Only a fool for you

Now Barty Crouch Jr prided himself on being a lot of things.

 Intuitive? Yeah sure. 

Petty? Well of course.

Insanely gorgeous? Was that even a question?

Absolutely bat shit crazy? Well all the best people are.

But one thing that Barty would never ever admit to being, was a coward. He wasn't! He wasn't because he was constantly rushing into things that scared him and he very rarely cared about the consequences. So no he wasn't a coward. At least until it came to things that really mattered, like the two guys he was absolutely gone for. He never wanted to fall for either of them. I mean name a bigger self sabotage than falling for your best friend who's straight and a bloody Gryffindor that hated everything about him.

He supposes it must have something to do with his home life. He spent so long being told about the things he couldn't have from his father. You're not smart enough for that Bartimus, You're gonna have to be better if you want that, son. So Barty got into the habit of needing things that he 'shouldn't’ have. He knew who he was and what he could do and he would be damned if that old prick that calls himself his father was gonna tell Barty what he could do. He became smarter out of pure spite. He got into slytherin because of an off handed comment his dad said once about him getting eaten alive in there. He kissed his first bloke right in front of his dad just because Bartimus Crouch Sr said that, that sort of thing was disgusting. So all this to say that Barty was pretty good at getting the things that he 'couldn't’ have… well until them.

Barty had met Evan Rosier the first day at Hogwarts, conveniently right as he was sitting on that itchy chair to put on that stupid old hat. He remembered seeing him sitting at the Slytherin table looking so bored out of his mind and Barty knew without a doubt that he would be in his life and if he wasn't set on getting into Slytherin enough, the pretty blonde boy sure was more convincing. So Barty got into Slytherin and he thinks that he had summoned all of the luck that he would ever have to be able to get to room with the pretty boy. Barty had immediately ran to the boy to learn everything that one could learn about a person. It had taken some time for Evan to actually open up but once he did, once he finally cracked that small smile from one of Bartys jokes, he knew that he was hooked. 

But as Barty said he had been a big fat coward when it came to Evan Rosier and thus 4 years went by and Barty was so firmly placed in the friend zone he couldn't even see the light. Well that's not true because deep down Barty knew that he had a chance. He knew that some of the things that Evan said to him weren't always just friendly and that the way they touched wasn't normal. But as you know Barty was scared because Evan was the one true, pure and absolutely lovely thing in his life and he couldn't lose him. So Barty didn't say anything (mostly) and he kept his hands to himself (sorta) and it was all fine. Until it wasn't because mixing Barty Crouch with a bunch of suppressed emotions was never a good mix. It was a Friday night when everything had just spilled out of him. There was a party and both Barty and Evan were drunk and the latter had been snogging quite aggressively with some random Hufflepuff. Barty saw it and obviously lost his mind, he ran over and yanked the two blokes away from each other (when did Evan even start like blokes?) before storming off and bringing Evan with him. Barty blew up and said things that he really didn't mean and Evan got hurt and locked himself in his bed for the rest of the night. It took a week for Barty to finally get Evan to forgive him and Barty had decided that it was enough and he was so tired of hiding these feelings, so he kissed him. He kissed him so hard he thought that both their lips were gonna bruise and after all Evan had to say was 'it's about time you idiot’ and then they were kissing again. Barty was happy, he was so happy in that moment that he thought his chest was gonna explode. He had gotten everything that he wanted…well almost.

Barty has always known about Peter Pettigrew, more so about the three idiots he hung out with than him but he still knew who Peter was. Barty knew of Peter and he hated him, for the sole reason that he is friends with Sirius Black and Sirius was dead to Barty.

If Barty had always known that he would be in love with Evan then he had also always known that Regulus would be his other half, his purely platonic soulmate. He had also met Regulus when he had walked into his room and saw that he would be his roommate and Barty somehow knew that Regulus would understand him better than anyone else. So if Barty ever needed to talk to someone he went to Reggie. If he ever needed help to teach someone a lesson Reg was the first one behind him. It took a little for Regulus to trust him as much as Barty trusted the boy but slowly it happened. So you can imagine Bartys disdain when Regulus came back to school last year broken and depressed because his brother had left him alone in that god awful house. Barty hated Sirius and thus also hated Potter, Lupin, and Pettigrew. 

Barty had also always hated herbology. He thought it was boring and useless and never really saw the intrigue. He would dread the hours that he would have to spend in that stuffy greenhouse, until after Christmas. All of a sudden Pettigrew was his partner and all of a sudden Barty couldn't wait to get to be in that greenhouse and bother the crap out of the ‘maurader’. It had started off very rocky, purely because Pettigrew was ignoring him and there was very little that Barty hated more than being ignored. It was more than that though, for some reason Peter being the one that was ignoring him made his blood boil and made him want to set the whole world on fire purely for Peter to have no distractions, so he did. Or well he tried and it wasn't the whole world just the back half of the greenhouse but it did its job because it finally got Pettigrew to talk to him. It was fun after that purely for entertainment because it was just so bloody amazing watching Peter snap at him when he got on his nerves and it made Barty feel like he was on the top of the world because he saw a side of Peter no one else got to, it was always ‘awww Peter is so sweet’. No one knew about his sharp tongue and bone chilling glare. It thrilled Barty to no end.

It stayed like that for a while and it was easy for Barty to pretend that this thing with Pettigrew hadn't turned into a full blown obsession. He was quite good at it really but then Peter just had to go and flirt back, Barty thought that he might actually die because of the way that he forgot how to get air into his lungs. He was so far gone and the scary part was that he never really wanted to come back. So Barty let it get out of hand he truly was a terrible person because he could tell that Peter was in it too, that maybe he really did like Barty and Barty honest to god would have done something about it if Evan hadn't of happened first. So Barty had to choose and he chose Evan but Barty is selfish. He is so selfish because he still wanted Peter to be in his life. Come on, he pretended to be ‘just friends’ with Evan for years, he could do it with Peter too. But once again he was a coward and he saw Peter slip away in herbology and he let him. He regretted it, he regretted it so much that he found himself watching Peter more often than he would have liked. So much that of course Evan had noticed. It was only two weeks before Summer break when Evan had forcefully pulled him out of the great hall.

'I'm so sick of this Barty!’ Evan had shoved him into their room with such force that Barty almost stumbled to the ground.

‘Sick? Sick of what Ev I don't under-’

‘Oh don't give me that crap.’ Barry could feel his heart pounding aching to jump across to Evan because that's where it belonged. It belonged with him and he couldn't be done with his heart already.

‘Please Ev, I can do better I swear please let me.’ Evan’s face changed suddenly from anger to confusion and sadness before the walls were up and he was back to anger.

‘Do better? Merlin Barty I see the way you look at him! I won't be your second choice so you need to choose, right now. Me or him.’ Barty didn't know that he could freeze as hard as he didn't at that moment, he didn't know that the blood in his veins could literally run cold.

‘I-’ Barty had to take a few seconds before he could respond because despite whatever feelings he had for Peter, he physically needed Evan and he would not lose him for some school crush. 'I'm so sorry Ev, I'll forget about him I swear. It's you, it's always you.’

He could see Evan melt at the words that Barty told him before he looked him straight in the eyes, searching for something. He seemed to have found it because he fell into Barty’s arms. Hours later while they were just laying in bed Evan asked quietly

'Tell me about him, so you can get it out of your system. Before you're never allowed to be in the same place as him again.’ Barty chuckled lightly before giving in and confessing to Evan all of the feelings that he had felt for Peter in the short time that he had known him. He could feel Evan's eye rolls and light scoffs as he said something but he could tell that Evan was listening and understanding where he was coming from. 

‘You really care about him’ it wasn't a question and there was no doubt in Evan’s voice but Barty needed to make sure that Evan knew that he would pick him every time.

‘I care about you more.’ Evan just simply nodded before burying his face into Bartys neck.

‘You can have him too you know’ Barty scoffed a little before Evan abruptly sat up to look him in his eyes.

'No i'm serious, it's a thing we can do. Not for everyone but, well you really like Pettigrew and it's making you miserable like this so…you can have him too if you want.’ It was a rope, Evan was throwing him a rope and maybe if he grabbed it he could save himself from this pit of despair that he feels everytime he sees Peter but well as we have all discussed Barty is a bloody coward when it comes to the heart.

‘Nah, you're all I need.’ Barty felt a little like a part of his heart was missing.

He stayed true to his word though. Evan is all that he needs and so he pushed down all of his feeling for Pettigrew and locked them up tight, only letting them out on special occasions like letting himself watch as Peter laughed unashamed in the halls or allowing himself to break his quill when he had to see Peter's new herbology partner rest her hand on his arm as she explained something to him. He gave himself little indulgences and the rest of the time he was having the time of his life with Evan. It wasn't easy to ignore his feelings for Pettigrew but it got less painful and Barty thought that maybe they had faded. Well that was until Reggie dragged him to Three broomsticks to meet his new boy toy and he saw Peter up close again. He didn't stand a chance. It was like lightning struck the cage that Barty hid his feelings for Peter in and not only did it free them but it set them on bloody fire. He is just so pretty it hurts.

It took a beat for Barty to come back to reality and understand that he probably should say something. No, that he needed to say something because Peter was avoiding his eyes again much like he did the first day that they were paired together and Barty would be damned if he was gonna let Peter ignore him again. 

“Yeah good to see ya, Pete.” Barty wanted to scream in triumph when those beautiful brown eyes landed on him. He wanted them to stay on him forever.

“Peter, come and get the drinks ordered with me will you?” Barty’s heart ached as he watched Peter's gaze shift to Lupin before giving him a small smile and nodding his head. Barty wanted to bash his own head in, no actually he wanted to bash Lupins head in because who does he think he is? He's glaring at Barty as if he knows something and oh Barty is seeing red as he watches Lupin put his hand on Peter's back to lead him to the bar. He must've moved on instinct because he hadn't realized he'd done it before he felt Evans calming hand on his forearm to ground him. Barty could feel his muscles relax instantly as he looked into his boyfriend's eyes. Evan wore a soft knowing look before shaking his head slightly and pulling Barty back to his position at his side. He's grateful to see that the conversation had moved on and no one had seen his mini outburst.

Eventually their table was ready and they got to sit down and a nice round table right next to the girls, who whooped and cheered as they made their way in. As everyone was getting situated he noticed Evan very subtly getting people to move until there were two empty chairs, one in the middle of Evan and Barty and one next to Sirius. Barty was confused for a second and tried moving chairs so that he was closer to Evan but he just gave him a withering glare that made Barty instantly go back to his own seat. It wasn't until Peter and Remus returned with the drinks that Barty understood what Evan had done. Oh Barty could kiss that boy til their lips bled. He could feel the little jolt of excitement as Lupin looked at the table and sent Barty a glare which he returned with a smug smile. Lupin fussed for a moment before finally giving up and taking his seat next to Sirius who looked at him questioningly but Barty didn't care what kind of secret conversation they were having because Peter was right there looking so adorably flustered as he came over and stopped next to Evan.

“I can switch you, if you want. So you can sit by your boyfriend.” Oh this boy will be the death of me.

“Nah that's alright, I sit by him all the time. Besides, I wanna learn more about the new couple and he’ll only distract me.” Barty really is in love with a genius. He could barely contain his excitement as Peter's beautiful eyes landed back on him.

“Oh what's wrong, Peter? Don't you wanna sit by me? We have so much to catch up on” He flashed Peter one of his smiles that always got him to flush last year in herbology and sure enough it delivered. Though Barty couldn't appreciate it nearly as much as he wanted to because Peter quickly sat in his seat and hid his face in the menu. 

This is going to be the best lunch of my life.