Stormy Nights
Barty
People were right when they said you never really treasured something unless you lost it. It had happened to him more than once. With Pandora and Dorcas, after the beginning of the war. With Evan, after he’d been captured by Aurors. And now, with Regulus.
The memories of the day they’d thought they’d lost him were still so vivid in his mind Barty sometimes found himself waking up in the middle of the night, heart pounding in his chest. Evan would comfort him, pull him back down in bed and wrap his arms around him, Barty’s back against his chest, telling him everything was alright now, that Regulus was safe. They’d temporarily moved to Pandora and Xenophilius’ place, in the spare guest room, until finding a definitive solution. The days after Regulus had moved over at James’ to recover from the latest events and get to spend some time with him after everything that had happened had felt like a confused whirl of feelings, worries and messy, undefined plans for the future.
He and James had gotten home in the middle of the night, and Remus had called to give Barty and Evan the news. They had all gone to visit him the following morning, after he’d gotten the needed amount of rest, and they’d found him sitting on the sofa, talking to Sirius, hand in his. Remus had told them Sirius had never left Regulus’ side the previous night, constantly apologising, ignoring Reg telling him it was fine, that he’d never hated him, that he forgave him and nothing was ever going to step between them ever again. Pandora had squeezed him in a hug so tight he’d had to gently complain about her almost cracking his ribs. The three of them had promised each other the chapter of their life serving as Voldemort’s Death Eaters had come to its very end.
Of course, the path towards going back to a normal life was still long. Some people had shown to be more open to forgiveness than others. But they’d get there, somehow.
However, Barty couldn’t wrap his mind around the fact that his future felt so unsure now. His only certainty was that Evan was going to be by his side, whatever choice he made.
That night was a stormy one, like most of the ones that week.
And, of course, with rain came thunder.
Though he wasn’t feeling that much in awe this time. Barty glanced out of the window, looking at the raindrops ticking on the windowsill, the sky packed with clouds hovering above the hills, creating a gloomy yet majestic image. A thunder roared in the distance, he distinguished its edgy shape bolting through the darkness, irradiating through the clouds like an electrical, deadly spider web.
“You know, I came to the conclusion that thunders have their beauty, after all” he told Evan, absentmindedly running his fingers through his hair as Evan rested his head on his chest, arms wrapped around him. Barty absolutely loved moments like these. In spite of all his uncertainty, he felt safe with him.
“I’ll confess something” Evan said, letting his hand slide in his. “They’ve always reminded me of you. You said they’re strong, unstoppable, a force of nature, fascinating and somehow mysterious, just like you”.
Barty smiled. “Do you really think so?”.
“Yeah. It’s just as if you had thunder inside you” Evan rested a hand on his bare chest, just above his heart.
“Thunders are also dangerous and unpredictable, Evan”.
“Yeah, well, who’s never liked a little risk?” Evan looked up at him, eyes shining. Barty returned his smile, though it slowly faded as he looked out of the window again.
It seemed as if all of their problems had been solved, now. Except for two…
“Do you think we’ll finally be able to be happy?”.
“I already am. I’m with you, we’re safe, Regulus is, he’s back by James’ side, my sister forgave me. Things couldn’t be better”.
“This apparent peace is only temporary, Evan, and you know that too. We’ll soon have to face the consequences of what we’ve done. The Dark Lord won’t let us get away with that so easily”. A bad feeling had started creeping inside him, as if wanting to remind him they still couldn’t let out a final sigh of relief, that danger could still be awaiting them. His eyes fell on the Dark Mark on his arm, matching with Evan’s. They’d never be able to get rid of that; it would forever mark which side they’d chosen, forever remind them of the people they’d tortured and killed, of every crime committed in his name.
“He won’t hurt us, Barty. Never again” Evan sounded so confident, yet Barty couldn’t help but be scared. He wrapped his arms around him, kissed the top of his head. The tranquillity of that moment suddenly felt so fragile. And once again, he feared for what was to come. Evan had already been snatched away from him once, and he’d lived with the fear of never being able to see him again, Regulus had almost died in an attempt at saving them which they yet didn’t know if had ended up well, based on Regulus’ report: an Horcrux to destroy, a task he’d assigned to Kreacher and didn’t know if it had yet been completed, as he hadn’t seen the house-elf after the events at the Cave.
Barty didn’t want any of them to be endangered again.
“We’ll be alright” Evan said, sensing his concern. “That’s a promise, okay?”.
Barty nodded. They both knew how difficult such oaths were to keep, as their destiny wasn’t for them to decide. Unpredictable like the thunders decorating the sky outside of the window.
The only thing they could count on was the other’s support, a shoulder to cry onto if needed, a handhold to hold onto during hard times. He’d never stop being thankful for having found Evan. He was the only one who’d ever fully understood him, the only one he’d ever been able to fully open up to, the only one he’d ever allowed to see him during his moments of weakness.
His embrace tightened a bit.
He’d never felt the need to protect someone as much as he did him. Evan rolled off his chest, on the mattress on his side, turned towards him and took his hand.
“This war will be over soon, Barty. It’ll be over and it won’t take us down. We’ve been through a lot, we’ll survive this too. And then, we’ll begin a new life together. We’ll buy a house to live a peaceful life in”.
“A house by the sea” Barty proposed, a smile blooming on his lips.
“Yes. We’ll open ourselves to a new future, get the job of our dreams. You’ll enter politics one day, take your father down, create a new world as you’ve always dreamed of. And… who knows, maybe I’ll get to realise my childhood dream”.
“What was it?” he asked, curious: he didn’t recall him ever telling him about it. “I… I’ve always dreamed of becoming an Auror, one day” Evan confessed, avoiding his gaze. “My father has never really approved of this, always trying to discourage me by talking about how messed up the wizarding world was, of how he didn’t want his child to get involved in any of its messed up intrigues. However, he turned up to be the first one blinded by the craving for power”. Barty brought a hand up to his cheek, Evan leaned in to his touch. “Anyway, yeah, I’ve always dreamed of becoming an Auror. The chances of it actually happening are pretty low, but one can always dream, right? You know, Pandora always told me something when we were kids: dreams are the only thing that can never be taken away from us. I’ve always lived by that conviction”.
“That’s amazing”.
Evan’s fingers travelled across Barty’s skin, tracing the lines of his veins, moving up his arm, then down again, until they reached his palm, then up again.
“I think we should add another point to our list” Barty smiled. Then he met his gaze, his brown eyes shone of the determinate spark Evan loved so much.
“I swear upon whatever gods that rule the skies I’m marrying you someday”.
“You know we don’t need marriage to prove our love” Evan said.
“I do. But I still want to marry you. To pronounce the vows of being by your side forever, in every circumstance, to love you and honour you until life dwells in my heart, until death do us part, and beyond. To add a golden ring on our ring finger along with our matching tattoos, a symbol of eternal love. I’m marrying you one day, Evan Rosier”.
“Yes. A million times yes”.
His first and only love.
What had he ever done to deserve him? Barty asked himself that question daily. He leaned forward to kiss him. Evan propped himself up, shifting above him.
“A future full of you: sounds pretty appealing to me”.
Barty cupped Evan’s face and lowered his lips to his.
Thunder echoed outside, matching the sound of his heartbeat.