Child of the Stars

The kitten as it turns out did not actually belong to anyone. One of the local cats had kittens and they actually had been attempting to find new homes. This one was the last and had a habit of being found in unusual places, normally not where his caretakers left him. “Little bundle of chaos are you, that sounds familiar.” Gilriant had scooped the kitten up out of the basket and the little ginger kitten had immediately started purring.

A small sigh escaped him as he adjusted the kitten so he could check the little one over. Completely healthy, not even any signs as so much of a single flea. When the kitten grabbed at his hand and then tried to groom it, Gilriant had a hopeless feeling that he was being claimed. The issue he could see with that is typical cats did not live very long. Especially when compared to an elf. The young elf knew the longer he lived the faster time would seem to pass.

Hadir leaned into his space and reached to gently rub between the kitten’s ears. “It will hurt,” the older elf warned softly. His voice held no judgement, or rejection of the little one. Just a cautionary warning. “I know.” Gilriant studied the little one. “Our host may not appreciate you bringing home a pet.” Again, no judgement from the marchwarden. “He might if someone else likes him.”

Silently he invited his much beloved friend to join in. In a burst of snowflakes Hedwig arrived in the air above him, much to the delighted gasps of the edain. She landed on his shoulder with a questioning trill. “Looks like I found a new friend, what do you think?” He could feel Haldir’s amusement and approval as he carefully held up the kitten for the ice phoenix to inspect. She stretched out her neck to touch her beak to the nose of the kitten. The little ginger gave a squeaky mew in return. After a moment Hedwig gave a little preen of his fur and the kitten started purring again. “Guess that’s that then.” Gonben’s voice was amused as Ferdil picked up the basket.

“Well he’ll need a name,” Erecthel commented. With a thoughtful hum, Gilriant considered how the bright ginger fur stirred a memory, people he had not thought of in a long time. “Looks like a Weasley to me. What do you think, Hedwig?” His oldest friend stared at him and then trilled. “Yes I know, Weasley can mean mischief but that was going to happen anyways, he’s a cat.” The ice phoenix gave an amused trill.

“Well I do believe that’s enough for today. Time to head back. Did you want to go ahead or keep me company?” After a brief consideration Hedwig settled more firmly into her perch on his shoulder. “Ride with me it is.” As they headed back towards the horses, the crowd easily parted to let them pass. Though they were followed by murmurs of conversation. The edain didn’t seem to know which was more astonishing, one of the elves picking up a stray cat or having a rather fantastical white bird appear out of thin air. Amathleg did slip away at one point and when he came back, added a small pot of catnip to the basket.

It was not unknown for an elf to have a pet. Typically they gravitated towards longer-lived animals or birds. The older the elf, the lower the chance they would consider having a pet. With how grief could literally kill in the case of elves, it was understandable they actively avoided that situation. With caring hearts made to nurture the world around them, it still happened. So when one elf did have a pet, others could and would take the opportunity to enjoy the experience while it lasted.

When they reached Roitaro and the horses, Giriant paused to introduce the kitten to his steed. While elven horses tended to be calm, the young elf still thought it might be a good idea for introduction just in case the kitten decided to initiate in antics. Weasley appeared to be one brave kitten, for seeing the horse’s nose descending to him for a sniff, he just bumped his nose back against it.

It didn’t take them long to get moving and headed back out of the settlement. While they remained the center of attention, no one tried to impede their path. Gilriant reflected they probably supplied the place with plenty of gossip and speculation for days. There was also the nagging feeling there was more he needed to learn and discover. That was accompanied by the impression it wasn’t an immediate issue. Just another thing to add to his rather long to do list.

When they got a distance from the settlement, the formation relaxed from holding tight positions around him. Haldir moved up next to Gilriant and peered at the kitten, which had fallen asleep, curled up in a fold of his tunic. “It’s probably a good thing that by this point people expect odd things to happen around you.” The marchwarden remarked with a good bit of humor.

“Speaking of interesting things, I had an idea and a small favor to ask.” Haldir’s eyebrows lifted, inviting him to continue. “Technically speaking the favor is from everyone here.” While he already knew they all kept part of their awareness focused on his well being, he could feel their attention at his words. “I would like you not to mention the whole, I can change my own gender to anyone yet.” Ferdil was the one to get it first. “You want a chance to explore this without outside eyes and expectations.” The young elf nodded. “Yes. I’m not asking you to lie, but how many people are going to ask that question?” Maethel’s voice had some fond resignation to it. “People are going to figure it out, unless you can change other things about your appearance.”

Now Gilriant brightened, “That’s the thing, I think I can. After all, if I can change my body from female to male, and I can change into a raven, why not other things about me?” There was thoughtful silence about that, taking it as encouragement, the young elf continued. “What if we said I was your cousin Maethel, that I was coming to you for some training? After all, all elves are kin in some fashion.” The captain’s voice was thoughtful. “Well that would give us reasons to associate with you, and can even say we asked Haldir to assist with it. That won't hold forever.” “It doesn’t need to. For the people paying attention that’s going to only be really noticeable when it's time for me to go back to Imladris or one of the other elf havens. If the people that really need to know haven’t figured it out by then I will tell them.”

“And the King is likely to insist you stay in The Greenwood for the next decade, at a minimum.” Gonben observed. Which wasn’t all that long in the term of elf life spans. It was reasonable, especially with the ability of Hedwig to quickly transport him home for short visits. “I’d say more like eight decades to match Imladris.” Roitaro suggested. “He can insist all that he wants, he won’t get to dictate where I go and where I live.” Gilriant replied with an amused tone. “And he will try,” Haldir shared the amusement.

“You know, I never really did ask all of you what you wanted.” Gilriant frowned, flicking his gaze around at the guard. He didn’t have to ask Haldir, they have had that conversation many times. “After all, you have already been kept away from your home for eighty years.” “Don’t make me channel the King and call you an idiot,” Ferdil quickly replied. “You are our Prince now. We go where you go. Besides, if you try to get rid of us, the King will likely try to push an even larger group on you.” “One that will be far more into protocol and you would have to break them in to your standards. Do you really want to waste the time on that?” Alright Erecthel had an excellent point, but still.

“I haven’t even done anything to really deserve that kind of loyalty.” Gilriant couldn’t help but to point out. The scoffing sound came from Maethel. “So it was someone else that made an agreement with literal death in part to bring the lost ones home? Or sent the Starlight Wolves to protect the Greenwood? Lets not forget you literally took on the King’s pain in order to heal him.” “Ah,” the young elf blinked. These were not widely known facts. Yet it didn’t shock him that someone told them. They did happen to be present for the last. They needed to know everything in order to be the best possible guard for him. “Well yes, but I was also the one given the opportunity.” At that Hedwig gave him a scolding trill, before lightly nipping his ear with her beak. “Ow! Okay okay, geeze.”

“The point is, you are our prince and where you go, we will go.” Ferdil said quite firmly. “So why don’t you tell us what you are thinking, that way we are prepared.” Haldir leaned over and poked Gilriant in the forehead. “Stop overthinking things. Trust that if there is an issue, they will bring it to you. Until that happens, stop inventing problems that aren’t there.” When now awake Weasley decided to add his two cents with a squeaky meow, Gilriant gave up. “Alright, alright. I’ll trust in you all and stop.” Hedwig gave an approving croon and preened his hair.

“They want me to spend time in all of the elf havens, and in truth I am not opposed to this, as I have connections to them all. The majority of the time will likely be split between two places. Imladris for my family, especially Atar. The Greenwood in part because around its borders is where much of the conflict I need to help settle is. With the occasional visits to the hobbits, dwarves, and men.” Gilriant’s gaze turned inward as he thought, knowing the others would look out for him while he was preoccupied.

“There is much to learn, and strength to be gained if I want to be ready in time.” The group was quiet as they absorbed that statement. Haldir finally asked gently. “How much time?” Gilriant hummed thoughtfully as he tried to tease that information out. “Less than two centuries, more than one and half.” For an elf, not very long at all. They now understood why the young prince may feel some sort of inner urgency to learn and grow. “Ready for what?” The marchwarden kept his voice quiet and soft. If one pushed too hard, it was possible to lose the thread entirely. “Fire, fire and greed.” He shook his head a little. “Sorry, I can’t see anything more than that.”
“It gives us a starting point,” Gonben pointed out. “That’s something.”

“Well it's not Curunir, which is a whole other problem.” Gilriant frowned. “I gave Mirthrandir a warning. I can only hope that he’s keeping an eye on things. That istari still has the potential to go either way. I like it not.” “Not everything is your responsibility,” Haldir replied mildly. “You gave the warning. For now focus on what you can do.”

“I know, I know, it's just so frustrating.” “Learn how to let it go. And if you break out into that song, again, I will tell your father. Remember what he said last time?” Haldir’s threat made Gilriant snicker. Apparently he had sung that particular song one too many times one day and even the patient bard got irritated with it. Seems like he wasn’t the only one.

The days had been growing shorter, so the sun was setting by the time they reached Thranduil’s halls. Gilriant had tucked the kitten in his tunic to help keep Weasley warm so he had both hands free to help take the tack off and groom his horse. While some people might see that as being beneath him, the young elf saw it as being properly appreciative of the help he had been given. He was just finishing this up when Legolas found them. “You’re back.”

Giving the horse one more pat he turned towards the door of the stall. “Yes, I did say it wasn’t going to be a long trip.” He saw Ferdil carry the basket out, knowing the guard would leave his items in his rooms and deal with the rest. “Weather is starting to get a bit cold for camping outside and I’m not going to make everyone sleep inside the mountain.” When Gilriant turned, the other princes’ eyes dropped to the orange head sticking out from the neck of his tunic. “And you have a new friend.”

“Ah yes, I got Hedwig’s approval after he found me.” She gave a trill of confirmation, still keeping to her perch on his shoulder. Carefully he pulled the kitten out of his tunic. Legolas held his hand out for the kitten to sniff before rubbing the orange cat between the ears. The rumbling purr, loud for such a little thing, had the blond prince breaking into a smile. “Well if Lady Hedwig approves I doubt any would dare argue with her.” “That was my thought,” Gilriant admitted with a grin.

“You may want to leave him in your rooms for dinner. I do not think my father would appreciate a cat at the table.” Legolas suggested with a grin. “We were planning on cleaning up anyways,” Haldir commented as he strode up with the bag. “An easy way to keep the peace.” “Or cut down on snide comments,” Gilriant added cheerfully.

*

Gilriant had woken up feeling off. Like he just didn’t fit right in his body. It left him feeling sluggish and like he didn’t quite want to get out of bed and face the world. Before he could struggle to open his eyes, there was a rumbling purr from Weasley. The kitten had tucked himself in the crook of the elf’s neck while he was sleeping. It was oddly soothing and he reached to pet the kitten, taking comfort in the action.

He felt the side of the bed dip as the familiar presence of Haldir settled on it. The older elf must have woken early and come back to check on him. “One of those days is it? Maybe you should try shifting your body today. I can get Maethel and ask for a change of clothes. I believe she doesn’t have any assigned tasks for today that cannot be put off.” The marchwarden knew Gilriant better than the young elf knew themselves at times. Their partner’s ability to tap into their feelings and mental state, helpful beyond words.

“Yeah,” Gilriant’s voice rasped as they finally opened their eyes. “I think that would be a good idea.” Reaching to hold the kitten in place, they slowly sat up and moved over to the table. Haldir set a plate in front of them before pressing a kiss to their forehead before leaving to find Maethel. Weasley settled on their shoulder as they worked through the plate in front of them. While food didn’t have a particular appeal at the moment, they knew they needed the fuel.

Before they finished, Haldir reappeared with Maethel carrying a bag. Wordlessly the pair helped them finish getting around. The marchwarden reached for the kitten. “I’m afraid it is probably best to leave Weasley here for now. Another time we can teach him to follow us around the forest.” With a nod, Gilriant gave the kitten one last stroke before letting the older elf take him. “You guard the rooms then little one, we’ll be back later.” The kitten gave a squeaky meow in reply before dashing off to check on another part of their rooms.

They slipped out of the halls and made their way into the forest. Everything close to Thranduil’s Halls was safe, especially after Gilriant had put the initial wards up. Going out into the forest was a good choice as it would more easily allow the young elf to connect with nature. Which should ease the transition on their body. They found a clearing not too far off and Gilriant settled in the middle of it. Knowing that Haldir and Maethel were close helped them to feel safe. Not just physically safe, but in a secure place to let go and explore this side of themselves.

Closing their eyes they sought out the core of themselves. The part that was the essence of all that they were and could be. If their theories were correct, slipping into a female form should be relatively easy. The difficult part might be the other changes. Then again perhaps not. They were meant to be balanced. So the female and male parts of them should have some differences. That is what they focused on.

The memory of Lily Potter, their birth mother rose in their thoughts. She was strong, fierce, unbending and willing to do what was needed to protect those she loved. It was her sacrifice that allowed them to survive. If his male self still carried some similarities to the father of his birth, perhaps her female self should resemble that of her mother. It was that thought lingering in their mind when the magic unfurled and stretched.

It was an odd feeling, of their self shifting and and changing. Not painful, perhaps just a little bit itchy. They wondered if this was how a reptile felt when it shed its too small too old skin in favor of the new. Yet at the same time this wasn’t new at all. Instead it was just what was hidden inside her, all this time. Only now everyone else could finally see it too.

Opening her eyes she looked down at her form. Her hands were a little slimmer, but not by much. It was the clothing bagging on her in most places and a little tighter in one that stood out the most. When Haldir offered her a hand up, and she finally stood, one change became very apparent. “I shrank?” “Well, you always did complain about being too tall.” The marchwarden seemed more amused than anything else. “The clothes should still work, just tighten them up a little,” Said Maethel thoughtfully.

“Your eyes are still the same, but the rest of you looks very different.” Haldir handed Gilriant a mirror. Taking it she took in her own new features. Yes the green eyes were the same, but her features had shifted, and warm auburn hair graced her head. “I was thinking about my mother.” She admitted softly. The higher pitched voice sounded different, but good she thought. It would be interesting to see what it sounded like when she sang. “Everyone before, said I looked like my birth father. I thought maybe, it would be good if I looked like my mother.” The young elf confessed. “You look beautiful,” Maethel smiled. “Here, try these on. I can always get you more clothing that’s closer to your size now that we know what it is later.”

“You might want to get Hedwig in on that. She seems to be in charge of my wardrobe.” Gilriant replied wryly even as she changed into the different clothing. Her body was shaped differently, so having things that fit this form made sense. It wasn’t odd having Haldir helping her because it didn’t matter what shape she took, he was hers and she was his. So l little things like this didn’t matter. She considered the boots for a moment before pulling those on too. Bad enough having the same green eyes, if she went barefoot too, that might clue people in faster than she wanted. Plus, it didn’t quite feel as wrong now. Haldir helped her adjust her braids to something different that would suit her.

“Should we call her and Fawkes here so they don’t get startled later on?” The marchwarden suggested. “Hmm, yes, good idea. It won’t matter to Hallows and Tindil but for those two it may take a second.” A moment later a swirl of snowflakes and one of fire announced the arrival of the two phoenixes. They circled Gilriant, giving some confused trills back and forth before they each landed on one of her shoulders. “Yes, it’s still me. I just look a little different.”

The two birds trilled back and forth to each other before Hedwig trilled a question at the young elf and she chuckled. “Yes I will be getting new clothes, Maethel is going to do that I’m sure she will call you to help.” The guard inclined her head when Hedwig looked over at her. “But of course.”

Fawkes trilled a question of his own and Gilriant laughed. “Yes, we will still be doing pranks. I have a good one I’ll need your help with soon.” The fire phoenix gave a happy croon at that and preened her hair even as Hedwig scolded him and Haldir chuckled. “I see he has his priorities straight.” Ignoring that comment, the young elf addressed the birds. “So we aren’t telling everyone yet. I want a chance to experience it without outside expectations, okay?” There was another conversation over her head and then Hedwig trilled again to her. “As long as it doesn’t interfere with your duties. I totally get that.”

Both the birds cuddled up to her and she laughed again. “I love you too. Now I have some things to learn, so feel free to go back to what you were doing. How is father doing Fawkes?” Now the fire phoenix seemed supremely amused as he trilled. “Reeeeaaaaally, interesting. Thanks for letting me know.” She pressed a kiss to his beak. “I’ll have to go there in person to check on him soon. Now go keep an eye on him.” Fawkes gave her hair one last preen before launching into the sky to disappear in a swirl of fire. Haldir lifted an eyebrow and she grinned. “Will tell you later.” Gilriant turned toward Hedwig, and the ice phoenix trilled in response. “Huh, well okay. Go and have fun.” She gave the ice phoenix a kiss before she too flew away. “Apparently someone annoyed her so she keeps randomly dumping snow on their head. Not sure who or why.” She shrugged.

“Anyways, I want to see how things feel different, so. . .” With a grin Gilriant swarmed up the side of the tree leaving the other two to follow.” Maethel just shook her head before starting her climb. “At least we will never be bored.”

It was just like before, and just like Narinzel claimed, freeing. She let the forest guide her steps, easily slipping from one tree to the next with a laugh. It was thrilling, gliding from branch to branch with quickly moving steps. As close to the feeling of flying as you could get without actually using wings. No fear, only the joy in movement. Gilriant knew that Haldir would always be able to follow her, so she didn’t worry about losing the pair. Instead kept her focus on following the direction she was being guided to.

When the faint guidance stopped, she gracefully descended, dropping from branch to branch until she hit the ground. Haldir and Maethel landed just a short time after her. “Well you decidedly have a handle on that.” Her captain said cheerfully. “Oh look, something else you should try.” She could hear the amusement in the marchwarden’s voice as Gilriant turned to spot the archery range. “Noooooooo, the trees are traitors.” Amused Maethel guided the reluctant elf towards the range. “Nonsense, they know what you need. Plus it's hardly like you could have gotten worse at it.” Gilriant glared at her, “You want to bet on that? Because I wouldn’t.”

Legolas was looking for Gilriant. There was someone he thought his friend would enjoy meeting, but for some odd reason the young elf was nowhere to be found. It was possible he was off flying but he still followed the impulse to head towards the archery range. Which honestly wasn’t a likely place to find him but it was worth checking. When he got close an angry female voice caused him to blink. “This is absolute bullshit I tell you. Haldir, STOP LAUGHING AT ME.”

As he moved closer, he spotted the targets first. Neatly lined up bullseyes, one after another at varying distances. Even where shots were precisely lined up to make crosses across the targets. As he looked, another arrow was loosed and landed precisely on top of another, splitting it all the way to the bullseye. Not something he had seen often. It spoke of a very high level of skill. He spotted a red-headed female elf that seemed to be cursing out Haldir who was bent over in helpless laughter. He had never seen the other elf that amused before. Meathel also looked highly entertained. The red-head was the one with the bow.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone be angry about shooting well before.” For some reason his comment made Haldir burst into more laughter as both the females turned to spot him. “It’s fucking stupid, that’s why!” That made Legolas blink again, not expecting the hostility aimed in his direction. Maethel pinched the bridge of her nose. “Please excuse my cousin, prince Legolas. She was sent to me for some training. Which apparently needs to include decorum.” The red-head blinked and then looked at the prince and flushed. “Right, my apologies.” At Maethel’s glare she hastily added, “Prince Legolas.” He waved a hand in dismissal. “It’s fine. I’m just curious as to why you are so angry.”

“I told you that you were using the wrong bow. Now maybe you will listen to me?” Maethel had turned towards her cousin as she spoke. “Now that you have a proper one, of course you can shoot better.” The red-head huffed. “Right, well I guess I will need to listen to you more in the future.” The captain of Prince Gilriant’s guard smiled. “I will hold you to that.”

Looking at the targets, Legolas made a decision. He could always find Gilriant later. When someone showed this level of talent, it was something to be nurtured. “Well, you certainly need more of a challenge than that. Come, I’ll show you to a better one.” The red-head blinked. “You don’t need to do that.” The prince gave her an easy smile. “Nonsense, I’m happy to help out Maethel’s cousin.” He paused. “I don’t think I have heard your name yet.”

The red-head blinked at him wide-eyed. Maethel nudged her and finally she blurted out. “Tauriel, it's ah, Tauriel.” “Then come now Tauriel, let's find you a real challenge.”