Dreaming Love

Sevilleja buddy system
Good morning love💕

I rub my eyes to get rid of my sleepiness as I reach for my glasses. Pero kailangan pa ba? Gising na ang buong diwa ko pagkabasa ko sa message. Bumangon ako sa pagkakahiga at chineck ang oras.

6:30 am
Ping, and another message.

Sevilleja buddy system
Don't be late, love.💕

I smiled at the notification, my ears red. Tumayo ako at inayos ang higaan.

To: Sevilleja buddy system
Good morning
I won't, love 💕

I stretched pagkatapos ko magreply at nagdecide na mag prepare na. It's been a few days since nag reply ako kay Stacey. Well, to be exact 9 days. If you are wondering about the tour? Na move siya 1 week after the date. Meaning bukas na kami aalis.

And if you're wondering about the messages? Well we've been doing that since the day after I replied. I know for sure it's nothing serious. In that 9 day duration, one day ko lang nakita si Stacey. It was in our Monday class. I remember sobrang kaba ko pa noon dahil di ko alam pano siya haharapin, knowing we've been messaging each other in a somewhat flirty manner. Aabsent sana ako but she 'reminded me' not to. 'Don't be absent, love 💕' something like that. Syempre sino ba naman ako para hindi sumunod?

Anyways on that day, I expected at least her teasing remarks? Or confrontation of what we've been doing? Pero it didn't happen. We are not seatmates. And even as I try to look her way, umiiwas siya. Well ano pa bang bago? Well I was a little bit disappointed that day. Just a little bit. I swear.

Akala ko kasi. Pero okay, dedma. What surprised me though, is that the night after that day, she messaged me. Like nothing happened. Like di niya ako iniwasan. And syempre the 'love 💕' is still present on her chats. I was confused. Why? I don't know. Pero at least I know she definitely isn't serious about what we've been doing. Is it inside jokes on her side? That would make sense. Then, inside joke it is. That's what I thought while I replied to her chats. And syempre, my reply also contains 'love 💕 '.

And so that's why we fell into this playful banter and flirting(?) set up. Inside joke? Well I don't care. Keep it coming.

It's Thursday morning. The second year students of HM doesn't have class in preparation for our tour tomorrow. Pinapunta kami ng school para last meeting daw. The meeting starts at 9 and early ako nakarating. I swear it's not because a certain someone reminded me not to be late. It's just that gusto ko lang maging early for today.

I settled on one of the front chairs in the meeting room. It's still 8:45 at medyo kunti pa lang ang nandito. Filipino time is real I guess? I noticed a commotion outside the room. Well I said meeting room pero it's really just a normal classroom. Which means it has open windows and two open doors. Lumingon ako sa window katapat ng inuupuan ko. Hindi naman ako marites, pero it's really noisy outside so I got curious. I heard teasings, ohhhhhs and yeeeeiiisss and anything you would hear if someone is being teased romantically. I smiled. May ganito pa pala sa college?

I looked around to see who's the receiving end of those cheers. My smile faltered when I saw the girl who was smiling at the guy holding out a flower. Stacey accepted it. I looked away and tried to focus on my phone like it's the most interesting thing in the world.

Ahhh. Syempre may manliligaw siya. I mean she is THE Stacey. Of course maraming nagkakandarapa sa kanya. I furrowed my brow as the teasing intensified outside. Ang ingay! Jejemon.

The bell rang and everyone settled in the room. The meeting started and it was all about reminders and important things on tour. My focus is in front, trying to shake off the lingering feelings I have for what happened outside just a few minutes ago.

Nakatulala ako sa prof na nagdidiscuss ng itinerary.

"Okay class you can move now." the prof said. Pero di ko naintindihan kung anong move. Tapos na ba ang meeting? Someone tapped my shoulder. I looked at her and smiled.

"Excuse me, dyan po ako uupo." she said and gestured to my seatmate. "Pair ko kasi siya." my seatmate replied. I stood up confused and looked around only to find my classmates scrambling to find seats. Maayos naman na upo namin kanina ah?

"Faster guys." the prof instructed.
"Po?" I asked out of pure confusion.

She raised her brow as she looked at me.
"Di ka ba nakikinig miss Robles? I said go sit with your buddy." she said and settled on her chair upfront, reminding the students to settle down quickly. Naiwan akong mag isang nakatayo. Laro ba to? Now I have to sit with her! Well sanay naman na ako ma ignore niya. Pero di ko alam kung makakaya ko yung awkwardness na magkatabi kami pero di nagpapansinan.

I looked at the back chairs and found Stacey sitting on one of them, beside her is an empty seat and on her table is a bouquet of flowers. Nagtama ang paningin namin pero agad din akong umiwas. Well I did before she can. Linunok ko ang natitirang poot. Poot? Haha. I gathered my strength and quickly moved to sit beside her, seeing as miss MICE is now raising a brow at me. Eto na nga po.

As I settled, I tried so hard not to notice the awkward air around us. Jho sa harap ang tingin! Maingay ang paligid namin, almost everyone is chatting with their buddy. Well that was the task given, or so I assumed dahil walang reaction si miss MICE sa ingay. Siguro this is the part of the meeting where the pairs would talk kasi bukas na ang tour and our responsibility as a pair starts.

Silence. Awkward. Nothing. It was the most awkward time of my life. I heard her shift and rustle on her chair. Must be the flowers, water and notes she has on her table. Yan kasi, magsusulat naman pala, naglalagay pa ng bulaklak. She is probably struggling, looking for space so she can write.

It was awkward. Other students are noisy. It was hot. Stacey is still shuffling with her things on the table. Irritation is starting to bubble inside me. I furrowed my brow and reached for my phone. I typed my message and sent it.

To: Sevilleja buddy system
You can put the flowers on my table.

Ping. I looked at Stacey when she stopped rustling. Her gaze fixed on her phone, reading my notification. Her lips parted and her gaze shifted on me. She looked genuinely confused, her face asking. Then she replied. Please don't make this more awkward than it already is. Sa harap ka ulit tingin Jho!

My phone vibrated and it's probably her reply. Nilingon ko siya saglit at nakita kong nakanguso siya, nagpipigil ng ngiti. Ano na naman ba nireply niya? I faced the front and checked my phone while sipping on my water.

Sevilleja buddy system
Okay
Thanks love 💕

I choked on my water. I muffled my cough with my hands and faced the opposite side of where Stacey is seated. Tang ina nambibigla na naman! I can feel my whole face burning. Ano bang ginagawa mo Stacey! Ang tapang mo ah. I can hear her giggling. Tawang tawa lang?

Ping. Another notification. Di pa talaga tapos ah.

Sevilleja buddy system
Ganyan ka pala kiligin love ah?

What the fuck talaga! Now I can feel my whole body burning, if that is even possible. Nakakahiya lang talaga. Pero wag kang magpatalo Jho! Mahina si Stacey. Kaya mo to.

To: Sevilleja buddy system
Ikaw na yan love eh💕

Kalma ka muna Jho. Hiding my embarrassment, I faced her with a teasing smirk. Sana gumana.

Nagtama ang paningin namin. But it was fast. I didn't even get to see her reaction. Tumalikod siya at tumayo.

"Excuse me miss MICE, may I go to the toilet po?" she asked. The whole room went silent. I saw how the teacher was so confused, she didn't even get the chance to answer when Stacey just straight up left the classroom.

Murmurs, and then the whole classroom was silently laughing because who the heck is miss MICE? Pero mabalik kay Stacey. Nagalit ba yun? Ba't ba parang ayaw niya talaga sa akin? Ayos lang naman kami sa chat. We even have inside jokes specifically the 'love 💕 '. Ah basta bahala na.

"Well that's all for today, don't forget our reminders. I know excited kayo, but don't forget that this is an academic tour. And please remember to be responsible with your buddy and with your actions on the tour. Remember na dala niyo ang pangalan ng school. That's all, you may all go." Miss MICE said.

Soon the classroom fell silent with only me and Stacey's things left behind. Asan na ba yun? I stood up and looked outside the window. Waiting outside was ate Aiah and Sheena. They looked my way and so I waved at them.

"Jho have you seen Staku?" ate Aiah asked nang makalapit na sila sa akin.
"Hi ate ko Jho" Sheena greeted.

"Nag cr ate. Kanina pa nga yun eh. Di nga ako makaalis kasi andito pa mga gamit niya." I answered and gestured towards Stacey's things. My face soured when I saw the flower.

"Ahhh, may lakad ka pa Jho?" tanong ni ate Aiah.

"Hindi siya lakad, pero I need to go and pack up for tomorrow eh"

"Hala ka ate Jho. Bukas na kayo aalis tas ngayon ka pa mag pa pack?" oa talaga ni Shee kahit kailan.

"Wala kang pasalubong" I said as I stuck my tongue out.

"Ate Aiah oh" bunso card na naman. Bunso din naman ako ah.

"Ate Aiah oh" I said mimicking her actions. Napatawa si ate Aiah.

"Mga baliw. Sige na Jho, kami na bahala dito. Baka maiwan ka pa sa tour niyo. Pa Hi nalang sa Cebu for me Jho. Next month pa kasi ako makakauwi."

"Sure sure yan te Aiah, thanks ah" I said and hugged the both of them.

Gabi na nang matapos ako mag pack. Well nag lunch kasi muna ako tapos nag watch ng isang movie. Tapos nag pack. Tapos nanood ulit ng series while packing. Tapos nag dinner at nag pack ulit. I'm this close to giving up packing. Sobrang tamad talaga. Now complete na ang checklist ko na binigay ni Stacey about things to bring.

Tapos na akong mag shower at matutulog na sana ako nang mag vibrate ang phone ko.

Sevilleja buddy system
5:00 am sa airport na dapat, don't be late.

Ohh? Formal. Well that's fine. Nagalit kaya talaga siya don? Bakit naman?

To: Sevilleja buddy system
Okay

Okay na to. Matulog ka na Jho. Gigising ka pa maaga bukas. I was wondering though, nanaginip ako ulit for the third time last week. On friday specifically. Syempre broken ulit ako non. Dumagdag pa na magkachat kami. Bakit kasi ganon? Nakakamiss talaga sobra. Di ko naintindihan. But that time around, di na ako nag effort na mag move on. Pero wait. Friday? I noticed na sa Friday ako palaging nananaginip ng ganoon. Tomorrow is Friday. Mananaginip kaya ulit ako? That would be bad news. Because how will I act pag nanaginip talaga ako? Tapos bumalik yung sobrang sakit na feeling na may na mimiss ka. Tapos magkasama pa kami sa iisang kwarto? Awa nalang talaga.

It was 5:05 when I arrived at the meeting places. My classmates are already chilling on the chairs designated for the waiting passengers. I looked around to find Stacey sitting on one of it. She has her shades on, arms resting on her stomach and her back leaning comfortably.

I quietly sat beside her, afraid I might wake her up if ever she was sleeping.

"You're late." she said without even turning my way.

I cleared my throat and answered "Just 5 minutes."

"Still late." she said and sat properly.

"Nyenye"
"Tsk"

Bahala ka dyan.

Seatmates kami ni Stacey sa airplane. Was it awkward? Of course it would be. Buti nalang tulog ako buong ride. Now na sa bus na kami papuntang hotel kung saan kami mag s stay. And syempre seatmates parin kami. Would it be awkward? Of course it would be. So dapat akong makatulog para iwas awkward.

Stacey and I were standing on the aisle of the second to the last row of the bus. I heard from ate Aiah that the view around here is nice kaya gusto ko sana ng window seat. Uupo na sana ako when Stacey held my wrist. Napatingin ako sa kamay niya at binitawan niya ito.

"Ako dyan." she said and move past me so she could occupy the seat.

"Tsk" is all I could say. Gusto ko pa sana makipag away kaso inaantok parin ako. Tinapos ko kasi yung series na pinapanood ko kagabi. I had 4 hours of sleep. Buti nga di ako naiwan sa tour.

I settled on the chair. Napansin kong nag strech si Stacey ng balikat pero yung isa lang, yung sa side ko. Weird, ano na naman nakain nito. Nagkatinginan kami at tinaasan niya ako ng kilay.

"What?" she asked. So mataray naman this girl.

I shook my head and put on shades so I can sleep.

"This is your fault" she mumbled, halos di ko na marinig. Ano na namang kasalan ko? Dedma. Bahala ka dyan matutulog muna ako.

That was my plan. Pero mukhang hindi ata nag co cooperate ang mata ko. I'm on the aisle na chair so my view was the interior of the bus and a little bit of the front road. Makikita ko naman sana yung view sa labas. Pero yun ay kung willing akong nakaharap kay Stacey. And I don't have that kind of will. So what I did was to look at the view na na sa kabilang side. Which is may dalawang classmates ako na tulog.

It's true that Cebu really is beautiful. The balance of nature and buildings is just right. Makakakita ka ng bundok sa likod ng mga matatayog na building.

I removed my shades to get a clearer view of the colors sorrounding the place.

"Kala ko ba matutulog ka?" napalingon ako kay Stacey. She still have her shades on.

"Pake mo?" I said at tumingin ulit sa view kanina.

"Do you like her that much na tinititigan mo pa siya matulog?"

Huh?

"Huh? Pinagsasabi mo na naman dyan?" ibinalik ko ang tingin sa kanya, genuinely curious.

"Si Kisha, do you like her?" she said and pouted at the direction where I was staring earlier. There was two girl sleeping. Isa nakatalikod sa amin at isa nakaharap sa akin, the girl in the aisle too. Oh Kisha pala pangalan niyan?

"Delulu ka teh. Sa labas ako nakatingin. Nang aagaw ka kasi ng window seat." I said amused.

"Edi dito ka na tumingin." again, huh?

"Huh?"

"Kunti nalang iisipin kong bingi ka talaga."

"Eh bakit naman kasi kita titignan?"

She laughed, yung tawang nakakainis na parang may nasabi akong mali.

"Dito kasi." she said and pointed at the window beside her, still laughing.

Uminit ang pisngi ko nang marealize ang nangyari. The fuck Jho! Ilang kahihiyan pa ba ang mararanasan mo?

"Pangit" I said and put my shades back on as I tried to sleep to recover from the embarrassment.

Tangina talaga. Sige lang love, makakaganti rin ako.

I looked back at Kisha and sighed. Sana itong si Kisha nalang ang nakapair ko. Edi sana di ako mamamatay ng maaga dahil sa kaba. Kaba? Sus. Wala to. Mag asawa lang kayo sa panaginip. Miss mo lang yung siya sa panaginip. You just have to learn how to separate dreams from reality Jho. Pero.

I smiled. 'Love'
It just feels so peaceful. Yung panaginip na gusto kung maging totoo kung sakali. Kahit hindi si Stacey. It could be anyone as long as we're that intimate, comfortable and peaceful. Nagkataon lang na si Stacey. Right? If kahit sino man yung napanaginipan ko, ganon parin naman mafe feel ko di ba? It doesn't matter who. I would still think about love. Right? Diba?

Love