Brownies and Nicknames
The September moon does not leave Remus unconscious for more than a few hours, but he almost wishes it had.
The moon itself wasn’t all that bad. Despite making up with Sirius, he still wasn’t letting the others join him in the shack again, which he paid for in countless bruises and a few small cuts on his thigh. But the wolf was excited to be back at Hogwarts (however uncomfortable, the shack was undoubtedly better than his father’s basement), and the fact that Remus was spending more time with padfoot seemed to reassure Moony that his pack might not have abandoned him.
And since the moon fell on a Saturday this month, he hadn’t even missed any classes.
So the moon wasn’t the reason he desperately wished he could close his eyes and forget he was a person.
That would be a certain dark haired boy and the overwhelming smell of chocolate.
“Do you like them?” Sirius asked, fidgeting with the tray so much Remus was worried the brownies might fall off. “I figured you’re always so hungry after the moon, and Ephie made these a lot over the summer and they reminded me of you, and you said your parents don’t bake, and who am I kidding? I knew this was to much, I’m sorry-”
Stupid fucking Sirius Black, being so kind and wonderful but so awful and confusing the hell out of Remus. Moony’s mind hadn’t quite slipped away from him yet, so he was using what little energy he had to stop his brain from panicking and when the wolf tried to wag his tail and found that human Remus didn’t have one. He didn’t have the brain power to try and figure out the paradox that was Sirius Black.
Honestly, Remus. He could almost hear his Mam chiding him. You’re overthinking things again. Just take the chocolate.
He blinked as he realized Sirius was still talking, and decided to put him out of his misery (even if he doesn’t deserve it, the angry part of him said).
“Thanks, Sirius. They smell great.” Remus said as he pushed himself into a sitting position to accept the tray.
Sirius blew out a sigh of relief and sank into one of the chairs Madame Pomfrey had set up beside the bed.
”They better smell great.This prat kept me up till two last night making sure they were perfect.” James said as he plopped down at Remus’s feet and eyeing the brownies. “ You aren’t going to eat all of those on your own right? I skipped lunch today.”
Remus shrugged and let him grab a slice as Peter launched into a story about their most recent prank.
It’s peaceful, and it almost feels like before. Except Sirius keeps shooting Remus these anxious glances and smiles and Remus is too tired for that right now. And maybe it will be like this from now on and Remus doesn’t think either of them can stand the thought of that. So for now he’ll stuff his face with chocolate and ignore the problem.
It’s a plan that’s never really worked for him before, but that’s never stopped him before, and it sure as hell isn’t doing to stop him now.
…
“And why are you giving me this?” Leonora asks, eyeing the beaten up copy of Moby Dick in her lap like it might explode any second.
It had only been a week since Remus had made the half thought through decision to leave a note on the bedside table of his-friends-very-estranged-and-possibly-death-eater-and-extremely-possibly-murderous-sister.
Remus had spent the whole next day deeply regretting it. But Leonora had shown up, and though silence was defining that first night, they’d both shown up again the night after that.
So they’d fallen into a routine of sorts, however haphazardly it had been constructed.
They’d sit and talk. And, against all odds, Remus had found himself enjoying the Slytherin’s company.
She could form and fire insults faster than Sirius and James combined, and once Remus had prodded enough, she’d revealed that her skill extended to sarcastic commentary as well.
She and Lily would get along. He thought after being witness to an extremely… creative speech about James Potter and his stupid optimism and his stupid jokes and his stupid quidditch strategies.
But unlike talking with Lily, the two of them knew they were talking to get away from everything else. So they pointedly ignored those two first meetings, and never asked about anything that mattered. He refrained from mentioning Sirius or her family, and she didn’t utter a word when he came straight from the hospital wing with a limp. They had an understanding.
So it wasn’t just out of obligation that Remus continued coming up to the tower, sleeping in between classes and on the weekend to make time to talk or study with Leonora. And now it seemed, to exchange books.
“I thought you might like something to read after class. Since you seem intent on moping around your common room and not talking to your dorm mates, you can at least have the company of words.” Remus shrugged. “Plus, it’s a good book. Lots of internal Monologue and brooding. You’ll love it.”
That earned him a glare. “I talk to my dorm mates.”
“Sure you do. What are their names again?”
“Crouch. Roiser. Greengrass. Wilkes.”
“First names, Leo.”
Remus took a moment to smile in victory when Leonora didn’t respond, before noticing her shift in demeanor.
It hadn’t taken long for Remus to find out that she generally had an impassable mask, keeping all her emotions tucked neatly into boxes. Sirius had done the same thing in first year. It had taken years of James openness and Peter’s encouragement to finally wear him down.
Remus has never been particularly socially adept (being homeschooled and not allowed to interact with other kids for fear of his secret being revealed can do that to a child), but one of the very few perks of being a werewolf was his hyper awareness of every movement near him.
He catches the way she leaned slightly away, the tightening of her shoulders, the leap in her heart rate. Those things generally weren’t a good sign. He tried to filter through what he could have said wrong.
“You don’t like the nickname?” He guesses.
“It’s fine.” She says. The lack of any emotion in her voice was decidedly Not Fine At All.
He raises an eyebrow at her. “Yeah, no.”
Leonora sighs.
“Bellatrix-my cousin, used to call me that.” It sounded like there was a lot more to that story, but he knew that pushing for more information than she was ready to give would only succeed in getting him a black eye.
“Well, I don’t want to have anything in common with Bellatrix.” He says instead. “But you still need a nickname. James would be disappointed otherwise. How’s Nora?”
Leonora glared at him. Not that then.
“Umm…” It was blatantly obvious that all the nicknaming genius lay in the other marauders. “What does your name mean?”
“Pardon?”
“My name basically means werewolf mcwolf, which is how I got stuck with Moony.” It’s the same fabrication he told Marlene and Mary when they asked. It was a lot too close to the truth for Remus’s comfort, but then again, all the best lies were.
After a second, Leonora finally responded. “It’s supposed to feminine version of the constellation Leo. Everyone in my family is named for the stars.”
Remus frowned, trying to think of Leo related names. Sirius was always making various star puns, and combined with their required astronomy lessons, it shouldn’t be too hard to come up with something.
“What about Denebola? That’s a star in Leo right? Umm…” He blanked, trying to recall the others. “Zosma? Regulus?”
“I see the marauders' madness has finally infected you.” Leonora replied dryly.
“That happened ages ago. Don’t change the topic. I kinda like Regulus.”
“I… don’t hate it.” She said carefully.
“That’s a yes.” Remus smiled. “Pleasure doing business with you Regulus Black.”