Rescue
It had been a few days since Remus and Lily’s uncomfortable encounter in the common room. It was now a Friday night and Gryffindor had just won a quidditch match against Slytherin. Remus used to find the post quidditch game parties a little annoying. But now he loved them. They were pretty much the only time Remus could leave the dorm without getting weird looks or hearing whispers as he walked past. He didn’t blame people though. It probably was odd seeing a student walking around the castle absolutely wasted on a random Wednesday morning. But at these parties everyone was drunk, so he fit in perfectly. He normally hung around the fire listening to random people drunk rant about their lives. He finally opened the bathroom door and began to walk about, downing a bottle a fire whisky before leaving when he almost ran straight into Sirius.
“Oh crap. Remus, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were in here.” Sirius seemed nervous to be in Remus’ presence.
“Don’t sweat it Black.” Remus spoke calmly, trying to hide the fact he was already wasted.
“I- um, well er- I actually wanted to talk to you.” Sirius could barely string the sentence together.
“What’s up?” Remus had a cool tone.
“I just wanted to make sure you were ok. You’ve been bunking classes, and not really talking to anyone.” Sirius seemed genuinely concerned.
“I’m fine, just got sick of playing the ‘model student’ role.” Remus tried to act nonchalant.
“Alright, have a good night.” Sirius smiled.
Remus slid around Sirius and out the door.
****
It had gotten late. Almost everyone had gone up to bed. Remus had been sitting with Marlene next to the fire. She was the only one who would hang out with him during these parties and not try to get him to sober up.
“I’m going to head to bed Rems. You should go too.” Marlene smiled.
“I’ll just finish my drink then head up.” Remus smiled back.
Marlene turned around and walked up to her dorm. Remus enjoyed sitting in the common room. The fire was nice and warm, it felt safe, and it just overall had a friendly, calm vibe. Although with the fire slowly dying down and the loud howling of the wind the friendliness and calmness of the room slowly drifted away. Remus didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the change of environment that caused it, but Remus found himself being flooded with the memories of him and Sirius. And what Sirius had done. Though Remus had gallons of alcohol running through his veins he was still wise enough to know that it was time to go to bed. Before he did or said something he would regret.
Remus downed the last bit of his drink. He turned around and began to walk towards the stairs. In the dimly lit confines of the Gryffindor common room, the shadows danced like spectres in the night, casting a veil of darkness over the fractured souls that lingered within. Remus Lupin, once a beacon of wisdom and warmth, now found himself drowning in a sea of despair, his spirit consumed by the twin demons of anger and alcohol.
The events of that fateful night haunted him like a recurring nightmare, the echoes of betrayal ringing in his ears like a never-ending refrain. Sirius Black, his once beloved boyfriend, had betrayed him in the cruellest of ways, his actions leading to a confrontation that had nearly cost Remus his life. He had no idea why he was thinking about that night. He didn’t know why it was so heavy on his heart. He had grabbed a bottle of fire whisky and began to drink without even realising.
As he drowned his sorrows in the bottom of another bottle, Remus's anger simmered beneath the surface like a volcano on the brink of eruption. And when he saw Sirius and Mary McDonald locked in a passionate embrace, the flames of fury ignited within him like wildfire, consuming everything in their path.
"How dare you?" Remus snarled, his words slurred with alcohol as he staggered toward them, his eyes burning with a rage born of betrayal and loss.
Sirius, for all his faults, stood his ground, his gaze meeting Remus's with a mixture of defiance and regret. "Remus, please," he pleaded, his voice tinged with sorrow. "don’t make a scene, not here at least."
But Remus would hear none of it. In that moment, all he could see was the pain etched into Sirius's face, a constant reminder of the scars that would never fully heal.
"You destroyed everything," Remus spat, his voice raw with emotion. "You destroyed us."
But Sirius, for all his bravado, could offer no defence against the storm of anger that raged within Remus's heart. Mary had slipped away at some point. Remus was left alone, face to face with the boy he had once loved. Sirius Black.
“You dumped me Remus. I have every right to move on.” Sirius’ eyes turned cold. As though he had no emotions.
“Oh, my bad. I forgot. I lost someone who didn’t care. But you. Oh, you Sirius, you lost someone that did.” Remus felt his heart shattering all over again.
“Are you kidding me Remus. You know damn well I cared. You just can’t accept the fact you threw away the one person who loved you. Fuck you.” Sirius shouted angrily, letting his emotions slip back into his eyes.
“No, Fuck you. I was good enough. But you made me believe I wasn’t.” Remus shouted. His eyes welled with tears, yet his voice still filled with anger.
Sirius had opened and closed his mouth a few times, clearly unable to find the right words to say. He eventually gave up, walking away from Remus up to the dorm, leaving Remus alone with his pain and anger. And as the alcohol flowed like poison through his veins, Remus found himself consumed by a darkness unlike anything he had ever known. Remus stood alone in the Gryffindor common room; his heart heavy with the weight of a love lost. And only a few moments after Sirius had left him alone Remus fell to the floor, breaking down. Marlene had forgotten her jacket and walked back down to find Remus on the floor, tears flowing from his eyes like waterfalls. Marlene ran over to him wrapping her arms around his shaking body protectively, holding him tight.
“Oh, Remus, you poor thing.” Marlene huffed as she ran her fingers through his hair. “Come on, let's get you up to my room.”
Luckily enough, the only person Marlene shared a room with was Lily. They helped him up onto a spare bed they had. They both layed either side of him, comforting him as he felt all the pain he had been avoiding crashing over him.
“Let us help you, Rems. Let us help you get sober.” Lily spoke softly.
“It’s too late for me to get help Lils.” Remus’ voice was shaky as tears continued to flow down his cheeks.
“It’s never too late.” Lily whispered, cupping his cheek in her hand and wiping away the tears.
Though Remus didn’t know it yet, he would carry those words with him for the rest of his life.
****
Remus woke, lying next to Marlene. Marlene was sitting up drinking a cup of coffee cautiously as to not wake him.
“Oh, you’re awake.” Lily smiled. “I have a warm cup of tea and some toast for you.”
Remus sat up leaning against the bed head. “Thank you Lils.”
“Good morning, Rem.” Marlene placed a hand on Remus’ back.
“Morning Marls.” Remus gave a tired smile.
Remus could vaguely remember the events from the previous night. He remembered yelling at Sirius. He remembered Marlene finding him crying. He remembered the words Lily spoke to him ‘it’s never too late’. He had told Lily and Marlene about the argument and the words the two boys had exchanged. About how Sirius’ words cut like knives into his heart.
“I don’t know what Sirius wants from me. I don’t know what to give him.” Remus held his head in his hands.
“Silence, because that’s all he deserves.” Lily rubbed Remus's back while speaking.
“It’s going to be ok Remus; we’ll get you sober and back to yourself.” Marlene smiled.
“That’s the problem. I don’t know who I am anymore.”
“I do.” Lily smiled.
Remus gave her a confused look.
“Who were you before he broke your heart?”