Not Your Fate

Lucas,

You weren’t kidding when you said that Hogwarts is full of life. I almost went deaf last night in the Great Hall from how noisy it became. I have no idea how you can bear it everyday, but I suppose I’ll get used to it soon enough.

I made a few friends — well, more like I learned new names yesterday. I got Sorted into Slytherin (go on and cry about it), and I met a sweet girl there. I stuck with her and her friends throughout dinner and she’s now my roommate. Before you even think of asking me in your next letter, no, she’s not my soulmate. I haven’t met them, and I hope I don’t meet them here.

I’m worried about my classes. Will the teachers call me out and make me introduce myself in front of the class every time? God, I hope not. I still feel embarrassed from the Sorting Ceremony and how I was the oldest one there. 

Speaking of my classes, before we left for the train, you said that you had a plan to help me catch up on my education. Although I don’t really have faith in this scheme of yours (you can’t blame me, you aren’t the best planner), it's all the hope I have in passing my studies as of now. The lessons I read through in your old textbooks helped a bit, but I feel like it still won’t be enough, so whatever you have planned, it better be worthwhile and happen sooner rather than later.

I hope the kids are doing okay, and I hope you haven’t been starving or boring them. Tell them I said hi, and that I’ll write to them again soon. I promise.

Hope you’re doing good in the house, Luke. If you need anything, just ask.

See you soon.
Solene

Solene grabbed an envelope from the stack in the cubby in front of her and put her folded letter in it. An owl from the higher perches in the Owlery flew down to her and dutifully stuck its leg out so she could tie the letter around its leg.

“Have a safe flight,” she said softly, and the owl gave a hoot in response before it launched itself into the air and flew out of the open window in the tower and into the young morning light.

Solene let out a deep breath, tucking her cold fingers into her pockets. Her body felt groggy from the lack of sleep; not because she slept late (she really didn’t), but because she woke up really early. She checked the old watch she kept in her bag and saw that it was only four in the morning, and classes started at seven o’clock. She had no idea when curfew hours were, but she decided to lounge in the common room before going out at 5:40 to send her letter.

She was grateful that there were barely any students lurking in the hallways, and the ones that were around seemed to be too tired for conversation with new people. She simply nodded her head towards them when she’d catch their eye and continued her walk to wherever her feet took her.

She found a bench out in the garden near the lake and decided to hang out around there for a few more minutes before heading back inside for breakfast. If it were up to her, she would sit on the grass, but it was still damp from the chilly night and she didn’t want to mess up her uniform.

She leaned back on the bench and sighed, combing her fingers through her slightly wet hair from the shower she had before leaving her dorm. She enjoyed the slight cold in the air around her, the occasional breath of the wind on her neck, and the firm feeling of the metal bench.

Although she had never been in Hogwarts, something about it just felt familiar to her. It was the kind of feeling she only got when she was back home — not at the apartment, but her home before that, with her parents and a future she was looking forward to.

Okay, time to stop thinking there. 

She checked her watch again. It was already six, so it was about time for her to go and eat. She sighed and stood up, shouldering her bag and keeping her head angled toward the ground as she brushed past other students who also decided to spend some minutes out in the early daylight.

The students present in the Great Hall had considerably lessened compared to the capacity last night. People were scattered on their respective long House tables, but this time, some drifted to other tables; she spotted a flash of blue on the Gryffindor table — whose residents stuck to their own table — and yellow was scattered all around.

She couldn’t help but notice that they all seemed to avoid the Syltherin table.

Solene shook off her observation, crossing the room to reach her House table at the side near the wall. She spotted Pandora, with her metallic blonde hair, sitting beside her brother with Regulus sitting across from them. Barty was nowhere to be seen.

This time, it was Evan who waved her over, and she picked up her pace by just a tad and took the spot beside Regulus, making sure to keep some distance between her and the boy. She wasn’t sure if he was fine with physical contact, and she didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable.

“How was your sleep, Solene?” Pandora asked her airily, looking up from her book. “You were gone by the time I woke up this morning.” 

Solene’s eyes darted to the contents of the pages — which were strange illustrations that she didn’t recognize, even when she was sort of familiar with the magical creatures from Lucas’s books — before responding to her. 

“It was alright,” Solene hummed, touching her plate and jumping slightly when sandwiches immediately appeared without her having to ask. She cleared her throat, carefully avoiding Regulus’s slightly amused gaze, as he obviously noticed her reaction. “It seems my body is still used to getting up early.”

As if on cue, Barty stumbled into the space beside her, making her shuffle closer to Regulus to accommodate his sudden presence. “How you people get up early is beyond me,” said Barty, his voice still groggy with sleep.

Evan shook his head fondly, taking a bite of his toast. “How you get up so late is beyond me.”

Barty rolled his eyes, picking up his goblet and chugging down the juice in it. He swallowed before replying, “simple: the beds were comfy as fuck. Felt like I was on a cloud.”

Solene chuckled, picking up her sandwich and starting to eat, taking consistent bites as she kept an eye on the time on her watch. 

She heard the fluttering of wings above her and she looked up, intrigued.

She missed the stiffening of her companions on the table as she observed the owls that entered through unseen windows high up in the Great Hall. It was like a gust of wind; despite not being familiar with one another, they still moved with synchronization, gentle but abundant. 

She tried to spot Apollo from the mass of birds above, but it seems a black owl wasn’t as rare as it seemed. There were a couple among the mass of brown and the occasional speck of white, and Solene gave up her search in favor of asking a question to her companion beside her. 

“Does this happen everyday?” Solene looked at Regulus, her voice trailing towards the end when she saw his expression. It was guarded and anxious.

He must not like receiving mail, Solene thought. Regulus looked down at her, letting out a quiet puff of air in an attempt to lessen the tension from his shoulders before responding. “Yes, every morning. You never know when your family has something they need to send to you.”

Solene hummed, nodding in agreement. 

The loud beating of wings was the only indication that Apollo had approached her. He was a quiet bird, rarely hooting unless he really needed her family’s attention on something, like a stray rat scurrying in the room or papers falling on the floor. His size, however, meant his wings were larger than the average owl’s, and Solene was grateful that Apollo at least made some sound when descending. 

He settled next to her goblet, folding his wings carefully to his side so as to not knock into anything on the table. Dropped in front of her plate was an envelope and a small package. 

Other birds dropped fancy-looking envelopes and neatly-wrapped parcels towards Regulus, Evan, and Barty, and Solene couldn’t help the slight furrow of her brows at the dampening of the light atmosphere. 

Is this a Slytherin thing, not liking mail?

Solene turned to Apollo and gave him a gentle stroke to his head in appreciation. The owl made no sound as he dipped his beak into her goblet for a little drink before launching himself into the air, presumably to rest in the Owlery before making the flight home. 

She let her eyes drift around the table, curiosity spiking at all their equally uncomfortable expressions, before turning to her mail and opening the envelope to be greeted by Lucas’s curvy, messy handwriting.

Dear Solene,

I hope you’ve already sent a letter to us by the time you’re reading this. If you haven’t, then what are you waiting for? I want to hear all about your thoughts on Hogwarts so far.

The kids are doing pretty good. I tried making sinigang last night, but Soph told me not to, since you apparently promised her that you’ll make some when you come home. She’ll hold you to that promise, by the way. She may forget a lot of things quickly, but it seems this one’s going to stick to her memory for a while.

Tommy’s a little rascal. I don’t remember him being this rowdy. I think it’s because he knows I’m not as strict as you. He’s darting everywhere in the apartment nowadays, like he’s in a permanent sugar rush. You got any advice to tame him? I could really use some.

Cal doesn’t say it out loud, but I can tell he misses you. He’s quieter than normal — if that’s even possible. He’s been reading your books lately, the thinner ones. I don’t know if you let him touch your books, but I’m sure you’d cut off my hand before letting me pick up your prized possessions. He seems to be enjoying the stories, though.

All in all, we’re holding up pretty well, so you don’t have to worry about us. I can feel you overthinking all the way from here. You’ll do fine in Hogwarts. Sure, you’re going to have your OWLs in fifth year, and you’re going to attract more attention than usual because you’re a new student, but you’ll get through it. I know you can.

The kids send their love through the package. I don’t know what it is, but I know it involves a lot of glue and paper. The mess they left took forever to clean, and my hands still smell like glue no matter how much I scrub them.

See you soon, Solene. Write as often as you can. The kids want “regular updates.”

Love,
Lucas and the kiddos <3

P.S. A piece of advice I forgot to tell you when you were still here: if anyone tries to pick on you, punch them. The kids there nowadays rely too much on wand combat to know how to properly fight with their fists. You still know jiu jitsu, right? Yeah, that might help you.

Solene chuckled, folding the letter and tucking it gently back into the confines of its envelope. Even through simple written words on a messily ripped piece of paper, her family still managed to lift her spirits and diffuse some of the anxiety she felt on her first day of classes.

She took the package in her hands, debating for a small moment before putting it inside her backpack, deciding to open it later after classes instead, just in case her day turns out to be shit on a platter and she needed some cheering up.

The girl moved to check her watch on her wrist, but the low boom of a distant bell rang rendered her urge to be unnecessary. It sounded like the ones that rang in church, and the students moved at the same time, stuffing the last of their breakfast into their mouths and grabbing their bookbags.

“We better go.” Evan stood up and turned to Solene, giving her a nod. “Good luck in class, Solene.”

The corners of Solene’s lips quirked up slightly. “Thanks, Evan. You too.”

She stood and waved goodbye to Regulus and Barty as they stood to leave with their soulmate. Pandora decided to stick back and wait for Solene to zip her bag closed before rising from the wooden bench and walking out, sticking close together as they muscled through the buildup at the entryway to the Great Hall.

I hope this day goes well.

~•~•~•~

After the two girls got their schedules from their House Head (a pudgy, aging man named Horace Slughorn), they had to separate. Professor Slughorn told Solene to go up to the headmaster’s office, so Pandora went off to Defense Against the Dark Arts while she began her trek to the office.

She approached the stairwell, looking up and sighing at the amount of stairs. They started to shift and attach themselves to different landings, and Solene felt her shoulders slump a little.

Great. This is a different kind of maze here.

She shook her shoulders a bit, silently hyping herself up before taking her step onto the closest staircase. 

“Professor Dumbledore’s office is on the third floor, second hallway to the left. The door is at the very end,” Professor Slughorn said.

Solene clutched the railing when the staircase suddenly stopped swiveling and attached itself to a platform. She hopped off and made sure to keep her balance. If she stumbled, she might find herself falling off.

Okay, we made it to the second floor. One more staircase.

She looked around her, waiting for the next staircase. Once it went to her platform, she immediately stepped onto the staircase, but she yelped when the stair unexpectedly disappeared under her right foot, making it slide through. She grabbed the banister with an iron grip as the staircase started to shift again.

“Shit,” she cursed under her breath, gripping the railing for dear life as she hoisted herself up. She took heavy but consistent breaths from adrenaline as she stood on her own two feet again.

“What kind of school in their right mind would make fake steps?” She mumbled to herself, shaking her head disapprovingly. She climbed up the moving staircase with newfound caution, not wanting her foot to make contact with another false step.

Finally, she made it to the third floor and followed the directions given to her to find the headmaster’s office. In front of it stood a stone gargoyle, which Solene assumed was enchanted. Why else would the headmaster put a gargoyle in front of its entrance?

“Uh,” Solene started off awkwardly, already feeling stupid for talking to a piece of stone. “I’m here to see Professor Dumbledore.”

The gargoyle remained unmoving.

Solene was about to walk away, thinking she might have gotten the directions wrong, until the gargoyle tilted its head, as if listening to something, before springing to the side to let her in.

The girl tilted her head gratefully before stepping through the small archway, climbing up a few steps towards the big wooden double doors. They were already partially open, which made Solene hesitate. Should she knock? Or should she just go in already?

The faint voice from inside the room stopped her inner conflict. “Come in.”

Solene slid herself through the small gap through the door, letting the bag strap on her right shoulder fall so she could fit.

She let herself have a quick glance at the room she found herself in. It was round, its walls decorated with paintings of different men and women and the occasional artifact, including the Sorting Hat, which had its own cushioned perch where it laid silent and motionless.

The girl finally set her sights on the man in front of her. It was the first time she got a good look at the famous headmaster of Hogwarts named Albus Dumbledore. 

Up close, she saw how old he looked. The wrinkles that lined his face like strings were quite abundant, and his wiry gray hair fell down to his back, and his beard was also taking its time growing down his chest.

The only thing that looked young was his eyes. They were very much alive and bright behind those half-moon spectacles. It honestly unnerved Solene a bit.

Bright eyes like those are always up to no good.

“It’s nice to finally meet you, Miss Maxwell,” Dumbledore said pleasantly. He raised a bony hand and gestured to the velvet armchair that rested in front of his work table, and Solene sat down, resting her bag on her lap.

“The feeling’s mutual, Professor,” Solene replied. She was starting to get sick of hearing the polite, passive-aggressive version of her own voice from how much she’s had to use it in the few hours she’s been in the school. “May I ask why you called me to your office?”

The headmaster leaned back on his chair, his elbows resting on its armrests and his fingers intertwining.

Classic old man pose.

“I’m sure you already have a good guess, Miss Maxwell.”

“Please, just Solene is fine, Professor.” Solene shifted a bit in her seat. “Yes, I have a few ideas in mind, but I’d rather hear it from you directly so we can get to the point of the conversation. If you don’t mind, Professor.”

Solene flinched internally at how rude she sounded, but she couldn’t do anything about it now.

Dumbledore’s small smile never left his thin lips. “I’m here to discuss your unique situation.”

Is this the plan Lucas had in mind for me?

“Am I correct in assuming that you have not received formal education before this year, Solene?”

Solene nodded.

“That being the case, your setup in Hogwarts will be different, as I’m sure you predicted. In order to keep up with the lessons in the fifth-year, you will be taking remedial classes during your free periods, as you will not need to take the two added classes that are required for fifth-years to accommodate your situation.”

“Will I have scheduled classes with all the teachers during my free period?” Solene asked.

Dumbledore shook his head. “Not all teachers are able to teach you, but you can have remedial lessons in Transfiguration, Potions, Herbology, Charms, and Defense Against the Dark Arts with the respective teachers. The other subjects will be taught by me.”

Solene leaned back in her chair, digesting it. After a while, she nodded again. 

Dumbledore returned the gesture. He took a piece of paper from the side of his desk and handed it to Solene. When she took it, she realized that it was another schedule, this time, with the free periods filled in with her remedial classes.

“Your remedial classes will start the day after tomorrow. Do you have any questions or concerns?”

Solene looked up from her paper. “Just one.”

She had a feeling that now would be the only time she would ever be able to ask the headmaster. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, why did you let me study in Hogwarts so late after I’ve avoided going here for the past four years?”

Solene expected the headmaster to take a bit of a while before replying, but his response was almost immediate. “I believe everyone deserves a chance to learn and have a normal life, Solene, no matter how ‘behind’ you may think yourself to be when put in comparison with other people your age.”

His eyes softened behind his glasses as he continued. “I have full confidence that you will catch up to your peers in no time, Solene. Maybe even exceed them.”

Solene gave him a polite smile before checking her watch. Despite her making the gesture discreet, Dumbledore still noticed. 

“You can go on to your next class,” he said. He gave her one last smile as she stood up and bowed slightly.

“Thank you, Professor,” she said, nodding her head again as she turned to leave, once again sliding through the narrow gap between the wooden doors. This time, they closed shut behind her without her touching them.

Solene looked over her shoulder, staying still for a few minutes to listen if Dumbledore would say anything else behind the closed doors, but she couldn’t hear anything.

With that, she walked down the few steps and passed by the gargoyle, hoping she could catch Pandora or Regulus and go with them to the next class (if they also had Charms like her).

While she walked, she thought back to what the headmaster said about why he accepted her into Hogwarts. She agreed with him; after all, it was never too late in life to learn new things, or to go to school.

However, despite his kind words, she couldn’t shake off the feeling in her gut that that wasn’t the real reason behind his actions.

~•~•~•~

Time went by quickly that day. She was grateful that she wasn’t going to have any extra lessons that day, because keeping up with the topics that day with her own stock knowledge was difficult enough as it is. At least she had free periods that she could use to recharge her social battery in the gardens.

Throughout the day, she was able to get closer to the others in Pandora’s group, specifically Regulus and Barty. She found herself sitting next to Barty during classes, since Evan and Regulus sat together and Pandora preferred to sit alone when she could so she could have time alone to her thoughts.

They were hanging out in the boys’ dorm after class, since they couldn’t go up to Pandora and Solene’s dorm (not that they wanted to — it seems they also held a dislike for Solene and Pandora’s new roommates). 

Solene sat on the floor with her back leaning on Regulus’s bed as she conversed merrily with Barty. Regulus tried to make her sit on the bed, but she refused. She didn’t really like the idea of sitting on someone else’s bed, especially since she was still in her uniform. Who knows what dirt her clothes managed to collect that she could transfer to the bed?

“What’s your house life like, Solene?” Evan asked from behind Barty. He was reading a book, but he was apparently still listening to their conversation.

Solene shrugged. “It’s pretty normal. I have four brothers and one sister.”

Barty’s eyes widened. “Damn. That’s a lot of siblings.”

“Though it makes sense,” Regulus said thoughtfully. “You seem like an older sibling.”

Solene smiled. “Yeah, I am. I’m the second eldest. Lucas the eldest just graduated Hogwarts last year.”

Evan perked up in recognition. “Lucas Maxwell in Gryffindor, right?”

Solene nodded. “Yeah. You know him?”

“He was the old Gryffindor Quidditch Captain,” Barty replied, his voice holding a bit of venom. Every Slytherin seemed to have that whenever they were forced to mention Gryffindor. 

“Who’s captain now?” Solene asked. 

“James Potter,” Pandora replied softly from her spot in Evan’s bed across from them. She was staring up at the ceiling, having not moved since she first laid down. Judging from the nonchalance of the three boys, it was a normal occurrence.

Speaking of the three boys, they all groaned simultaneously at the name. Their reaction piqued Solene’s never-ending curiosity. “What’s so bad about this James Potter?”

“He’s a fucking Gryffindor,” Barty spat, but fell silent when Regulus looked at him in disapproval.

The younger boy replied with a more civil tone, but wasn’t much different from how Barty spoke. The venom in it was quiet but just as deadly. “Him and his group, the Marauders, pull pranks a lot. They’re mostly harmless, I suppose, but the pranks they do on Slytherin are particularly embarrassing and long-lasting.”

“There was a time when almost every Slytherin’s skin was red for a whole day,” Evan sighed, a hint of his laugh in his voice. “All because they ate the truffle cake for dinner.”

Solene let out a chuckle as Barty squawked out in protest, “You’re just lucky that you had a stomach bug that day and didn’t have the appetite for the truffle cake!”

Evan moved to flick Barty’s forehead, making the latter suddenly tilt his head so his fingers got caught in his teeth, making Evan cry out and curse in French.

“Language, Evan,” Regulus scolded, evidently understanding what Evan was saying. That didn’t stop the blonde’s cursing, though.

After Barty stopped laughing at Evan’s suffering, he turned back to Solene. “How about soulmates, Solene? Have you met them yet?”

At the mention, Solene felt the three marks on her body warm slightly: a star high on her sternum, a moon below her ribcage on her right side, and antlers on the outer part of her left thigh. 

She rarely thought about those marks because she refused to think about them whenever she saw them in the mirror. Those marks that normally felt like safety to others, were like brands on Solene’s skin — reminders of her weakness as a human.

Solene fought to keep her voice even. “No, not yet.”

If the girl looked uncomfortable, none of them noticed. “What d’you think they’re like?” Barty said, laying down on his four-poster bed with his head close to one of the thin wooden pillars at the foot of the bed.

“I dunno. I don’t really give them much thought, honestly,” Solene mumbled, her fingers giving into the urge to play with her rings, twisting them subconsciously.

Solene was being honest. Whenever she thought about her soulmates, she immediately stopped them from progressing any further. The few times she decided not to do that ended with her almost passing out from a lack of oxygen or feeling the disgusting trail of tears run down her cheeks without pauses.

So yeah, she tried not to give them that much thought.

She wasn’t sure if Regulus sensed her discomfort or if it was a subconscious decision, but he spoke, standing up. “We should head up to dinner soon. It’s better to head there early than get caught up in the traffic.”

Pandora was the first one to move, sitting up from her brother’s bed and fixing her uniform. “I agree.”

Barty and Evan didn’t say anything against it, opting to just stand up and stretch, so Solene followed, taking a moment to slip her shoes on before moving to stand up. When she looked up, she saw Barty hold out a hand for her to grab.

After a moment of just silent eye contact between the two, Solene reached out and grabbed his wrist, while he did the same to hers and hauled her to her feet.

She dragged her hands down her skirt a few times to smoothen out the new creases on it. “Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it,” Barty replied, pocketing his hands and strolling out the room, stopping just at the doorway to look back at her. They were the only ones left inside, the rest of their group having gone out to wait in the common room.

“You coming?” Barty tilted her head to beckon her forward. 

Solene smiled slightly, nodding. “Yeah. Let’s go.”

They both walked out of the dorm together, basked in a comfortable silence for a few moments before the boy broke it.

“I’m… sorry, by the way.”

Solene perked up, confused. “For?”

Barty didn’t look at her, staring ahead as they walked down the stairs. “For mentioning soulmates. I noticed it made you a bit uncomfortable, and I’m sorry for that.”

Solene stiffened a bit, looking away. How embarrassing, he caught wind of what I felt. I have to be more discreet.

Barty continued. “Don’t worry about seeming out-of-place when it comes to soulmates. If you’re looking for people who have problems with that kind of stuff, Slytherin is full of that.”

Solene turned to him, furrowing her eyebrows slightly in question, and this time, Barty looked back at her, his eyes uncharacteristically soft with pity. 

“Arranged marriages are just as common now as they were before,” Barty supplied, and said nothing more as they arrived in the common room and rejoined with the rest of their group. It wasn’t like he needed to say anything else, anyway. Solene already understood.

Barty was a bit closed-off after their conversation, but his iciness quickly faded as he bickered with Evan, occasionally shoving him and barking out harsh laughs as Evan constantly switched from French to English just to annoy the other boy.

Solene contributed nothing to their talks, and she was perfectly fine with that. Being able to witness — and take part in — friendships like these was enough for her.

In fact, it was more than enough.