Chapter 7
They walk down the steps, looking out for any teachers, Sirius unable to stop giggling. They tell the person at the front desk they lost their key and need a new one, and then they race back upstairs, stumbling around and finally calming down in front of McGonagall’s door. Sirius shares one last look with James before he slides the key into the slot, instantly unlocking it.
James steps in first, suppressing a giggle, and Sirius follows with his phone, the flashlight on.
McGonagall, it turns out, sleeps on her back, with a mask over her eyes. Sirius snaps a quick picture before they sneak over to her desk, carefully opening the folder with all the student info.
Sirius’ eyes fly over the name, until it lands on Remus’ and he quickly takes a picture, before they close the folder.
Just then, McGonagall shifts, letting out a cat-like noise, and Sirius jumps so hard he hits James in the chin, who’d been looking at the folder over his head.
James groans, slapping a hand over his mouth, eyes widening, and then they’re running, pulling the door open so hard it nearly slams against the wall, before practically zooming back to James’ room.
They stand behind the door, backs pressed against it, panting, and listen as thunderous footsteps make their way down the hall.
They scramble towards the beds, jumping in, and wake Regulus up, who lifts his head with a muffled “Wragh?”.
James shushes him gently, and Regulus just plops his head back down into the pillow, not in the mood for their shite.
James and Sirius quickly get under the covers, just as McGonagall starts knocking furiously on their door.
James and Sirius share a grin before James, the picture of innocence, stands up and ‘sleepily’ opens the door. “Professor?”
“What on earth were you thinking?”
“Pardon?”
“Don’t you play dumb with me, Potter”
“Professor, I promise, I don’t know what you mean.”
Sirius walks over to them, too, faking confusion. “What happened?”
McGonagall stares between the two of them, her eye twitching, before she sighs and turns around, muttering something suspiciously close to “be the death of me,” under her breath.
As soon as the door closes, James and Sirius burst out laughing.
“Fuck, that was brilliant”
“I love us”
“We’re the best”
“The very best”
“Jamie, stop being loud”
Regulus has lifted his head again, eyes squeezed shut tightly, a frown on his face.
“Sorry, baby” James walks over to him, pecking on the nose and climbing into the bed with him, pulling him onto his chest.
Sirius rolls his eyes, though in a more fond than annoyed way. “Right, I’m gonna go… stare at his contact for an hour, probably”
“Have fun,” James distractedly calls, too busy peppering Regulus’ face with kisses.
For some reason, Sirius finds himself disappointed when he enters his room again. It’s just not nearly as fun if Remus isn’t around to be a pain in the arse, with his stupid soft jumpers and fluffy hair and freckles and-
He shakes the thought from his head, plopping himself down on his bed.
Remus’ phone number is actually quite satisfying, he thinks. +49 505 666 1189
It’s got the number of the devil right there. Perfect fit.
As he scans the rest of the information on Remus, he finds himself frowning when the emergency number is the same as Remus’ phone number. Sirius’ emergency is Effie, just like Regulus and James. Why on earth wouldn’t Remus put his parent’s number there? Seems a bit stupid. If something happens to him, are they just supposed to contact him, or what?
Sirius decides he’ll leave that for another time, and dials the number into his phone.
It rings. And rings. And rings.
Sirius groans loudly, and tries another four times before he decides to text him instead.
‘Hey, it’s Sirius. Are you alive?’
He sent the message at just past one thirty, and it still hasn’t been read at three. Sirius is pretty sure his eye started twitching, and he decides he can’t take it anymore, crawling into Remus’ bed and breathing in his smell. He finds two jumpers tangled up in the covers, and just pulls them on. God, he hates this. I feel so fucking alone.
Even though he feels a bit better now that he’s lying down and warm, he still can’t sleep.
What if Remus is just dead? What if he was going to come back before dinner, but then got mugged or something? What if he’s bleeding out in a ditch while Sirius is in his fucking bed?
What if he’s been drugged and someone is raping him or something? Or they’ve kidnapped him and he’s being tortured?
Sirius’ mindset barely changes for the next two hours, but eventually he does get up again and starts pacing.
He decides to go for a walk, just around the hotel before he starts ripping out his own hair.
First he walks all the way up the stairs, down the hall and back, repeating that on every floor. Then, he goes down and checks out the sauna and the changing rooms and stuff, then he looks at the library, which he finds is a slightly odd thing for a hotel to have, and then he decides he’ll just go outside for a while, he might as well.
He makes his way back to the entry hall, past reception and walks to the front door. Just as he reaches out for the handle, it turns on its own and the door is pushed open.
Remus’ eyes widen when they see him, but he barely has a second to process before Sirius throws himself at him, hugging him as tight as his stupid little arms can.
“Woah-”
“What the hell is wrong with you!?”
“What?”
“Do you have any fucking clue how worried- don’t you dare do that ever again, you selfish little cunt. I hate you, you know that? I fucking hate you,” Sirius promptly starts crying into Remus’ shoulder.
“I… okay, yeah, you hate me, it’s okay”
Sirius just cries harder when Remus starts brushing his fingers through his hair.
“Sirius, please don’t cry. I’ve got you, I promise. It’s okay.”
“You didn’t answer my texts”
“You- I’m sorry, I was… busy.”
“Doing what!?”
“Um… stuff”
“You’re fucking mental, Remus, god. Please don’t do that again. I had to break into McGonagall’s room just to get your number.”
At that, Remus laughs, “You did?”
“Yeah”
“Idiot”
“No more than you”
He can feel Remus smile into his hair as he shakes his head. “No, we’re both equally stupid. I- I’m sorry I took so long, I just-”
“What?”
“You know, I was just…”
“...busy?”
“yeah”
“Okay”
“M’sorry”
“S’okay. Just don’t do it again.” Has he mentioned he loves Remus’ smell?
He breathes him in, nose buried deep in his teddy bear jacket, and can’t help but smile.
“D’you wanna go upstairs? I’m kinda cold”
“Oh, okay, yeah”
Sirius is reluctant to let go and Remus can clearly tell, so he holds his hand out for Sirius, who takes it without a word.
“Have you slept at all?” He asks and Sirius snorts.
“Have you?”
“A little. Well, sort of.”
“What does that mean?”
“...nothing”
“No, tell me.”
“I- I didn’t really sleep just- well, I might’ve just kinda passed out a little”
Sirius stops right in his tracks. “What? Where? From what?”
“It’s fine, really. Don’t make a big deal out of it.”
“It is a big deal though. Were you drinking? Did you take-”
“No, I was just… a little dizzy, I guess. It’s fine.”
“No, it’s not- did you hit your head? Or-” Sirius reaches up and forcefully grabs Remus’ face, turning it from side to side.
“Sirius, I’m fine. I promise.”
How are his eyes so warm?
Sirius sighs. “You better be”
Remus’ lips twitch a little and he lets out a breathy chuckle, before pulling Sirius up the rest of the stairs.
Sirius still doesn’t quite feel like he can let go yet, despite that feeling that he should. That feeling he’s had the whole time, screaming, no.
He finds, now, it sounds an awful lot like his mother.
He likes Remus, okay? Yes, he’s a pain, yes, he gets on Sirius’ nerves a little, but he’s funny, too. He’s nice. He cares. He’s… surprising, in a way that leaves Sirius a little breathless.
And he doesn’t want to let it go. Why should he?
Remus’ skin is all cold, and his clothes are giving it off in that odd way they do, when someone comes in from the cold and the air around them just is cold, too. Sirius has this urge to warm it up.
He waits, lying on his back, while Remus pees. It’s nearly six o’clock now, and Sirius is very ready to finally sleep.
For the first time on the trip, he doesn’t sleep at the furthest edge of his bed, back facing Remus. He just kinda… scooches closer than normal, close enough to lay his head on Remus’ pillow.
If Remus thinks it’s weird when he comes back from the loo, he doesn’t say, and just lies down, also closer than necessary. The only thing separating them now is the line where the two mattresses meet.
“Remus?”
“Hmm?”
“Where’d you go?”
“...just, here and there”
“Were you… with people? Your friends from here?”
“No”
“So you were alone all night?”
“Well, if you put it like that it sounds kinda lame”
“It is kinda lame”
“Ha, yeah” He chuckles, but his smile fades.
“Maybe-” Remus’ eyes meet his and Sirius takes a slightly startled breath at all the emotion in them. “I- maybe I could… come? Next time?”
Sirius crosses the line.
“It’s… not very fun”
“I don’t mind”
Remus lets him onto his side of it.
“Yeah. Okay. If you want”
Sirius smiles, “okay”. He tentatively lays his head on Remus’ chest, and it rises and falls with every one of his breaths. It takes a second, but Remus puts his arm around him and pulls him a little closer, resting his chin over Sirius’ head.
“You know, you can be kinda lovely when you’re not being a dick,” Remus whispers.
“You’re one to talk”
They both laugh, and when Remus’ chuckles turn into sobs, Sirius just pulls him closer and doesn’t say a word.