In A Rush

James was leaving in a rush. Like, why are there so many people on the street this time of the day? It was the first time he was submitted a task like this by his boss (Professor) and he was intended to make it right. So, he left his shift early (consented by Mr. Barry, of course), four o’clock in the afternoon and there’s people everywhere. He doesn’t have a car, and there’s no use taking the train, his boss’s apartment is up close. Usually, James doesn’t care if people like him or not, because everyone does. How can one be so sweet and kind and funny and adorable and not be loved by every single human being on this planet (ok, this is an exaggeration, but it is very much close to reality)? So, Mr. Barry is kind of a problem in James’s life. He is the head doctor in the hospital James just initiated his career as an intern. But oh. The man is so scary, and at the same time, he is awesome. Like, very much amazing. Which isn’t helpful to think about when he is demanding things and shouting at James (and all of the interns) to do things right.

Why does he hate me? is a question that keeps ricocheting in his head. But, right now, he has to focus in getting to the head D’s place and finding his journal (the one with the green cover and a dark red human heart design - heart anatomy) Well, it also gives james the perfect opportunity to take a sneak peek of the notes his professor has, it would really help in-

“Sorry.” the person who james just collided in the middle of the sidewalk murmured. Right, technically, it was James’ fault, because he wasn’t paying attention, being lost in thought. 

“No, no. I’m sorry” He apologizes. “Wasn’t paying attention, again, sorry.” He muttered, beginning to walk away when the person just called him out.

“Wait. James?” 

This voice. No, it can’t be. Now that his brain stopped paying attention, his mind is running a million miles per hour. And he doesn’t even understand the miles system. Okay, a million kilometers per hour then? Makes more sense and is extremely accurate right now. 

“Regulus?” The question was barely a breath, but he knew the other person heard him. Loud and clear.

“Yes” 

Well, if it isn’t Regulus Black flesh and bone right here, in front of him. Regulus looks so… different than he remembers. But, he saw him for the last time like what? Eight years ago? 

He looks good. His eyes are the same grayish blue, except that they look more alive now then all of those years ago. His hair is shorter, but not so much. He looks taller and even a little muscular. His skin still glows and his smile, James couldn’t tell, because he isn’t smiling 

right now. His face looks neutral, except for the slightest furrow in his brows. “Uh. Hi, Reg” 

“Hi, James.” Still nothing but a scowl. What is going on in this man’s mind? 

“So… how have you been?” James tried the lamest way of making conversation after a few seconds of uncomfortable silence. Except he is supposed to get to his boss’s place. Fuck, he can’t be here bumping into the past and forgetting about his duties. Regulus is still scowling and hasn’t answered James’ question. That’s my cue, I guess? “Sorry, Reg. I really gotta go” Regulus still hasn’t said anything, so James murmurs a gentle ‘bye’ and leaves. He doesn’t look back, but he can still feel Regulus's eyes on his back, glaring at him and burning his soul. Damn it.

###

Green journal, dark red heart. These five words float James’ mind with so much effort right now, because he has a job to do, and all he can think about is Regulus. Like, don’t get James wrong, he doesn’t feel anything for the man, he is just… surprised. It has been years, so many years since he last saw Reg. Sirius, on the other hand, was at his flat yesterday and probably will be there today and tomorrow and the day after. 

Green journal, dark red heart. Focus, James. Focus. But, how is he doing? What is he doing for a living? It has been so long. He seemed fine, really fine. And what about Elliot? Journal! Green and red heart! James remembers himself as he opens the door to the flat. Wow, just wow. The place is huge. As you open the door, there’s a cozy living room with a bookshelf that goes for a whole wall in front of the sofas, which, by the way, look so comfy that James could sleep there for over a day. There’s a mini table there, too, and it is a little bit of a mess, with open books, notebooks, one empty mug of coffee, And ha! journals. Loads and loads of journals, all kinds of journals, all full os notes and drawings and everything a student would kill to put a hand on. James is only human, so he goes for all of the pages he can, and even snaps some pictures of ones he finds super mega useful for his journey in medicine. Like, how does this guy have so many detailed notes on viruses? Did he deepen in this study too? How can one be so wise? 

Ugh. Focus, James! Right. Where’s the journal he came looking for? All of these are amazing, but not the one Mr. Barry asked for. Fuck, why is this so complicated? He doesn’t want to go through the house of the man, or through his things (let’s pretend the books and the journals don’t count, for james’ sake, please). But if it isn’t in here, where the fuck could it be? kitchen? No, he checked. Guest bathroom? Also, no. Oh. Oh, not the bedroom, please. In between this internal debate, he got a text from the professor, asking why he was taking so long and, uh, for James not to get in his bedroom. It was something like 

Dr A. Barry: “Potter! Where the fuck are you?” 

Dr A. Barry:“Come back soon and with my journal!”

Dr A. Barry: “Please.”

Dr A. Barry: “And DON’T go through my privacy” 

Dr A. Barry: “Please.”

How cute. He is a very rough guy, and sometimes saying ‘please’ is an annoyance to him, especially to interns, who are like the gum that sticks to a shoe in a hospital hierarchy. But, well, James Potter was so well raised that his politeness was contagious. He was so polite towards everyone equally that he made his boss uncomfortable for being a little shit. So yeah, Mr. Barry now says ‘please’. 

James typed as fast as he could. “Of course, sir.” No, he didn’t think to tell about the journal that was probably in his privacy, or ask if he could go there. Don’t judge him, he was panicking. Right, let’s analyze the options:

1. Don’t go there, don’t take the journal and go back with empty hands. 

2. Go there, take the journal and complete the task he was given successfully. 

Option one is a straight no. The professor will be mad, even if he tries to explain, he won’t listen and he will lose the chance to make him like James forever! Yes, James is dramatic, old news. Well, for option two, he would be a step closer to gaining Mr. Barry’s trust and he would never know what James did to get there. Perfect. But oh. I shouldn’t do this, it is wrong. By now he could be crying, he isn’t, but he could. Oh, God. Why is it so hard to be a good person and to survive at his job at the same time? Ugh. Life sucks, but this journal is getting to the hospital. Right, bedroom door is it. 

Breathe in, Prongs. You can do this. And so he goes. The door he’s looking for is next to the bathroom in the hallway. He opens it thanking God it wasn’t locked. It could be, since his professor sends interns here all the time. And oh. He has really good taste. What a pretty room. And so cozy. James! Journal! Right. He looks over to the nightstand and there it is. Thank God. He takes it, puts it in the bag he’s carrying with him and takes the first step to leave when he freezes.

 There’s a picture on the wall of a young lady. A child even, and the picture looks so old and so familiar that makes James stop for a moment. Who is she? An old girlfriend, maybe? some old love he didn’t get over? Honestly, James understands. |

So it goes. James leaves and walks (runs) to the hospital. 

###

Regulus is still in his head when he makes it to Barry’s office. He is still good looking, of course. But no, James isn’t attracted to him, no, not anymore. That was a long time ago and now he is living a happy life and he doesn’t need the drama. No, thank you. He got over whatever they had ages ago. He is happy now. He is, truly. And he’s even got a crush! Her name is Arabella and she is amazing! Has James talked to her? No. Will he? Um… no? She hates him, he thinks.  But well, he can’t make her like him, so he just accepts it and thinks of her like a hallway crush, you know? The one you don’t really wanna talk to, just a silly crush. Someone you find pretty. 

And well, Regulus. He would like to talk to him. Wait. No, he wouldn’t. Would he? Why would he want Regulus in his life again? Didn’t go well the last time. And what the fuck is he doing here? wasn’t he like, in France? Living far, far away? And Sirius didn’t say anything! His brother is back and he didn’t say a word. Huh. Weird, and also, not cool. He would like to know. In the end, Regulus was an old friend, so yeah, James would like news on an old friend.

But not in that way, you know. No, he doesn’t feel that way for Regulus anymore. Not anymore. But they could be friends? Why? Why do I want to make friends? I have friends! I love them! And Sirius is going to be jealous. Yeah. So no friends. New friends. No friends with Regulus. He doesn’t even like me! Does he?  

Well. He didn’t keep contact. He just left. If he valued James, he would’ve kept contact. But he didn’t. He didn’t call once. He didn’t call James, because he called the others, sometimes and he calls Sirius constantly. Of course he calls Sirius, he’s his brother! But he didn’t call you. Okay, fair. So Regulus doesn’t care, whatever. James got over him not caring too. James is really fine with this situation. Really f-

“Potter! Hello! Are you even here?” Mr. Barry’s eyebrows were almost reaching his hairline as his eyes widened a little bit whilst staring at James. 

“Uhm. Sorry, sir. Here’s what you asked for.” He takes the book out of his bag and handles it to the doctor. He’s still processing that he somehow entered the office and was probably lost in thought for a moment before Professor Barry zapped him out of it. Now his face is burning and he’s sure the man in front of him can see his blush of shame, because he tries to keep a straight face as the side of his lips twitch a little. 

“Right. Great, Potter.” Barry looks at James, who’s still standing in front of him waiting to be dismissed. “You may go. Um… Thanks” 

He barely breathed the last word, but James heard it and oh he is thriving. Is he the first intern to have ever got a ‘thanks’ from him? probably. Is he going to throw a party later? Obviously. He can’t wait to tell Sirius.

“Of course, professor. Anytime” James answered with a nod and a smile ear to ear, making his way out of the office. 

Later, that evening, Sirius got home. He somehow managed to press the door handle with his foot, as both of his hands were busy holding bottles of whiskey. “Harry said thank you! We need a party!”

And James laughed, Sirius of course barged in making an entrance. “It’s Barry,” James corrected. “And he said ‘thanks’. ‘Thank you’ is way too much for him” James says, still beaming. 

“Mate, listen to me. It’s just a matter of time until he is loving you like everyone else.” Sirius rolls his eyes and follows James to the couch, leaving the bottles somewhere in between his way. “And why do you even want his approval this bad? You never told me, and I know you and you’re not like this.” He points out, curiously, as he lays his head in James’ lap and close his eyes, thinking (well, that must hurt) “Usually, at least” 

“I don’t know. I guess I just want him to like me?” James shrugs. “I look up to him, so yeah. I want him to like me.” 

“Mhm. Got it. Like me and Minnie!” Sirius beams at the thought, eyes still closed.

James just laughs again. “Exactly!” He plays with Sirius’ curls, now with a little furrow between his brows. “You didn’t tell me Regulus is back.” James points out. There’s hurt in his voice, but it’s something barely unnoticeable, not to Sirius, though. James can feel his friend stiffen up at the mention of his brother. They don’t talk about Reg. They just don’t. 

“He’s only back for the summer, I think. Uh, I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier. He just got back” Sirius apologizes, opening his eyes so James can see he’s being very sincere. Brotherly eye communication, it’s just a thing they do and that only they can understand.

“No, no. Don’t apologize” James says. “There’s nothing you have to be sorry for.” 

“I know.” Sirius affirms. “Relax, mate I know.” And there’s more to it. Because Sirius knows absolutely everything about James and about that and he just knows. “But how did you know? That he was back, I mean” Sirius questions.

“I bumped into him in the street.” James replies, shrugging and massaging Sirius’ scalp by now. 

“Oh.” Sirius mouthed. Understanding in his eyes as he gets up and asks James, “That went well, no?” He  laughed and looked at his mate, and in a matter of seconds, they were both cracking up like little kids who have no worries except homework and win over their crushes. Oh, life. 

“Really. We barely spoke.” James states, still catching his breath. “I was in a rush to get Barry the fucking journal.” He smiles towards Sirius.

“Right. Harry’s journal! The one that conquered you a ‘thanks’” Sirius exclaims, a grin finding its way to his mouth. 

“Yes! Can we drink now? You still have to tell me about your bloke!” 

“YES PLEASE!” Sirius rushes over to the kitchen and takes the glasses and a bottle on his way back to the couch. “So, um, he's blond and he loves the moon and he makes me think of Moony”

“Moony? The mysterious kid we met when we were sixteen?” 

“That’s the one”

“Why him?”

“His name is Remus,” Sirius declares. “And he's got a moon tattoo and he doesn't give a shit about me, Prongs” Sirius says rather dramatically, resting a hand on his forehead for acting purposes only. 

James listens to his best friend babbling about a guy he has been crushing hard on since the first day he stepped in Sirius’ café. He comes everyday, buys a coffee and goes, pretending Sirius wasn't flirting with him while making his coffee. 

Moony, on the other hand, was a kid they shared a summer with years ago. They were all sixteen, which means they were young and beautiful and craving for adventures many only dream to go through. Everyone was gathered in james’ grandparents’ house, and suddenly there was this new kid in the neighborhood, who was spending the season with his grandparents while his folks were on a working trip. They quickly befriended the kid, especially Sirius, who was in awe. They never really introduced themselves with real names, it was always Prongs, Padfoot and Wormtail when they were kids. And Moony was the guy they met one day mooning over the late night sky. it was their first escapade of this world as we know it.

And Sirius doesn’t shut up until they’re both so drunk and tired that they pass out on the living room floor.