Chapter 1
-SIRIUS BLACK-
Sirius wasn't stupid, he knew there was no need for this conversation, deep down he knew what the answer to his question would be, he just didn't want to believe it.
So that's how the two brothers found themselves in a secluded alley, the sounds of Hogwarts students muffled because of the distance Sirius had put between between them and the rest of the world, this was for him and Reg, only the two of them.
"Sirius, what, what, are you doing?" Regulus sighed out, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation, Sirius could tell Regulus did not want to be with him at this precise moment...
The older of the two would have winced at the frustration in his younger brothers tone, key words, would have, if he wasn't shaking in anticipation.
"Reggie, I-I need you to answer me this, and I need you to be completely honest with me, n-no messing about, alright?" Sirius said looking into Regulus' lifeless eyes, it concerned him just how tired, and dead inside Regulus had started to look, then again, Sirius had only just started paying attention, Merlin knows how long this has been going on.
Regulus only graced him with a curt nod, telling Sirius to get on with it.
"I'm being serious Regulus, really, I am," Sirius cried, placing his hands onto his brothers shoulders, shaking him slightly to be sure that he got just important this was.
That was what startled Regulus out of his trance of constant indifference, and he suddenly looked slightly confused and alarmed.
Again, sirius would have chuckled at just how quickly Regulus could switch up, if it wasn't for the subject soon to be at hand.
"Sirius, what is it, you're slightly frightening at the moment," Regulus said, tilting back, and in doing so, attempting to get out of his brothers tight grip, but that just made Sirius clutch the boy harder, in hope that his little brother was still his little brother.
"Regulus, is it true, is, is, Merlin, I can't say it..." Sirius sighed tilting his head to the cloudy, grey sky.
Regulus stiffened in Sirius' hold, and the older of two couldn't help but think of that as a bad sign.
"Is, what true?"
"Regulus....."
No response came, so Sirius brought his head back to its normal position, only to be greeted with the ugly, dark, moving tattoo that the deatheaters so stupidly branded themselves with.
Although, that wasn't the only thing that caught Sirius' intrest, before Regulus could change his mind and cover the arm back up Sirius snatched it and brought the limb closer to his face.
His eyes glistened with a sheet of unshed tears, and in the reflection of his agony was the representation of all of his brothers pain and anguish.
White and purple lines covered his baby brothers arm, from wrist to elbow, they tried to cover the awful mark, but not even they could take from the ghastly veiw of the tattoo, well, they couldn't for anyone but Sirius Orion Black the III.
Sirius raised his eyes to look into his brothers, who also seemed to be repressing tears.
"Why, why would you, Reggie, why..." Sirius whispered, harsh sobs racked through him, and he finally let his agony go, but then it kept getting replaced, over and over, until he finally clamped a hand over his mouth in a pathetic attempt of stopping his pained cries.
Regulus followed his gaze up and down his arm, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion and saddness, eyes suppressing tears.
Sirius stole a quick glance at Regulus' face and saw the confusion and apprehension plastered all over it.
"I mean both, Regulus, why would you do this to yourself, how could you let this happen, how, why, how could, fuck Reg," Sirius hiccuped, laying his forehead on his brothers arm, letting the tsunami of tears fall onto the younger.
"All you ever wanted was to fight with them, I was only trying to survive her chaos..." Regulus whispered, letting his silent tears hug his cheeks, finally letting his oppressed anger and saddness at the world go, here with his brother, alone, away from the worlds prying eyes.
"Well look how that's payed off," Sirius murmured, quiteing his now small and occasional hiccups.
Merlin, how could he miss this, all of this.
"How long..."
"I've had the mark since August..."
"No, I-I mean, the other thing," Sirius stated, looking up at Regulus, silently pleading with the other for him to just say it, trust his brother enough to say it.
Regulus looked away from Sirius and his eye contact, he stilled slightly, just enough for Sirius to be able to tell, due to his deathly grip on Regulus' arm.
"Summer you left..." Regulus stated quietly, looking anywhere but Sirius, knowing the inner turmoil the older of the two would be having at that particular moment, and he was right.
It was like a punch to the gut, his sweet baby brother started this when he left, that was three years ago...not only that but he was also a deatheater.
Before Sirius could say another word, Regulus pulled his arm out of Sirius' grasp, he then put that mask of utter indifference on again, the one Sirius had grown so accustomed to seeing across the great hall or down the corridor, he didn't even think twice about it, Regulus then sniffed, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his coat and walked away as if nothing had happened.
Sirius watched with a downcast expression, he couldn't seem to feel angry about his brother being a deatheater, or, well, he wasn't angry at Regulus...
Time's a funny thing, one moment you can be watching your baby brother take his first steps, then you'll see him being punished from the hands of your wretched mother for the first time, knowing you can't stop it, then you'll be watching his sorting, the distressed look that took over his face that was very quickly masked with one of relief when the hat called out a reluctant Slytherin, and then you'll watch him walk away from you, just like you walked away from him, just like you've always walked away from him, then you'll see the prophet, the issue that came out on the 1st of January 1980, and suddenly time won't be such a funny thing, the only peice of time you'll remember is the moment you saw those scars and that horrid tattoo on your brothers pale, ghostly, skin, and that is all you will be able to think about when someone mentions the name Regulus Arcturus Black, you won't have any other memories of him, except that moment, the moment you realised you had royaly fucked up, the moment you realised that time had escaped faster than the waves of tears that had been falling from Sirius' eyes that day, that scene will be engraved in your mind, it will burn your eyelids, and the pain you felt in that moment is the pain that will always be there, in the back of your mind, causing you constant headaches, because time had managed to slip through your fingers for the last time, and that is because you made a grave mistake, one that you can never even start to comprehend.