Remus my beloved
Regulus’ pov
Regulus and Remus might seemed like an odd pairing. A quiet, mean Slytherin with a death glare and a tall Gryffindor with scars all over his body and a smirk that made people feel dizzy.
But they worked. Merlin, they worked very well together.
Regulus was in his third year and Remus in his fourth when the older boy plopped down in the chair in front of him in the library and started telling him how bad the book in Regulus’ hands was.
A day later he was back, dropping a pile of books on Regulus’ table, ordering him to read some “true masterpieces”.
Regulus didn’t like him at first, just like he didn’t like most people. But Remus kept coming back, laughing at his sarcastic comments and making fun of his handwriting. Normally, Regulus hated spending time with people. They were unpredictable and nosy and mostly looked at Regulus with disgust. But it was… easy for Regulus to spend time with Remus. There were no expectations, he could just exist around him.
There were hours of silence between them, both absorbed in their schoolwork or a book. There was Regulus crying and Remus rubbing his back. There was laughter and pranks on his brother. But it was never weird.
When Remus had finally broken down in front of him and told him about his lycanthropy, it was only met by an “I know” and a bar of chocolate.
Regulus couldn’t be more grateful to have friends like Remus in his life.
So when Remus arrived at the Potters’ house the next morning, he hugged him. Which was a very rare occurrence, even for Remus.
Then he made fun of his grandpa sweater and Remus asked him if he really fainted like a damsel in distress after falling out of the fireplace.
After Regulus said his hellos, James drew Remus in his arms, whispering something in his ear that made his friend grin. Then Remus shook Mrs. and Mr. Potter’s hands before moving on to Sirius.
Sirius had been suspiciously quiet this whole time, staring at Remus with a faint blush on his cheeks. Reall, no one could blame his brother. Remus was very handsome, all tan skin and freckles with a mischievous glint in his eyes and a smirk on his lips. His scars and the looming height made his somewhat mysterious, which seemed to attract people even more.
But unfortunately for all his admirers, he only had eyes for Regulus’ idiotic brother, who was still staring at Remus.
Regulus smiled. “You look nice, Remus. Did you get taller?” Remus, the oblivious fucker, shrugged and missed the way Sirius’ cheeks turned even redder. Pathetic.
Mrs. Potter clapped her hands. “Alright, boys! Let’s get Remus settled in. Show him where he’ll be staying?” Sirius nodded, then made Remus follow him upstairs.
James looked at Regulus with both eyebrows raised and they shared a knowing look. Their friends were so in love it was getting unbearable.
They followed his brother and Remus upstairs, finding them in Sirius’ room. There was a mattress on the floor for Remus to sleep on and he had already put his suitcase in a corner. Remus was leaning over the desk, marvelling at Sirius’ sketches.
Both Black brothers seemed to have an artistic streak. While Sirius did like to draw, music was his passion. He could play a multitude of instruments, from classical piano to electric guitar. He made the music feel alive, expressing himself through it.
It was kind of nice to see his brother enjoy something so much.
“These are amazing. Sirius, how is it possible that you can play the guitar like a god and also paint like this? That is so not fair”, Remus states, flicking through pages of sketchbooks.
Yeah, yeah. Sirius could draw alright. But it was not in an arrogant way when Regulus said that painting and drawing was more his own area of expertise.
Regulus had always liked to paint. It was freeing. It was pouring your soul onto paper, letting a piece of yourself exist outside of your body. Giving your fears their own place to live.
Regulus painted like his life depended on it because at one point it had. Without discovering his love for art he might not have made it through all the years of pain.
Not that he showed his art to anyone. Occasionally Remus or his brother, when he was feeling absolutely confident in his work. Very rarely Pandora, Evan and Barty. But most people never get to see the beautiful pieces he created. He just didn’t trust them enough to.
Sirius was the complete opposite. He leaned forward from where he was sitting on his bed, eager for praise from his friends. “Pads, you are an amazing musician and artist. Everyone knows that. We love you for it”, James said with a proud grin.
Sirius beamed. Regulus could already picture him filling stadiums, showing his music to the world.
Sirius and James began to talk excitedly about Merlin knows what and Remus kept on looking at the art. He grabbed a little green sketchbook that was lying underneath the other, open ones. “NO”, Sirius shouted and was on his feet in an instant. He snatched the sketchbook out of his hands before Remus could process what happened.
Sirius looked terribly embarrassed, hiding the little book behind his back with wide eyes and red cheeks. “You can’t look at that.”
Remus furrowed his eyebrows. “Why? Is that were you keep your drawings of Slughorn in sexy underwear?”
Regulus snorted and James started laughing.
“It’s.. private. I’m sorry, I can’t- I can’t show you”, Sirius muttered averting his eyes.
Hm. Weird.
The conversation moved on from there and they all went back downstairs after a while. They made themselves comfortable in the living room, Remus and James on the armchairs and Sirius and Remus on the couch. They were sitting way too close for it to seem casual but maybe that was just Regulus’ opinion.
Mrs. Potter made them tea and came to sit with them and read while the boys chatted, Regulus was just sitting there comfortably, not feeling like talking but appreciating the company.
Also he was very happy to look at James when the other boy wasn’t looking. Merlin’s kidney, how was it fair for him to look so good. Regulus’ stomach did a little dance every time James laughed. He was a little distracted by his arms, his biceps flexing when he moved in his chair and stretching the fabric of his shirt.
When he finally focused on the conversation again, they were talking about going on a little trip to a lake nearby tomorrow.
And the mental image of James in swimming trunks made Regulus feel dizzy. “What do you think Regulus?”, his brother asked him and Regulus was so very glad that Sirius couldn’t read his mind. “We could bring some food, have a picnic. Swim in the lake. You can bring a book. It’ll be great!”, his brother continued enthusiastically.
“Why not”, Regulus shrugged. Because he liked the idea of doing nice things with his friends, not because he liked the idea of a shirtless James.
Later that evening, he waited until Remus went to take a shower before slipping into his brother’s room. “Show me the Remus sketchbook. I want to see it, pleaseeeee”, he said before staring to open random drawers and searching for the green little book.
“The what now? Are you crazy? I don’t have a Remus sketchbook. You are insane. Why would I-“
“Found it!”, Regulus exclaimed as he spotted the small sketchbook. He opened it. Just as he suspected, it was filled with drawings upon drawings of Remus.
“Cute.” Regulus flipped through the pages, taking in the sketches. Remus reading next to the lake. Remus sleeping on the couch. Close ups of his face. And a variety of drawings of his hands. So many drawings of his hands.
“Eww. I didn’t want to know that you have a thing for his hands.”
Sirius started to wrestle with his arms and tried to get the book back. “I do not! You bastard, little shit, give it back!” Regulus turned out of his grip.
“Now what is that.” He was looking at a drawing of Remus, apparently fresh out of the shower with nothing but a towel on.
It was different from the other drawings. All the other were painted secretly when Remus wasn’t looking but this was drawn from memory. This moment couldn’t have lasted more than a few minutes.
“Oh, my dearest brother. Has the image of a freshly showered Remus burned itself so deeply into your memory that you could paint it this accurately without reference?”, Regulus teased with a delighted grin. “That image must have not left your head for days. Wow, it’s actually quite impressive how realistic the sketch is. Idiot.”
Regulus laughed as Sirius slapped his arm before finally getting a hold of the little book. “That is none of your business and so not true. Motherfucker", Sirius mumbled, his face as red as a tomato.
“Sure, sure. I love you too, brother. But Merlin’s sake, just ask him out already.” Sirius shot him a death glare and shooed him out of his room.
He chuckled on his way back to his own room. And if he only suspected the book to be filled with sketches of Remus because he kept a similar one dedicated to drawings of James, no one needed to know.
Especially not James or his brother.
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The walk to the lake didn’t take very long, for which Regulus was glad because the sun was beaming with a force that made Regulus worry about getting burnt, even after two layers of sunscreen. He had a hat on, that Sirius had to force on his head and Remus made fun of relentlessly, and was hiding behind a pair of sunglasses.
Because it was pretty early in the day, the temperature was still very pleasant. Remus was carrying a bag filled with food and James was holding a picnic blanket. All four of them had towels slung over their shoulders and Sirius and James were laughing.
James seemed to come alive under the summer sun. His skin was glowing and his smile was blinding. Regulus had to look away.
When they arrived, it took James and Sirius about two seconds to drop everything they were holding, wiggle out of their shirts and sprint to the lake. They jumped in and splashed Remus and Regulus in the process, who rolled their eyes before setting up the picnic blanket and making themselves comfortable with the books they brought.
They had about five minutes of peace, listening to the birds chirp and Sirius and James screaming and giggling like little children, before Sirius decided that Remus needed to swim too.
Regulus was sure that he just wanted to see him wear less clothes, but oh well, not that Regulus was any better with James.
Remus followed Sirius’ orders, because he was in fact a love sick puppy, and Regulus went back to reading. Well, about 10% reading and 90% watching the water drip down James’ torso.
Stupid quidditch players and their stupid muscles.
And then, James came over and asked him to please come join them. And Regulus was nothing but a weak, weak man. How was he supposed to say no when James’ normally unruly hair was twisting in perfect curls because it was wet?
Regulus didn’t stand a chance. So he got up, pulled his shirt over his head and walked to the lake, the grass tickling his bare feet.
And because he was Regulus Black, he took a very graceful dive into the clear water. The coolness felt amazing on his heated skin and he enjoyed the silence underwater before emerging again.
Remus clapped and Regulus almost felt a little proud. Then he caught James eyes. James was still standing on the grass, staring at him with his mouth slightly open. Whatever that meant.
Then James dived into the water too and the weird moment was over. They swum and they lay on the grass and enjoyed the sun. They jumped into the lake whenever they needed to cool down. The picnic was delicious and Regulus read three chapters of his book. They talked about everything and nothing, the light chatter a welcome background noise for Regulus.
Midday came and went and suddenly it was 6 o’clock in the evening and the air was cooling down. They gathered their stuff and made their way home, still relishing in the wonderful atmosphere only a summer day could bring.
Regulus was never a fan of summer. He was always sweaty and sticky and the sun was too bright for his eyes.
So it came as a surprise that he actually enjoyed their little trip. It was nice to sit in the shadow of a tree and read. He liked the coolness of the water.
Oh, and James.
Wasn’t it always James? James made him feel welcome. James was kind, laughed and jumped, told him jokes and brought an extra water bottle for him. He was so… good. Regulus didn’t know what to do with this.
He wasn’t really used to dealing with so much good. The kindness was almost overwhelming.
And it was stupid, really. But in Regulus’ head, James had been the bad guy for a very long time. James, who took his brother away from him. It was hard for Regulus to get to really know James because there was always a little voice in his head telling him that James couldn’t be trusted.
They arrived at the house, Sirius and James immediately telling Mrs. Potter about their day while bouncing excitedly. Regulus went to take a shower and thought about a lot of things.
For example, maybe he could fit in here. One day. Somehow. He didn’t feel as much as an intruder anymore. He thought about how glad he was that Remus was here, it took some of the attention away from Regulus and he felt safe around Remus.
And he did definitely not think of the weird look James gave him after he dived into the lake. And even less did he think of James’ fucking sixpack.