Sing A New Song
Sirius had discovered the Come and Go room when he was wandering the halls looking for somewhere to crash for the night, way too afraid to make his way back to his dorm, or even the Gryffindor common room. He knew that the possibility of Remus laying eyes on him was too great to go back to the place he used to consider his home. Sirius was unsure of the arched doorway when it first appeared in front of him, on what used to be a blank stone wall, but he eventually made his way into the room when he heard footsteps coming down the corridor. The room that was offered to the man in need was small, a twin-sized bed and a desk to be exact, but in Sirius’ desperate need for a place to sleep he crawled into the bed and fell right asleep.
When he woke the next morning he felt just as exhausted as he did the night prior, he had been in and out of sleep all night, just thinking about the events that had transpired the night before. The room was quiet, too quiet, Sirius was used to the buzz of conversation coming from his dorm mates in the morning, or the crackle of the fireplace. All things that he would miss, all things he didn't quite deserve to miss, at least that's what he believes. Sirius was in desperate need of a time check, just to know what his plan should be for the rest of the day, where he should go to best avoid the people he used to call his friends. He glanced over at the clock and realized that everyone would be at breakfast by now and that it would be the perfect time to go retrieve his stuff for the day from his dorm, his old, dorm room.
Sirius made his way to Gryffindor Tower at quite a speedy pace, avoiding eye contact with any that was wandering the corridors, which weren't very many people at this time. As the portrait door swings open and Sirius can see into the Gryffindor common room, he sighs in relief to see that it is empty, no traces of students left. The stone stairs to the dorm room almost made Sirus run away from the tower and burst into tears, he would never be welcomed back into the space, at least not in the same way as before. He didn't even deserve to be welcomed back, when he pushed open the door to his shared dorm room, which was thank Merlin empty, he realized that it would be best to leave Gryffindor Tower altogether.
Sirius grabbed his trunk and filled it with all of his clothes, and his ABBA posters, he grabbed everything, shoved it half haphazardly into his trunk, and neatly made his bed, like he would do when he was at home over the holidays. Perfectly neat and tighty, the exact opposite of how he would leave his corner of the room. Sirius unpacks all of his stuff into the Come and Go room and packs up his school stuff for the day. In the time he spent moving dorms, he had missed breakfast, and most potions, he would rather take a detention from Slughorn than McGonagall, she could be harsh on them sometimes. He makes his way down to the Dungons classroom slowly, maybe if he is slow enough he won't have to go at all. When he gets to the classroom he sands outside the door for a second, releasing things will be the first time he sees his friends since they had been giving him a good shout yesterday when they had time to process what he had done, when they finally told Moony, Remus, that the person they despised in the entire world, knew his deepest darkest secret, and that the person who had told Snape that secret, was also the first person to know.
He pushed open the classroom door, Slughorn was in the middle of a demonstration.
“Ten points from Gryffindor Mr. Black, do you have a reason for your tardiness?”
“No Sir.”
“Well then detention with me after dinner, come straight here, all right you may take the seat next to Mr. Rosier, I'm sure he will be more than willing to catch you up on what you missed. Anyways, class” Slughorn continued with his lecture as Sirius sat next to Evan Rosier.
“Black, hey Black,” Sirius is startled out of his thoughts, “I'll give you my notes after class so you can copy them, we will be making the potion on Wednesday, it's just instruction today.”
“Thank you, Rosier.” Rosier nods and focuses his attention on the professor, Sirius tries to pay attention, but after missing half the lecture he is a little lost compared to everyone else. He looks over at the other side of the room to see Peter, James, and Remus sharing a table and scribbling notes to each other on a torn piece of parchment, just like they used to do with him. There was no doubt that they were talking about him, but not with worry or concern, he didn't deserve that, but with anger and resentment, they all had that look on their faces that told everyone in the room that something had gone wrong, everyone knew when the Marauders had gotten more detentions or pit deductions, but this time no one knows why the Marauders seem so angry at a certain Sirus Black.
The rest of the day went very smoothly, without any bumps for Sirius, though he was uncharacteristically invested in his studies, actually working on his homework in class, listening to the teachers, and excelling first try at the charms that he was taught. The teachers were impressed, the students were confused, this was not very Sirius Black-like, some kids theorized that he had something big planned and that he needed a free week to get it done, and others just basked in the silence of their classes. Sirius sat in his new room simply just doing his homework, when an owl pecked at the window, he had no idea how a window could lead out to the castle grounds based on where they were in the castle, but he thought it best not to judge.
The owl was carrying a letter addressed to Professor McGonagall. Sirius opened up the letter and read the request for him to visit her office. He was hoping that he wasn't being expelled, but it wouldn't surprise him if that was what McGonagall wanted to see him about, the incident, the Prank.
McGonagall’s office was not too far from the Gryffindor common room, however, it was a far way away from the Come and Go room. When Sirius arrives McGonagall is sitting in her chair scrawling away at a letter, it looks like she had a busy day, Sirius assumed that most of the time Minnie's office was in shambles by the end of the day, the woman was busy. Sirius knocks on the door frame to make her aware of his presence standing in the open doorway.
“Mr. Black, I wasn't expecting you to be so punctual, sit.” Sirius sits in the chair across from McGonagall. “I know that the last couple of days have been difficult, but I would like to discuss the consequences of your actions. You do understand that what happened is something that can not be ignored.”
“Yes Mam, I understand.”
“Good, I have invited Mr. Potter, Lupin, and Pettigrew to talk about the next steps, deeming their involvement with the situation.” Sirius’s breath caught in his throat, and having to face his friends, was something he wasn't ready for, but in all honesty, it didn't matter what he thought, McGonagall had already made her decision.
“Professor,” James pauses at the doorway as he sees Sirius sitting in the chair, and continues inside to sit down with Remus following behind.
“Is Pettigrew joining us?”
“He didn't think he was needed, he had very little to do with what happened.”
“I understand, long as that is alright with you we shall continue, Sirius, I would like to note that you will not be suspended, or expelled, this comes with saying, that you are on the brink of a suspension, so keep on your best behavior.” Sirius nods his head and she continues, “You shall attend classes and meals, but you are prohibited from attending any clubs, Hogsmeade weekends, or quidditch games, speaking of, you will not be invited back onto the team until next year. You will have detentions every night with me, or any professor available, for three months, extra coursework will be assigned to you to complete during these times, these detentions will begin tomorrow, you are also unable to visit home over the Christmas holiday, do you understand everything that I have said to you.”
“Yes, I understand” It was all horrible, all of it besides not having to go home for break, but that was a relief lifted off of his shoulders.
“Professor, why did you call me and Remus in?” James looks angry, probably hoping for an expulsion or something more severe, or maybe he just doesn't want to be in the same room as Sirius.
“I brought you here to discuss the dorm situations because you are all sharing a dorm, I would like to know whether we should move around the dorm arrangements?”
“I don't mind Mam,” Remus spoke up for the first time, hearing his voice made his heart skip a beat. “He can stay, as long as he promises to stay out of our way and not cause any problems.” McGonagall gives Sirius that look that she gives the students when they are saying something important.
“Of course, I can do that.”
“Are you sure, because as of recently I have realized that you have a hard time keeping your stupid mouth shut?” James was fuming now, he needed someone to take out his anger on, someone to yell and scream at, and Sirius was willing to give that to him.
“I know I'm sorry, can we discuss this later James, I promise I will listen to whatever you need to say, please.”
“Well perfect timing, I am done with you all now, I would encourage you all to talk, but please don't go around throwing fists.” She gave them a look before the three boys stood up and made their way out of her office and down the hall. Just when Sirius was going to take a different corridor, leading to the Come and Go room, James grabbed his wrist and pulled him into an empty classroom, Remus following somberly behind.
“Black, I'm going to talk with you, kindly, you say nothing, understood?” Sirius gives a quick nod. “We are not friends, not brothers, nothing you are just our dorm mate, nothing more. What you did was unforgivable, it was a betrayal of Remus’s trust, you can never take that back, and we will never forgive you.”
“I know your sorry Black, but I will never be able to forgive you for what you did.” Hearing Remus refuse to call him by his name hurt, made him want to beg on his knees for forgiveness, it made him want to cry.
“I know, I'm sorry.” James and Remus do not react the the boy's small voice, Sirius thinks they didn't even notice his stutter and the way his voice wavered like he was on the brink of breaking out into sobs. They noticed, and they just decided that this boy, their ex-best friend was not worth their worry anymore. James and Remus walk out of the classroom, and once the door shuts behind them Sirius breaks out into sobs.
After his detention, instead of messing around and talking with his friends in the Gryffindor common room, Sirius sat at his desk and finished all of the work that was assigned today, he even copied all of the notes that Rosier had given him. Sirius was bored, that was an understatement, but he found some comfort in the silence of homework, he could sit there for hours and pretend that his friends were in the same room finishing up their homework as well, he could only imagine.
When the morning came around, Sirius had already fallen into a routine, go down to breakfast right when it was served, grab toast, the only thing he would eat all day, he would sit in the Library and read, go to classes, finish his homework, then attend detentions. The extra coursework was hard, but Sirius found himself enjoying the work, it was something to keep his mind off of everything. There was something therapeutic to being alone in your silence.
“Mr. Black, I'm sorry, the library closed an hour ago, I have to make you leave.”
“Sorry Ma’am.” Sirius has been spending most of his time here, and that has begun to raise concern among the staff of Hogwarts. In the five years that they have been teaching Sirius Black, they have never seen him be this far ahead in his studies, Sirius Black had become a completely different person. The next couple weeks were a blur for Sirius, the weeks began to blur together and he got some semblance of a routine back, however, this made the worry from others grow, and his absence at meals, surrounding himself in his studies, never being seen in the Gryffindor common room, people were worried, especially Regulus Black.