Breaks (regulus)
Regulus was sitting in a compartment with Evan, and Barty. Pandora had wanted to sit with her ravenclaw friends and dorcas had joined her, regulus couldn’t blame her they all looked depressed.
He had thought everyone felt this way about their family before but Sirius had told him that James’ family wasn’t like that, peters too. When Phoebe had hung out with them she talked about her family like they were good. It made him burn with jealousy sometimes when the thoughts crossed his mind- but he ignored it.
Barty who was normally constantly talking was sitting next to regulus with his head in his arms. Regulus stared at him deep in thought when all of a sudden the boy shot up and grumbled something under his breath.
“I hate my dad.” He said, he looked proud to say it outloud. Regulus wished briefly that he would ever be able to do that.
Barty looked between him and Evan, “alright you both looked depressed I can’t be the only one with shitty parents c’mon.”
Evan sat up a little straighter, regulus wondered if it was different for pureblood families- more specifically the ‘old fashioned ones’ to talk behind their parents back.
“My mums okay dads almost never there.” He said his voice just above a whisper.
For some reason that made regulus even more jealous, he wished his mother was at least ‘okay’.
The boys turned to regulus who pointedly remained silent.
Their gaze burned with a lingering question, regulus shook it off and turned to look at the window. He could feel bartys stare still but he couldn’t be bothered to answer.
Instead he thought of the scars that lingered on his back, his chest, the ones that had to be healed the muggle way to teach him a lesson. Red stained sheets from when kreacher was commanded not to heal him. Forcing himself not to scream when red poured down his body, or when his brother was grinding his teeth together when his mother took her anger out on him.
He felt a tear drop onto the table, he wiped it away hoping neither of them had seen it before wiping his face quickly. He stared out the window ignoring the pain in his neck, a hand grabbed his shoulder and before he could stop himself he flinched. He didn’t turn away from the window. Barty grabbed his shoulder more forcefully and practically dragged him into his arms.
Regulus buried his face into his shoulder willing himself not to cry. Then he remembered what he was doing and reluctantly removed himself from bartys arms, he made eye contact with Evan and immediately stared at the table.
He knew barty was staring at him, Evan too probably. The only other person he had ever cried in front of- who didn’t curse him was Sirius. He let out a shaky breath and stiffened when he felt barty leaning over slighting to whisper something he knew regulus would hear.
“It’s okay to feel Regulus.” Barty spoke softly. The words ringed through regulus’ mind for the rest of the train ride. He didn’t dare speak again.
It had been a while since regulus’ “breakdown”, the boy still hadn’t spoke, barty and Evan had spoken a little bit- regulus couldn’t remember what about.
The train stopped and regulus let out a deep sigh. The compartment door opened and Sirius stood in front of him, looking paler than normal. Regulus grabbed his trunk and followed him out. He hoped that Bellatrix would come again but instead he found their mother towards the front of the crowd looking at children rejoining their families with a cold stare.
He looked behind him and saw barty following his line of sight and to his surprise barty was glaring at regulus’ mother.
Barty stood distantly away but was still watching them. Walburga walked up to them and dug her sharp nails into regulus’ shoulder.
She didn’t bother doing the same to Sirius- he suspected it was because she didn’t want to make a scene in public.
Just before they apparated regulus made eye contact with barty, and felt a sense of understanding between them.
Then with a pop they were “home”.
“Sirius go to your room.” She said disdain clear in her voice.
Sirius was suddenly alert looking at regulus then at her, regulus wasn’t sure exactly what he had done but he didn’t want Sirius to be hurt too.
“Just go” He had whispered quietly enough only Sirius would hear.
Sirius looked skeptically between the two before he nodded at regulus. He walked up the stairs quieter than normal.
Walburga started walking to the library and regulus followed her. The library was where they were normally punished.
Regulus hid a wince as he entered. His face was cold and his eyes were blank, he wondered if he looked like his mother.
“You’ve been talking to that crouch boy.” She didn’t ask. She knew.
Regulus looked up at her face. He wondered what she would look like if she smiled. If she wasn’t always glaring.
“Yes maman.” Both his parents were French, but despite walburga being his cousin her grandmother was Japanese, from what regulus had heard she was an “exotic side piece” and her grandfather was having an affair with her when walburgas father was born. He was still a pureblood and married a white women, because despite having discrimination against muggles, muggleborns etc. most purebloods felt the need that being white was somehow superior.
He suspects that’s why the twins mother rarely comes to ‘family events’. Three generations the Japanese features faded, regulus looked more like their mother than Sirius did. Walburga preferred maman because it was French. Because it earned her more respect. Regulus wasn’t entirely sure but it was best to use it if he was in a situation like this one.
“And why do you feel the need to talk to a bloodtraiter?” She asked walking closer.
“He’s in Slytherin maman, he hated his father. He’s not a blood traitor.”
Walburga took her wand out of her sleeve and towered over him. “You could have wrote a letter.”
Those were the last words he heard before most of it turned into a blur.
He remembered a few cutting curses, a few experimental ones and one particularly deep cut on his ankle.
He laid still for a second. Staring at the ceiling, but as he felt blood rushing into his sock he decided he better get up.
He couldn’t remember if he screamed or not, he throat felt raw so he might’ve.
He rolled up his leg sleeve before looking over the wound.
It was deep- yes but it wasn’t life or death. He took his shoes off and pulled the other sock up over the cut before putting his shoes back on.
Then he decided it wouldn’t hurt to try. “Kreacher.”
“Master regulus.” Kreacher said bowing slightly.
“Did she- ban you from healing me?” His voice sounded strange.
Kreacher hesitated. Not a good sign.
“No but she said nothing of me bringing you something to help.”
Regulus nodded as kreacher disappeared. He hoped Sirius wouldn’t come down soon, he would rather not talk about it.
He pulled his socks down and looked at the cut, it was still leaking blood but slower and less.
He saw a hex of some sort that had made his skin burn on his right shoulder. He winced as he pulled his shirt down. Fuck. It wasn’t that bad technically and would definitely be mostly healed by the Time he left but still.
He felt another cut somewhere near his elbow but didn’t see any blood in the sim room so he ignored it. Anything else she had used would’ve disappeared by now. She had found a couple of temporary “add on” spells, regulus didn’t fully understand it.
Suddenly a pop broke out and kreacher appeared. He held a bowl of water, a rag, a needle? And string.
Kreacher placed the items in front of him, asking if he would need anything else before disappearing again.
Regulus sighed. He rolled down his sock again, it looked like the blood flow had mostly stopped. He dipped the rag in the water and wiped away the blood. It took a few minutes but eventually he was done.
Then he looked at the needle and decided he didn’t want to risk getting Sirius so he tied the string the best he could and started working on it.
When he was done he took the socks off tossing them close to him. He slipped his shoes back on, grabbed the various things besides the socks and the bowl and started walking upstairs. He decided he would ask kreacher to take care of it once he was in his room.
When he opened his door he saw Sirius. He was sitting on his bed just staring at him.
“How bad?”
Regulus shrugged and moved to sit next to him.
“Where are your socks.”
Regulus winced quietly. He took his shoes off and tilted his foot so Sirius could see the cut.
Sirius gasped a little before muttering under his breath.
“You what sewed it yourself?” Sirius asked staring at regulus after he examined it.
Regulus nodded blankly too tired to respond.
“Alright anything else.
Regulus took his shirt off and watched as Sirius looked at the burn.
“Shit I’ll look into healing spells for that, I’m not sure what I’ll be able to find kreacher can’t heal you?”
Regulus shook his head causing Sirius to sigh.
“Okay do you want me to stay in here tonight and cast a muffliato, I probably won’t sleep much tonight anyways.”
Regulus stiffly nodded not wanting to wake up to Sirius “quietly” checking on him.
He changed into his pajamas quickly not bothering to shower before going to bed.
Sirius was already laying down in his bed, doing nothing which was a slightly odd sight.
A week later Bellatrix was visiting. Her long black curls were a bit messier than normal. Her eyes were cold as she talked with regulus’ mother but once she saw him the cold left for a split second.
Regulus left the room to go to the library.
Not the library where he had been the previous week, that was a smaller library . This library was the main one. Regulus found it comforting how easy it was to hide in here.
Sirius had found a spell that could help with the burn but not a lot, the cut had to heal the muggle way. Regulus was going to have to take the stitches out soon but he was resenting the thought.
It didn’t seem infected for the most part. Regulus suspected that Walburga didn’t heal them or let anyone heal them because she wanted them to be stronger.
Regulus found a book of dark arts that looked interesting enough and sat down on a couch towards the back of the room. It was hard to relax here, which caused regulus to almost always have perfect posture. It was irritating to have to keep your back straight while you were reading a book.
Regulus heard footsteps and sat up straighter as he looked around. Bellatrix appeared through one of the shelves.
She sat down next to him tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“How are You?” She asked,
“Fine.”
That clearly wasn’t very believable from the way her eyebrows furrowed. Walburga must’ve mentioned something.
“Show me regulus i can heal it.” Her voice was always soft.
Regulus rolled up his pants again feeling humiliated. He heard her let in a sharp breath.
“Alright I’m going to take the stitches out then I can heal it, it will probably scar though okay?”
Regulus nodded stiffly. Th truth was it was very hard not to limp with it, he could deal with the pain for the most part but he couldn’t under any circumstances limp.
She took the stitches out fast, regulus watched as a small amount of blood beaded through his skin.
She muttered something under her breath, regulus felt lightheaded. He gripped tightly onto the arm of the couch and grit his teeth as hard as he could.
When she was finished she bandaged it. She turned to regulus and hugged him.
He was so young, so young were the only thoughts in her head. She blinked away the tears in her eyes and held on just a little bit tighter.
They stayed like that for a few moments. Then she let go. She smiled softly at him, his gray eyes seemed just a little bit warmer.
“Alright c’mon it’s time for dinner.” She said helping him up.
Dinner was awkward. Regulus and Sirius didn’t speak. Bellatrix made a few comments, Walburga answered a few of them and Orion just nodded along.
Regulus didn’t eat much, Sirius did.
When dinner was over Walburga said her goodbyes and left, Orion retreated to his study.
Bellatrix hugged regulus and Sirius goodbye and left.
Regulus went to his room and stared at the walls until he fell asleep.
And then the cycle continued.
Walburga had been teaching them the beginnings of wand-less magic, and wordless magic. If either of them got it wrong they were punished. She wasn’t a very good teacher, always snapping when Sirius asked a question. Throwing something when something made her mad.
They would be leaving in three days, regulus unlike when he originally left was excited. He missed his, friends. The thought was strange in his his head.
Regulus’ cut was healed, but it did scar, it was a thin line now, barley noticeable unless In harsh lighting. His burn was healed mostly but most likely wouldn’t be all the way healed by the time he went back to hogwarts. Him and Sirius had only had temporary curses used on them since. Sirius got in trouble more, but not as much as he normally would.
Learning the wordless magic was hard, weirdly enough it was about control and calmness, she taught them breathing exercises and meditation. Regulus wondered how hard it must’ve been for her to learn with her short temper.
Now regulus and Sirius were in Sirius’ room, they were doing their schoolwork since their parents had left for something important suddenly.
“Reg, do you know how to do this shit?” Asked Sirius who had been staring at his work for a few moments.
Regulus grabbed the paper, it was questions about the background of the spell accio.
“I have a book about this” he said.
He walked over to his bed and looked through the stacks of books underneath it. The book didn’t have a name and was aged.
He handed it to Sirius, who spent a few minutes looking through it before writing something down.
Regulus was working on history of magic, basic stuff that he already knew.
They spent an hour working on the work, before both boys were done.
Sirius was sprawled out on his bed where as regulus was quietly reading.
“Wanna play a game?” Sirius asked getting bored.
The smaller boy nodded, watching Sirius shuffle through his trunk.
“It’s called uno I’ll explain the rules, you can’t tell mother and father though it’s a muggle game, okay?”
“Okay how does it work?”