Lilac - first love; reminiscence
They say your firsts are the ones you will remember forever. Your first love, your first kiss, and even your first date, can float around or even haunt your memories forever.
They also say your firsts are magical, and special.
The first love. Derek’s first love was Paige. A cute musician, who played the cello of all things, and who was very serious about her craft. For him, it was close to love at first sight.
She seemed nerdy, but she was cocky and fast on her feet. It only made Derek like her more. She was gorgeous, she was smart, she was everything he liked. She was his first crush, and eventually even his first love.
The first date. It hadn’t intentionally been a date. They were just studying. Right?
They were just on the couch, planning on doing a project. Studying turned into watching a movie under a cosy blanket. Which turned into another one. And that all ended with Paige in his arms, asleep, and with Derek frozen in time for just a bit. Just looking at this girl he now loved.
She looked perfect, and calm. As if she was right where she belonged. As if she had always been meant to be there, right there, in his arms.
Yes, Derek loved her. He realised this on their first date, and he promised himself he would cherish every moment, of every date, since he didn’t know how many they would have. He would never realise they wouldn’t have many dates anyway.
The first kiss. For Derek, it was Paige. For Paige, it was Derek. It happened when they were studying in the library. They were studying for a Spanish test, and before they knew it, their lips touched. It was quick and awkward. But once they started, they didn’t wanna stop. They didn’t go insane with it, but they definitely didn’t continue studying.
Derek remembers his first time. It wasn’t with Paige. He wished and still wishes it had been. This wasn’t love, or maybe just not yet. It wasn’t as pleasant as he had imagined. There was no spark. Only regret. Derek missed Paige during his first time. Maybe then it would be memorable in a good way, instead of creating a shiver down his spine whenever he thinks about it.
Derek remembers his first time. And the times after that. He just wishes he didn’t.
They say your firsts are the ones you will remember forever.
Derek remembers his first love. He had his first kiss with her. She was the first person he told he was a werewolf. She was the first person outside of his family he said “I love you” to. She was the first person outside of his pack that he never wanted to lose. The first person he imagined a future with. The first person he didn’t think he could live without.
She was also the first person to die in his arms.