Chapter 4
Garreth slouched into the common room couch, staring lazily into the fireplace. Other students went to bed a while ago, so he used the much needed space to finally breathe following the duels.
When Charity cast that Bombarda, his gut screamed that something was wrong. She wasn’t exactly known to be a powerhouse when it came to spellcasting. In fact, when Maeve was telling him her thoughts on the Crossed Wands duelers this year, she had even said Charity was a defensive dueler. For her to whip out a cast so powerful it takes out the most talented dueler Garreth ever knew in only one hit just didn’t make sense. He didn’t want to dwell on it in front of other students, especially Maeve who was obviously having a much harder time, but he couldn’t stop wondering what could have happened.
There was really only one plausible explanation that came to his head, other than that she simply had gotten lucky that duel, and it involved some serious rule breaking. He wasn’t sure how he would ever be able to prove it, though. Sure, he feels like he maybe could’ve seen a slight red glow around Charity’s casting hand, but was he just thinking that because he wanted it to be true?
Stronger than his confusion was his worry about what this all meant for Maeve. Of course, it meant she was devastated - that much he knew from her sobbing the equivalent of the Black Lake into his robes. Some students might interpret her reaction to losing a duel as poor sportsmanship. To those students, Garreth wished to pour a vial of dizziness draught in their morning tea and drop them in the middle of the Forbidden Forest. He knew how much being a part of the Regional Tournament meant to her, and he was nervous about the emotional toll losing out on the opportunity would have on her. Would she stop dueling again? Would she start isolating herself just as she had after her father died?
“Well, you’re up late.” Natty announced her presence as she curled up on a chair across from Garreth.
He jumped slightly at the intrusion, not expecting to see anybody else tonight, but he quickly recovered. “Yeah, well, you too.” He lamely retorted.
“I never can sleep well when Rowan stays over. I love the girl, but she snores like a Graphorn.”
“So she was able to get some sleep?” Garreth asked, revealing his worry a bit more than he’d like.
Natty nodded, knowing they weren’t talking about Rowan anymore. “Yes, Maeve was able to get some sleep. Honestly, she has been surprisingly calm since we left the Quidditch pitch. I guess she left all of her tears on your shoulder.”
Garreth's ears began to burn. He didn’t have to look up to know Natty that was giving him that look - the look she gives him whenever Maeve is brought up, even though Garreth hasn’t so much as even hinted that he felt anything more than friendship towards her. He usually was able to deflect to something else whenever Natty gave him this look, refusing to dive deeper into topic he knew she was getting at, but right now he was trapped under her stare. There was nobody else to turn to, or activities he could deflect with. In trying to decide if he should completely ignore what Natty was implying or finally address it, he goes halfway. “Don’t make our friend’s misery about that.”
“You know that's not what I am doing. Your feelings for Maeve existed way before tonight.”
Garreth grimaced. The words were out there: your feelings for Maeve. He felt a safe amount of deniability before, because the words have never actually been said. Of course, he wasn't surprised at all that Natty had picked up on it, and probably Saoirse, and probably Rowan, too. After all, once he got the chance to actually get to know her, it was game over for him - he wanted to be in her presence all the time, period, and he was sure it was noticeable. Merlin, the entire school probably had caught on by now. But, it hadn’t actually been discussed before. When the topic only existed hypothetically, he could hide it away and not acknowledge it, but now it was brought out under a spotlight for him to address directly.
“Well, you know I can’t address it now, with the tournament and all, so what does it matter?” He spat, his tone much harsher than he intended.
“Don’t be so brazen.” Natty scolded. “I’m not accusing you of anything, Garreth. This isn’t a bad thing.”
He unexpectedly softened at the words. He hadn't realized it until she just said that, but he subconsciously had thought of his feelings for Maeve as something bad. For Godric’s sake, he hardly allowed himself to even think of the topic. Why? It didn’t take long for an answer to come to mind. Maeve was truly one of the most impressive people Garreth has ever known, and he was just... him. He had no idea what he could possibly bring to her life that she didn’t already have, but he did not at all want to risk his luck by asking more of her. “What she needs right now is a supportive friend, so that’s what I will be.”
Natty was clearly displeased with his answer, but she wasn’t one to pry. He was incredibly thankful for that. Garreth rose to his feet and dismissed himself to his dormitory.
The next morning, Garreth was surprised to find that he actually slept. It was restless sleep that included a lot of tossing and turning, but it was sleep nonetheless. However, instead of providing him with any true rest, he had a dream that left him dazed and emotionally raw. Naturally, it involved Maeve. His conversation with Natty last night was definitely to blame for bringing those emotions to the surface for his subconscious to cast a magnifying charm on.
In his dream, Maeve approached Garreth in the Great Hall, and told him that she found out that he had feelings for her. Not only that, but everybody knew. His entire body went cold as he slowly looked around to find the eyes of every single student on him, giving pathetic glances that accurately reflected just how hopeless he felt. Maeve told him that she didn’t feel the same way, and in fact, his feelings for her made her feel so uncomfortable that she no longer even wanted to be friends. To make matters even worse, she goes on to say that she actually has feelings for somebody else, and is going to start dating them instead. That's when he watched the arm of Sebastian Sallow wrap around Maeve and pull her into his side.
Garreth woke up then, and the slight relief that it was a dream was quickly overshadowed by how unnerved he now felt. If he wasn't sure how to articulate his nerves when he was awake, his dream sure did a splendid job of putting them on display for him in a way he wasn’t able to ignore. The contents of his dream were unwelcome but not unfamiliar, except for that last part. When did Sallow become a part of this? Was Garreth worried that Sebastian was going to get in the way of his relationship with Maeve? And more importantly, should he be?
Emotionally raw, entirely flustered and confused, and without any true rest, Garreth rose from his bed and left the dorm. It sounded like he was going to have a great day ahead.
He paused momentarily in the common room, debating on whether or not he should wait to see if Maeve would come down like he usually did. Ultimately, he decided not to, and left for the Great Hall. He had a feeling Maeve was not going to rise from her bed without struggle this morning. He wondered if she would miss class, even. The thought worried him, but also provided a twinge of relief, as he wasn’t quite eager to be face to face with her right now. The effects of his feelings for Maeve finally being brought to the surface left him completely unsure of how he should act around her. For some reason, the idea interacting with her as he normally did seemed completely impossible. He walked into the Great Hall staring lazily toward the stone floor. He was exhausted, and he could practically feel the weight of his eye bags weighing him down. Now that he was up and moving, he was becoming entirely aware of how little rest he had actually gotten last night.
“You look awful.”
Garreth’s head snapped up as he approached his usual spot at the Gryffindor table, completely shocked to hear Maeve’s voice. He hadn’t been paying attention as he walked over, and did not at all anticipate any of his friends to be here yet, especially Maeve. Yet, there she sat, offering him a half-hearted but sarcastic smile. Her eyes were definitely puffy and she looked like she also had poor sleep. But, she was here, and she was talking to him, and that was a lot more than Garreth had expected. He swallowed deeply, sitting down on the bench next to her as he always did. The moment he made eye contact with Natty across the table, he felt like he was under a spotlight. He wasn’t sure how he was going to survive more than a few sentences knowing that Natty could be analyzing everything he said to Maeve with the knowledge that he had feelings for her. Saoirse sat to Natty’s right - did she know, too?
“Garreth? I said that you look awful.” Maeve repeated, making him aware that he just had been sitting there silent since his arrival.
“Well, I’m channeling my inner Sallow. What do you think?” He responded. Where did that come from? Luckily, Maeve chuckled slightly. Garreth didn’t dare look to Natty for her reaction. He did, however, look over toward the Slytherin table. He searched for Sebastian, finding him after a moment not at the Slytherin table but standing up near the faculty table with Charity and his aunt.
With a loud clearing of his throat into the microphone, Headmaster Black captured the student body's attention. “Students, please, quiet down! Headmistress Weasley is going to be making an announcement.”
His aunt went on to again congratulate the two champions, our All-Slytherin team. Oh Merlin, Garreth hadn’t put it together before that Charity and Sebastian were both Slytherins, but he was now secretly rooting for them to be eliminated earlier on so he didn’t have to suffer through that whole house insufferably gloating for very long. She also went on to describe when and where the rounds will take place, and how students could attend. Garreth wasn’t listening to any of it. Instead, he was focused on Maeve’s reaction.
She wasn’t shying away from the announcement. She sat up straight, eyes trained on the podium, and even clapped along with other students as Sebastian and Charity were recognized. Garreth didn’t know why he was so convinced that Maeve would completely fall apart at losing the competition. Were his expectations for her really that low? Did she not prove her ability to get through adversity to him? He should have never doubted her - she was the most impressive person he knew. Of course she would get through this too.
He felt a pang in his chest at the realization that while Maeve was currently a true Gryffindor - being brave in the face of uncomfortable situations - he was not. At the vaguest mention of his feelings for Maeve, he feels completely consumed. Shouldn’t he, a Gryffindor, be able to face his feelings head on? Maybe he was sorted into the house because he was a bumbling git instead of for his bravery.
Classes that day went by quickly. He made an effort of sitting with Leander in most classes so he could take a break from wondering if Natty was overanalyzing everything he said to Maeve, or every look he gave her. As a further attempt to get some space from figuring out how his friendship with Maeve was going to look, he escaped to the empty potions classroom after his last class of the day.
Usually for the first while in the potions classroom he flip through his notebook and look at all of the different recipes, going back and forth on what he should brew. Right now, he didn’t even bother to take it out. He knew exactly what he wanted to make - Maxima potions. Though he was not a dueler, there was nothing more cathartic than taking a Maxima potion and letting a dueling mannequin have it. Today, desperate times called for desperate measures.
Garreth reached into his ingredients bag, and frowned as he realized he was out of spider fang. He cursed himself as he remembered telling himself to purchase more, which he evidently forgot to do. He wouldn’t let this stop him though, as he felt determined to stick to his plan of casting an unrelenting series of Confringo at the mannequin under the enhancement of a Maxima potion. Luckily, Garreth was not above stealing. With a careful scan of the classroom for any sign of Professor Sharp still hanging around, Garreth called the coast clear and cast Alohomora on the lock to his office. The layout of ingredients in the office was too familiar to Garreth, and he headed straight for the spider fang. “Oh, Merlin.” he growled as he realized that Professor Sharp, too, was out of the ingredient. Could this day get any worse?
Garreth couldn’t help but notice the jar directly next to the spider fang, usually containing leech juice, was also empty. That didn’t make any sense, because only yesterday morning Garreth took leech juice from Professor Sharp’s office while experimenting with a variation on a Thunderbrew potion, and there were still several portions left. Since it was a Sunday, Professor Sharp wouldn’t have used them for a class. Perhaps he was brewing potions for another purpose, but that didn’t make much sense, because this classroom was always empty whenever Garreth came on the weekends. But Garreth was certain of one thing - somebody else brewed a Maxima potion yesterday.