Chiyo Mihama is an annoying fuck.
This is the most popular opinion about her. It is also true. I want her dead. Everyone does. If you don’t then you are wrong.
Sakaki Sakaki usually walked to school with Chiyo. Once they actually got to school, MY GOAT AND QUEEN TOMO TAKINO kidnapped Chiyo and put her head in a plastic bag. She started choking like a stupid ass turtle.
”MMMFGH HDGDGHFBNFG”
Yukari Tanizaki, local solicitor, teacher, and raging lesbian with a constant blood alcohol level of 1.2% and is somehow not dead, laughed in the background. Today was the culture festival.
Tomo decided that today they would simulate the French revolution.
”This is a great idea. Because”
There was a FUCKING GUILLOTINE in the middle of the classroom. Osaka and Kagura had been there too, snorting some mysterious substance on Osaka’s desk.
”Execution of Chiyo-chan later.”
Chiyo SOBBED as the bag was taken off her head. Sakaki did not give two shits. She actually stopped in the middle of the road to pet a cat. Yomi was too busy being a fat fuck to come as well.
After they did some weird ass ceremony, they summoned some old ass French lady. Tomo and Yukari were about to put Chiyo in the guillotine…
”OFF WITH HER HEAD—“
”YUKARI TANIZAKI WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING.”
Yukari’s TOTALLY NOT WIFE, Minamo “Nyamo” Kurosawa SCREECHED like a hungry bird who had to feed its 5 kids. Yukari simply looked up at her and… I do not know how to describe the face I am thinking of. Do it yourself. I already write the stories. Go think of something you lazy bum.
”Chiyer death”
”Ok”
Nyamo clapped. She approves of this whole-heartedly. On the floor, Kagura had died of a substance overdose. Osaka was still alive because she just is. She took 30 seconds to actually speak.
”You”
Tomo momentarily let Chiyo go from her grip as she applauded for Osaka. But Chiyo tried to escape. Luckily, they had already boarded up the doors with 5 different passwords, barbed wires, a padlock, a rubik’s cube you had to solve, a riddle, an Undertale puzzle, a random number generator, an electric fence, 9 breeds of guard dogs, the British guards, a grizzly bear, and John Hakurei.
”WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME???”
”DIE”
Tomo screeched at her. She shoved Chiyo’s head in the guillotine hole thingy and yelled again.
“OFF WITH HER HEAD!!”
I lowkey forgot how a guillotine works. Pretend they cut her head off or something.
Turns out Chiyo is superhuman. She survived. Her disembodied head started to haunt Tomo and Yukari.
Tomo is still better though. I am correct.