Dreams and reality
A week had passed since the tour, yet Stacey couldn’t stop thinking about Jhoanna. Every fleeting moment they had shared replayed in her mind. The teasing, the awkward silences, and the way Jhoanna looked at her when she thought Stacey wasn’t paying attention. It was absurd how much space Jhoanna occupied in her thoughts. Even more absurd was how oblivious Jhoanna seemed to everything.
Since their return, Stacey had been messaging her, trying to keep their connection alive. At first, she assumed Jhoanna’s lack of response was due to being busy or tired after the tour. But now, it felt deliberate, as though Jhoanna was avoiding her. Stacey couldn’t help but wonder if she had said or done something wrong. The thought gnawed at her.
That morning, Stacey sent another playful message: Good morning, love 💕. It was a way of testing the waters, hoping for a reply that mirrored the warmth they shared during the tour. But there was no response. Just silence. Frustrated, she tried again:
To: Jhoanna Love
Ignored parin this day? You know you can actually tell me what I did wrong right?"
Still nothing. Her chest tightened as she stared at the screen. Doubts crept in. Had Jhoanna never truly liked her? Had she merely tolerated Stacey during the tour because they were paired as buddies?
By afternoon, Stacey found herself at a café where she spotted Colet and Aiah chatting with Jhoanna. The trio laughed and talked casually, but Stacey’s focus remained on Jhoanna. The unanswered messages weighed heavily on her mind, and seeing Jhoanna laughing with their friends only intensified her frustration.
“So you were saying you’ve had your first crush on tour. Sino Jho?” Aiah asked suddenly.
Stacey froze mid-step, her heart pounding as she accidentally eavesdropped on their conversation. First crush? On tour? She held her breath, waiting for Jhoanna’s answer.
“Isn’t it obvious? Stacey right?” Colet said casually.
Stacey nearly choked on her own saliva. What?! Her? It seemed impossible that Jhoanna could have feelings for her. Yet doubts mingled with hope. Was there something more to their moments during the tour?
Jhoanna stammered out a vague denial, insisting it was “someone from the tour.” Stacey’s chest sank slightly. Of course it wasn’t her. Why would it be? She understood.
Summoning courage, Stacey approached them and joined the conversation. She joined the teasing even as her heart ached.
She tried to mask her disappointment as Aiah teased her with a grin.
“By the way Stacks, hindi ka ba nagseselos?”
Caught off guard, Stacey instinctively repeated the word “Nagseselos.” Before context could even be provided.
Colet chimed in with laughter “Wala pa nga eh.”
The group burst into laughter while Stacey sat there feeling confused—and perhaps a little embarrassed. Was this teasing about Jhoanna again? Or just their usual banter?
Finally, Jhoanna spoke up for the first time in what felt like ages. “Kasi sobrang close niyo ni ate Colet na parang kayo yung mag mu?”
Her words hit Stacey like a ton of bricks. Was that jealousy in Jhoanna’s voice? No—it couldn’t be. Her gaze wasn’t directed at Stacey but at Colet and Aiah. Still, something about her tone made Stacey’s heart race.
When Colet began playfully discussing setting Jhoanna up with someone else, jealousy surged through Stacey unexpectedly. The thought of Jhoanna being with anyone else made her stomach churn. Unable to process her emotions fully, Stacey abruptly stood up.
"Mauna na pala ako sa inyo girls. I have somewhere to go pa kasi," she said quickly, trying to sound casual despite the turmoil inside.
As she left the café, Stacey couldn’t shake off the feeling that she was running away—not just from the situation but from something deeper within herself. Was it fear of losing Jhoanna? Or simply accepting that Jhoanna might never see her in the same light?
Stacey was ranting about Jhoanna to Sheena, her words slurring slightly from the alcohol. The bar was loud, but it felt like she was screaming into the void.
“She’s a cheater!” Stacey exclaimed dramatically, slamming her glass down on the table. “She... cheated on me in adream! With ate Aiah! Can you believe that? With Ian Ven!” Her voice cracked as she gestured wildly, nearly knocking over the bottle of liquor.
Sheena sighed, clearly regretting her decision to babysit her ate Stacey tonight. “Stacks, it was just a dream,” she said, trying to calm her down.
“JUST a dream?” Stacey shot back, her words slurring slightly. “We were married first and then by the next dream sila na ni ate Aiah? That’s emotional cheating!” She pointed an accusatory finger at no one in particular, feeling righteous in her drunken statements.
Stacey continued ranting to the poor Sheena.
"Eh- kasi...- naman...sino ba kasi yung- crush niya?"
"Mas ma- maganda ba sa akin? Bakit- why di nalang ako?"
A drunken sobbing mess is what Stacey looks right now. But what would it matter? She's just trying to let out all of her frustrations to the oblivious Jhoanna who she's been crushing on for almost 2 years. Two damn years and Jhoanna would treat her this way?
"Tapos- .... Tapos mag eentertain pa siya ng iba kasi.. kasi- maraming naghahabol sa kanya? Di- di ba niya alam na"
Sheena struggled to get the glass of liquor away from her hand. Sheena had called Jhoanna for help earlier when Mikha excused herself for a family matter. When will Jhoanna arrive? The poor Sheena wondered as she keep on struggling to help her ate Stacey.
"Di ba niya alam na... Na first year pa lang hinahabol ko na siya?" Sheena laughed at Stacey's drunk confession. While Jhoanna who overheard it?
"Wala lang ba sa kanya yung mga-" Stacey was about to yet again bring up her frustrations about the tour thing and how she thought there was something happening with her and Jhoanna, finally. She can't even finish her sentences. She is crying about how ridiculous she looks, how ridiculous this all felt.
"That damn cheater!"
"Jhoanna that damn cheater! How dare she call me love and then act like it was nothing?!"
That was all it took Jhoanna to finally give up. Jhoanna gave up. Her swirling mind calmed and her decision was final. Jhoanna stopped. Realization hit her and she stopped. She gave up denying. She stopped fighting with herself. She choose Stacey. She had said earlier, bahala na masaktan. And now it's final. Hindi na niya idedeny. Hindi na niya pipigilan. With her newfound determination, she approached. 'Stavey Sevilleja, panindigan mo ako' she thought as her movements are all involuntarily leading her to the drunk Stacey.
"I swear to God bebe Shee- that damn cheater will pay-" Stacey continued.
Before Sheena could respond, Jhoanna appeared behind Stacey, her arms crossed and an amused yet frustrated expression on her face. Stacey’s heart skipped a beat despite herself. Jhoanna looked… annoyingly good. Even under the dim bar lights, her presence felt like it lit up the room.
“Speak of the devil,” Stacey muttered under her breath before glaring at Jhoanna. “What are you doing here?”
“I came to fetch you,” Jhoanna said simply, stepping closer and taking in Stacey’s disheveled state. “Sheena called me.”
“Oh, so now you care?” Stacey snapped, crossing her arms defensively. “Where was this concern when you started ignoring me all week?”
Jhoanna’s brows furrowed, and she sighed deeply. “I wasn’t ignoring you.” Jhoanna had to lie. Stacey is cute when upset but she can't bear to see Stacey's sad face directed to her.
“Yes, you were!” Stacey shot back. “You stopped calling me ‘love.’ You stopped-... You stopped everything! And then you just—just disappeared!”
Jhoanna pinched the bridge of her nose like she was trying to keep herself from saying something she’d regret. Not now. This can wait until she's sober. Jhoanna want her sober when she would confess. “Stacey,” she began slowly, her tone measured, “you’re drunk.”
“Drunk or not,” Stacey retorted, standing up unsteadily and poking Jhoanna’s shoulder for emphasis, “you’re still a cheater!”
Jhoanna’s eyes widened at that before narrowing dangerously. “Cheater?” she repeated.
“Yes!” Stacey exclaimed dramatically. “You cheated on me with ate Aiah in that dream! Who does that?!”
Jhoanna stared at Stacey for a long moment before letting out a sharp laugh—half amused, half exasperated. “Are you seriously mad at me over something that happened in your dream?”
“It was our dream!” Stacey corrected her indignantly.
“Oh my God,” Jhoanna muttered under her breath before stepping closer until they were practically nose-to-nose. Too close. Both of their hearts are thumping much loudly than the inside noise of the bar.
“You’re unbelievable,” Jhoanna said softly but firmly.
“And you’re a cheater,” Stacey shot back stubbornly.
That was apparently the last straw for Jhoanna because before Stacey could say another word, Jhoanna grabbed her face with both hands and kissed her—hard.
It wasn’t gentle or sweet. It was frustrated and desperate and full of all the emotions they’d been avoiding for weeks. Stacey’s eyes widened in shock before fluttering shut as she melted into the kiss despite shaking. Jhoanna is shaking. Realizing what she just did. Their first kiss? On a bar full of drunk people? Sheena's face can't even be painted. Should she record this? No. Sheena will keep it to herself. Finally after so long, their matchmaking (?) is finally, FINALLY happening. Sheena would brag about this to her ates.
When Jhoanna finally pulled away, her face was red from embarrassment and from sheer frustration. “There,” Jhoanna said breathlessly, her voice tinged with annoyance. “Does that feel like cheating to you?”
Stacey blinked at her dumbly, completely speechless for what felt like the first time all night.
“Well?” Jhoanna prompted impatiently.
Stacey stuttered, unable to form words as her brain tried to process what just happened.
Jhoanna rolled her eyes but couldn’t hide the slight smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. “You’re ridiculous,” she muttered before grabbing Stacey’s arm.
"Sheena are you drunk? If not uwi ka na." Sheena was literally too stunned to speak. Mouth still apart, Sheena could only nod her head repeatedly and gathered all of her belongings to go. When Sheena is out of sight, Jhoanna pulls Stacey towards the exit.
“Wait—where are we going?” Stacey asked weakly as Jhoanna practically dragged her out of the bar.
“Home,” Jhoanna said firmly without looking back.
“But—”
“No buts,” Jhoanna interrupted sharply. “You’ve had enough drama for one night.”
Stacey let out a small huff but didn’t fight Jhoanna’s grip on her arm. Her cheeks were still burning from the kiss. And maybe from the alcohol too—but mostly from the kiss.
As they stepped outside into the cool night air, Stacey couldn’t help but glance at Jhoanna out of the corner of her eye. Jhoanna looked determined yet oddly calm now that they were away from the chaos of the bar.
“Jhoanna?” Stacey said softly after a moment.
“What?” Jhoanna replied without looking at her.
“You kissed me.”
Jhoanna finally turned to face her fully, her expression unreadable. “Yeah,” she said simply.
“Why?” Stacey asked hesitantly.
Jhoanna’s gaze softened slightly as she sighed again, this time more tired than frustrated. “Because you wouldn’t shut up about Aiah,” she admitted honestly before adding with a teasing smirk, “and because maybe… just maybe… you’re not entirely wrong about how I feel.” The whole Jhoanna crushing on Stacey thing?
Stacey’s heart skipped another beat at Jhoanna’s words as she stared at her in stunned silence.
“Now come on,” Jhoanna said lightly, tugging on Stacey’s arm again. “Let’s get you home before you start accusing me of cheating with Sheena next.”
Despite being drunk to process it all, Stacey laughed. A small but genuine sound and followed Jhoanna willingly into the night. Maybe this wasn’t how she imagined things would go between them… but it was definitely better than any dream could ever be.
Stacey had been nursing her crush on Jhoanna for two years now, not a secret but she guarded it like a treasure. But tonight, after the whirlwind of emotions at the bar, things were about to take an unexpected turn.
Stacey couldn’t help but feel a mix of confusion and excitement. The kiss still lingered on her lips, and her mind was a whirlwind of emotions. Where were they going? And why did Jhoanna seem so determined?
Stacey couldn’t resist poking fun at her.
“You’re still a cheater,” Stacey mumbled, her words slightly slurred from the alcohol. She leaned against Jhoanna for support, though it was unclear whether it was the liquor or her feelings weighing her down.
Jhoanna rolled her eyes but smiled faintly as she guided Stacey to the couch. “You’re ridiculous"
The ride to 'home' was short. With Stacey mentally noting that the road was unfamiliar, meaning they were not headed to her apartment. When they reached, Stacey couldn't hep but to ask again.
“Where are we headed?” Stacey asked, trying to keep up with Jhoanna’s brisk pace.
“Home,” Jhoanna replied simply, not looking back.
Stacey’s heart skipped a beat. Home? Whose home?
But before she could ask, Jhoanna led her into a cozy apartment building. The familiar scent of plants and old books wafted through the air as they stepped into the elevator.
As the doors opened on Jhoanna’s floor, Stacey’s eyes widened. This was it! The apartment from their dreams. The one where they were married, surrounded by lush greenery and stacks of books. She felt a flush rise to her cheeks as memories of those dreams flooded back.
Jhoanna noticed her gaze and smiled softly. “Welcome to my place,” she said, unlocking the door and gesturing for Stacey to enter.
Stacey stepped inside, her eyes scanning the room. It was just as she remembered. Cozy, with plants spilling over the windowsills and books stacked haphazardly on shelves. The familiarity was both comforting and unnerving.
“Wow,” Stacey breathed, her voice barely above a whisper. “It’s just like...”
Jhoanna raised an eyebrow. “Like what?”
Stacey hesitated, unsure if she should mention the dreams. But something about Jhoanna’s curious expression made her take a chance.
“Like our dreams,” she said softly, her eyes meeting Jhoanna’s.
For a moment, they just stared at each other. Then Jhoanna nodded, a small smile playing on her lips. “I know,” she said quietly. “I remember them too.”
Stacey’s heart skipped another beat. She remembered? What did that mean?
Jhoanna gestured for Stacey to sit down, and as she did, Stacey couldn’t help but feel a little flustered. This was it. The place where, in her dreams, they lived together. Where they laughed and argued and cuddled!
As Jhoanna handed her a glass of water and sat down beside her, Stacey felt a rush of emotions. She was in Jhoanna’s apartment, surrounded by the very things that had made their dreams feel so real.
“Thanks,” Stacey said softly, taking a sip of the water.
Jhoanna smiled and leaned back into the couch, her eyes never leaving Stacey’s face. “You’re welcome,” she replied, her voice low and soothing.
The silence that followed was comfortable, yet charged with an unspoken tension. Stacey couldn’t help but wonder what this meant for them. Would this be the start of something new or just a momentary lapse into a fantasy they both couldn’t shake?
As she glanced around the room again, Stacey felt her heart flutter. Maybe, just maybe, this was where their dreams could become reality. And with Jhoanna sitting beside her, smiling softly as if she knew exactly what Stacey was thinking, Stacey couldn’t help but feel a spark of hope.
“Jhoanna?” she said softly after a moment.
“Yes?” Jhoanna replied, her eyes locked on Stacey’s.
Stacey hesitated, unsure how to phrase her question. But something about Jhoanna’s gentle expression made her take a chance.
“Do you think... maybe our dreams were trying to tell us something?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
Jhoanna’s smile softened further, and she leaned closer until their faces were inches apart. “Maybe,” she whispered back. “Maybe they were.”
And with that, Stacey felt her heart soar. Maybe this was the start of something real. Something that could bridge the gap between their dreams and reality.
For now, the both of them knew that they were dreaming about love. And now? That dream could be a reality. And it's about love.