snape catches skk meeting up (kind of)!!! not clickbait!!!
hell's hounds (and pansy)
jokes and tricks #1: i feel like im just now noticing this but why do first years get shorter every year
bitch: i don’t really want to agree with you but you’re right
jokes and tricks #2: RIGHT?? it’s so odd
dazai’s crush: can’t relate a first year walked by me and he was taller than me
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): LAUGHED
i don't listen to my elders (dazai): wait
i don't listen to my elders (dazai) added gyaru lover.
i don't listen to my elders (dazai): there!!
dazai’s crush: ok stfu,,,
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): 😘😘😘
gyaru lover: jeez. anyways i have a question
second in command: What is it?
gyaru lover: why is there a blood stain in the corner of the gang office
bitch: is there???
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): that was me
gyaru lover: why were you bleeding out on the floor?
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): ok funny story ok
library dweller: Are you ok, Dazai?
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): ITS FUNNY STOP
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): i was dancing alright
second in command: What dance requires you to bleed out on the floor?
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): LIDTENNN
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): ok so i was listing to this song called luka luka night fever ok
dazai’s crush: IM FUCKING SOBBING NO WAY
dazai’s crush: NOOOO WAY.
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): SHUT THE FUCK UP
dazai’s crush: didn’t peg you as a luka fan
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): didn’t what me
library dweller: Who is Luka?
dazai’s crush: ....ok dazai
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): what? 😇
bitch: you didnt peg him?? that’s literally the saying dazai
dazai’s crush: HOLY FUCK LMAOOOOO
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): screenshotted 😭😭😭🙏🙏
gyaru lover: dazai oh my god??
jokes and tricks #2: thats actually insane
bitch: WHAT???
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): LAUGHED OUT LOUUUUD
i don’t listen to my elders (dazai): anyways
dazai’s crush: wait
dazai’s crush changed i don’t listen to my elders (dazai)’s name to luka stan.
luka stan: ok.
luka stan: ANYWAYS
luka stan: I WAS DANCING AND WHEN I HOPPED FORWARD
luka stan: I FELL FLAT ON MY FACE
luka stan: AND STABBED MYSELF IN THE LEG WITH MY KNIFE.
library dweller: Are you alright?
luka stan: oh yeah this was a while ago
luka stan: i actually went to the nurse for once because i ran out of bandages for it
second in command: I’m proud of you.
luka stan: bros got me blushing and kicking my feet
dazai’s crush: ew?
luka stan: you too
bitch: ew i hate gay people
dazai’s crush: this is practically exposure therapy for you then
bitch: oh
dazai’s crush: ❤️ (dazai’s probably the only gay one)
luka stan: LIES
luka stan: can you be gay pleaaaase i want a chance
dazai’s crush: not for you???
luka stan: 😿😿😿
dazai’s crush: HOLY SHIT HOLD ON
dazai’s crush: dude it smells SO GOOD in my dorm someone was cooking something.
luka stan: was it crack
luka stan: does crack even smell good
dazai’s crush: OSAMU DAZAI THERE IS NO ONE COOKING CRACK IN THE BELLEFEUILLE DORMS.
luka stan: why not
library dweller: What’s crack?
jokes and tricks #2: you’re too young to understand
library dweller: ??
jokes and tricks #1: lol
second in command: Isn’t crack drugs?
luka stan: blaise is right as always!!
luka stan: WAIT HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT
second in command: I’m assuming it’s the same stuff as the kids who snort pixie dust in the dorms when Professor Snape isn’t around.
luka stan: omg really let me in on that 🤑🤑
dazai’s crush: DONT LET HIM NEAR DRUGS PLEAAASE LAST TIME WE GAVE HIM ANY TYPE OF STIMULANT HE BURNED DOWN A BUILDING AND THEN COULDNT STOP SEEING DANGO LAYING AROUND IN MY APARTMENT.
luka stan: you’re no fun 👎👎👎👎
bitch: dango?? wtf is dango???
luka stan: this food that makes me go MMMMMMMMMM in a good way
bitch: ok 😭
library dweller: Kids snort pixie dust? Wouldn’t that hurt?
gyaru lover: most likely
luka stan: aaaauuuuuuhhh sim yeon eseo jin huimang 😫😫😫😫
dazai’s crush: please stop singing alien stage
luka stan: no
bitch: what is alien stage
luka stan: a whimsical youtube series that i aspire to live in
dazai’s crush: you can’t sing dazai
luka stan: that’s the point id just die first round
dazai’s crush: ok.
second in command: Are we just going to gloss over the part where Dazai burned down a building? And did drugs?
luka stan: yeah ignore that
second in command: Ok then.
library dweller: Where is Ron?
dazai’s crush: which one is ron again
jokes and tricks #1: we stole his phone
luka stan: fun
jokes and tricks #2: i want to throw it into the great lake
bitch: throw dazai into the great lake
dazai’s crush: please do 🙏🙏
bitch: i like you kid we have similar agendas
dazai’s crush: death to dazai!!!
bitch: death to dazai!!!
luka stan: death to dazai!! 😍😍😍
second in command: Dazai, you can’t say death to yourself.
luka stan: i can and i will blaise... who’s stopping me
second in command: Me?
luka stan: what are you gonna do???? 🤨🤨
second in command: Tackle you?
luka stan: oh! ummmmm please dont
second in command: Sorry. :(
luka stan: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW SNIFFLES IM GONNA CRY
dazai’s crush: blaise dont fall for it!!! do it!
bitch: maybe punch him a couple of times while you’re at it
luka stan: IM BEING GANGED UP ON
luka stan: im sorry don’t hirt me 😢😢😢😢
dazai’s crush: going to beat your ass when we get back to yokohama
luka stan: nooooo 😢😢😢😢
jokes and tricks #1: me and my lovely brother will save you
jokes and tricks #2: yeah!!!
luka stan: um guys
luka stan: HOLY FUCK????
luka stan: SNAPE IS TEXTING ME RIGHT NOW. LIKE DEE M'S. DMS.
gyaru lover: there is no way 😭😭
luka stan: YES WAY.
luka stan: ill be back.
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DMS: #1 nepotist (not really) -> luka stan
#1 nepotist (not really): I'm assuming this is Mr. Dazai?
luka stan: sadly!!!
luka stan: why in the world are you texting me i did NOT expect this
#1 nepotist (not really): I figured it might be easier for you to discuss things behind a screen.
luka stan: why do we have to discuss things........ 😢😢😢
#1 nepotist (not really): Because it is my job as your teacher to keep you safe.
luka stan: im very safe at all times
#1 nepotist (not really): Sure. I've seen you sneaking around the halls late at night. What are you doing up that late?
luka stan: huh
luka stan: im genuinely debating on whether i should lie to you rn
#1 nepotist (not really): Please don't.
luka stan: SIGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
luka stan: ive been meeting someone
luka stan: dont ask who im not telling
#1 nepotist (not really): Is this person a danger to you in any way?
luka stan: no
luka stan: quite the opposite actually
#1 nepotist (not really): I am simply worried about you. If you're going to meet someone, try and do it during the day.
luka stan: thats so lame and not whimsical thoough
#1 nepotist (not really): You are going to be caught by Mr. Filch and Ms. Norris one day, problem child. And you will get in trouble.
luka stan: i live for the chaos snape
#1 nepotist (not really): I'm aware.
#1 nepotist (not really): Please be careful.
luka stan: yeah yeah im very careful at all times!!!!11!1!
#1 nepotist (not really): If this is you being "careful," I'm scared to see what you not being careful brings.
luka stan: is that everything you wanted to talk about...
#1 nepotist (not really): Yes. I will see you later.
luka stan: see ya!!! 🙏🙏🤑🤑
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DMS: luka stan -> dazai's crush
luka stan: snape knows were meeting up during the night chuuu yaaaaaaaa
luka stan: well he doesnt know im meeting YOU he just knows im meeting with someone
dazai's crush: how does he know
luka stan: he said hes seen me sneaking around at night
dazai's crush: hm
luka stan: i need to pay better attention ig i didnt even know 🤷🤷
dazai's crush: bros getting soft LMFAOO anyways its not like youre actively hurting anyone
dazai's crush: we have to watch our mouths though because if he knows youre sneaking around, he might try and follow you
luka stan: yeah
luka stan: UGHHHHHH CURSE HIM AND HIS VERY ABNORMAL WAY OF SHOWING HE CARES ABOUT ME
dazai's crush: thats how normal parents act im pretty sure
luka stan: i guess... i mean my dad wasnt normal so!!
dazai's crush: i dont evem remember my parents bro 😭
luka stan: ehhhhh you have kouyou i have MORI. 💀💀💀💀
dazai's crush: ane-san is more like an older sister tbh shes only 4 years older than me
luka stan: she looks way older than you..... damn... that height difference
dazai's crush: I CANT EVEN HAVE ONE NICE CONVERSATION WITHOUT YOU INSULTING ME DAZAI
dazai's crush: FUCK YOU
luka stan: 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
dazai's crush: and i thought we were making progress.....
luka stan: progress on what 🤨
dazai's crush: if you dont know already then im not telling you
luka stan: WHAAAT
luka stan: CHIBIIII COME BACKKKKKKKKK
luka stan: crying rn
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hell's hounds (and pansy)
luka stan: SO
jokes and tricks #1: what did snape want 😢
luka stan: nothing he caught me sneaking around after hours and asked abt it
bitch: why are you sneaking around at night
luka stan: why not?
bitch: lovely answer, dazai
luka stan: thanks pansy 😘
library dweller: Did you get in trouble?
second in command: If I had to guess, no.
luka stan: yeah definitely not id never get in trouble with snape
luka stan: and if i did id just go jump off a building
freaky rat owner: Oh
library dweller: Don’t do that, Dazai!
luka stan: ron got his phone back!!!
freaky rat owner: Yes
dazai’s crush: this is very random but i’ve got into western music
dazai's crush: like america. like yeehaw. like we use a different system of measurement. like were so patriotic we love red white and blue.
dazai’s crush: and i’m SO confused on why there’s so many like shameless gay country/rap songs
dazai's crush: like detailed too...
luka stan: HES BOUNCIN OFF MY BOOTYCHEEKS I LOVE THE WAY HE RIDESSS
dazai's crush: BRO
bitch: EXCUSE ME 😭😭
gyaru lover: is that an actual song.
luka stan: yes! and it’s sooo funny because it’s catchy and its lowkey stuck in my head??
dazai’s crush: GOOD LORD 💀💀
second in command: That’s interesting.
luka stan: BLAISE LOOK AWAY THIS IS NOT ME 😭😭😭🙏🙏🙏🙏
second in command: ?
bitch: bro is desperate for a man holy shit 💀💀
luka stan: ok im literally not
gyaru lover: WAIT
gyaru lover: WAIT
luka stan: what
gyaru lover: WAIT
jokes and tricks #2: what are you freaking out about?
jokes and tricks #1: helloooo?
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mafia knowers
gyaru lover: UM
gyaru lover: are both of you in the mafia i just now thought back to this
second in command: Who is both of you?
luka stan: im ASSUMING hes talking abt me and my dog
dazai's crush: kys
luka stan: !!!
second in command disliked a message: kys
dazai’s crush: simp?? jeez louise
gyaru lover: yeah i am talking about you
dazai's crush: how do you think we met.
dazai's crush: obviously
luka stan: right
luka stan: id never willingly be friends with him if mori didnt make us work together
dazai's crush: right
dazai's crush: never thought id be friends with the demon student....
luka stan: YOU SHOULD BE HONORED.
dazai's crush: nah...
second in command: When did you join the mafia?
dazai's crush: right after i turned 15
luka stan: yeah all his friends left him too LMFAOOOOOOOOO
dazai's crush: THAT WAS YOUR FAULT YOU CUNT
luka stan: no it wasnt...
dazai's crush: yep sure!!!!
gyaru lover: ok that was all... thanks
luka stan: yuuuur
luka stan: time to go jump out of the windows in the owlery..
gyaru lover: WHAT
gyaru lover: HELLO???
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