Chapter 13 Draco
Chapter 13 Draco
Watching Dudley sleep had become Draco’s new hobby, he was still terribly weak, even with Draco’s spell work. When sana salutem wore off it was obvious that Dudley was in pain, he would lay still in his corner or cover his head in the duvet claiming the light was intolerable despite the gloom of the dungeon. Draco worried about him every moment he was away, what if the spell stopped working? How long would it take for him to be okay again? Would he ever be okay again? Draco had to maintain appearances so he tore himself from Dudley for a few hours a day.
Dudley was struggling to stand, he was wobbly on his feet and he wasn’t eating very much either. Draco hummed with unease, it was his fault, he wasn’t doing enough to make Dudley better. Three days had passed since Dudley and Draco apparated back into the dungeon. Draco was spending most of his day and all of his nights in the dungeon, Dudley was his new ‘project’ so luckily it wasn’t rousing suspicion. The both of them were sleeping on the floor, Draco by the far wall and Dudley in his corner. They seemed to coexist nicely beside one another. When Dudley was up to it they would make small talk but otherwise they were happy in an amiable silence. Dudley was till wary of Draco, it was clear in the way he looked at him sometimes. Dudley still didn’t alllw Draco close to him, but that was okay. Draco could deal with that, it was incredible that Dudley could even look him in the eye after what he had done. Dudley would let Draco read to him before they slept, they had made it about halfway through The Lion the Witch and the Wardrobe.
‘It would be nice wouldn’t it’ Dudley said as Draco put the book down for the night.
‘What?’
‘To just be able to disappear and start fresh somewhere else, like the Pevensie’s I mean. I think it would be brilliant to try again, my life is so fucked up’ Dudley laughed.
‘Yeah.’ Was all Draco could reply. He would like to start again too. He got lost in the fantasy. What would he do? Maybe he’d just live in the muggle world and leave magic behind altogether. His life was far too complicated. Simple is what he would choose if he could give life another try. A little cottage in the country, a muggle job, a cat maybe, he’d take Vinny with him, he would read and cook and garden.
‘Draco?’
‘Hmmm? Sorry’
‘You disappeared for a minute there’
‘Yeah. Sorry.’
‘Are you alright?’ Dudley looked concerned.
Draco laughed.
‘I’m fine, just, I think I would start again too. You know, if Narnia was an option’
‘It would be good wouldn’t it?’ Dudley smiled.
‘Maybe we could go together.’
The words left Draco’s mouth before he had a chance to think about them. He felt himself turning red, blood rushing to his cheeks.
‘Together?’ Dudley asked
‘I don’t know why I said that, I didn’t mean it’
‘Okay’ was Dudley’s response.
A very heavy silence filled the air between them, Draco had ruined things. They were almost becoming sort of friends, but it was fragile and Draco had just smashed it. Dudley probably thought Draco was going to try and assault him in his sleep now.
Draco had never really had proper friends, Crabbe and Goyle were the closest he had to friends but they were more like followers really and Draco didn’t actually like either of them to be honest. Draco hadn’t thought of them once over the summer, he didn’t miss them. Hogwarts is what he missed.
‘I wouldn’t mind that’ Dudley said simply, making no eye contact.
‘What?’
‘Going to Narnia together, it would be nice not to be alone.’
‘Oh…’ Draco hadn’t expected that.
‘It sounds like we’d both like a clean slate, there’s nothing here for me, now my parents are gone’
Neither of them said anything for a while.
‘What were they like?’ Draco asked slowly
‘My parents?
‘Yeah’
‘Well… my dad is…was a manager at a company that makes drills.’
‘What’s a drill?’
‘You use them to make holes in things.’
‘Being a muggle sounds inconvenient’ Draco said it with a smirk attempting to lift the mood.
‘Sorry, go on…’ Draco said
‘He was grumpy, but he loved me. He played golf every Sunday. His favourite meal was toad in the hole. He was unkind to Harry but, I think that was more out of fear than hatred, not that that’s an excuse.’
‘And your mum?’
‘Mum is… was completely neurotic’ Dudley couldn’t help but let a fond smile dance across his face.
‘She would bleach the toilet twice a day, change the bedding every night, she descaled the kettle once a week, she was mad. She hated magic. It was the reason she lost her sister and she resented Harry for it. But she loved me, and she loved my dad. She would spoil us both rotten, she’s the reason I’m, you know ‘big boned’
The ghost of a smile lingered on Dudley’s face after he stopped talking.
‘What about you, what was it like growing up here?’ Dudley gestured upwards to the mansion they were currently underneath.
Draco picked at his thumb.
‘Yeah. It’s all I’ve ever known really so. Just kind of normal’ Dudley didn’t ask what Draco’s parents were like, he had met them after all. Draco wanted to scream ‘I HATE IT HERE AND I WISH EVERY DAY THAT I WAS BACK AT HOGWARTS’
What he actually said was
‘It’s been harder, having him here. Everything has just gone up a gear, it’s all too fast and I don’t… ‘
He trailed off
‘Don’t what?’ Dudley asked
‘I don’t think I want the same things that my family want’ this was dangerous territory, Draco was saying too much but he carried on regardless.
‘I don’t think I believe the same things as them, but I don’t know how to not be me. Blood status, tradition and politics. That stuff comes with being a Malfoy. There’s no choice.’
‘Blood status?’
‘You know like pureblood, half blood, mud blood, squib, muggle.’
‘None of those words mean anything.’
‘Didn’t you grow up with Harry Potter, he never explained any of this to you?’
‘We weren’t close.’
‘It’s a hierarchy, pureblood, children of magic parents, half blood, one magical parent. Mudblood, muggle parents, squib, magical parents with non magic children and muggles, no magic’
‘A hierarchy? You believe some people are less important than you because of your blood?’
Draco stopped, the conversation had derailed. Dudley was staring daggers at him, waiting for his answer’
‘Maybe? No? I don’t know? It’s what I’ve grown up with, my whole life I’ve been told the importance of blood status, it’s hard to unlearn but no I don’t think so. I see that half bloods have their merits’
‘Not muggles, mudbloods or squibs though’
Dudley was angry now.
‘You’re all the fucking same you wizards, you think you’re so much better than us just because you know a few cheap tricks. Fuck you.’
‘Wait Dudley…’
‘Good fucking night’ Dudley spat and he slowly and painfully turned himself over to face the wall.
Draco sat for a minute before the tears started to run, the glow that had been slowly getting brighter inside him had suddenly been snuffed out, Draco was cold again. He didn’t want Dudley to hear him cry, so he disappeared to his bedroom and wept on his bed until he slept.