On Begged and Borrowed Time

And now I'm covered in you

And I'm covered in you

Late September, 1976

When James wakes up on Saturday and looks out his window, the grounds outside are covered in a gloomy blanket of clouds, the threat of storms clearly imminent.

“Buggering hell!” He nearly shouts. The quidditch game is hours away and this is not ideal weather for flying. 

“James,” Remus croaks from his four-poster, “I swear to God, if you don’t shut up I’m going to kill you. Like actually kill you.” 

“Sorry, Moony.” James grimaces, and he makes his way downstairs with his broom and quidditch bag. He sits down in the empty common room, pulling his broom across his lap and begins to polish it before he has to go down for breakfast. 

His mind begins to wander, and he predictably winds up thinking about Regulus. He never did show up for rounds last night, and James didn’t mention it to Sirius out of fear of worrying him or violating Reg’s privacy, or something, so he really doesn’t know what the deal is. Lily said she didn’t know if it was a permanent change, so that comforted James, at least. Knowing all of this isn’t set in stone and might just be some random fluke. He’s going to ask Regulus about it the next time he sees him, best believe. Even if James was the kind of person who could keep himself from being nosey, he doubts he'd be able to resist with Regulus. He’s too all-consuming for James these days.

Just as he's packing up, the rest of the team slowly makes their way downstairs. It's a Gryffindor team tradition to eat together and walk to the stadium together, one that James has strong opinions about upholding.

After breakfast, they make their way to the pitch, James leading the way.

“Alright,” James says, looking at his team, “how are we feeling?” As if on cue, a roll of thunder bangs out above them.

“Just peachy, James!” Alice responds, sarcasm dripping from her words.

“Yeah, wonderful weather we're having, don't you think?” Marlene says, trying to hold in her laughter.

“Give him a break,” Frank warns the girls. “James Potter may be capable of many things, but controlling the weather isn't one of them.”

“Thanks, Frank,” James mutters, rubbing the back of his neck. He watches the clouds. Focusing on the team, he clears his throat.

“Okay, I know this isn't ideal for our first game, but we've flown in weather like this before. It doesn't mean anything. We all know the water repellent spells, and if we need them we can use the goggles in the equipment closet.” He pauses, taking in the unimpressed faces looking back at him. “I believe in you guys, okay? Games are never easy and there's always going to be something that goes wrong, but this isn't something we can't handle.”

There's a general mumbling of agreement among his players and he relaxes slightly. “Before we get changed and head out, is there anything anyone wants to say? Any pointers or concerns?”

“No jokes, Alice.” Frank says. Alice, who was starting to open her mouth, closes it and rolls her eyes.

“Well, Frankie, if you had actually let me speak you'd know that I wasn't going to take the piss out of James this time.” She directs her gaze to James. “Listen, I know I'm a good flier and a half decent seeker, alright, so this isn't me asking for a motivational speech. But, I can't shake the feeling that Regulus Black is going to pull something funny on me. He's an excellent seeker and probably the best flier in his year, if not all of Hogwarts. He’s also a bit of a cad.” 

There's silence, and a few of the team members raise their eyebrows at Alice’s comment, including James, Marlene, and Frank.  

“Oh hell, really?" Alice looks at them and sighs, rolling her eyes again. "Okay, the best besides all of you. What I meant in saying that is that I'm going to need some help. I need everyone's eyes on Black when they have the chance. It's hard enough to see the snitch, but in this weather it'll be close to impossible.”

James nods in agreement. “Alice is right. Regulus is the best player on his team. The others, well they've got the fast brooms and all, but the skill is lacking. Regulus has both. We've all got to watch him this game if we want to win.”

“Don't forget about Barty Crouch,” Frank adds. “He’s off his rocker, that one. Exceptionally good beater though, and he likes to play dirty.”

“Not to mention he seems to be Regulus’ best friend,” Marlene chimes in, looking thoughtful. “He'll be looking to protect him in particular, probably take it personally if we mess with Black at all. Bloody psycho.”

With that in mind, they head to the changing rooms. When they emerge, Madame Hooch is standing on the pitch, waiting to blow her whistle and start the game. The two teams line her on both sides, the two captains standing in front.

“Alright, lads. Shake hands and we’ll get this going,” Hooch announces. “No funny business. I don't want a dirty game today.”

James steps forward, shaking Percy Parkinson’s hand. 

“Ready to play, Potter?” He grins.

“Always, Parkinson,” James responds with a wide smile.

Over Parkinson’s shoulder, James sees Regulus in his quidditch kit, broom in hand. When their eyes meet, Reg doesn't look away. His green kit brings out his eyes and James smiles dopily, but he doesn't get one in return. Instead, Regulus’ mouth is set into a line as he raises his head higher, rolling his shoulders back. He doesn't even blush. James feels his heart sink.

“Mount your brooms,” Hooch says, blowing the whistle. With that, they all kick off into the air.

-

“Crouch, you fucking wanker!” James shouts, as a bludger nearly takes Marlene’s head off. “Did you not hear Hooch say no dirty plays?!”

Barty just laughs, the noise getting swallowed by the heavy winds whipping through the air around them.

“I'm good, James!” Marlene says, flying over to him. “The game? Not so much.”

She's right. The game is a mess. The weather conditions are pure shit and Slytherin has the lead by a few points, playing especially dirty to achieve it. 

“Just stay focused, McKinnon. Keep an eye on Regulus, if he catches the snitch we’re completely fucked. We might be anyway, but...”

“I have been, but he hasn't moved the entire game! He’s just sitting up there like a bloody gargoyle on his broom!” She nods upwards, gesturing to Regulus with her chin. James looks, his heart catching in his chest. Gargoyle isn't really the word he'd use to describe how Regulus looks up there, the wind tousling his curls and his cheeks flushed pink from cold. No, James probably would say something else.

He sighs, “Just keep watching. He could see the snitch at any time and he'll move fast. We need Alice to be ready.”

Marlene salutes him, flying away to rejoin the game. James follows. 

He leans forward and zooms away, catching the quaffle in a pass from Frank. Moving quickly in between the Slytherin players, he scores a goal. The teams are tied now. 77 to 77. The stadium erupts in cheers. He flies over the crowd, taking it all in. He wouldn't say it out loud, but this might be his favorite part of the game. The attention, that is. 

“James!” Frank yells over the crowd and James turns quickly, seeing Regulus flying down from his spot above the pitch, leaning flat against his broom as he picks up his speed. 

As Regulus gets closer, he weaves in and out of players effortlessly, narrowly missing bludgers as Meadowes and Flint flank him. To his left, Alice emerges. The snitch just metres from the two of them. 

James and Frank fly after her, attempting to cover her from any Slytherin players. She and Regulus are both gaining speed, their hands outstretched. For a second, it looks like Alice has got it, until a bludger comes flying from ahead of her, nailing her in the shoulder. She topples off her broom, dangling in midair by one hand as she yells out in pain.

“Crouch!” Frank bellows, his face red. “You're bloody lucky that didn’t get her in the head!”

Barty smiles sweetly, spinning his beater’s bat in his hand. “Sorry, Longbottom. My hand just slipped when I saw her. I was aiming for you.” Frank flies forward, enraged, when the crowd goes wild. The two of them swivel around on their brooms, and Crouch lets out a delighted shout. Regulus has caught the snitch. 

“Better luck next time, Potter!” Meadowes taunts, laughing.

James curses as the whistle blows, making his way to the ground. 

Once he lands, James sees Regulus dismount his broom, attempting to suppress a smile. Reg holds the snitch above his head and his face breaks into a grin. A real, uncontrollable one, his eyes shining with excitement as he laughs. His teammates rush forward, crashing into him with so much force that they almost topple over. Dorcas Meadowes pulls him into her chest, beaming and mussing his hair and Barty yells out, jumping on top of them as they roll to the ground.

Maybe losing every once in a while isn't too bad, James thinks to himself, watching Regulus laugh from the grass.

“Why in Merlin’s Beard are you smiling right now, James Potter?” Alice growls, her face hot with anger. “Did we play the same game?!”

James’ eyes widen and his cheeks flush, not even realizing the stupid grin he had on his face. He shrugs, playing it off with a laugh. “Just imagining the ways we'll obliterate them next time, Prewett.” He looks her up and down. “How’s your shoulder?”

“Fine, just some bad bruising.” She mutters. “But Crouch has got something coming if he thinks I'll forget about that little play.”

“‘Atta girl,” James says, putting his arm around her. “I love it when you plot your revenge in front of me.”

Alice glares at him before smiling. “I don't care if we lost,  I need a drink after that. Why not throw a party anyway?”

James roars with laughter, agreeing with her. "You should be the poster child for Gryffindor, Alice." She laughs and pulling away from him, and jogs off to speak with Marlene.

Now that the game has been over for a few minutes, people have begun to make their way onto the stands, milling about as they try to find their friends or congratulate the winning team. 

Sirius, Remus, and Peter come running towards him, slightly out of breath.

“James, mate,” Sirius pants. “I don't mean to rub it in, but did you see that?! Regulus is a fucking star!”

“Literally.” Remus laughs a little.

“Are you okay, James?” Peter asks, his eyebrows pulled together. “Slytherin was always going to be the toughest one. You don't have a thing to worry about with the other houses.”

James smiles, running a hand through his windswept hair.

“Yeah, Pete, I'm fine.” He gives Sirius a look. “And yeah, mate, I know. We all knew it was going to be him if we lost.”

Sirius can't help but smile, obviously buzzing with the excitement of watching his little brother win. “I think I'm gonna go congratulate him. Wanna come?”

The four of them walk towards Regulus. He's standing on the field, snitch in hand, chatting with Malfoy, Crouch, and Rosier. He still has a smile playing on his lips.

“Reggie!” Sirius bellows, racing towards him. “You were bloody brilliant!”

Regulus blinks, taking Sirius in, before smiling slightly at him. “Yeah, yeah. Thanks, Sirius.”

“Oh, c'mon you little twat! Don't you ever get excited?” Sirius remarks, pulling him into a hug. Regulus stiffens at first, but then he relaxes into the hug, gingerly placing his arms around Sirius as he closes his eyes. James bites back a smile.

“You were amazing out there, Reg,” James says.

Regulus’ eyes pop open, landing on James. He pulls back from Sirius, straightening up and turning red. Ah, James thinks, there he is. 

“Thanks, James,” Regulus says quietly, not quite meeting his eyes. “You have a great team.” 

The Malfoy girl lets out a loud laugh, quickly smacking a hand to cover her mouth. Rosier laughs a little bit too, and Crouch looks between the group of them, before cackling himself, throwing his head back. 

“A great team,” He says, pretending to wipe tears from his eyes, “Reg, you’re a quidditch star and a comedian today.”

Regulus shoots him a look, “Watch it, Barty.”

“Ugh, why do you have to be noble these days?” Crouch rolls his eyes, “There’s no harm in a little bit of chatting shit, is there, Potter?”

Sirius looks to James, narrowing his eyes at Crouch’s words. Fight? He seems to ask. James shakes his head. “None at all, Crouch. All in the spirit of the game, yeah? Though, I'd prefer if you didn't try to behead my players with bludgers.”

Barty smiles cruelly, tipping his head to the side, “Yeah, Potter. That’s all it is, the spirit of the game. It's not like there’s anything else you've done worth chatting shit about, is there?”

James freezes, looking from Barty to Regulus, who still isn't meeting his eye. Just as he’s about to respond, a pair of arms wrap around him. Regulus’ friends and Remus and Pete seem to scatter.

“There are my boys!” 

“Mum!” James shouts, hugging her back. She's wearing a Gryffindor scarf with dark grey robes and has snake shaped earrings in her ears. James smiles, feeling his heart swell at the idea of his mum picking it all out with he and Regulus in mind.

“Hi, sweetheart. You did a great job today, don't get down on yourself,” She says, pushing his hair out of his face.

“I won't, mum. It was a fair win,” James' mum presses a kiss to his cheek, turning to look at Regulus and Sirius, James still in her arms.

“Regulus, that was some quality flying out there. You could play professionally in a few years,” Fleamont says, smiling at him proudly.

“Oh, yes, Regulus, love, you were great!” Her eyes twinkle as Regulus looks down, a smile playing on his lips. “Sirius, darling, come here. Oh, all three of you get over here. I've missed you dearly.” She pulls Regulus and Sirius into the hug as well, the four of them squishing together.

“Effie, give them some space. Let them see their friends. I'm sure Regulus has a party in his honor waiting for him,” Monty laughs.

“Oh, alright. Off you go then. I love you, boys,” She says, looking at the three of them. “We can't wait for you to come home for the Christmas holidays.”

They give their goodbyes to James’ parents and then it's just the three of them. They stand in silence for a moment, Regulus looking particularly awkward.

“Reg, seriously, that was brilliant,” Sirius says again. “We need to fly together at James’ over Christmas.” 

Regulus nods and then there's a shout of Sirius’ name from across the pitch. Remus is gesturing for him to join them.

“Moony, always so impatient,” Sirius grins. “Alright, I'd better catch up with him and Pete. Prongs, you coming?”

James hesitates. He should probably go with Sirius, but Reg is right there and he doesn't know when he’ll get him on his own again before Monday, if he even comes to rounds on Monday. He doesn't want to wait that long. 

“No, you go on. I'll meet you at the tower. I want to ask Reg about some plays.” Sirius nods and James watches as he runs off towards Remus, his long curls blowing in the wind. He turns back to Regulus.

“Hi, Reg,” He smiles, feeling a little bit nervous.

“Hi, James,” Regulus responds sheepishly, looking up at him.

“You weren't at rounds yesterday,” James says. “Did you- I mean… Why weren't you there?”

Regulus looks surprised. “Oh. No, I wasn't. I had to meet with a professor.” He pauses. “Sorry, I didn't tell you. I didn't think you'd mind. I'll be there on Monday.”

“I minded, a bit, I suppose.” James laughs, running his hand through his hair nervously.

“Oh,” Regulus repeats, his eyes cast down again.

James feels awkward. He's never really felt awkward around Regulus. Out of his depth sure, but never uncomfortable. 

“Er- listen,” James starts, and Regulus’ head pops up, concern lining his face, “I know you're probably going to a party with the Slytherins, but erm, if you want, you should come by the Gryffindor common room. We're having a party, I think. At least, that's what Alice told me. So, if you want to come then you should come. Yeah, you should come. It would be fun, I think.” James rambles, running that damn hand through his hair again.

Regulus is looking at him curiously, biting his lip. Silence stretches between them and James starts to panic a little bit, but then Reg says, “Yeah, okay.”

“Okay?” James questions, incredulous.

“Okay,” Regulus repeats. “I'll try to come. Can I bring my friends if they want to go?”

“Oh! Yeah! Of course, bring anyone you want!” James says quickly, “Er- actually, not anyone because, no offense, a lot of your housemates are pricks, but yeah, bring your friends. The password is 'Candy Floss’.”

Regulus laughs slightly, just a huff of air through his nose, “Noted. I'll see you, James.”

“See you,” James responds quietly, watching Regulus walk away.

-

“You're going to a Gryffindor party? After we just annihilated them?” Barty groans, falling back onto his bed. “We've really lost him haven't we, Ev?” It’s the evening now, and the Slytherin and Gryffindor parties are both in full swing.

Evan is watching Barty from the corner of the boy’s dormitory, his arms crossed as he leans against the wall. “He’s a lost cause, really.” Evan says, his eyes lingering on the strip of skin above Barty’s belt where his shirt has ridden up. “Nothing we can do but say our goodbyes at this point.”

Regulus scoffs, “I didn't say I was going. I just said he invited me. He invited you guys, too, but you seemed to ignore that.”

“Reg, I love you, but do you really think I'm stepping foot in a Gryffindor party?” Barty says, looking up from his spot on the bed, “I mean really, we just played one of the best games we’ve had and you want to go to a party at the losing team’s dorm?”

“You know, Reg,” Evan offers. “It’s kind of like a metaphor for the war. The Dark Lord is winning and yet you still left your family’s house and chose the other side. Now, you can party with the winning quidditch team, but you're going to go to the Gryffindor common room instead. It's all rather tragic when you think about it.”

“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Regulus groans. “What are you on about right now? And I haven't chosen any sides.”

Pandora hums from the floor, out of sight. 

Barty laughs, “He's kind of right, Reggie. Although, I don't know that metaphor is the right word for it, Ev. I think it's more like a parallel. Maybe a pattern.”

Regulus gives him a flat look, “Really, Barty? You too?”

Barty laughs again and rolls over so that he's sitting on his bed looking directly at Regulus. “I’m just teasing. Ev sounds mad. Actually,” Barty pauses, “he sounds a bit like Pandora.”

“Shove off!” Evan says, laughing.

“Hey! You say that like it’s a bad thing!” Pandora shouts, popping up from the spot where she was lying.

“Anyway…” Barty drawls, pulling a face. “What I was going to say before I was so rudely interrupted is that I'm teasing. Go to the party, Reg. Have some fun. Get your celebratory shag from James Potter. But at least have a few drinks with us first.”

“What?! Who said anything about shagging?” Regulus splutters, his eyes blown wide, looking back and forth at the three of them. Evan sighs as if Regulus is being especially thick.

“Regulus, I've known you since we were five. You know I can pick up on stuff too, right?” Barty responds, rolling his eyes. “I haven't seen you blush that hard around a guy since that bloke from Hufflepuff complimented your ring in third year. What was his name again?”

“Amos Diggory,” Pandora supplies.

“Yeah, Diggory. I mean I don't care that you're gay, Reg, but a Hufflepuff, really? I'd much prefer you to shag James Potter. Go get ‘em, tiger, or whatever Gryffindors say,” Barty says, causing Evan to snicker and Barty looks to him, flashing a grin. 

“You're being ridiculous.” Regulus shakes his head. “I mean just because I- just because James and I are friendly now doesn't mean we’re going to shag. He’s in love with Evans.”

“So you admit that you want to shag James Potter?” Evan catches. “But Evans is an obstacle?”

“That is not what I said,” Regulus hisses. 

“You didn't have to, mate,” Barty tells him. “And if you're worried about James being into Lily, I don't think you need to be. I haven't seen him directing any public proposals or other obnoxious displays of affection towards her since last year. I also caught him looking at you in the Great Hall the other day with a stupid look on his face.”

“I saw him looking at you on the first day of term, just before the sorting,” Pandora chimes in. “He was smiling at you. Rather fondly, I might add.”

“Dorcas told me he was staring all moon-eyed at you before the game started- when he was shaking Percy’s hand,” Evan says, giving him a knowing look.

Regulus flushes, his face getting hot as a pang of nervous excitement bubbles in his chest. “None of that means anything. James isn't-- he doesn't think of me that way.” He responds, his voice higher than he'd like it to be.

“Suit yourself, Reg, but I think you should go, even if you don't shag him,” Barty says.

“I think you should go too. Maybe you'll have fun,” Pandora nods. “Perhaps you'll spend some time with Sirius?”

Evan groans. “Okay, enough arguing over this. Regulus, just go. I need you stay at the Slytherin party for at least an hour though.”

“Yeah, you have to stay for a bit. You need a drink after that game, and after last night with Dumbledore,” Barty adds. “What happened, anyway? Someone” he glares at Pandora, “said we needed to give you space.”

Regulus sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Now is not the time, Barty. Get me a drink.”

-

Regulus isn't sure how much time has passed, but he’s three drinks in and feeling rather pleasantly tipsy. The heat of the firewhiskey he's been drinking has settled into his body, making him feel cozy. An easy smile rests on his face.

“Barty!” He whispers-yells over the noise of the party. “Should I really go?”

Barty is just a few metres away and looks up from his conversation with Evan. He smirks as he looks Regulus up and down. “Yeah, mate, you should.” He turns around and grabs a goblet off of a table near him. He points his wand at it. “Aguamenti. There,” he says, handing it to Regulus. “Drink this and then go.”

Regulus accepts the water gratefully, drinking it quickly. Some of it dribbles down his chin and onto his clothes. He looks down at it, yelping in concern, and Evan laughs at him. “Go, Reg. Have your fun.”

Regulus looks up at him, still dabbing the spot where the water got on his jumper. He stops. “Yeah, you're right. I should go.”

With that, he grabs his wand off of the sofa and leaves, making his way to Gryffindor Tower.

-

Regulus has stood outside of the Gryffindor common room a few times during his time at Hogwarts. Each time before this, though, he was contemplating trying to get in to talk to Sirius. This time, he has the password and isn't looking for his brother. He's looking for James.

The Fat Lady is watching him suspiciously. “Well? Are you going to give me the password or will I have to stay awake all night waiting for you to speak?”

God, Regulus thinks, rolling his eyes at her, Even the Gryffindor portrait is annoying.

“Candy Floss,” Regulus tells her, and she swings open, the door to the common room revealing itself behind her.

There’s loud music playing, but it's nothing Regulus recognizes and he’s pretty sure it’s Muggle based on the sound of it. The party is packed tight, Gryffindor banners hanging from the ceiling and bursts of Filibuster's Fireworks popping above people’s heads. He doesn’t recognize anyone, and quite suddenly, he feels rather stupid for thinking he could come to this party and be fine.

“Go on then!” The Fat Lady shouts at him, sighing exasperatedly. “I haven’t got all night!”

Regulus hesitates one last time before climbing through the portrait hole. When he enters, the door slams shut and he stands pressed against it, the pleasant buzz he had turning to a slow panic. He looks around the room, praying he’ll spot James or Sirius. Fuck, he’ll even take Lupin at this point. Maybe Pettigrew if he gets really desperate.

A firework goes off directly above Regulus’ head and he flinches, scrambling to get away. As he does, he bumps into someone. “Regulus?” the voice asks, disbelieving. “Is that you?”

When he looks up, he sees a pair of startling green eyes framed by red fringe. “Evans,” He responds, straightening his back and fixing his face into a scowl, “Hi.” 

Lily raises her eyebrows at him. “What are you doing here?”

Regulus raises an eyebrow back. “Am I not welcome?”

Her eyebrows furrow as she moves her eyes across his face, “That’s not what I said and I didn’t mean it like that, so there’s no need to get snippy.” She crosses her arms. “Are you looking for Sirius? He and Remus just slipped out."

“I’m looking for James,” He grits out, wishing she would stop talking. He doesn’t even know why he’s so irritated by her. I mean, he knows, but he really doesn’t have anything against Lily. Some jealousy, sure, but otherwise no. 

“Oh!” Lily gasps, smacking her palm against her forehead. “Duh! He told some of us that you might stop by. I think he and Pete ran down to the kitchens to get more food, they should be back any minute. Do you want a drink?”

Regulus eyes her warily. Does he want to accept anything from her? Not really, no, but he would like to have a drink. He sighs, grumbling stiffly, “Yes, that’d be great. Thank you.” 

Lily titters, “You’re really nothing like Sirius, are you?” She gestures to him over her shoulder. “C’mon, the punch is this way. Watch out, Alice and Mary made it, so it might kill you.”

Five minutes later, Regulus is sitting on an overstuffed sofa, cup of punch in hand. He’s in between Evans and MacDonald, and McKinnon is sitting on the arm of the couch. No one has spoken yet, and Regulus doesn’t plan on being first. He stares at the liquid in his cup, moving it back and forth slightly. It’s a radioactive green color, and Regulus can’t even begin to imagine what had to go into it to make it that way. 

“Sooo…” MacDonald sings, smiling at him and batting her eyelashes. She drags a finger down his arm. “Baby Black, tell us about yourself,” Regulus gulps down half of his punch, avoiding her eyes and the question.

“Mary, for Christ’s sake, leave him alone,” McKinnon groans. “Sorry, Black. Get some punch in her and she flirts with anyone. Don’t take it personally, it’s just a sport for her.”

“Hey!” Mary pouts, turning from Regulus to Marlene. “I flirt with everyone when I’m sober, too. And anyway, you’re not supposed to tell him that!”

Lily dissolves into giggles, smiling into her cup. “Mary,” she laughs. “You don’t want to break Sirius’ little brother’s heart with your games. I don’t know that you’d survive his wrath.”

Regulus chokes on his punch, coughing as he attempts to recover from it. McKinnon slaps him on the back with wide eyes, “I didn’t even think about that! Mary, you better quit it!”

Mary laughs, the glitter on her eyelids shimmering in the light as she closes them. “You two are such swots . I’m not doing anything! Just being friendly, that’s all.” She leans in towards Regulus, making his eyes cross. “You don’t mind, do you, little Reggie?” 

“He does, actually.” 

The four of them turn to find James standing in front of the couch, one hand on his hip and the other holding a massive bag of crisps. He’s scowling. Regulus doesn’t know if he’s ever seen James scowl before. It doesn’t really look right on his face, he’s meant to be smiling. He always smiles when he sees Regulus.

“James!” Lily exclaims. “I found Regulus being attacked by fireworks by the portrait hole! He told me he was looking for you, so I got him a drink.”

“Yeah, James. We just had him for safekeeping.” MacDonald claims sweetly.

James raises his eyebrows at her, unimpressed. He looks back to Evans, “Thanks, Lily.”

Finally, oh finally, he looks at Regulus. Immediately, his face breaks out into a wide smile. “Reg. You came.”

“I came,” Regulus flushes, the punch he drank setting in quickly. He feels so pleased by James’ reaction to him. So pleased. He can’t stop the small smile playing on lips.

“Come on, I need to grab a drink too. Are you hungry? Wormtail and I just got back from the kitchens.” James offers his hand, pulling Regulus up from his spot on the couch. Now, it might be the alcohol, but when their hands touch Regulus feels like he’s on fire. The heat of James’ touch rushes through his entire body, causing him to punch out a breath of air. When he looks up at him, James is just looking right back, still smiling.

“I didn’t even know they were friends,” McKinnon says loud enough for Regulus to hear her. He risks a glance at James, to see if he heard it too, if he's embarrassed by that, but he isn't. He’s smiling and waving to people as he passes them, leading Regulus through the crowd.

They wander over to the food and drinks table, and Regulus gets a glass of water, double-fisting that and his punch. He watches as James pours himself a tumbler of firewhisky.

“Are you having fun?” James asks, peering at Regulus through his eyelashes. He’s crouching on the ground now, putting the empty bottles underneath the table.

“I am now,” Regulus admits. He waits to feel embarrassed by that, but it doesn’t come.

“Oh, really?” James beams at him. “Me too.”

Regulus smiles back, a little nervously. He doesn’t really know what he’s doing, doesn’t know what’s happening right now. He likes it though, even if this is all it is between him and James. Small smiles and wide grins. Accidental touches and the heat of his cheeks flushing. It’s not enough, but it can be, he supposes. Regulus can make this work. Right now, in his slightly alcohol muddled brain, it’s more than enough. Bits and pieces of James that make Regulus feel special are much better than none at all.

“Do you want to see something?” James asks suddenly, straightening up. His eyes are wide and Regulus can feel his excitement coming off of him in waves.

“Sure,” Regulus responds without hesitation. 

“Brilliant!” James says, happily. “Let’s go up to my room.”

Regulus’ eyes just about pop out of his head. Was Barty right? Well, he wasn’t expecting it, but he probably won’t turn James down. “You want to show me your room?” Regulus questions, his voice disbelieving. 

James turns red, which you know, really serves him right, considering how often he causes Regulus to do the same. “No!” He splutters. “I mean, yes, but no, that’s not what I meant. I- I need to grab something before we leave. We have to leave for me to show you the actual thing.”

“Oh,” Regulus says, trying not to sound too disappointed. “Okay. Let’s grab it then.”

He follows James, who keeps running a hand through his hair as they make their way up the stairs to his dormitory. 

“Well, here it is,” James announces, spreading his arms out as if presenting the room to Regulus like a prized possession. “It’s not much, but it’s home.” He laughs.

Regulus stands in the doorway of the dorm awkwardly, casting a glance around it. It feels like he’s intruding, in a way. This isn’t just James’ room, but Sirius’ too. Regulus isn’t sure if his brother would want him to be here. Especially not with James. 

“It’s nice,” Regulus says tightly, not wanting to stay any longer than he has to. “What is it that you need to get?”

“Oh! Right,” James laughs again, dropping to the floor and digging around under his bed. “Aha! Here it is.”

When James rises from the floor, he holds up a bunch of silvery, almost transparent-looking fabric in his hand. It shimmers unnaturally in the low light of the dormitory.

Regulus gasps, stepping forward, “Is that an invisibility cloak? A real one?” He runs his knuckles along the fabric, marveling at the object. 

“Yeah,” James says, his eyes shining. “My dad gave it to me. It belonged to his dad before that, and it goes on. Pretty neat, isn’t it?”

Regulus shakes his head, his fingers still tracing the cloak. “James, this is more than neat, it’s- do you know how rare these are? Is this what you wanted me to see?”

“I have some idea of how rare they are,” James confesses with a smile, “but no, that’s not what I wanted to show you. We just need this to get there. Are you ready? We should put it on so we can slip out with anyone following us.”

“Where are we going?” Regulus asks James. He doesn’t really care, truthfully, he just wanted to ask. Right now, Regulus feels like James could go anywhere and he’d follow. He’s a little bit tipsy. He doesn’t think that’s the only reason he feels that way.

“You’ll see. You’ll like it, I promise.”

Regulus believes him.

-

James and Regulus are walking through the ground level corridor of Hogwarts together, shielded from prying eyes (and Filch and Mrs. Norris) by the cloak of invisibility. James has an arm lightly looped around Regulus, keeping him close so that the cloak covers the both of them. It’s an innocent touch, done for the purpose of their secrecy, but Regulus still relishes in it. The feather light touches of James' fingers on Regulus’ waist are causing his heart to pound. It’s getting to a point where he’s worried that James can hear it.

“Alright,” James whispers, letting go of Regulus and taking the cloak off of the two of them. “We’re here.”

Regulus looks at him flatly, raising an eyebrow. James has brought him to the one-eyed witch statue. “You wanted to show me the statue of this old hag?”

“No, Reg, just wait!” James says, laughing slightly. “Dissendium,” He casts, tapping his wand to the witch’s hump. The statue slides aside, scraping against the stone floor. In its place is a dark hole. Regulus can’t see where it leads. 

Regulus groans, “Why did you have to take me somewhere that looks like it might kill me? I thought you would take me somewhere pretty.”

James’ shoulders shake with silent laughter, “It’s not as bad as it looks, Reg. I promise you’re going to be fine. In fact, you’ll probably end up being happy.” He pauses. “And why would you assume I’d take you somewhere pretty, hm?” James’ eyes twinkle, just a hint of mischief visible beneath the fondness in them.

Regulus pinks slightly. “I don’t know,” He grumbles, “Taking someone somewhere pretty just seems like something you’d do.”

James laughs and tugs on his wrist, pulling him into the passage. “It’s a bit of a trek, unfortunately. It’s worth it though, I promise.”

Half an hour later, they’re still walking and Regulus’ buzz is completely gone. Like, so far gone he can't believe he ever had it. He can feel a headache coming on and he’s in the middle of grumbling to himself about the walk when James stops them in their tracks. There’s a wooden door with a dingy brass handle on it.

“Okay,” He turns to Regulus, “now we’re actually here.” James digs his hand into his pocket and pulls out a hair pin, fidgeting with the door. The lock clicks and he pushes it open, grabbing Regulus by the hand and pulling him forward.

When they step through the doorway, the smell of sweets hits Regulus like a pile of bricks. He looks around, and sees boxes upon boxes of different lollies and treats. 

“Where are we?” Regulus asks James, pulling his eyebrows together in confusion.

“Honeydukes cellar!” James answers excitedly. “Do you like it? I know you like sweets and there hasn’t been a Hogsmeade weekend yet, so…” He trails off. “I was going to bring you here on Friday during rounds, but then you weren’t there, and then I tried to get some madeira cake for you from the elves tonight, like you ate at my house all the time in the summer, remember? But they were fresh out. I figured this would do instead.” He rambles, running a hand through his hair with a looks of uncertainty on his face. “Do you like it? I realize now you probably could just order sweets, if you wanted them.”

Regulus looks around again, cataloging all of the different sweets in the room. Literally everything is back here. Regulus does like sweets quite a bit, and feels slightly flustered that James even noticed, or remembered, how much he enjoyed Mrs. Potter’s madeira cake. “It’s brilliant, really.” He lets out a loud laugh and glances back at James with a smile. “How did you find this?’

“Remus found it. Then we put it on the map.” James smiles, looking relieved.

“The map?” Regulus asks distractedly, beginning to walk around the cellar.

“Oh, erm, yeah, the map. Like, er, we put it in the map of our minds, I guess?” James stutters, the pitch of his voice rising into a question at the end. Regulus doesn’t care enough to interrogate him about it, so he just hums in response, grabbing a handful of fizzing whizzbees. 

“I do like sweets,” Regulus admits, “I’m surprised you noticed.”

“Of course I noticed.” James replies easily. “I always notice you.”

Regulus pauses then, setting his hand down on the box in front of him filled with chocolate frogs. He grips it tightly, his gaze set on James. “Do you really?”

“Yeah, Reg. Always.” He chuckles, running a hand through his hair and glancing up at the ceiling a moment before looking back at him. “It’s a bit annoying, really. I can’t stop noticing you. Can’t seem to get you out of my head.”

Regulus’ stomach does a flip at James’ words. He takes a shuddering breath, not looking away from him. “But why?”

“What?” James asks, slightly frowning. He clearly doesn’t understand what Regulus is asking.

“Why?” Regulus questions again. “Why can’t you stop noticing me? Why can’t you get me out of your head?”

James stares at him, unanswering, but Regulus doesn’t speak. He just waits. He needs James to answer this on his own. He needs to understand if what’s happening right now is really happening. 

Regulus felt it for a long time, long before James ever did, and long before he ever thought James could feel it too. Something changed, at least for Regulus, that day in the library at Potter Cottage, when James approached him. He had felt James’ eyes on him the rest of the afternoon, but he couldn’t bring himself to look. He felt his eyes on him often after that. He also felt a sense of hope bubbling in his gut, mixed with desire and affection and sunlight.

That was all James, he knows it was. There’s no chance that someone like Regulus, as dark and twisted and miserable as he believes himself to be, could feel that all on his own. James imparted a piece of himself onto Regulus that day when his hand gripped his wrist. The moments have been fleeting since, sometimes so minute that Regulus has to squint to make them out, but in this moment he trusts himself. He can still feel the warmth from the bits of sun placed inside of him. He knows they’re really there.

“I don’t know,” James finally manages. “I’ve been trying to figure that out myself. I– It’s something. I feel something. I don’t really know what it is. I mean– I think I do, but it’s hard to tell. I haven’t really felt it before. Does that make sense?”

“Yes,” Regulus assures him, genuinely. “That makes sense.”

“Really?” James asks hopefully, and he moves towards Regulus, standing only steps away him.

“Really.” Suddenly, Regulus feels like he might’ve lied to James, back at the lake, when he said he couldn’t be brave, or bold. He feels brave right now, bolder than he ever has before. He closes the gap between him and James, looking up at him. James’ hazel eyes search his own, and Regulus bites his lip.

“Can I kiss you?” It barely comes out a whisper, but Regulus knows James heard him anyway because he nods.

So Regulus does. 

Lifting up on the tips of his toes, he places his hands on James’ shoulders, bracing himself, and then they kiss. It’s soft and gentle at first, the warm touch of skin against skin. Chaste.

But then James presses forward, his eagerness evident as he moves his lips against Regulus’, opening his mouth slightly. Regulus responds in kind and the kiss deepens, Regulus’ arms wrapped around James’ neck and James’ hands knotted in his curls.

Regulus knew that kissing James Potter would be good, but this– this doesn’t just feel good. It feels right. He feels the warmth of James throughout his entire body, and he’s left tingling with it, basking in the light of it all. 

When they break apart, both slightly out of breath, James presses their foreheads together, grinning like he’s never grinned before.

“Wow,” He gasps.

Regulus laughs, closing his eyes, “Wow,” He agrees.

“Reg, that was– wow,” James presses a kiss to Regulus’ forehead. “Wow.” He says again, pressing a kiss to Regulus’ cheek. He continues, placing kisses over every inch of Regulus’ face, a breathy “wow” being murmured against his skin between each one, leaving Regulus laughing, brightly and happily. 

He feels so happy, a feeling of pure joy he isn’t sure he’s felt before, or could ever feel again. It’s overwhelming and satisfying, and somehow not enough all at the same time. He wouldn’t want it any other way. He doesn't know if it'll last. He doesn't think he cares. This is enough.