Chapter 40 Draco
Chapter 40 Draco
‘Draco? Are you alright?’ Dudley ran over and kneeled next to him.
‘I’m fine. I should have known it wouldn’t be that easy.’ Draco wheezed the words, clearly winded.
Draco was dazed but fine, and Dudley helped him back onto his feet. As they stood they both noticed something new had appeared on the doorstep, they approached cautiously. It was a bowl, white and carved with an undulating curved pattern around the edge.
‘Is that a bowl?’ Dudley asked.
Draco knew immediately what it was for. Of course… Voldemort would want to weaken anyone who might seek the horcrux. This bowl was for blood.
‘It’s for blood.’ Draco said.
He felt a shimmer in the air, he had felt the horcrux getting closer as he had walked towards Riddle Manor, but now it was very close it was like the air was buzzing, the horcrux was waiting in anticipation, like it knew they were close and it was excited. Perhaps it was because a part of Draco was inside the horcrux too. He felt connected to it, he couldn’t explain the feeling but it was like he could read its mind.
‘What?’ Dudely asked. ‘How do you know?’
‘I just do. It’s like I can feel it talking to me, in my head, like I know whatever it knows.’
‘You talk about it like it’s alive.’ Dudley said, his brows knitting together in that was that they did when he was worried.
‘I think it is alive, it feels alive. Can you feel it in the air?’
‘No.’ Dudley shook his head looking very concerned now.
‘We have to fill the bowl.’ Draco said pulling out his left arm, if he was going to bleed himself he wasn’t going to lose the use of both his upper limbs.
‘What? No!’ Dudley looked horrified as Draco took his knife from his robes and held it to his wrist.
‘We have to Dudley.’
‘Well why can’t I do it?’
‘You’ve done enough already.’
‘And you haven’t? You’ve lost a hand Draco. But also, we need your magic, if you’re incapacitated then we really have no hope, what if you need magic to get to it? I won’t be able to help.’
Draco hesitated, that was true. But he wouldn’t risk Dudley.
‘What about an animal?’ Dudley asked
‘What?’
‘We could find a fox or a badger or something and kill it.’
It wasn’t a bad idea, Draco was sure it wouldn’t work, but it was worth a try.
‘We could try.’ Draco agreed.
‘You go that way’ Dudley pointed to the dense woodland to the right of the house.
‘I’ll go this way’ he pointed to the empty meadow to the left. ‘There might be a badger set down there or something.’
‘Shouldn’t we stay together?’ Draco asked.
‘Ideally, but we need to be quick, we’ll cover more ground this way.’
‘Okay.’ Draco agreed, he couldn’t really argue ‘take this.’ Draco handed him the knife.
Dudley took it, weighing it in his hands,
he smiled and Draco kissed his lips gently.
They parted, Dudley walking down across the overgrown lawn to the meadow. Draco setting off into the forest. The woodland was dark and damp, it was filled with old gnarled oaks and fallen rotting tree trunks. Draco climbed over them wand, aloft in-front of him, he had been walking ten minutes when he saw a hare bound across the path ahead of him.
‘Accio hare’ the hare struggled as its body was lifted from the ground and it flew kicking and squealing Towards Draco.
‘Immobulus’ the hare went suddenly completely still, but the glistening fear in its wide black eyes pierced Draco’s heart.
‘I’m really sorry.’ Draco whispered, stroking down its smooth back, its fur was like silk, soft and clean. ‘Forgive me’ Draco whispered to the frightened creature.
‘Avada kedavra’ Draco breathed the words as quietly and gently as he could, like they were a lullaby and not an unforgivable curse.
The hare went still, glassy eyes unseeing and wet. Draco felt a wave of guilt, the poor thing, plucked from its simple life and murdered, the hare didn’t understand why. He didn’t know that Draco hadn’t wanted to do this, for all he knew Draco was as evil as Voldemort killing needlessly and violently purely for the fun of it.
Draco picked up the hare’s lifeless body as reverently as he could and began his walk back to the manor.
As Draco left the darkness of the woods he saw Dudley’s silhouette sat at the doorstep of the manor. He had hoped he would make it back first so he could bleed the hare without Dudley seeing. He didn’t want Dudley to associate him with death, though it seemed whatever he tried he always ended up hurting things.
As Draco walked closer to the manor he could see that something wasn’t right, Dudley was hunched at an awkward angle. All at once the realisation hit Draco like a freight train. He dropped the hare and broke into a run. He was a fool, how had he not seen this coming? As he got close bright red assaulted his eyes. Dudley was leaning against the door, wrist sliced open with a deep straight line. Dudley’s wrist was inside the white bowl, and blood gushed from him. It was everywhere, soaking into Dudley’s shirt, smeared on the door itself, there was pools of it all over the doorstep. The bowl itself was almost full, there must have been pints inside it. Dudley looked pale and listless. His eyes were open but not fully.
‘No. No. Dudley no. What have you done? You’re so stupid. What were you thinking?’
Draco pulled his wrist from the bowl and lifted it above Dudley’s head.
Dudley’s head lolled to the side to look at Draco, he had a smug smile on his lips.
‘Sorry.’ He said shrugging.
‘Vulnera Sanentur’ draco pointed his wand at Dudley’s wrist and the deep gash knitted together neatly. He could stop the bleeding but he could not replace what Dudley had already lost.
‘Dudley, why? We were going to use an animal. What have you done?’
‘Sorry’ Dudley whispered again, looking so white that he might pass out at any given moment. ‘It wouldn’t work, I think we both knew that it wouldn’t work, didn’t we?’ Draco couldn’t argue with him.
‘I knew you wouldn’t let me, but we need your magic, you couldn’t have done it. So I made the choice for both of us. I don’t regret it.’
‘Dudley you sweet sweet idiot.’
‘You need to be strong for whatever is in there. I don’t have magic. I don’t know if I’ll be able to help you. But this is something I could do.’
‘I can’t leave you here!’
‘You have to.’
‘No.’ Draco was crying now, wetness dripping from his eyes and onto Dudley lap where he was leaned over him.
‘Draco?’ Dudley looked at him so deeply, like he was seeing him for the first time.
‘You can do this.’ Dudley said the words so earnestly that Draco actually believed them.
‘I can’t help you. But I’ll be here. I’m not dead okay?’
‘What if you die while I’m gone?’ Draco sniffed.
‘What if you die while I’m gone?’
Dudley countered.
Draco said nothing.
‘Go.’ Dudley whispered. ‘You can do this. Go.’
Draco leaned in, he held Dudley close, raking his fingers through his thick hair, trying to take in every part of him. He tried to ignore the metallic smell of blood that hung in the air and instead took a long inhale, he was sweaty but he still smelled of Dudley.
He kissed Dudley’s forehead and stood.
Dudley shuffled sideways away from the door to allow Draco entry.
‘I’ll be right back okay? Don’t die.’
‘I’ll try not to.’
Draco placed a hand to the handle. There was a brass serpent wound around it. This time he was not flung backwards but instead the handle gave way with a click allowing him inside. Draco looked down at Dudley’s pale face and Dudley nodded. He could do this. He had to make Dudley’s sacrifice worthwhile. Draco stepped inside the house.
Suddenly Draco was hit with a wave of anticipation. The horcrux knew he was here, he could feel it. It was as though the air was filled with static electricity. The house was just as he remembered it. He looked to the place the cauldron had stood and remembered what had happened, the shock and the pain and all of the horrors that followed. Draco tried to shake it from his thoughts and instead he started towards the staircase, he didn’t know why, he just knew that it was upstairs like he knew that the sky was blue, it was a fact.
Draco walked slowly, wand aloft. The stairs had once been ornate but were rusted now and creaked loudly under his feet. Draco arrived at the upstairs landing, there was two corridors, one leading left and one leading right, both were lined with large doors. Some were open, some shut, one was fallen from its hinges and laid on the floor. Draco knew where to go, he could feel it, he turned left. The corridor was was wide and arched. At the end there was a door that looked much the same as all of the others, dark wood and mouldy in places.
Draco approached, knowing the horcrux was behind this door. He opened it slowly wand held out in front of him. As soon as the door was open a gust of rancid, stale wind hit him. It felt like he’d opened the door to a crypt, a sense of darkness shrouded him, death hung in the air. Draco was overcome with a grave hopelessness, what was the point of trying? It was all going to fail in the end anyway.
Through his Despair he heard an anguished cry, it didn’t appear to have come from any direction, it reverberated through him like he had screamed, but Draco was fairly sure it wasn’t him. He almost fled the landing to run and check on Dudley but what would be the point? Dudley was probably going to die anyway, maybe he was already dead. Before he could form another dark thought a hooded black figure swept up towards him, seemingly from nowhere a large dementor was loomed over him. Draco had seen them before but never this close, they had never felt this big or this dark. He could just make out the gaping mouth beneath its black hood. It glinted with wet saliva, a dark hole waiting to drag his soul inside it. The skin around its mouth was dark and thick, flakes of skin peeling in places and angry open sores along the edges of its thin lips. It truly was a thing of nightmares, the monster of childhood dreams. Draco couldn’t help it, a cry escaped him. He wasn’t sure what he had been expecting, but it wasn’t this. The creature swept down on him, a rattling breath heaving from its gaping mouth as it tore a part of Draco away. Draco closed his eyes and heard another anguished cry, the same one as before, then he saw his hand falling into a cauldron. The cry was his own, the sound he had let out as his hand had been struck from his body. Draco felt something hard hit his back and when he opened his eyes he found that he was now laid on his back on the hallway floor. The dementor was hovering over him like black smoke, it was breathing heavily. Draco managed to bring his wand up and point it at the dementor, he may as well try.
‘Expecto patronum’ a weak white wisp left the tip of his wand, it floated for a second and then Dissolved into nothing. The dementor didn’t even seem to notice. Draco had never been able to conjure a patronus, never been able to form more than a thin white wisp, it had been a point of much embarrassment at Hogwarts. He wondered why had he even tried, it was humiliating. The dementor was joined by two others both of whom seemed to appear out of thin air, all three of them took long rasping breaths, pulling something from him, leaving cold emptiness in its wake. Draco saw himself as a child, his father crouched over him shouting, beating him, slapping his face, his rage untethered, spit flew from his fathers mouth and landed on Dracos face he remembered that moment well, he was seven and had attempted to befriend a muggle born child. He barely understood blood purity and had been confused by the pure fury his father unleashed when they returned home.
‘You will never disrespect your family name again.’ his father hurled the words at him like bullets. Draco was released from the memory and brought back to Riddle Manor. The three dementors were on top of him, taking turns pulling the dark memories from him, feeding on his despair dragging his soul from his chest. He would be gone soon.
The pain would stop soon. He had failed, failed Harry, failed Dudley, failed everyone. Voldemort would win and it was entirely his fault. He had dragged Dudley down with him. He must have been cursed from the begining. Draco wanted death now, he longed for it, he anticipated the dementors next breath, willing it to come sooner, to end this pain. He lay there willingly, allowing the three shrouded figures to greedily feast on his agony.
He saw Dudley this time, broken and in a heap on the floor, he had just used the cruciatus curse on him. Draco watched Dudley’s body writhe and contort with pain. Dudley tried to stand but his limbs were spasming violently. It was the worst of all the memories he had been forced to relive, it made the loss of his hand pale in comparison, a flea bite. Watching Dudley struggle across the tiled floor knowing that he had caused him unimaginable pain was like being torn in half, it sliced through his body like a hot knife. The weight of the guilt was unbearably heavy. He wished for death now, he tried to shut the memory away, he tried not to look at it but it was impossible, the dementor forced the memories to the forefront, like they were holding his eyes open to it, there was nowhere he could hide.
Draco didn’t care anymore, the world could burn he just needed this to end. He begged the universe that the next breath killed him. Instead the rasping breath was interrupted by a shout.
‘DRACO NO!’ At first Draco thought it was a new memory, but it wasn’t, it was Dudley. Draco forced his eyes open and turned his head to see Dudley dragging his weakened body across the landing towards him, he must have been too weak to stand. Had he dragged himself here through the grime and the dust and the pain?
A small light filled his chest as he took in Dudley’s broken body as he heaved himself along the corridor towards him. Draco ignored the dementors above him instead choosing to look at the determination on Dudley’s anguished face. He wanted the last thing he saw to be Dudley. Dudley continued to make his way towards Draco despite the knowledge that there was nothing he could do to help, only magic could repel these creatures and Dudley didn’t have it. He was so good. Draco didn't have even a fraction of Dudley’s goodness or bravery. But for some reason Dudley loved him. He loved Dudley. They would at least be together at the end. One of the dementors looked up, noticing another meal was making itself available. The fear of Dudley having to relive his most painful moments spurred Draco to act, he decided to try one last time, if he had any chance, he had to try to save Dudley. He thought hard, searching for a happy memory. He rifled through his thoughts, he remembered the flip in his stomach as Dudley had pulled his mouth down towards his, and their lips had touched for the first time. It was strong, the memory filled him up, he breathed it in remembering the mole on Dudley’s right cheek, the feel of Dudley’s strong hands on his head, the way their lips had just barely even touched but Draco had known his whole life had changed in that moment. When the memory was inside him fully, filling every crack, every part of him with an agonising longing and a glowing warmth he said the words, barely even lifting his wand.
‘Expecto patronum’ it took Draco by complete surprise, something huge leaped from the end of his wand, four legs and made of pure white-blue light, wisps of it trailed behind it. The beast was large, it took up so much space, bigger than Dudley by almost double, Draco couldn’t quite make out what it was, his vision blurring. He watched as the heaving mass of light forced one dementor straight out of an open window. The exhaustion hit him, Draco couldn’t see anymore, all he could do was let the darkness take him and hope that the patronus would protect Dudley for long enough that he could get out. Draco turned in Dudley’s direction and wished he could have seen him one last time ‘I lo…’ Draco began before everything went black.