Depression hits hard.
‘Remus..?’
I saw the old man walk into the room.
‘What.’ I answered harshly. I know it was rude but I didn’t want him there at all.
‘I know how.. close you and Sirius were.’
‘No you don’t! You don’t get it Albus, at all’
‘Remu-‘
‘Get out.’
I heard the door close slowly as the man left the room. My eyes scanned the room. They fell on to the two half filled tea cups and the pink cased phone with a shattered screen. A small tear ran down my cheek once more. I furiously wiped it away but to no avail as more just followed.
The same routine passed for several hours. I stared into space. I cried. Then it repeated. It was like a was stuck trapped in a loop and I was. There was no point in living anymore.
Eventually, I got to my feet. My eyes fell on the cold tea cups once more. I pushed them aside.
I opened the door and candlelight flooded the room. My eyes burned.
The moon shone above my head. The stars glimmered just as bright.
The pharmacy doors flew open and I walked in. I looked to my left, the man at the counter stared at me intently but I was too exhausted to care.
I browsed through the aisles helplessly looking for something, I didn’t know what. Until I found it, a small bottle filled with a clear liquid. I stared at the label.
Immediately, I walked to the counter, my hands wrapped tightly round the small bottle.
‘Hi,just this please.’
I tried to sound enthusiastic but I failed miserably by the look on the cashiers face.
‘ You know how to use this sir?’
He seemed suspicious of my intentions.
‘Yes, yes of course!’
‘Ok that’ll be £7.52 please sir.’
I handed him the money and took the bottle and walked out. The doors shut behind me.
It was pitch black in the house when I got back. Everyone was asleep.
I stared at myself in the mirror. Fuck, I looked tired. I was, I was tired. So tired.
My eyes landed on the bottle lying on the counter.
‘What, the actual hell am I doing?’
I picked up the bottle and stared at the label.
Any more than 20 doses and I will be gone. So little yet so lethal.
I took the needle and the bottle and didn’t bother to check the dose. I didn’t really care that much.
I pushed up and the tiny needle filled with the clear liquid. I took my green shirt, that I had been wearing for three days now, off and took the needle and pressed it into my lower abdomen. For people with diabetes this thing keeps them alive but for me it’ll do the exact opposite.
I sat on the floor, waiting for the effects of the sugary substance to kick in.
After some time, my vision began to blur.
I smiled this was it, I’d see my friends once again, Sirius, Lily, James. I couldn’t wait.
‘Lupin?’
I had left the door open. And I saw the outline of a lady with violet hair.
‘Oh hey.. Tonks.’
She moved closer to me.
‘What- what are you doing on the floor?’
‘Oh Yknow.. just waiting to be gone from this life.’
‘What!’
The figure ran towards the me. She took something off the floor and looked at it hurriedly.
‘Honey.. wh-what did you take?’
‘Oh.. Yknow just some stuff..’
‘Lupi- Remus..’
‘don’t.. call me that!’
‘Alright, I’m sorry.. just get off the floor please’
She held out her hand. I stared at it. Then I reached out my hand also. She took it and tried to pull me to my feet.
I felt so shaky, so sweaty.
‘Come on. Let’s get you something to eat.’
‘I’m not hungry!’
Yea but we need to raise your sugar levels.’
She sat me down at the table. I focused my vision on the bright pink phone case.
I was to out of it to care.
Tonks placed a bar of chocolate in front of me. I laughed.
‘You.. you know me so well..’
She attempted to smile.
‘Yeah well I think everyone know how much you like chocolate.’
I stared at the plate.
‘I don’t really want any right now though.’
‘Lupi-‘
‘I said no thank you!!’
She sighed, and picked up the bar of Cadbury’s and took a bite.
‘Mmm I love chocolate so much.’
I teared up.
‘Hey, that’s-thats my chocolate not yours!’
She smirked.
‘Well you said you didn’t want any so it’s mine!’
‘No!’ I grabbed the bar off her and took a big bite.
‘Ha! Told you it’s mine!’
Tonks rolled her eyes whilst smiling, ‘ ok then I guess it’s yours then’
I took another bite.
‘Hey did you know that-that chocolate is dangerous for dogs?’
‘Yea yes I did why?’ She asked curiously.
‘Well I hate the werewolf side of my so when I was little I-I thought that if I ate it enough chocolate it would kill it.’ I laughed. ‘Can you believe I was that stupid!’
Her smiled instantly left her face.
‘Y-you’re a w-werewolf?’
‘Yes ye I am!’
‘Ok we’ll talk about this later’
What I hadn’t realised that in this time I had consumed the whole bar of chocolate.
The women looked at me with a look full of concern.
‘You should head to bed.’
Tonks walked me to my bed and tucked the covers around me.
‘Goodnight Lupin.’
‘Night..’