The Butterfly Effect

Two weeks into August, Dumbledore summoned the Golden Trio along with Draco to the study in Grimmauld Place. Draco barely considered what could possibly be so urgent as he fell into step beside Hermione as she chattered on about some Muggle book she’d started reading. She was flushed with happiness and sunshine from her holiday and undoubtedly her idiotic boyfriend, Ronald.

They somehow, made a perfect match for each other. Ron balanced out Hermione’s anxiety and she invigorated him to do and be better (something which he desperately needed in Draco’s opinion). It was nice to see both of them so happy, after years of torturing everyone in their vicinity to absolute insanity with their pointless bickering.

“You’re almost as terrible when you’re ranting about Quidditch scores. Most of the time, I just want to kiss you to shut you up," Harry muttered into his ear, breath hot against his skin.

He ducked away laughing before he could catch Draco’s smack. Harry had been doing this on and off for the past month, teasing him when he thought nobody was looking. They'd decided not to mention their blossoming relationship to any of their friends yet, wanting to keep it just between the two of them for the moment. Even so, Draco suspected that they already knew. 

With what was perhaps his dozenth wink, Harry turned to wrangle Ron into a competition to see who could make it to the study the fastest leaving Draco staring after him as the two of them set off running and shoving at one another. Sometimes he wondered why he even liked the utter idiot.

Hermione was staring after the two boys with a similar expression of fondness, “Have you two finally stopped playing oblivious and got together then ?”

Draco gave her a look. Hermione was becoming an utter gossip now that she'd been recruited into Pansy's forces. 

“Maybe. Maybe not." 

“Good,” she grinned again, radiance sparking off of her, “both of you deserve to be happy.”

He offered her a smile as they drew to a halt beside a panting Harry and Ron.

“I won,” Harry immediately declared as he spotted the two of them.

“Good for you,” rolling his eyes, Draco reached over to rap his knuckles against the door when it was abruptly pulled open, leaving his hand hanging in the air. Snape stood in front of him, mouth pulling into a frown.

“You lot are late. Come in, Dumbledore hasn’t got all day.”

They filed into the room, mirth quickly loosing it’s hold upon all of them. Dumbledore had his back to them, staring at the blank wall. Snape cleared his throat pointedly as he shut the door behind them with a soft click.

Their Headmaster turned around smiling but there was something strained about it that immediately had Draco’s guard rising. He found himself almost shrinking back into the comfort of Hermione at one side and Harry at the other.

“Harry, Draco, Hermione, Ron,” Dumbledore said giving them each a nod of greeting. “Fine holidays ?”

They all stared at the old man in silence until Draco prodded Harry sharply in the back. It was a given really that Dumbledore cared more about his answer than any of theirs.

“Fine Sir,” Harry said, voice stilted. He was still angry at how little Dumbledore seemed to care about Sirius and his predicament. “And yours ?”

“Busy, Harry, busy.”

With a world weary sigh, he settled himself into a chair, “I come to you lot with a bit of a dilemma, I must admit. What do you know of Theodore Nott ?”

Hermione ever the genius, already had an answer on her tongue, “He’s a Slytherin, Sir. Same year as us. He’s rather quiet, from what I’ve seen.”

“His father is a Death Eater,” Harry interjected with a frown.

“Indeed,” Dumbledore turned his gaze onto Draco who hadn’t uttered so much as a word since they’d entered the study. “Are you acquainted with Theodore, Mr. Malfoy ?”

“Somewhat,” Draco admitted, as all eyes turned to him in the room. “We share a dormitory, sometimes I help him with his Potions work.”

Dumbledore nodded sagely, turning his attention to Snape who was still hovering at the door, “See Severus, the boys know one another, it wouldn’t be too big of a leap.”

Snape inclined his head, even as his face soured further, “Very well.”

“Too big of a leap for what ?” Harry asked, voice suddenly loud and harsh. His hand shot out to grip at Draco’s wrist, almost painfully tight.

Draco felt almost frozen, watching the events roll out because he knew where it was headed and he knew what his answer would be. It was as if fate had been leading him to this path all along.

“Severus informed me that the Nott boy has taken the Mark over the summer. The Dark Lord has tasked him with a mission. We do not have information about what this specific mission requires. Professor Snape has been trying to get Theodore to tell him what it is but the boy has been tight lipped. We think he wouldn’t be as weary if someone close to him, a peer perhaps, fished for information. Severus has talked to your father and Lucius has agreed that you can be allowed to visit the Manor for the next two weeks. You can befriend Theodore and extract his mission.”

“So what, you want Draco to spy at the Manor where Voldemort is currently living ?”

“If Draco is inclined to help us, yes.”

“Absolutely not!” Harry snapped out, his hand was squeezing him tightly enough that Draco was certain bruises would bloom on his skin come tomorrow. “Find someone else, Draco isn’t—he’s not your—”

“Perhaps you should let Malfoy answer for himself, Potter,” Snape barked out, as his gaze swivelled to pierce Draco. “Your choice, Draco.”

Harry turned his gaze to him and the pleading in them was almost too much to bare, “You don’t have to. Say no. Please, please say no. I can’t bare the thought of you being in that place. What if they find out that you’re spying, what if they kill you ? Please, Draco.”

But that was the problem, Draco did have to. No matter how much Harry and their friends had accepted him, he never ever felt as if it were enough. Sure, Draco had apologized to them but it never felt adequate. Now he could help them and show that he was worth it, worth having Harry. Now he had a chance to fix something. He had a chance to be truly good for once, a chance to help the Light Side.

“Harry,” he said quietly, his voice barely more than a whisper and the other boy’s face shuttered.

“Don’t,” was all he said.

“I have to,” Draco returned and reached over to pry Harry’s fingers from his wrist. “Who if not me ? I’m the only connection you have to Theo.”

“I’ll never forgive you.”

Draco stopped, looked up into Harry’s hardened face. Here he was losing Harry before they ever had any chance at all. Barely more than a month of having him and now he would lose him. It seemed silly to put a barely there relationship over the good of the wizarding world. He would be selfish if he chose Harry, he'd be all his worst fears come to life.

Draco glanced towards Hermione. He knew that she above all others would understand. Hermione who sacrificed and did everything she could to keep them safe, and more so than that happy, year after year. She never complained, never said a word about it. She did what had to done.

Eyes watering, the bushy haired girl nodded slightly.

He steeled himself, “Your forgiveness seems a small price to pay, Potter.”

Harry paled, hand dropping out of his. For a second it looked like he wanted to strangle Draco.

“That’s your decision then ? You choose this war, over us ? Over me ? You would sacrifice this, maybe your life so that fucking Dumbledore has insider information?"

He nodded.

Face blank, the other boy gave him a last lingering glance and then stormed out the study banging the door behind him.

“He’ll come around,” Weasley said into the silence that settled over the room. “Just give him time to cool off, mate.”

“Never mind, that now,” forcing himself to smile, he glanced towards Dumbledore and Snape. “Lets hear the master plan then. I’d love to hear how we’re going to convince the Dark Lord not to smite me the second I set foot in the Manor.”

~~~~~

Harry almost trampled onto Narcissa Malfoy as he slammed out the study. She was slumped against the wall, crying quietly into her hands. For a second, Harry wasn’t certain if he should stay or leave her to her misery.

But then she glanced up, eyes zeroing in on him, “Chosen to go back, has he ?”

He nodded mutely. The older woman’s face crumpled and she looked as if she would burst into tears again but she took a steading breath and nodded.

“You can’t thwart destiny, can you ? Draco was meant for Malfoy Manor and the Dark Lord either way. If you hadn’t befriended Draco and convinced him to move Grimmauld, we’d still be in that Manor. I’m not particularly strong or brave by conventional standards, Mr. Potter and I hardly care about the war. So I would’ve stayed because it would’ve been easy. And the Dark Lord would’ve found my son even then, especially then.”

“I’m sorry,” Harry said desperately, because if he hadn’t brought them here maybe Draco could’ve avoided this fate. Maybe there wouldn’t be another mother mourning her child being shoved into the war.

“It is not your fault. The Blacks are cursed to live a life of suffering. One sister insane, the other disowned and refusing to speak to me even now, not that I blame her. Regulus, dead and his body lost somewhere, Merlin knows where. Sirius, stuck in lobo. It seems Draco is just following after the rest of his ancestors.”

Harry gave her a desperate, pleading look, “It doesn’t have to be like that, the cycle can break. Can’t you convince him ? He’ll listen to you.”

Narcissa smiled, bitterly and pushed herself off from the ground, “Albus has the extraordinary talent of convincing someone that there is no other way but his way. A useful talent but one that has been doled out quite unfairly onto my son. I suppose that’s what I get for thinking it’d be any different on this side of the war. We’re just little pawns shifted around at the hands of powerful men. I am sorry too. You are perhaps Albus’s most powerful pawn and use you, he will. I wish life had been different for you. You deserve to be just a child not the saviour of the wizarding world."

“I wish life had been different for all of us,” Harry returned, thinking with a pang of his parents, his godfather, Remus and his own friends, far too young to handle any of this.

She turned towards the door, ready to go but Harry blurted out, “I think, I—I love him.”

Narcissa turned around, eyes wide.

“I know it must seem like it’s all very sudden but I’ve known Draco since I started at Hogwarts, I knew him before I even set foot on that train. The first three years were disastrous,” he stopped to grin and rake his hands through his hair, “but I knew it was coming from that second I saw him in that lake. He was important to me before I ever even had him and I tried to change it. Shoved the feelings aside. Tried to date someone else. Tried to be his friend and just that for two bloody years.

“Then what happened at the Ministry happened and when I saw that spell coming towards him, I felt my own heart stop. I wouldn’t have been able to carry on without him. I need him. This war has already taken so much from me and it can't take Draco as well. When he agreed to put himself into harm's way, I felt like my heart was caving in. Just once I wanted something to be mine, and just mine but—"

She reached out and gently swiped the tear that trailed down his cheek. Her eyes were surprisingly warm and comforting, “I know Draco better than anyone in the world, Harry. I know that he’s entirely too guarded and can’t ever communicate what he wants for fear of not getting it but he loves. Truly and sincerely. And I know without a single doubt that he loves you. The only reason he’s willing to make such a sacrifice is because of you. No one can avoid the nasty bits of life, no matter how much we try to love or protect them from it. All will be well again, have no fear.”

Then with a final smile at Harry, she rapped her knuckles against the study door and went inside.