple of days after the tour started.”
“Oh, my boys, what did you get yourself into?” Effie asks.
“Wish I knew, mum,” Sirius says at the same time James says “I don’t know.”
“Have you both talked to him since the tour started?” Fleamont asks them.
“I have,” James says. “Not now because he is avoiding me, but we’ve talked.”
“I haven’t, He won’t even look at me,” Sirius sighs. James turns to look at the room just to find that his friends left his room and closed the door, which he appreciates.
“Give time to time, love,” Effie tells them while stroking his hair, Sirius closes his eyes to the touch of their mother. “Maybe Regulus,” she says even though no one has mentioned his name, there’s no need to, that’s just how Effie is really, she’ll remember every little or big detail about her children. “Needs a little more time to come to terms that his life is also changing in more ways than you could imagine, he’s been thrown to fame and he finds out his brother is here and also James, just to learn that you two are best friends, it must be a lot for that boy,” Monty nods, agreeing with their mother.
“I actually talked to him about something like that, but didn’t realise how hard all of this must be for him,” James says and thinks about all of what Reg said.
“I haven’t thought about it that way if I’m being honest,” Sirius grimaces and rests his weight on Effie, who’s now sitting next to him. Monty is on the other side of Sirius and James is standing in front of them.
“Well, now you are,” Effie shares a soft smile with them and that seems to ease Sirius a lot.
They stay a couple of minutes chatting about other things, then Effie and Monty excuse themselves saying that it’s been a long day with the travelling and all of that. Sirius decides to stay with James before they get going to the venue where they are going to dress up and get ready. James has already told Emmeline and Pandora what he wants to dress up like and they loved it, he can’t wait to see what the other dress up like.
Since he was little he loved themed parties, but nobody ever liked to do it with him, except for maybe Peter and Sirius, and then the girls joined him and it’s been like a tradition that every year on his birthday they will have a party to remember. Years ago, they decided to go to Las Vegas and the theme was just “casino”. James wishes he could say it was a trip to remember but well, he doesn’t. He got incredibly drunk and can’t remember shit.
They have to go to the venue earlier than they are used to because Emmeline has a lot to work on, how did she get all the stuff they needed in such short notice? James has no idea, but he admires her. If he’s being honest, he is dying to see if Regulus dresses up, he seems like the type of person who wouldn’t do it, but James hopes he is. He won’t lie, he is also intrigued about Evan and Barty, he doesn’t know them well enough to know what they’ll wear or even if they’ll wear something.
To be honest, he doesn’t even know what his own friends are wearing, not even Sirius told him anything. He tried to ask Lily what she was wearing and she distracted him with another thing and then he forgot he even asked. James also tried to persuade Pete into telling him but he just laughed, patted his shoulder and went away. Apparently, they agreed not to tell him anything, even Dorcas, Emme and Pandora decided not to tell him anything, to the point of sending James to another room so he can get ready and he had forbidden to go out until they say so, which kind of sad given that it is his birthday, but he’ll take it.
And now he is waiting in his lonely room, but he has to go to the restroom and this room doesn’t have its own, so he leaves the room. He looks to the ground, avoiding looking up in case any of his friends are around. He stumbles a little with stuff around him, but he manages to get into the restroom, he knows there is no one in there because everybody uses the one that are in the rooms, when he looks up he is shook to see another person frozen in place.
“Oh,” James says and then laughs because the other person is dressed up as Spiderman, just like James is. The difference is that James is wearing the Miles Morales suit while the other person is wearing the suit from The Amazing Spiderman. “That’s amazing…, get it?” James says and laughs at his own joke. James is wearing the shorts and a similar jacket to the one Miles uses in the movie, while the other person is only wearing the suit and the mask is on their face. “Shoot, sorry, I wasn’t allowed to see anyone,” James says but does nothing to look away.
“This is torture,” the other person says, shaking their head and slowly removing their mask. James knows who it is before the mask is fully off, that voice he will never forget.
Regulus’ curls bounce around and he shakes his head a little trying to get his hair out of his face. James is speechless, because he does look amazing, that’s the thing. He looks way too good for James’ own sake, he is -holy fucking god- wearing eyeliner again, a mix of blue and red on his eyes, the red goes up under is eyes while the blue goes down on the top of the eye and honestly James has no idea if he has to curse Emmeline or thank her for what he has done with Regulus’ make up.
“Now, that,” he points to Regulus, more specifically, his make up. “Is torture,” James says and Regulus looks at him.
“I’m torture? God, James, have you even fucking seen yourself?” he sounds exasperated and a bit flustered. James is also wearing eyeliner, just a subtle black eyeliner, nothing too extravagant but it is there and it is nothing like what Regulus has on.
“Nothing compares to you, Star. You look so beautiful,” James wants to reach him, wants to touch him so much that his hands are itching. “Can I get closer?”
“I, uh- yeah,” Regulus hesitates but agrees and as soon as James is close to him, Regulus shuts his eyes for two seconds just to open them again.
“I’ve missed you, you know?” James says softly, still fighting the urge to touch him. “I see you everyday and I still miss you, Star, that is torture,” he still speaks softly. “God, you really are pretty, love,” it almost hurts how much he wants to touch Regulus, almost as much as it hurts to see him. Who let him be that pretty? How is that allowed?
“I hate you so much when you say things like that,” Regulus says in the same tone James has been talking.
“I can’t help myself, you deserve to hear that you are beautiful, Regulus.”
“It’s just a Spiderman suit, James,” he rolls his eyes.
“Yeah…, not gonna lie, that is doing it for me,” James scratches the back of his neck. Spiderman is one of James’ favourite characters and now he’s looking at Regulus as Spiderman… It is kind of hot.
“Really, James?” he deadpans.
“Yeah,” he chuckles.
“I really hate you.”
“Do you?”
“No,” Regulus says and closes the distance between them, putting his arms around James' shoulders, one hand on the back of his neck and James holds him by the waist. “I’m gonna regret this,” Regulus says once their lips are barely touching.
“I hope you don’t,” it’s the last thing James says before kissing him, Regulus kisses him back instantly. The kiss is eager, just feeling the other and James feels complete. This right here is what was missing for his birthday. He really missed Regulus, he loves spending time with him and being near him, his hair, his eyes, his mouth Everything that makes him Regulus was lacking in James’ life.
“I’ve missed you too,” Regulus says against his lips just to kiss him again. They kiss for a while, maybe not so long or maybe it was, he isn’t sure, it always happens when he kisses Regulus. Time stops being important. He lifts Regulus, holding his legs and Regulus automatically wraps them around his waist, then presses him against the closest wall. James goes straight to his neck and starts kissing there, Regulus whimpers, he whimpers. Good Lord, he is not going to make it.
“God, I like you so much,” James says, lost in the feeling and sounds his star is making. “So, so much. You have no idea,” he kisses his neck with fervour and purpose, he tries not to leave any marks.
“Then tell me,” Regulus says, tilting his head to the back, resting it also in the wall, allowing more space for James to kiss. “Tell me how much you like me,” he sighs and squirms.
“I like you so much, love, all of you,” he says against his neck. “The way you talk, you sing, you play the bass,” he bites Regulus’ neck, drawing a sound out of him. “I like your eyes so much,” James says and makes him look at him, Regulus’ eyes look darker. “And your lips,” he kisses him. “All of you, mon etoile, all of you,” James says.
“Let me down,” Regulus orders, James obeys. As soon as Regulus is standing on the floor, he turns places with James, pushing him against the wall.
And that is hot.
“Goddamn it, James, you are fucking perfect,” he says and then attacks his neck just as James was doing. The difference is that Regulus doesn’t hold back. “Fuck,” he says when he pulls away. “I left a mark,” he brushes the mark with his fingers, James shivers. Regulus doesn’t look apologetically, he looks proud.
“James?” they hear Peter calling.
“I hate your friends,” Regulus says. “They always interrupt,” he sighs but doesn’t get away from James.
“You’ll love them, Star, just wait.”
They do pull away and James hates it.
“Reg,” he calls him before he leaves.
“Yes?”
“Stop ignoring me, please, I really do like you,” James reaches to hold Regulus’ hand, he stares at the way their fingers are intertwined, but James can only look at the younger man. “I know this is a lot, with the tour, us and Sirius, but I’m here for you, let me be there for you,” he asks.
“It’s- it’s not easy, James,” he says in a way that may even be painful to admit it.
“I know, love, trust me I do. But you don’t have to do it alone,” James strokes his hand with his thumb. “Besides Barty and Evan, they can count on me too, although I’m not entirely sure they like me. I want you to know that I care about you, alright?”
“What about- uh…”
“Sirius?”
“Yeah, him.”
“Whatever it’s going on with you and him is a completely different thing from you and me, he knows it and I think you should too.”
“James?” They listen to Remus now.
“I’m going!” James screams back.
“I’ll see you tonight, is that alright?” Regulus asks him, still looking at their hands.
“Of course, Star. Always,” James offers him a smile, but Regulus' eyes are still on their hands. “Look at me, Reg,” he hesitates but eventually he does. “Anytime you need me, I’m here,” he says. Regulus gives him a little smile and James leans to kiss him and his star lets him.
When he finds Remus and Peter he is still feeling like he is floating because he just had a make out session with Regulus that he hasn’t noticed what his friends are wearing. They are looking at him with their eyebrows lifted.
“Pandora is going to kill you, mate,” Remus tells him and Peter nods along.
“Why?”
“Prongs, your neck,” Peter points towards his neck, James’ cheeks burn but he is beyond proud of his neck, even though he hasn’t seen it.
“Oh, yeah,” he chuckles.
“Jesus fucking Christ who attacked you?” Sirius asks when he gets to them. They think about it and then grimaces. “Well, he certainly wished you a happy birthday.”
James smiles and looks at his friends, this time he really looks at them. Peter is dressed up as Legolas from the Lord of the Rings, he even has pointy ears, the costume is very spot on and he really looks incredible. Remus chose something simpler but it looks so good on him, he chose Han Solo; he is wearing a t-shirt with a vest and jeans, the thing where Solo’s gun goes has his drumsticks and that looks really good (if it wasn’t his best friend’s partner he would be crushing so hard on Moony). Then lastly, Sirius is wearing a Deadpool suit and they look fantastic; Sirius really looks incredible, his hair is in a ponytail with little hair strands on his face. James honestly can’t stop looking at how his friends look.
“Wow, you look so good,” James tells his friends.
“So do you, mate, should’ve guessed you were going as some Spiderman,” Peter says and Remus nods.
“Guys! Where are you?” They all hear Lily approaching.
“In here, Lils!” Remus tells her.
Lily appears with Marlene and Mary following her close. Lily looks outstanding, she is dressed up as Valkyrie from Thor, she has a corset type adjusted to her body and all the little details, her hair is up and she has a -scary- make up under her eyes. Mary has a Black Panther suit on, she looks amazing, she has white eyeliner and details on her face and her hair is braided showing off her face. He wants to high five her, because he considered the same character. Marlene on the other hand is wearing- actually James has no clue what she is wearing, but she looks fabulous, her makeup is astonishing. Emmeline really outdid herself.
“Well hurry the fuck up, you still have to get re- James what the fuck happened to your neck?” Lily interrupts herself and all of the girls also turn to look at his neck. He feels observed but wont cover it because he is absolutely proud of Regulus doing it to him.
“You did have a happy birthday, didn’t you?” Marlene smiles at him with a knowing look.
“You know I did,” James shrugs.
“Whatever,” Sirius intervenes, probably not wanting to know the details about James and his little brother. “Lets go to Pandora and Emme,” they say and they all follow him.
Pandora does try to kill him, they are not allowed to have those kinds of marks on themselves, but she is also happy for him because at the end of the day, she loves her boys and wants them to be happy. He begs her to let him have it through the show, he wants Regulus’ mark on him, he is proud of it. Unfortunately, rules are rules and Emme has to cover it for the show. He hates that, but unknown to him is that Emmeline, as great as she is with makeup, doesn't cover it fully. You can still see through the thin layer of makeup, there is a faint bruise on his neck.
“How is it that all of you always look great? Is it part of being a singer? Because when on earth is that going to start happening to me?” Barty asks behind them, Evan and Regulus are on each of his side. Barty is wearing a similar suit as the last Batman movie, he has black eyeshadow on his eyes and he looks fit . James knows that Barty is an attractive man, he can’t deny that, somehow that upsets him. Evan apparently is not the kind of person that dresses up for themed parties, good for him, bad for James who almost pouts because not everyone is dressed up.
“You are a singer, Crouch, you always look good,” Mary rolls her eyes and Barty smirks at her, but they can see he is blushing.
“You do look good,” James tells him, because he wants The Sekans to feel included and part of their family. Regulus and Sirius tilt their heads at the same time, Sirius confused and Regulus looks mad or maybe jealous.
“I know I do, Potter,” Barty says as he puts an arm around Reg’s shoulders and rests his weight on him. James feels inevitably jealous.
“Potter?” James asks, confused because he’s never called him like that, but soon lets it go as The Sekans have to be on stage in less than five minutes.
James can only watch Regulus once they are on stage, he looks- and he’ll continue to make the same pun- amazing. He is breathtaking and the makeup on his eyes is absolutely distracting. There is something about the way Regulus is on stage that makes James want to admire him forever, he is a shining star. He holds his bass with such delicacy like if he has respect for it. James can’t understand how Regulus can’t see that he was also born to be on a stage, nobody has the magnetic field that he has.
He decides to watch their whole set, never looking away from Regulus for too much time. He does look at Evan and Barty, the three of them bring something so electrifying to the stage and the crowd can feel it. They all can feel it. Even Sirius ends up next to him, they even give him a little bump in the head when they realise he is watching Regulus way too long for it to be normal. James just smiles sheepishly.
The Sekans have been a great addition to the tour, without knowing that something was missing, they came to complete it. They are so different from what WOM3N and The Marauders have to offer, they are promising. They have everything they need to be successful; the looks, the voice and the talent. More than anything, they have a talent he hasn’t seen in a long time and the fact that they enjoy what they are doing just because they can do it as friends…, well, that makes James feel nostalgic and fond of them. He wasn’t lying or trying to get on Regulus’ good side when he told him that he was there for Evan and Barty too.
James also watches WOM3N’s set, they have a connection to the crowd different to the ones that The Marauders and The Sekans have, they connect with them in a way they could never and James knows exactly why; they empower them. It is a bilateral empowering, the crowd empowers them as well as they empower the crowd. There is something so real and honest in their songs that the public can understand and relate to, not that the other bands can’t, but it is not the same as what they say on their songs. Lily is the one who taught James the extent and impact that the songs they put out there can have in the people and the world in general. She’s always been someone that makes herself be heard, she just happens to have found her way to achieve that.
James’ birthday feels eternal, but he’s enjoying it no matter what. Being on stage hits him differently this time because he can see how most of the ones attending tonight’s show are wearing a costume or something that represents their favourite character.
“First of all,” he says at the middle of their show. “I want to thank every single one of you for coming,” he thanks them as he always does every show. “You look beautiful, Munich!”
“As you may or may not know,” Sirius starts saying. “Today is Prongs’ birthday!” The crowd roars.
“Our James here is growing up,” Peter wipes a fake tear.
“Yeah, he is old now,” Remus says in the back, James turns to see him with full offence.
“Oi, we are the same age?” Remus just shrugs and the crowd laughs in unison.
The fans -with Sirius’ help- sing him a happy birthday and he honestly thinks that it is in fact a very happy birthday. His day has been perfect with his friends and parents, Regulus and his fans.
He feels incredible happy when he gets to the hotel, exhausted as fuck but happy neverless. He knows that Regulus is planning on coming to his room tonight and that makes him feel eager, even if it is just to rest, as long as they do it together James feels quite content with that. While he waits, James grabs his phone to text his parents a goodnight as he does every night, thanks his friends for the perfect day he had and tells Regulus his room number. He also answers some of the birthday wishes and as he is scrolling through his texts he sees one that catches his attention.
Happy birthday, Mr. Potter. My best wishes to you. I hope you are making progress with the songs I asked you, I may be needing them soon, I expect at least two new songs for the following week.
Have a nice day, Mr. Potter.
A. Dumbledore