Museums and Skateparks
Sirius and Remus were walking through St. James Park, arms interlinked. They had stopped at the Storey’s Gate to get some coffees to-go and Remus had poured an ungodly amount of sugar in his, much to Sirius’ bemusement. After settling down on a bench to watch some ducks swimming their rounds on the park lake, Sirius suggested to go visit the National Gallery which was not too far.
Sirius had always loved museums and viewed them with a full heart since he was a little boy. Not just because he loved art, even if that was certainly a part of it, but because they provided a space free of any screaming and mean words. They were quiet and warm and Sirius did not have to sit still and do nothing. No, he was allowed to roam almost freely and stare at paintings without being told off for it. His parents, usually unkeen to provide their sons with any entertainment, were in accord with their nanny taking them from one London museum to the next since they viewed it as cultural education and a worthy pursuit. They would not see Sirius’ choice to study art in the same way as it was not going to make him rich and they’d call it a waste of time, art solely reserved for time not occupied with work, but Sirius had left their house way before starting university. In any case, museums were Sirius’ safe space and he wanted to share that sentiment with Remus. It also certainly wouldn’t hurt to show off his art knowledge a bit.
“Ah is this your great plan how to seduce me?” Remus smirked after hearing Sirius’ proposition.
Sirius raised an eyebrow but his face was split by a bright grin. “What? You’re into museums or something?”
Remus leaned closer to him, his arm resting on the back of the bench behind Sirius. “No, I just dress like I work in one for laughs.”
“Could have fooled me. And anyways, I think I have already managed to seduce you.” Sirius said and stood up. He took Remus’ coffee cup from him and threw it together with his own into a close rubbish bin.
Remus stood up and linked their arms as they started walking towards Trafalgar square. “Must be so. I do like men that are too cocky for their own good.”
They got to the National Gallery in no time, deeply caught up in bantering. Remus had to hold Sirius back several times when he blindly wanted to cross the street and failed to see a bus driving towards them. Normally, Sirius was all about road safety, or at least scared what James and Effie would do to him if he didn’t look left and right, but he was too distracted with Remus and everything about him to waste time checking if a car was coming.
They wandered through the big halls and admired the art displayed against the colourful walls. Sirius dropped bits of knowledge whenever they stayed in front of a specific painting for some time. Remus listened intently and with great interest, asking questions and giving affirmative nods. Sirius almost blushed at the undivided attention. Remus could provide some historical details to Sirius’ explanations and sometimes Sirius caught people listening in on their conversations. When he let Remus know of this observation the other boy simply snickered and raised an eyebrow, “Guess we should go into the museum tour business.”
Towards the end of their round they got to Sirius’ favourite painting of that particular museum, namely ‘The Execution of Lady Jane Grey’. After standing next to each other in awed silence for some time Sirius said, “Did you know that she was only queen for nine days?”
Remus nodded sadly, “And she was only sixteen or seventeen years old. Always these young girls suffering for the schemes of old monarchs.”
“It’s crazy how you can feel her pain and innocence from the way she’s painted, isn’t it? How small she looks… And the symbol of the white dress.” Sirius said and pointed at the woman in the painting.
“You’re right, it’s quite impressive how it makes you feel this sense of dread and pain.”
Sirius shuddered but gave a sad smile. “Exactly what she must have felt. And you know how they say she apologised to the executioner for blindly tripping over her own feet.”
“Yea,” Remus sighed and let out a faint laugh, “Dorcas calls it her roman empire frequently.”
That provoked Sirius to grin too and the gloomy atmosphere dissolved a little. Sirius took the opportunity to pull Remus’ arm and the man attached out of Lady Jane Grey’s room and towards the gift shop. After buying each other a postcard of their choice, because as Sirius insisted ‘you cannot leave a museum without buying something in the shop’, the pair walked back outside.
“So, is this where I have to say bye to you?” Remus asked jokingly but Sirius didn’t miss the hint of disappointment in his voice.
Sirius turned so he was standing directly in front of Remus and took his hands in his own. “Not quite yet.” He said and walked Remus backwards until his back hit a wall.
“Oh? What are you-“ Remus said but was cut off by Sirius kissing him. His hands found themselves in Sirius’ hair so naturally as if it was the only space they truly belonged in. Sirius deepened the kiss and reached to rest his own hands on Remus’ lower back, pulling him as close as possible. The silly desire to merge fully with Remus was once again on Sirius’ mind. Closer than close, yes, that was the goal.
After detangling themselves from each other after making out for some time, Sirius was forced to check the time. “Shit, I do really have to go.”
Remus cocked his head and nodded softly, still holding Sirius in a loose embrace.
“I really don’t want to though.” Sirius said and rested his head against Remus’ chest. Leaving truly seemed like a nightmare.
“Me neither, love.” Remus kissed the top of his head. “But I don’t want your brother getting mad at me for making you miss your weekly facetime call.”
Sirius rolled his eyes in endearment at Remus who couldn’t even see him from the position he was in. But Sirius felt so utterly seen and cared for it was easier to deflect it all with an eyeroll instead of thinking about it too deeply. “Oh, he’d reserve his anger solely for me. I’m privileged that way.”
Remus laughed. “Well I don’t want him to be angry at you either.”
“Stop being so cute when I have to leave.” Sirius mumbled into Remus’ chest.
“What?” Remus said giggling and Sirius felt the urge to record it and listen to it during sleepless nights.
He lifted his head from where it was resting against Remus and looked up at him. “When can I see you again?” He asked.
Remus’ lips pulled up immediately and he was biting down on them. “Someone’s eager.”
“Shut up.” Sirius playingly narrowed his eyes at the taller man. “It’s your fault that I lost my mysteriousness so you don’t get to make fun of me for it.”
Remus’ size crumbled a bit under his laughs. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. You’re very mysterious, truly never know your next move. You’ve shoved me against walls an almost concerning amount of times like, you know, someone really cool and elusive.”
“This still counts as making fun of me, Moony.” Sirius raised his eyebrow at Remus who held up his arms in a gesture of innocence.
“That may be your opinion but I was just telling you what made me fall for you.”
Sirius mouth dropped open, “Oh, so you’ve fallen for me?”
Remus’ whole face went red and Sirius let out a soft disbelieving laugh. “Wasn’t that obvious?” Remus said and Sirius cupped his cheek to pull him in for a quick kiss.
“Don’t worry,” Sirius said after pulling away, “I’m there too. At least I’m not the only one making a fool of myself anymore.”
“I can assure you, love, we’re both struggling together. Even if you fight with slightly unfair means, coming on this date in that outfit.” Remus indicated Sirius’ skirt and baby tee. Before Sirius could defend himself, even if he was definitely trying to wear outfits which would make Remus blush the most, Remus shushed him by pressing a finger against his lips. “Anyways, I was just gonna tell you when we’ll have our next date.”
“Oh yea?” Sirius asked, teeth pressing into his bottom lip, his eyes sparkling.
Remus nodded. “I’ve actually already thought about this – no laughing – what would you think about joining me next time I go skating. You could watch me and I could teach you some things. Oh, and there’s a nice burrito place next to the skatepark so we could have dinner. But just tell me if you think that’s stupid, or boring or whatever but I just thought it could be cute.”
Sirius stood up on his tiptoes to kiss Remus again. “That would be absolutely wonderful. 10/10 date idea, Moony.” Remus pushed his elbow in Sirius’ rips as he was speaking the last sentence in a mocking tone. Sirius grinned but looked into Remus’ eyes trying to convey that he actually thought it was a great idea. “So, tomorrow then?” He asked and Remus send him the biggest smile.
***
Sirius had no idea how to dress for a skating date. He just put on the baggiest clothes he owned and went into the living room to ask for James’ approval. He got it as well as James’ skateboard. Sirius truly had the best friend in the whole world.
He met Remus right at the skatepark which was impressively equipped with silver glistening pipes and handrails. Streaked over the asphalt, there was a huge pool and some smaller pits painted dark blue inside. Sirius saw a few skaters race up and down ramps and then he finally spotted Remus who was coming down a pyramid. He was grinning at Sirius and effortlessly made his way towards him.
“Hey, there you are.” He said, jumping off his board right in front of Sirius and pulled him close with an arm around his shoulder to kiss him.
“There I am.” Sirius confirmed and couldn’t help blushing a little. Remus seemed right in his element and he had never looked this good.
Remus entangled their hands and stroked his thumb over the back of Sirius’ hand. As he looked down his eyes widened a fraction. “Oh, I was just gonna give you my board but seems like James has already provided you with that.”
Sirius smirked and held up James’ board on which he had drawn red and orange flames only a few days earlier. “How do you know it’s not my own?”
Remus let out a giggle, “Please, who do you think you’re kidding?” Remus gave him a quick once-over and Sirius didn’t know if he should feel pleased or offended at the way Remus’ eyes crinkled. “Besides I know how James’ board looks. Cool flames though, where did he get that done?”
Sirius blushed again, “I did that.”
“You did?” Remus said and his eyes almost widened comically. “Damn Sirius that’s impressive. I mean I knew you studied art but I didn’t know you’re such a talented artist too.”
Sirius rolled his eyes lovingly. “You’re making me blush on purpose, aren’t you?”
Remus looked up at him surprised, finally removing his eyes from Sirius’ artwork. “What? I mean yes I enjoy making you blush but that’s actually so cool, Sirius.”
Sirius bit his lower lip and nodded gratefully. “So,” he said, “Are you gonna make good on your promise and teach me?”
It would be an overstatement to say that Sirius was terrified once he was standing on the skateboard, excruciatingly nervous might be a better adjective. He hated things he wasn’t immediately good at and skating seemed to belong to that category. Remus was holding both of his hands while he pulled Sirius encouragingly over the flat area of the skatepark. He had tried to let go a couple of times to simply let Sirius roll on his own but Sirius had always clawed onto his hands, scared he would fall and embarrass himself. Remus was joking with him and occasionally pressed a kiss to his palms but Sirius was not able to relax. What if Remus thought he was an idiot for not being able to skate well? After a few more rounds Sirius decided that just desperately holding on might be even more embarrassing than simply giving it a try. So, the next time Remus loosened his grip Sirius let him.
And then he was off. Racing over the asphalt with quite some security and all on his own.
“I’m doing it, Moony, I’m doing it” He shouted and turned around to see Remus’ reaction. That was a mistake, however, because it made Sirius sway in his stance and the skateboard made a sudden left turn. Sirius lost his balance and fell down the board in a jumping motion.
He immediately felt anxious and slowly looked back at Remus, scared to see disappointment on his face. Quite in contrast though, Remus came running towards him with a big grin. “You did so well, baby!”
“But I fell.” Sirius said baffled and pointed to the skateboard laying a few meters to his left.
Remus shook his head with the smile still plastered on his face. “Everyone falls. But look at all the way you went before that.” He made a wide gesture with his arm and indicated the place where Remus had let go off Sirius. It clicked right then and there: Sirius had no reason to be nervous, Remus would never actually judge him. He could be as silly, as good or bad at skating, as he wanted and Remus would always run up to him with a smile.
“And I’ve never seen someone fall so gracefully.” Remus teased and picked up Sirius’ skateboard.
Sirius’ whole face was taken over by a grin. “Oh shut it you! I just didn’t want to intimidate you too much.”
Remus raised his eyebrows playfully. “Oh, is that so?” Sirius nodded with a mischievous glint in his eyes. “Well there you go, champ, show me how it’s done.” Remus said. He grinned and handed Sirius his board.
Sirius gave his best tries for the next twenty minutes. He did gain some skills quite quickly and managed to even do turns to skate back towards Remus but he also fell quite a few more times. Finally, he returned to Remus’ side and jumped off his board.
“Enough for today.” He wheezed and propped himself up with a hand on Remus’ shoulder. “How did nobody tell me that skating is this exhausting? I always thought the board does all the work.”
Remus snickered and put an arm around Sirius’ waist. “Does that mean you wanna watch me for a bit now?”
Sirius nodded gratefully but raised his eyebrows as a thought came into his head. “Is this how you plan to make me your fan?”
Remus looked confused for a second before his eyes twinkled, seemingly remembering their conversation the first night they met. “Yes.” He said, trying to stay serious but failing endearingly. “That was my master plan all along. You’ll have to tell me if it’s working.”
Not waiting for Sirius’ reply he dropped his own board and jumped on it with a quick push from his foot. He raced to an area of the park with deep pits and started doing one trick after the other. He launched himself into the air at the edge of a pit and flicked his board so that it spined below his feet. Then he dropped himself back into the hole and jumped up at the opposite edge to lock his back truck on and grinded along the rail. Sirius’ mouth was hanging open as Remus did another kickflip. If he wasn’t careful he would start drooling any second now. There was something undeniably hot about the way Remus seemed to skate like his life depended on it, like he was born on a skateboard and made to blow everyone’s minds. He had already succeeded with Sirius’ who was ringing for air as Remus did all his tricks effortlessly and even managed to send Sirius a smile or a wink when he caught his eye. Sirius was deeply in awe and so very attracted to the man reigning the skatepark. Remus had most definitely a fan in Sirius. He’d been one before but there was no coming back now.
There were a few other skaters jumping in and out of the pits next to Remus. Sirius recognized a platinum-haired boy amongst the crowd who looked eerily like Pandora. Remus had shown him a picture of them together, it was his friend Evan, Pandora’s twin brother. Evan was almost as talented as Remus and the two currently shared a pit, shredding past each other and laughing as they tried different partner tricks. Remus had told Sirius about a big competition happing this summer where he wanted to participate in the solo section as well as in the couples section together with Evan. It seemed as if they were trying out their moves.
Suddenly Evan’s skateboard slipped out from under his feet right as he was approaching the edge of the pit. He fell off it and slid down to the bottom of the hole. Anxiously, Sirius ran up to the pit and arrived as Remus was helping Evan climb out of the pit. Evan was bleeding faintly from his right knee and thick scratches were all over his hands. Sirius watched as Remus transported a slightly limping Evan to the sidelines of the park, positioning him on a bench and slipping him a piece of chocolate.
“Eat, it will make you feel better.” Sirius heard him say before Remus walked back towards him. “And how was that?” Remus said winking at him.
“You were incredible.” Sirius said and Remus smiled at him sheepishly. “But is your friend okay? That seemed like a nasty fall.”
Remus only laughed in response which made Sirius feel queasy. “Oh don’t worry.” Remus said as he noticed Sirius’ frown. “It’s just a little fall. Evan’s used to that, he’s been through worse. Honestly such things happen all the time here. He just needs a little break and he’ll be back on his board in no time, I promise.” And with that he pressed a kiss on Sirius’ cheek, bopped his nose and was back on his board racing into a pit.
Sirius felt like throwing up. Not only was Remus in a risky position but he was also not taking the danger seriously and had apparently been in situations like Evan’s – or even worse ones – multiple times before. Sirius felt deeply concerned for his man and wanted to get him into the safety of his arms as soon as possible. At the same time he also felt a fraction pathetic. Sirius was normally a fanatic advocate of danger and everything thrilling. He thought of himself as a rebel, a daredevil, someone ballsy enough to fall for every test of courage, if his friendship with James was anything to go by. And yet he couldn’t help feeling worried and scared for Remus as he shot up and down the pit. Panic had settled in his stomach and he had never felt that way about anyone else before. Sure, he had gotten worried over Reggie a bunch of times. But that was only when there was something actually tangible to be concerned about, like psychopathic parents or drug abuse or the one time Regulus was four years old and leaned way too far out a windowsill. Never when Regulus wanted to do something for adrenaline – Sirius had always encouraged his little brother to live a little on the wild side, especially as Regulus had been very pensive as a child.
No, what he felt about Remus right now was different. This feeling of dread and fear was new. Remus seemed to be truly special and Sirius must like him even more than he had thought possible.
All trapped in his anxious thoughts, Sirius only noticed Remus’ arrival as he was pulled into a hug and received a kiss to his forehead. “All good, love? You look like you’ve seen a fucking ghost.”
Sirius aimed for a nonchalant snort but it came out strained.
“What’s wrong?” Remus became immediately concerned. “Did something happen?”
“No, no.” Sirius quickly stopped him, not wanting to make Remus worry over Sirius’ newly acquired concerns. “It’s just- Well I mean the skating… It’s not very- I mean Evan, he-“ Sirius stammered and felt his hands getting clammy. “It’s a little dangerous. That’s all.” He finally brought out and looked up from where he’d been staring holes into the asphalt.
Remus was staring back at him with wide and warm eyes. He cocked his head to the side and examined Sirius curiously. Then his face broke into a grin. “Aw! Does this mean you’re worried about me?” He teased.
Sirius let out an annoyed breath but calmed a bit at Remus’ eyes which were twinkling at him. “I’m not joking, Moons, this seems quite unsafe. And you’re not even wearing any protection gear!”
Remus smiled at him as if he had just said something adorable. “Is the Sirius Black really telling me to be careful and wear kneepads?” He open-mouthed giggled and exposed the slight gap between his two front teeth. Sirius melted a bit at that in combination with the freckles bouncing over Remus’ scrunched up nose but remained his frowning expression.
Remus noticed and let out a soft sigh. “Listen Sirius, I promise you I know what I’m doing. I’ve been skating since like forever and yes I’ve fallen before but trust me, it’s never been worse than a few scratches. I know it can look dangerous but I’m always careful. I know my life’s worth and I would never gamble with it.”
Sirius grew more gentle at Remus’ sincere words and he felt quite inclined to believe him. Just as he was cuddling up into Remus’ space to give him a hug, something popped into his mind. “But what about your scars?” He asked carefully, afraid to be overstepping any boundaries but needing to ask anyways. If Remus had gotten them from skating, Sirius needed to know, just so that he could internally prepare himself should a situation like that arise again. Remus always made him feel like he wanted to share everything with him but Sirius knew about pain and how it’s sometimes so deep within you that digging it up can be an almost impossible feat. So, he quickly added, “You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. Really, that’s no problem, I would understand.”
Remus was looking at him with big eyes and a strained bottom lip, a thousand emotions dancing over his face. Sirius only calmy looked at him, hoping to express strength but waiting for Remus to make the next move. The scars were running criss-cross over Remus’ beautiful face. There was a long one going right over his left eye and eyebrow while another lay over the bridge of his nose. They looked absolutely mesmerising to Sirius.
Remus rubbed his eyes with a hand which was also specked with scars. He cleared his throat and closed his eyes. When he opened them again he looked at Sirius with regained clarity. “I didn’t get them from skating, Sirius. I got them in a car crash.” Remus was carefully putting one word after the next as if he had calculated exactly what to say. “When I was seven. Both my parents died instantly.”
Sirius took a sharp inhale of breath. He wanted to cry at Remus’ loss and hug him until there was no pain able to get in between them ever again. But Sirius had told his own story too often not to know that Remus definitely wanted no pity and no mothering. This was his story and he had gotten through it on his own.
“I’m sorry.” Sirius said and tried to convey in his expression that this changed nothing about how he viewed Remus, only seeing him as even braver and stronger than before. “Thank you for telling me.”
Remus nodded slowly and let out a sigh, “It’s okay. I’ve been meaning to tell you. People I have never spoken to ask me about my scars and I tell them because it’s not something I hide and it’s been enough years for me to come to terms with it. You’re so important to me so I’ve wanted to tell you for a while but you never asked and well, I guess I somehow forgot about it.” He tried for a grin but it seemed shaky and wrong on his face.
“Remus,” Sirius said tenderly and put a hand on Remus’ cheek, “It is not your responsibility to tell me about your scars. I mean I’m glad you told me but you would have been in the right to never tell me at all.”
Remus smiled again and this time it looked right. He pulled Sirius into a quick kiss and mumbled against his lips, “You know that I really really like you.”
Now it was Sirius’ turn to beam. “Me too, Moony, I really really really like you. Now, can we get some burritos? I’m starving.”